Hi. I'm Tessa Rose, sole heiress to the Rose Empire. My best friend is my bodyguard, Saraphina Kahn. She goes everywhere with me, and saves me from my many disasters. But this time she can't save me. This time I have nothing to do but obey. Well there's that, or complain like a two year old.

"I REFUSE TO BE MARRIED TO THAT JERK!!!!!"

By the way, did I mention I'm about to be married?

I was in the back of my parent's new limo, screaming my 16 year old lungs out.

"NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!!!!" I shouted furious that they would do this.

"Tessa dear, I am afraid you don't have much choice in the matter. It was decided at your births, and it will happen whether you would like it to or not." My mother said gazing carelessly at her fingernails.

"I hate you." I hissed, and she merely patted the top of my head." Yes dear, I know. I love you too." she said, and pressed the intercom button. "Joseph, please hurry. Tessa is to be at the airport in 10 mere minutes." she said, giving instructions to the driver.

Allow me to explain my wonderful predicament. It's my 16th birthday today, and I thought I'd have a GREAT day. Hey, it's my sweet 16, who wouldn't think that. But I should have known something would happen, I guess I did. But no gut feeling would have been enough to prepare me for this shock. You see, around lunch I was called to the parlour by my parents. I had hoped they were going to give me a present or something, but I had no such luck.

"Tessa my girl, your Mother and I have something important we'd like to tell you." My dad had said with a smile.

This is it! They got me a car, didn't they? Ooh or maybe its tickets to Josh Turner!!!! I thought excitedly.

"You are." my dad had started

"Getting married." finished my mother.

"MARRIED?!!!!" I had screamed, standing up. My face was pale. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN MARRIED?!!!!!"

My brain had been having a hard time processing this all. Oh, and the finishing each other's sentences thing? Not helping.

Fowl Manor, Dublin, Ireland

"Arty Dear, come to the lounge!" his mother called, her crystal voice ringing through the hall. Artemis looked up from his communicator. "Coming!" he replied, and turned back to the electronic device. "Sorry again Holly, I guess we'll have to continue this later. I'll have full results by then." he said, and the red headed elf rolled her eyes, scowling. "Hurry up then." she said, and closed the link. Artemis put it away, and walked into the lounge where his parents sat, looking as happy as ever." We have a visitor coming. She is a very special visitor, one that will change your life, and future." His mother giggled, and he sat down across from them. "Do I know this visitor?" he asked, and his mother burst out in giddy giggles again. "You shall know her soon Arty-boy." his father said, smiling.

'What are these two talking about...no...No...No...' he thought, his eyes widening.

"What's going on?" he demanded, and his father stood up. "Artemis, when you were born it was arranged that you and Cole's soon to be born daughter would be wed. It was a very important promise, which I intend to keep." He explained, and Angeline stood up and hugged him. "Ooh My baby boy is getting married!!!!" she said happily, crying with joy.

"I'm getting...married???" he murmured, and pulled away from his mother.

"To whom?" he asked "Do I know them...well...her?"

"Well yes, you did meet her. When you were 3, again when you turned 5, and again when you were 10." His mother explained. "You do remember her don't you? Tessa Rose." she said, and Artemis racked the memory part of his large brain.

'Goblins, No. Opal Koboi, No. Holly, No. Taking gold from the fairies, No...OH!!!!' He thought, hitting a memory.

"Arty, this is Tessa, remember her?" His mother smiled, and pushed a timid young girl towards him. Artemis eyed her up and down, and returned to the personal disc-man he was taking apart. "Now play nice you two." His mother said, and walked out.

"What are you doing?" She asked, her voice hardly audible.
"Nothing you would ever comprehend. Stop bothering me." He muttered.
"I-I was only a-asking-"
"Yes, well there's really no point in asking when you won't understand. But do you truly wish for me to explain? Fine. I shall."
"B-But-"
"I'm reconfiguring the structure of the laser disk reader into that of a true laser. One that will be strong enough to cut through three inches of solid steel, the exact amount of the safe door that's holding my tools that my father confiscated."
"Re-configuring…but that's wrong! And impossible!"
He smirked and raised one black eyebrow, holding up the disc-man. He pressed one slender finger onto the play button, chuckling as a beam of energy shot past her ear, singing her hair. She cried out in pain and fell onto her rear end. "Hey!"
"Impossible? Is it really…?"
"Fat-headed pig-boy!"

'Oh...her.' he thought.

"Well Arty, I'm sure you need time to prepare. She will be arriving soon." his parents said, and walked out.

"Tessa huh?" Artemis said. 'This isn't going to end well…' He could see the disaster now…

Well. It's official. I'm going to commit suicide on a plane. My parents loaded me onto a plain set for Dublin Ireland, and sent Kahn along with me. Thank god for that. Now I'll have someone to deliver my last will!

"Kahn save me." I moaned, and Kahn patted my back supportively. "I'm afraid I can't do that Tessa. This is one mess I can't get you out of." She said, and I bashed my head against the window. "This is stupid." I muttered, and closed my eyes. 'Isn't there some kind of law against forcing your kids to get married?! What ever happened to true love, and-and finding your soul mate! Call me a hopeless romantic, but aren't those supposed to mean…some…thing…?' my thoughts trailed off with a snore.

A LONG time later, I was awoken by 'gentle' shaking from Kahn. "Tessa we're at the airport. We've just landed. Wake up." she said, and I opened an eye. "They better have a bed at this stupid manor." I mumbled, and shuffled off the private jet. Hey, my parents are rich. It's not my fault.

Kahn and I walked into the terminal, looking for the idiot's bodyguard, Butler. We had a picture of him, and by the looks of it, he wouldn't be that hard to find. Finally after about 10 minutes we spotted his cleanly shaven head and his bulky form and walked over. I decided it's be better to make a friend out of him rather than an enemy. Especially seeing as he looked as if he could snap me like a twig. "Um, are you Butler?" I asked politely, and he nodded. "Yes, you must be Tessa, pleased to meet you." He said. I smiled. "Pleasure's all mine." I said, extending my hand. He shook it, and pointed to a Bentley Red Tag sitting outside. "Come, I'll escort you to the Manor. "he said, and led us outside.

Leaning against the car was a boy about my age with messy, yet still neat, black hair which hung in his eyes, which were closed. His arms, which were folded over his chest, were thin. He didn't look as if he got much physical exercise, or got outside much, for that matter.

You think he's hot don't you

Shut up you.

You like him

Shut up brain, I don't need your garbage.

haha

I shook my head as the dude looked up, his crystal blue eyes staring at me. And that's when it hit me.

"Hello, My name is Artemis Fowl. Pleased to meet yo-"

And right around there was when it hit him. My fist, I mean.