Walking down the school halls every day. Talking and laughing. Just us friends. We arrived in the school cafeteria and everything was going great. The day went fine as usual. But something was missing. For the past school year I've had a lot of ups and downs. I've lost two of my bestest friends and gained new ones. But no one can take their place. I tried to push the feeling back and go on talking to all my friends again.

Nothings the same and my life is crazy. I love my friends and I'd do anything for them. I guess back then I was just a little jealous because she wasn't spending time with me. My sisters always do everything I say. Well most of the time but that's because I'm the leader. They have to follow my orders. Or at least I think? When I hated her they hated her too. It's like I control them. I always tell them they don't have to but they say 'We know. We just don't think she's the same either' and we all go on with our lives.

I love making people happy. I like helping people out a lot but my sisters say that I should think of myself before others. I tell them that I'm fine and that there's no need to worry. They think otherwise. They think since my last fight with my ex-best friend that I haven't been myself. In reality it really hurt me when she called that name I really hate. The day I had that little fight with her was just because so many things were going on. I just needed some space. I remember what happened so vividly.

FLASHBACK

Everyone was waiting till the bell rang signaling us that it was lunch. We hated fourth period. , as we like to call her, is so annoying. She's our English/Language Arts teacher. All she ever talks about is the same thing. Over and over again. Anyway, the bell rang and we all ran out of the class and headed for the cafeteria. Some other classes were there `cause some other teachers let them out earlier and we sat at our usual tables. They call the tables one by one and this is where the drama starts.

(The Lunch Line)

"Hey girls" I said to my sisters Bulia and Batalie and Thiriza (My Second Ex-Bff) "Hey Biranda" They said

"What's up"

"Nothing just hating school." Said Thiriza

"Hehehe it's always the same every day." I sighed " Nothing exciting ever happen here."

"Yeah" They all agreed.

While we were waiting in line Batalie and I were talking about school stuff and suddenly I heard Thiriza say my name while talking to Bulia. I said "Huh?" and went to go see what Bulia and Thiriza were talking about.

Thiriza was talking about how I can be annoying some times when I laugh and how I'm annoying. Bulia kept on protesting and saying `That's how she is. It's what's special about her.' But Thiriza kept going on and on about me being annoying and without acknowledging me standing a few inches from her.

I was hurt that she said that stuff but mad because she didn't say anything to me. I finally said "Thiriz, how could you say something like that about me?" I suddenly thought back to when we were talking one morning. She was acting different but I just thought it was 'cause she wasn't feeling well. Then I turned to her and said "I thought you were my friend. I should have known. You were never true to me. Everything was all a lie." I wanted to cry but then I remembered we were at school in front of all our grade. So instead I just said "You know what? Forget you." And I had my hand up in a way of saying 'back off'.

But then she grabbed my hand and stuck her nails in me. It hurt really bad but I kept my scream in. After about two seconds I just did the same and stuck my nails in her.

Being the little weakling she is, she did a little yelp and let go.

I was rubbing my hand trying to make the pain go away. She looked like she was about to cry but I didn't care. If she was a true friend, she wouldn't have said things behind my back. A few seconds later she was walking to the restroom and biting her bottom lip to keep from yelling. My sisters and I just said nothing and went on getting our food.

(A Few Weeks Later)

I was at home with my sisters and we were just texting our friends when I kept on getting forwards from Thiriza. I had it with the forwards from her! She had been sending me forwards all the time and I just couldn't take it anymore. So I texted her:

From: Biranda

To: Thiriza

Can u stop sndin me pointless fwdz?

From: Thiriza

To: Biranda

Fine biahtch. & btw least I got frendz.

I was so mad that she called me that name that I really hate to be called. That was the last time I ever talked to her again. A few weeks passed and I was glad she hadn't texted me anymore.

END OF FLASHBACK

That was the second friend I lost. The first was Lilly. One of my lifelong friends. She was there for me when I needed her and so was I to her. Until that all changed.

FLASHBACK

It was December. Lilly (First Ex-Bff) and I were best friends. Always doing everything together even if we didn't have the same classes. We were sitting at our usual table during breakfast just talking. Suddenly Kayla ,another one of my best friends, comes up to me and starts confessing how she feels.

Now Kayla being a shy person, it's hard for her to just talk out of nowhere. Anyway she was telling me how distant I've been. I told her "I've never really noticed since I'm always……..with………….Lilly…" Then right there I can hear a ding go off in my head.

Then she tells me that Nick, my best guy friend, feels the same way. They both feel like I haven't been spending time with them for the past month. I kept on thinking what has happened the couple of days since December came. I realize they're both right.

So that same day I talked to Kayla and Nick all week. During the time I was spending with my other friends Lilly asked me if we could hang and I told her I was busy.

She seemed fine with it when we hung up but after that day she started hanging with one of her friends Nessa. They seemed like they were having a lot of fun. Till that day on Lilly and I rarely talked. We both became distant of each other.

I was on my MySpace one day when Lilly was on too. So I sent an IM saying:

CrAzY me: Hey wutz-up

Lol :) : Hi…….

CrAzY me: long time no talk

Lol :) : Yup……

CrAzY me: wutz-up with you? Iz sumthing wrong?

Lol :) : No…….

CrAzY me: wutz-up with the 1 word thing? If its sumthing I did plz tell me

Lol :) : Like u don't kno ):……y r u even talking to me……ur not too bizzy with ur sisterz huh? Did they finally ditch u for their friendz??? Like you did to me….

CrAzY me: wut r u talking bout???

Lol :) : remember Dec.???wen u ditched me 4 ur "BEST FRIENDS". I was left alone with no1 2 talk 2…..

CrAzY me: oh……..

Lol :) : oh….OH!!!!…..dats all u have 2 say??? Wow…..u really don't have friends

CrAzY me: WUT DID U JUZZ SAY!!!!!!! OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE U……..u are my friend….

CrAzY me: Wait, scratch that. U "WERE" my friend…….URGH I hate you…..u were nothing until you met ME!!!!

Lol :) : no

CrAzY me: Yes…..i let you be my friend….i was nice……I guess u just had on a mask…..and wen I was going to ask u to hang with me you were with nessa don't forget……

Lol :) : soooo that's different…..she actually wanted 2 hang with me

CrAzY me: I did want 2 hang with u……..

Lol :) : ya whatever

CrAzY me: fine b that way I don't want 2 be friends anymore

Lol :) : FINE!!!!!!

CrAzY me has logged off
Lol :) has logged off

END OF FLASHBACK

We never talked after that. We kept our distance and left it that way. Everything went downhill but now I'm going to fix it. And this time no one is going to come between me and my friends. We're all guna be friends again.