A week after she leaves Dillon she receives an email from him. She hesitates for couple of hours before finally reading it.
There's nothing in the subject line.
"It will never be over between us. It will always be you and me. Even if we are with other people."
That's it. Just those three sentences. She knows her was probably drunk when he typed the email. Her heart breaks even more right then and there. She doesn't reply. She just closes her laptop and cries herself to sleep.
He doesn't expect her to respond to his email. Although he was drunk when he wrote it, he just wanted her to know that what they shared, scratch that, still share is really special. Nothing more than that. He didn't write this email for her to come back, he just wanted to put it all out there for her.
The months seem to fly by. She's in her first semester of senior year in college. She's having a girls' night with all of her dorm friends. They've got a bunch of bottles of wine lying around. Tonight is the first time that she speaks of him to anyone else outside of Dillon. She tells her friends their history. She starts the story with Jason Street and ends it with Tim Riggins. She ends the story by telling them that Tim Riggins is forever engraved in her heart.
When everyone leaves, she opens up he laptop, as she sits in her bed, rereading his email. She wants to click the reply button, but she doesn't really know what to say to him. She closes the laptop and decides to go to sleep.
She wakes up the next day with a nagging feeling in the back of her mind. Something has changed. She doesn't know what it is, but she definitely knows that something changed.
A month later she gets a call from her dad.
"Hey daddy. How's everything?" She asks him.
There's a pause on the line. She senses that her dad didn't just call to chitchat with her like he normally does.
"What is it dad?" She's the one to break the silence, nudging her father to break the news.
"Lyla, honey, I think you should sit down and prepare yourself for what I'm about to tell you." What he says to her just puts her more in a panic mode.
"Dad, just tell me." She's impatient now. She wants to hear what he has to say.
She hears him sigh on the other end. She braces herself for the news that's about to come.
"Riggins is getting married." She heard and read about people's world shattering around them. But she never imagined that it would feel like this. She feels tears well up in her eyes. She takes a deep breath, willing her voice to remain steady as she speaks.
"Daddy, thank you for letting me know. I'm in the middle of studying for a big test so I will call you tomorrow, ok?" She hears her voice break on the last part. Instinctively she bites her lip.
"Lyla, baby, are you ok?" She realizes her father is worried about her.
"Yeah, dad, I'll be fine. I'll call you tomorrow." She doesn't even wait for him to respond, she just hangs up the phone.
She sits still in her place for what seems like hours. Finally, she peels herself from her seat and goes over to the kitchen to retrieve a bottle of whiskey from the liquor cabinet. She half-realizes that it's probably not a good idea to be drinking by herself, alone, but shuts those thoughts away from her mind. All she can picture now is him. His face pops in her face like it's the only thing she's ever seen in her life. And she takes a swig, not even bothering to pour it into a shot glass. She drinks because she can't help to relive the memories. And she drinks because she wants to suppress those memories. As she's about halfway through the bottle, she feels the tears coming down her face. And she lets them. She cries for him, for her, for their lost time, and for their love lost.
She stumbles over to the her iPod and connects it to the speakers. She searches for her special mix, once she finds it the first song that she plays is one by Blue Merle. The song begins to play and she closes her eyes as her head leans against the couch. The memories of the three of them in Mexico replay in her head. And she just sits there, with her eyes closed and the tears threatening to escape. And just like that the song ends and the next one come on. And as she hears the first chords of the song, she opens her eyes and allows her tears to flow out freely. She just sits there and listens to the lyrics.
"One day it's gonna happen. I don't know when. I'll be on your street. But I know one day. It's gonna happen. You're going to be swept off your feet." She lets the music wash over her. This song never held any significance in their relationship. But she added it to her mix after hearing it for the first time, because she thought it fit them so well.
She walks over to her bedroom and grabs her laptop. She comes back into the living room and presses rewind on her iPod. As the beginning chords begin she hits reply to Tim's last email. She doesn't even think whether his email address is still good. She's on a mission now and there's no backing out.
"Ditto…"
That's all she types. She just attaches two mp.3 files to her response and clicks send. She sets her laptop aside and gets up to skip through the final song of the mix. She's ready to hear it. She's ready for the waterworks to begin. She hears James Blunt's voice come on and silently sings along. She crawls onto the couch and falls asleep as the song plays in the background.
Over coffee in the morning he checks his email. He sees one from her. Somehow he knows that she found out about his engagement. He's hesitant to read what she says, half expecting her to rant out all of her frustrations. He never expected what he saw. Just one word and two mp.3. He downloads the files right away and plays them on his iTunes. First song he hears, he's taken back to the time when she down to Mexico. He's thankful that he has the house to himself this morning. The next song begins to play. He doesn't recognize it. He just sits there and listens to it and lets the words sink into him.
She wakes up the next day with a huge hangover. It's kind of expected since she drank the whole bottle of whiskey. She vaguely notices that her phone is ringing. Ignoring it she makes her way to the bathroom. She takes a shower as he hums a song. When she's all dressed she makes her way back to the living room. She checks her phone, one missed call from dad. She sets her phone aside as she picks up her laptop. She notices one new email. She vaguely remembers sending an email to Tim. She checks the new email and her heart skips a beat. It's from him. She quickly opens it.
"I'll love you forever…"
That's all it says. In that moment she realizes in a way it's him saying goodbye to her all over again. She closes the computer and makes a beeline for the door. She gets in her car and drives to the nearest church she can find. It's been years since she's been inside one, but right at that moment she feels like it's a right thing to do. She's glad it's empty. She makes her way down the pews and sits down in the third row. Immediately she kneels down. She rests her head in her hands and asks God to give her guidance to get through this.
It's May. Her graduation is two days away. She's excited. She's already got an awesome job position lined up in Dallas. Her dad is coming tomorrow. She sits on the library steps with her friends. At that moment, Tim Riggins flashes through her mind for the first time since she found out about his engagement.
Graduation. She spends her whole day with her father who came down to see her walk the stage in her cap and gown. As he's about to get in his car to drive back to Dillon he tells her she should come down for the summer before she starts her job. She laughs and tells him that she'll think about it.
That night, after a night of partying and celebrating, she finally gets to her dorm room. She knows she's got a long day of packing ahead of her tomorrow as she makes her way to the bathroom. She hears a sound in the background, she knows she just got a new email.
She slowly makes her way to her computer. And just like that, when she least expects it, there's an email from Tim. And all that it gives her is an address.
She's been in Dillon for two days. After being away from this place for so long she realizes that she missed it. She missed this small town that changed her life forever. She hangs around the house, goes to visit Saracens. She has yet to see him. Somehow she avoids all the places he would be. Like her dad's bar.
It takes her another five days to finally gather enough courage to drive down to the address he gave her. Through the whole drive she mentally tells herself she can't back out, she has to do it.
She pulls up to a house on one of the side road. It's not big, but it's definitely him. She parks her car and gets out. She doesn't know what she is doing here. She quickly thinks about getting back in her car and driving away. Instead she decides to walk around the property. She takes in everything that she sees. As much as she wants to explore the inside of the house, she slowly makes her way towards the back porch.
As she turns the corner, she notices him standing there with a beer in his hand, looking out at the land that laid before him. His land. Her breath catches in her throat as she realizes that he hasn't changed a bit. He still looked like the old Tim Riggins that she remembered from high school. And she can't help but to stand there and just stare.
He slowly turns his head to her. He looks at her for a moment before his smirk starts to display itself. It's all the encouragement she needs to proceed and stand right next to him. He hands her his beer and she takes a swig. Before she has a chance to return the bottle to him he speaks.
"You made it…"
As soon as those words leave his mouth she jumps into she arms. At the moment she doesn't care if his wife is inside, or even if he has a wife. All that's driving her is her love for the man that stands in front of her.
He holds her in his arms, taking her scent in. He can hear her silent cries escape her. He let's her go and takes a step back.
"What do you want?" he asks. And his question isn't rude or inquisitive. It's a whisper. She lifts her head and looks him in the eye.
"You."
He closes his eyes.
"What else do you want?" he asks again before opening his eyes and looking at her.
"You." She doesn't look away. Instead she steps in and kisses him. And he kisses her back.
He takes her hand and leads her inside the house. She doesn't even think twice about it. He takes her into his bedroom…there will be time to explore the house later. She sits on the edge of the bed and he sits down beside her. He doesn't look at her right away. They just sit there for a while until she decides to slip her hand into his. And just like that his attention is back on her. He looks at her for a moment before putting his beer down on the floor and laying both of them down on his bed. As she gets comfortable in his arms, her hand slips over to his heart. She can feel it beating beneath the fabric of his shirt. With the steady beat against her hand she closes her eyes and falls asleep.
She wakes in the early hours of the morning. She turns her head towards the window and notices that the sun isn't out yet. As she turns her head back to Tim she notices his open eyes.
"Hi"
"Hi," she replies.
"Thanks for coming back."
A small smile makes its way onto her face. "You're welcome."
He grins back at her. He scoops her closer into his arms and kisses her forehead. And this time there is no breaking hearts. There are no goodbyes. This time they both know it's forever. And she feels like she's home again.