Oh~ Merry Christmas everyone! (even if its a tad bit late). And Happy New Year in advance!:)
Once again requested by Zakura16. (I hope you will enjoy it;)
Disclaimer:Do not own VK- which belongs to Hino-sensei. Neither the song-which belongs to Sammy Cahn and Jule Styne.
Beta Reader: Gothic13Hinata13
Let Me Cry
(Kaname's POV)
My eyebrows furrowed together as I carefully inspected the burned cake before me. Man, I am terrible at cooking! How could my sweet lover make such delicious treats was something I hadn't figured out yet! We always had fights about cooking, but in the end we will always end in each other's arms after simply, mind-blowing love...
I persuaded my lips into a thin line as heat raked through my body uncontrollably. It's been only one week and I already missed my lover's touch. Pout. My lover hasn't been away for so long...Must be a very important business, I thought much to my dismay.
Ah, if you are wondering who this lover of mine is, let me introduce him even if he is not here currently. Zero Kiryuu- yup, that's his brilliant name- is the son of a noble man and the current head of his port business. He is very sweet and kind, and can be quite a jerk when he wants to be; but nonetheless I love him.
On the other hand, I am the son of merchant. Kuran Kaname is my great name. Once upon a time, the Kuran family was very rich, but something drastic happened in the business, and my great-grandparent's hard work was flushed into the drain. They had nearly become street beggars, but thanks to the knowledge of my grandfather, the Kuran family came into line of merchants and became quite famous too in the weaponry world, I added smugly.
I am working hard to be my father's successor, but my dearest father is never satisfied with the work I do! How uncool is that! He must have surely seen how hard I work, but never even say a good word to me! Weren't parents supposed to be encouraging their children? In this case, it's the opposite.
Aside from my history, you might also wondering how rich person like Zero could be with someone as average as me? Don't worry, its quite simple. My beautiful Zero had seen me in a club, and I him; and we quickly hit off with each other in the hotel room. Ours clothes gone as we made ourselves comfortable on the large bed. Well, Zero had to pay for the room's bill because it was way to expensive for me.
From then on, we started get along and soon enough, started dating. Its been successfully a year since we started dating- much to Zero's surprise, who doesn't get along with anyone else- except of me of course.
I am afraid that Zero will leave me one day, but I will be ready. For now, I will enjoy the time that I and Zero spent together and make many beautiful memories together.
I heard the door opening and saw a very tired Zero standing there, his hand clutching the bag in his hand, while his other hand was clenched together in a fist.
I happily stood up from the couch and was about to go and hug my dearest lover, when he stopped me with the motion of his hand.
My garnet eyes worriedly searched for any sign at what this was about, but to my sadness, the eyes I love so much were cast down and studying the floor as if it was the most interesting thing.
We stood there in an awkward silence, until I broke with my shaky for I couldn't take it anymore.
''Zero...what is it?"
He sighed and finally turned his gaze on me, the guilt on those eyes churning my stomach.
''Kaname, I am sorry..." He apologized and I couldn't phantom why this was making me afraid. "I love you very much, but...'' My heart leaped in joy as I heard this and my thought of marrying Zero would come true; but the ending of his sentence sounded too sorrowful in my ears.
''But what?" I asked dreadfully. This scene was reminding me of a movie I saw just the other day. The one about a rich guy and poor girl. They were happy together, but one day, the boy comes and...and…breaks with her because he already has a fiancé...
''I want to break up for our own good.'' There it was. The thing I dreaded the most with our time together. No...I can't live without Zero. There is no meaning to my life if Zero is not by my side.
''Zero...why?" Shameful tears started ran down my face and my body started to tremble uncontrollably.
I had to just know the reason. I clamped my hands against my mouth, to muffle the shameful sob making its way through my mouth.
''My parents arranged a suitable fiancé for me. He is the prince of this country, Rido. I protested that I love someone else, but they didn't listen. I am sorry Kaname, but we can't be together. Fate is not letting us. I accepted it, and I hope you can too.'' Zero slowly walked towards me and embraced me, wiping the tears from eyes as lovingly he would do always. I could see the love in his eyes; and my heart clenched painful when I thought I won't ever see those eyes again...
Oh, the weather outside is frightful,
But the fire is so delightful,
And since we've no place to go,
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow
I just stood there and let him embrace me. This was too much for me to handle. Zero was being so cruel to me. How can he request me to accept such a thing? How can he easily accept the decision his parents forced down on him? Weren't the moments we spent together anything to him? What about our feelings? Didn't it mean any importance to him?
I knew someday it would have ended like this, but it was soon. I wasn't ready as much as I thought I would be.
I felt him loosening his embrace, but I didn't let him. I wrapped my arms around him and clutched him as tightly as I could. I can't leave him because I love him too much. I don't care what anybody says about us, only Zero's opinion matter to me, but I don't know if Zero feels the same as me...
''Zero, please don't leave me! I love you! I will do whatever you say to me! Just don't leave me. I will die without you...'' When my legs could no longer hold me, I slowly slid down against his body, my whole world falling apart as I looked into space with my hopeless eyes. Zero is leaving me. What worst could happen? And he can't do a damn thing about it.
It doesn't show signs of stopping,
And I've bought some corn for popping,
The lights are turned way down low,
Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!
''Kaname. I am sorry...'' Bending down, he once again apologized, brought me to his arms lovingly- I wonder if that's a word I could use even now- and kissed me passionately. I could feel the bitter-sweet feeling between us as we engaged into a battle of dominance.
I closed my eyes as bliss surrounded me and grabbed his hair to deepen our kiss. He picked me up and made his way to our bedroom. Zero placed me gently on the bed and once again kissed me. I groaned when his hand made its way under my t-shirt.
This will be our last night together. The last time we will make love. The last time I would be able to love and hold Zero...Tomorrow everything would go to how things were before a year ago. We will be strangers once again.
I will work under my father as Zero will travel around the world, working on his business.
We will be doing our work, but the only difference would that Zero would have somebody by his side, while I won't have no one. Who will I want when I already love Zero so much?
I willed myself to get rid of these thoughts. I am intending to enjoy my last night with my dearest lover to the fullest. I will have the rest of my life to grieve...
When we finally kiss goodnight,
How I'll hate going out in the storm,
But if you'll really hold me tight,
All the way home I'll be warm.
The light intruded itself to the dark room, falling on the occupant lying on the bed. I opened my eyes and unconsciously, my hand reached forward to grab the person I love, only to meet with the empty space.
I am hopeless. I knew Zero won't be here the next morning, but my heart can't just stop hoping. Is that a bad thing?
I chewed my lips as renewed tears started to ran down my cheeks, wetting the pillow under me. I won't be able to see Zero again. Never have a chance to be with the silver-haired man again. This is reality. Few people have the chance to be with their love one forever; and unfortunately, I wasn't one of them.
My gift for Zero forgotten under the Christmas tree. I was about to propose Zero and already made my plans to live with him in the small villa on the country-side. I had bought the villa with all my life-saving money so Zero could be happy, but I guess it was for nothing. I can't go and live there alone. It would be very painful...
I closed my eyes in pure anguish and clutched the sheet draped over me. Zero must have put it on me. At least he cares, I thought bitterly.
I hope Zero would be happy with his new lover- even if my hearts truly denies it. My only wish for Christmas is Zero to be happy. Zero's happiness is my happiness even if it is not with me.
''Merry Christmas, Zero...'' I whispered into thin air. I could imagine him smiling at me as he bend down and kissed my lips lovingly. Whispering sweet words in my ears and we cuddled with each other.
I would once again celebrating Christmas with my father alone...
Sorrow always follows happiness...and now it is my turn to cry.
The fire is slowly dying,
And my dear, we're still good-bying,
As long as you love me so,
Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!
I hope I managed to write this successfully!:) Poor Kaname~ I really hate myself for hurting him like this! *strangles myself*
Anyway, I really hope you review~:) Kaname needs all the comfort you can give him! *chuckles*