Disclaimer: I don't own The Mentalist

Falling Down and Falling in Love

Jane peeked through the door of Lisbon's house; not bothering to knock. His eyes searched the room for Lisbon. He spotted the agent's small figure passed out on the couch. The brunette's chest rose periodically with her slow and shaky breaths. The former CBI consultant watched her, sympathy and guilt clouding his eyes. Jane knelt beside her sleeping form, wishing he could have been there to protect her.

Shaking her gently he began, "Lisbon..."

Her eyes flickered open nervously. "What the hell, Jane?! Mind knocking?" She huffed and sat up quickly.

The sudden movement replaced the scowl on her face with a pained grimace. Lisbon took a sharp breath and closed her eyes, willing the ache and stabs away. Jane placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and, despite her attempt to swat his arm away, she sank into his embrace with a tired sigh. The agent couldn't help but notice how safe she felt as she leaned on him, her head resting against his chest. Jane pulled Lisbon into a soft hug. For a little while Pike was completely forgotten.

"You okay?" Jane asked, his voice thick with genuine concern.

Lisbon nodded but kept her eyes squeezed tightly shut; in his arms he felt the petite woman tense. Jane stoked her hair and rubbed the agent's back until finally she opened her eyes and relaxed her muscles.

"What happened?" Jane inquired.

"It's stupid..."

"I'm sure it's not. Come on, tell me!" He prompted.

"Promise not to laugh..." She warned.

Jane chuckled, "You know I can't do that."

Lisbon delivered a half hearted punch to his arm, a dazzling grin danced across her face.

"I fell down the stairs..." She mumbled incoherently.

"You what?"

"I fell down the stairs," replied Lisbon, louder. Jane bit down a smile.

"Hey! Stop laughing. It hurt."

When the blonde recovered he asked, "How does a fine FBI agent, such as yourself, trip down a flight of stairs?"

"I did not trip. I was chasing a suspect when his accomplice came from behind and hit me."

Jane nodded, clearly amused by Lisbon's story, but hidden beneath his grin was an enormous amount of concern and relief that she was okay. As much as he liked to tease his favorite small but mighty agent (and person in general) he didn't know what he would do without her and he genuinely cared for her well-being.

"So, what's the outcome?" Jane asked.

"Nothing, I'm fine."

"You don't look fine."

"Ehh it's nothing much: bruised rib, a couple scrapes, broken collarbone, some bruises..."

"A broken collarbone! Lisbon, how will you punch me now?" Jane teased.

"This one's fine," Lisbon replied, hitting him jokingly with her right arm. "It's this worthless one that needs help..." She said as pulled down the blanket and revealed her sling.

"Don't you worry Miss Teresa, we're going to get you all patched up!"

Lisbon rolled her eyes, "what are you even doing here? Shouldn't you be at work?"

"And leave you all alone? Never again. I was worried, so I thought I'd stop by and check on you... plus, I brought ice cream. Can I stay?" He asked while grinning, already knowing that her answer would be yes.

"Fine, but only because you have ice cream." Lisbon smiled at him.

She really was touched that he'd cared enough to come see her. In that moment she could have kissed him, ran her hands through his golden curls, and told him that he could stay as long as he wanted, regardless of ice cream. She also could have, and would have, blamed those strange thoughts and desires on the fact that she was, indeed, heavily medicated on those damn painkillers the hospital insisted she take.

"I knew you'd say yes," he remarked in the know-it-all manner that simply was Jane.

"You always do." She retorted happily.

A few minutes later Jane and Lisbon sat on the couch, both at respectable distances. Jane had helped Lisbon up and repositioned the blanket around her so that she could easily eat the ice cream that he'd so kindly provided. In the background a cheesy movie played on the TV, but neither paid much attention.

"How are you feeling?" Jane asked.

"I'm okay." She shrugged, wincing at the sudden pain.

Jane raised his eyebrows skeptically.

"Really, it's not that bad. It's just a little sore. I'll be back to normal in no time."

"I'm sorry, by the way," Jane said, suddenly serious.

"About what?" Lisbon asked.

"That I wasn't there when you fell today. And also about the whole Red John thing. I just... I don't know," Jane finished with an uncharacteristic shyness and uncertainty.

Lisbon's eyes were sincere, "Let's talk about it later, okay? I'm on too many painkillers to hold a decent conversation."

She wanted to talk it all out, she wanted to know that he loved her, that he felt the same way she did. But, at the same time she was terrified. It would be a conversation in which so much could go wrong, too much. Their relationship was so fragile, yet it had been through so many challenges. Often it had teetered between romantic and platonic and merely friendship at times but something or someone always got in the way. It was all so complicated.

Jane nodded understandingly. "Okay, but one more thing. Where's Pike?" The question was innocent with no intention of provoking the hurricane that followed.

"What do you mean where's Pike?" The agent practically spat. The blonde man, now standing beside her, had just divulged into the subject she wanted to avoid. Deep down she felt as though this conversation had nothing to do with Pike and everything to do with them.

The former consultant raised his hands in surrender "I didn't mean anything... honest." Jane added when his eyes met her stormy green ones.

But Lisbon was too enraged to pay any attention; using her right arm she pushed herself off the couch and stood up. Everything she'd felt for so many years was boiling together and spilling over like a volcano that had been waiting to erupt for much too long.

"You can't be happy for me can you? Not even once. For the first time in my life something is perfect, normal, easy. It's simple and fun and it didn't take twelve years."

"Lisbon I-"

"No Jane. Don't you understand? I waited twelve years for you. I was ready, silently willing to do anything for you. I protected you and I cared about you and all you did was deceive me and use me to help you catch Red John. Is that all I am to you?"

Lisbon didn't understand why she was pushing Jane away. She really, really liked Pike, he was a great guy but he wasn't Jane and that was the problem: nobody would ever be Jane except for the man himself.

"Teresa, listen to me. You were never just a pawn. I can't justify a lot of the things I did or the way I treated you, but I can't change it. All we have is now." His voice was calm and smooth, utterly opposite from Lisbon's.

She did not want to fight, especially not with him. But it was too late, too many words had been left unsaid and now they were flowing out of her and she couldn't stop. He needed to know.

Lisbon was yelling now, her voice thick with emotion, the volume increasing as she continued. "Don't give me that crap, Jane. A couple of words can't change everything you put me through. I need someone stable, someone I can rely on. And please be straightforward for once. If you love me, let me know; don't leave me wondering all the time. I- damn it Jane, I love you," she screamed.

"I love you too." He yelled over her.

"Do you really?" The agent whispered, as if she didn't quite believe that someone could ever love a person as broken as she had been, her eyes revealing the vulnerability and insecurity that she worked so hard to keep hidden.

"I always have, I just wasn't ready. It was too risky to have a relationship when Red John was alive and after that... well, I needed time. Killing Red John felt different than I'd expected, I had to come to terms with everything."

Lisbon nodded and kept her eyes trained on the floor. She couldn't let him see the tears pooling in her emerald orbs, she couldn't let the tears spill over. But Jane knew, as he did so often.

"Hey, come here," He motioned to her with open arms.

Feigning reluctance she trudged over and fit herself into his hug. Cognizant of her injuries he hugged her softly. Jane felt quiet sobs on his shoulder and he felt so guilty for causing her so much grief. Jane couldn't stop the tears that threatened to fall down his face but he wiped them away before Lisbon could notice.

"I hope you know that I'm crying because my collarbone hurts," Lisbon attempted to defended herself but Jane could tell that she was joking.

"Keep telling yourself that... I think you actually care about me," He teased. Jane could feel the small woman laugh into his shoulder.

"Maybe, maybe not." She tormented, rocking back and forth from her heels to the balls of her feet.

They stood like that for a while.

"We're gonna figure this out." Jane promised.

"I know." She whispered, as an overwhelming feeling of contentment finally settled into her chest.

A/N: I hope you enjoyed it! I really appreciate reviews *wink. wink*