Shado: Well here's the first chap of the sequel to A Nobody's Heart. I hope you enjoy this as much as you did with the first story!
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Chapter 1 First Sign
It's been five years. Five years since I started living here in Hollow Bastion. Five years in this lovely mansion with my big family. Xentshi had learned to talk, and walk. He's better at walking than Zaixou, which was to be expected. But he still helps her out by holding her hand cutely. The two were inseparable, whenever Zaixou started crying immediately Zexion, Demyx, and Xentshi are at her side calming her down.
A few years back we learned that Zexion couldn't have another baby. His wound from Xaldin's spears permanently damaged Zexion's reproductive system so he wouldn't be able to carry a second child. The news of course devastated Demyx, but Zexion even more. I had a feeling Zexion loved to have a second child, for I believe he had a thing for even numbers. Plus, I suspected he wanted a son too.
So, just to keep my friendship with Zexion, Axel and I decided not to have another child. Yes, we still do sex. But we were careful and used protection, after all Axel was still a horny dog. I just didn't want to have Zexion start feeling jealous or hide his jealousy to the point it drove him mad that I could have another child if I wanted to. At one point he asked me about it.
"Why don't you have another child? I can see it in your eyes, you just won't do it like you're avoiding another child like the plague." Zexion hissed at me.
"Because you're a friend. Your friendship is more important to me than having another child. Besides, Xentshi would have too much responsibility. He would help Zaixou more than a sibling, and it'd make me more stressed." I explained calmly to him.
He blinked, all sense of anger and jealousy gone. He continued to stare at me until he sighed, I caught a glimpse of a small smile forming.
"Sorry, I forgot how you treasure your friendship." Zexion smiled lightly.
"It's fine. At least I don't have to beat that fact into you." I couldn't help but tease.
"Shut up! It was only a one time deal!" he playfully whacked my arm.
"Oh right, and you just confessed you forgot!" I laughed, earning a rare pout from Zexion.
"Still, I at least didn't attack you." he crossed his arms.
"True. I think taking care of children has finally taken a tole on us." I sighed.
"Hm. I agree." Zexion nodded.
Now we're still good friends, helping each other out whenever either of us needed it. Of course this was only the first few years with the kids. I kind of feared the experience with them when they're in the teens, it was just a parental instinct that Xentshi would most definitely be like Axel when it came down with hormones. Still, I loved my son.
And now, it has been about five years since the end of Organization XIII, and I somehow felt a little empty inside. I didn't know why, or when I started to feel empty. But the feeling grew, and the change didn't go unnoticed. At first I was only becoming a little distant, but not something that was serious for anyone to ask questions. After all it was normal for me to become distant for a little bit.
Axel commented that I was often like a zombie when I became distant. That usually bright me back into the conversation, laughing a little. It was our private joke, you see, when I first joined the Organization I was pretty much a zombie. I wouldn't talk, I wouldn't smile, I just frowned and nodded when I understood what was going on. When I didn't understand however, I just avert my eyes and think about it, then whoever was mentoring me explained a little bit more on the detail until I understood.
Of course, now everyone started teasing me about the zombie thing. Really, I had hoped it would just be between me and Axel, but now everyone in the family teased me when I spaced out or didn't join in the conversation much. But of course, the first three months of the empty feeling, the zombie teasing was what brought me back from thinking on it. But as the feeling grew, the zombie teasing became less and less distracting.
But about three and a half months went by, and I was still distant. No matter what I did, the empty feeling never went away. I tried to tease Axel alot more, and I did enjoy the rough sex, but even that didn't fill in the emptiness. I played with Xentshi and Zaixou when they asked, and it was fun because they loved to play the Princess and the Knight. Xentshi was the knight, who protects Princess Zaixou from the big bad monster. Guess who's the monster. That's right. That's me. Yup. But it was still fun.
And when three months went and left there was no change, everyone started to worry.
"What's the matter Roxas?" someone asked everyday when I was thinking to myself. At first I would just reply "Nothing" and walk off. But then halfway throught that month Tifa became persistent, and I was reduced to just shrugging and ignoring her. That habit only increased for everyone who asked what was wrong. I didn't mean to make them irritated, but I didn't know how to explain this empty feeling. I wasn't even sure they would even understand.
"He's starting to become a Cloud Clone." Tifa once commented. And now that name stuck when I didn't give a clear answer to the everday question if I was all right. I really didn't like that nickname, sure, I sort of looked like Cloud, but not enough to be his clone for good's sake! Whenever someone openly called me 'Cloud Clone', I stomped my foot and walked away mumbling something about how to kill off Tifa secretly. But of course, I didn't kill Tifa.
Then one morning.
"Mommy, why is your eyes shiny?" Xentshi asked through a mouthful of cereal.
I blinked. "My eyes aren't shiny."
"Yesh dey are! Look! De're shiny!" Xentshi pointed with one hand, the other hitting the baby table he was sitting in.
Instantly Cloud was at my left, pulling my chin to meet his eyes. I could see fear form in his expression, when he stared at the hint of mako around my pupils. And before I knew it, I was pushed and pulled to Aerith's place. Axel tagging along just to make sure I wouldn't be harmed, plus I knew he wanted to know what was wrong with me. Soon I was standing in Aerith's living room, Cloud going haywire and Axel arguing with him.
It wasn't until Aerith shushed them both with a hard pinch on the cheek, did they go quiet. And I stood there, not really paying attention to what Aerith was doing while she inspected me. She circled around me, taking notice the distant look on my face and not caring I was caught in a circle of a lioness's den. Then she stood in front of me, set both hands on my shoulders, and pushed me down to sit on the couch behind me.
I didn't argue, only blinked in confusion at her. Aerith then proceeded to squat down to my eye level and stared into my eyes. I didn't look away, but even as I stared into her eyes, the emptiness lifted only just a little. But it was only a very tiny bit. Usually her eyes calmed me, but this time it was not so. She sensed my guilt, and stood up straight with a sigh.
"Roxas...what kind of dreams are you having at night?" she asked.
I shrugged, not wanting to explain anything about Aqua and Terra.
"You're lying."
I blinked.
"You look away when you're lying. What have you been dreaming?"
How could she tell the little signs I was lying? I only averted my eyes for a second.
"Roxas." I could tell she didn't want press on, but Aerith knew if she didn't there was no hope.
"...Keyblade masters from ten years past."
"Do you know their names?"
"There are too many to remember."
That was true, but Aqua and Terra stood out most. I just didn't want to bring up their names with Cloud and Axel in the same room.
"How many?"
"I'd say about a hundred or so." I shrugged.
"Hm..."
A few minutes of silence passed. Cloud sighed.
"What do we do?"
"Axel, I think it would be best both you and Roxas take a vacation off of work. I know its only every other weekend, but Roxas needs to take a few weeks off." Aerith explained.
"All right. Then what should I do?" Axel crossed his arms, leaning against the wall as he stared intently at her.
"Try and make him happy. Start with simple, then work your way up to the point where you know you can make him happy." she said with an assuring smile.
I blinked. I already tried that! I tried everything to be happy, or normal, but the empty feeling never left! She glanced at me, before taking a step back with a small frown. My eyes must have glowed a brighter green when I glared, not realizing that my eyes could even do such a thing. Then again I should have known this, for Cloud's changed color depending on what emotion he was going through.
"Roxas!" Cloud snapped his fingers in front of me.
I nearly jumped, blinking out of my glaring gaze to stare in confusion at him.
"How long has this been going on? This feeling of being empty?" Cloud asked.
I stared, realizing he knew what I was going through. After all, he had the same experience. I shrugged.
"Three and a half months maybe."
"And you didn't say anything...why?" Axel stepped forward, arms at his sides and I caught a hint of anger in his sharp, green eyes.
I gulped. "I tried to get rid of the feeling myself..."
"Please tell me you didn't do anything drastic that involves sharp objects?" he asked.
"Never!" I stood up, just about ready to cry from his intense gaze.
Realizing I was about to break down into tears, Axel immediately brought me into a protective embrace. Aerith decided to give us space and pushed Cloud with her to leave us be. When they were gone I whimpered, letting the tears flow. Axel nuzzled my cheek, cooing softly in an attempt to help calm me down. But no matter what he did, the tears kept coming until I cried myself to sleep about an hour later.
The weeks that followed, I do say was happier for me. But the empty feeling didn't go, it didn't even waver when Axel made me smile a true smile. It was the one smile that had been missing from my face the past few months. And I still felt empty. There was nothing that could fill in the void, and I wasn't sure if anything would. But I kept up my facade, to ensure them that I was all right. I didn't want them to worry. If Cloud could get through his mako stage, so could I.
It wasn't until much, much later, like perhaps about another month went by did I start having black outs. At first it only happened like once every two weeks. Then they slowly escalated to about every other day, and it got worse. Sometimes I blacked out in the middle of a conversation with Zexion or Axel. The first time it happened was with Zexion.
We were walking home from buying new clothes for our kids. Then all of a sudden everything went blank in my memory. Later I woke up in my bed with a frantic Axel just about hyperventilating. Quickly I held his hand, calming him down by ghosting soft kisses along his cheeks and neck. Within a good five minutes, Axel was calm and held me close to his chest as if he was afraid to let go.
"You scared me." he told me.
"What happened? I remember talking to Zexion, then nothing." I blinked at him.
"You blacked out. Zexion had to drag both you and the bags and managed to get to Leon's cafe/club for more help." Axel explained to me.
Leon owned a little cafe, the only place Zexion would actually go for coffe in the morning. It was a cute place, and Leon managed to buy it after the battle against the organization. He couldn't decide what to do with the place, so he decided to keep the cafe as is during the day. But by night, it was a night club. Axel and I worked there, we were the main stars. Of course, Leon and Cloud were equally as popular as me and Axel. So, we alternated between weekends. We only showed up at the same time during special holidays, and that was when things got extremely crazy and we wake up with a killing hangover.
"Poor Zexion...he must have had a hard time." I frowned.
"That he did, and as soon as you're walking, you're going to him and thank him for what he did." Axel poked my cheek with an almost pout.
I laughed a little. "All right, silly. You know I'm always polite, compared to you."
Axel looked like he was about to retort, but instead he leaned forward and captured my lips in a soft kiss.
After that, where ever I went, I was followed by at least two people. And as my black outs increased, everyone was becoming so worried they wanted me to stay home and stay off work a while longer. Anger started to replace patience, I felt like I was a fragile glass piece that needed delicate care. I never liked to be treated like a fragile object, especially from the people I cared and loved.
What made me even more angry, was when they told my son without my consent. They told him that I needed some time alone and I was sick. So of course, Xentshi, not one to believe in everything we told him, asked me if I was sick.
"Are ya sick?" Xentshi tilted his head, examining me.
I turned to him. "What gave you that idea?"
"That's what they told me." my son innocently pointed to the group in the kitchen.
Furious, I told Xentshi to go outside and play with Zaixou. I know very well, that the walls of the mansion prevented any loud sound travel to the outside. Without asking, Xentshi nodded and went outside to continue playing with Zaixou. When I made sure Xentshi was well enough outside, I stomped my way into the kitchen.
"Why the hell did you tell my son I was sick!?" I questioned.
The group in the kitchen, Tifa, Cloud, Axel, and Demyx stared at me in shock. Zexion was at his job in the library at the moment. The other four were silent for a moment, unsure what to make of my outrage. Tifa was the first to try and explain when she took a step forward.
"It was so that he won't see you black out and-"
"I am more than capable of telling my son if I'm sick! If I don't want to tell him, then I won't tell. If I tell him, then it's so that he won't catch the cold or the flu. Now you step into my boundaries and tell him that I'm sick!? Last I checked, he has no blood relation to any of you besides Axel!" I shouted at her.
"Roxas, calm down-" Cloud stepped forward.
"I will not calm down! Not when you think you can tell what you want about my health to my son without my consent!" I glared harshly at the older blonde.
They all stood there, silent, for a moment. Demyx looked like he was about to cry, Axel had a face of guilt. The other two averted their gaze away from me, ashamed for what they had done. When no one made a sound, I walked out, still angry at them. So, to get rid of my anger I walked right out of the front door to take a walk. When I was a few feet away from the front door, Demyx showed up behind me, still teary eyed.
"I...I'm sorry. Tifa wanted to give you some peace, she told us about her plan. I didn't think of stopping her and-"
"Demyx, it's fine. You're not at fault." I smiled weakly at him. "I'm sorry I shouted. I felt like she was trying to take my kid away from me, so I over reacted."
He blinked, wiping away the tears that threatened to fall and sniffed. Now less angry than a few minutes before, I offered Demyx a hug. I had noticed he hadn't been hugged in a while, so I did what I thought was best. He grinned and hugged back, almost squeezing the life out of me.
"Ah...Demyx, it would be fun if I wasn't squashed to death." I chuckled lightly.
"Oops! Sorry. Forgot you're short." he let go, still grinning while he ruffled my hair.
"Hey! You're the one who's freakishly tall!" I pouted, swatting away his hand from my hair.
Demyx chuckled, and offered to pay some ice cream. Instantly I followed, nearly begging for him to get me sea salt ice cream. Demyx laughed, grinning madly and promised to buy me the ice cream. But what neither of us knew, was that I was to black out again.
I was taking my first bite of my favorite ice cream. Then, snapshots of my past flashed through my head. First, it was me and Axel at the clock tower, eating ice cream. Xion appeared now and then, but her hood was up everytime. The only time her face was shown in the flashes, was when she turned to face me with a soft smile. Pain shot through my whole body when I saw her face, and it worsened when the next snapshot was Axel leaning in for our first kiss on the clock tower.
I didn't know if I screamed, or if I fell, but I wouldn't be surprised if that happened. I could barely hear Demyx desperately trying to talk to me, his voice echoed. It was odd to me, and just when I thought the pain wouldn't stop, everything went black.
But the pain was still there.
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Demyx wailed, picking up the onconcious blonde and ran back to the mansion. He didn't know what to do, but he didn't want to carry Roxas all the way across town to the hospital. Plus, home was closer. Still holding Roxas delicately in his arms, Demyx kicked the door, breaking the lock, and ran inside screaming his lungs off that something was wrong with the unconcious blonde.
Instantly Axel and Cloud were at the wailing blonde's side. Cloud ran back to the kitchen to call in Aerith, while Axel took hold of his precious love to carry him upstares. Demyx followed, unsure what to do other than to at least be of some help to his friend.
"Calm down, Demyx! He's here, so tell me what the hell happened?" Axel snapped, once he carefully set Roxas on their bed.
"W-W-Well...he took his first bite...of sea salt ice cream...th-then he started having a fit...or something. He started screaming, and then h-he fell. He wouldn't st-stop screaming! I-I tried to get his attention, b-but he couldn't hear me...th-then he went quiet...I picked him up and ran here..." Demyx gulped, barely managing to tell what happened.
Axel frowned, glancing at his Roxie and thought. Roxas may be unconcious, but his arms were twitching. The blonde was sweating, a fever breaking out and whimpered every few minutes. Overly scared, Axel gently ran a hand through Roxas' hair. The blonde turned his head to the touch, his whimpers nearly ceased. But a few moments of gasping for air, Roxas turned his head away and whimpered again.
"Damn...Roxie...What's wrong?" Axel cursed lightly, staring at Roxas with watery eyes.
Demyx bit his lower lip, unsure what to do now. The tall blonde was saved when Aerith walked in, nearly out of breath while she carried a medical kit with one hand. She took a minute to breathe in properly, before she stood next to the unconcious blonde's bed. She frowned a little, gently laying a hand over his forehead. Roxas whimpered, but his head remained still while his arms kept twitching.
"Demyx, I need you to go to the library, and get any medical books that you can find. Just, anything about fevers." Aerith ordered softly.
Demyx nodded, quickly running out to the library as fast as he could. Aerith turned to Axel with a guilty expression.
"I'm afraid...for the first time, I don't know what to do. I knew what to do with Cloud, but Roxas is a different situation. His symptoms are different than Cloud's, and this isn't a natural illness he's going through either. It has to be mako related..." the flower girl averted her gaze.
"I...wait! What about Sora? We could find Sora and bring him here! Surely with Sora around, he'll know what's going on. These two have like, a mind link or something because in the last battle, they made expressions as if they were actually talking to each other." Axel explained.
"That can work." Aerith nodded after a pause.
"Um...I'll fetch them...but..." Axel frowned, casting a glance at Roxas.
"Make it fast and you'll be here before he wakes up." Aerith encouraged.
Axel sighed. The redhead gently pulld the blonde's head towards him, leaning forward to softly meet their lips. Roxas stopped whimpering for a moment, long enough when the kiss lasted. When Axel pulled away, the blonde whimpered as if he was a child and his teddy bear was ripped from his arms. Biting his lower lip, Axel turned and left.
It was the hardest thing Axel did in his life.
Shado: Eh, I kept my promise on posting the first chap of the sequel up sometime in November.
1) Zombie Thing - In Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days, Roxas was called the "zombie" for being so quiet the first few weeks he joined the Organization. I thought that the nickname would lighten up the mood. I hoped it did, because this story would be a bit...sadder than the first. At least for some parts.
Review plz!