The Amazing Race
By "Grand Master Shoma"
Disclaimer: I don't own any characters from the games, or anything doing with the games. But I do own this story, so don't steal it.
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GMS: Hello, hello, hello! And welcome to my version of 'The Amazing Race". I'm Grand Master Shoma, and I'm reporting to you live from the Space Colony ARK. With some curtains, a few comfy chairs, this place will turn beautiful. Here, four teams of three, plus an extra to keep them on the right track, will have to race around the globe to go to one of the famous monuments that I myself will choose. Its an arduous journey, but hey, I expect it to be fun and romping with madness. The prize is a dream trip to Maui!! Why Maui? Cause it was the first thing in my head! Now, let's meet our teams!
(A curtain is shown)
GMS: Now, let's meet our first team. It's the team I call Team Mario RPG: Let's give it up for Mario, Bowser, and Peach, direct from the Mushroom Kingdom!!
(Team Mario RPG come in, sitting in three chairs. They blow kisses for fans? I'm not the Judge.)
Bowser: (blows a kiss in his weird style) I live to help.
Mario: No you-a don't!
Bowser: Now I'm gonna bite your head off! I'll help everyone forget all about you!!
Peach: Lemme guess: That's how you think that'll help everyone?
Bowser: Finally, someone gets my drift.
GMS: Right, and you all scare me. Next, these three are Judge Neusy's faves from Super Smash Bros. Melee, it's a shame she's not working with me on this. Thus, I dub this team, Team Judge Neusy's Faves: Let's hear it for Roy (of Fire Emblem: The Sealed Sword), Kirby (of, um, Kirby) and Samus Aran! (of Metroid)
(Now here comes Team Judge Neusy's Faves. They sit in three chairs next to Team Mario RPG)
GMS: Samus, let me say this: This is Earth. You can breathe here. Take the DAMN suit off! Or at least the helmet!!
Samus: FINE! If it'll get you my ass! (Samus removes her helmet, thus revealing a beautiful face; though I don't know how beautiful to say, exactly)
Bowser: (whistling at Samus) Look at you.
(Samus nukes Team Mario RPG with a giant missile; sadly, they live.)
Mario: This is what-a happens when you whistle at-a every girl that comes-a by, Bowser.
Bowser: (mutters under breath) Just like Peach...
Peach: What was that?
Bowser: Oh nothing.
GMS: Next, to my sight, we have Team S.T.E: come out Sonic, Tails, and Eggman!
(Team S.T.E. sits next to Team Judge Neusy's Faves. Sonic laughs slightly at the charred Team Mario RPG)
Sonic: I hope this contest will be fun for all parties.
Eggman: Except for Bowser and his human companions.
Bowser: Human companions? I like that!
Eggman: Thanks! I came up with that myself.
Tails: Eggman! Don't associate with the members of Nintendo that we don't like!
Eggman: Sorry.
GMS: Finally, this team, which is all the way from Rival Schools, is whom I like to call Team Gedo High: Daigo Kazama, Gan Ishida, and Eiji--
(GMS dodges a flying knife)
GMS: I mean Edge Yamada!
(Team Gedo High takes a seat next to Team S.T.E.)
Gan: (whistling to Samus) You're a beautiful lady.
Bowser: You shouldn't have said that!
Gan: What? I was being honest and sincere.
Samus: Thanks. I guess... I'll take that as a compliment.
Daigo: Down, Gan.
Gan: Oh, I see. You want her, don't ya boss?
Bowser, Eggman, and Daigo: WHAT!?
Edge: OOOH!! Samus in a foursome with turtle, boss, and Eggman; F-U-C--
(Daigo smashes him in the face.)
Edge: (in pain) What?
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GMS: Now, there's a fourth member which keeps track of where the teams are. These people, are the most vital of your group.
Bowser: Hey C'mon! We're able to work on our own, aren't we?
Sonic: And aren't there only supposed to be 2 people to a team?
GMS: ... Enough talk!
GMS: For Team Mario RPG, or M.R. for short: Come on down, Luigi!
(Luigi comes in using his Green Missile move to launch himself onto the stage, then lying there on his side.)
Mario: (look of embarrassment) I don't-a know him...
GMS: Next, for Team Judge Neusy's Faves, or J.N.F. for short: Let's go, Captain Douglas Jay Falcon, of F-Zero!!
(Falcon walks in, sitting with his group.)
Falcon: Samus, (eyeing her up and down) you're looking very fine today!
Roy: Alright Falcon, that'll do.
Kirby: Yeah, Samus isn't a prize to be won!
Samus: At least these two act like gentlemen! Thanks, you guys.
Kirby: Aww... you thanked us.
GMS: For Team S.T.E.: from Virtua Fighter, it's Jacky Bryant!!
(Jacky walks out to his assigned team.)
Jacky: Hey Sonic! Tails! Eggman!
Eggman: Hey Jacky!
Sonic: I've always wanted to meet a Virtua Fighter!! Where's your hot sister Sarah?
Jacky: Always ranting something about wanting to beat me!
Eggman: She must not have been held when she was a child.
Jacky: How'd ya know?
GMS: And finally, for Team Gedo High, or G.H. for short, Akira Kazama!!
(Daigo's cute sister, Akira, comes out on stage to Team G.H.)
Akira: Hey Daigo!
Daigo: Hey Akira.
Edge: (lovely voice) Hi Akira.
Bowser: (whistling at Akira) You're looking good.
(Akira goes up to Bowser, and Skull Auras his face, knocking him into the other two.)
Mario: (in pain) Bowser...
Bowser: (in pain) Force of habit...
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GMS: Now, here are four capsules. In each capsule, there is a different route for the teams to take. Select a capsule.
(Four capsules emerge from nowhere. They're colored red, green, yellow, and purple. Luigi takes yellow. Akira takes red. Falcon takes green. And Jacky takes purple.)
GMS: Now, you follow the routes until you reach the Final Destination: the Statue of Liberty, in New York City! I will now teleport you down to Earth through the ARK teleporters, and I wish you luck!
(GMS pushes a button, sending all the teams down to Earth off to separate destinations.)
GMS: Fools... (laughing maniacally) HAHAHAHA!!!
Apollo: Okay me, what the hell are you doing?
GMS: They suspect nothing, especially about their 'prize'.
Apollo: But still, the evil laughing?
GMS: SO?
Apollo: It's not gonna fly.
Stay tuned next time!!!