Gods, what did we do to deserve this? Apollo thought bleakly as he took up his quiver, placing it over his shoulder. Grasping his bow, he set out for the island of Crete, his face set in a stern expression that did not match the pain in his eyes.
--
Artemis smiled as she darted through the trees, drawn to her brother's presence. She had just left Orion, having run with him in a day long hunt. Her eyes sparkled and her thoughts could only be described as, well, giddy.
Apollo stood on the beach, just outside of the forest's edge, watching the sea as he waited for her. Artemis slowed as she saw his face, stern in reproach, and frowned.
"What do you want, brother, with such an angry face?" she asked warily, and Apollo sighed as he turned to face her.
"Artemis," he began, "This has got to stop."
"What has to?"
"You and Orion." Apollo held her gaze, his far seeing eyes steady in their resolve. Artemis thought that she saw something else behind that resolve, but anger soon clouded her vision.
"Why?" she snarled. "What is wrong about it, my virile brother?"
Apollo winced slightly before answering. "You know why, Artemis. You are a virgin goddess- by choice!- and you know that you will become mortal, that you will die should you lie with a man."
Artemis stared at her brother, her eyes steady in their own resolve. "Orion is a mortal," she whispered, "And I know that Zeus will not permit him to become a god, not after Tithonos. Therefore we will be mortals together."
Apollo sighed, closing his eyes. He had not wanted her to answer him like this; he had hoped that Artemis, the great hater of men and masculinity, would have been able to overcome the forbidden lust within her. But it appeared that even she was not immune to it.
"Are you sure?" he whispered, opening his eyes. She nodded, holding his gaze with fierce eyes.
"Then," Apollo began, the words barely making it out of his dry mouth. "I guess… I suppose there is really no other way." He looked out over the sea, his eyes settling on a dark speck across the horizon. "Do you see that dark mark, over to the east? Hit it, and I will not stand between you and Orion, even if it does mean that I must watch you die."
Artemis looked at him, her heart saddened at the thought of loosing her twin, but gladdened beyond belief at the promise of being with Orion. She drew her bow and selected a silver arrow.
"Right there?" she asked pointing. Apollo nodded, his eyes not leaving the mark. Artemis sighted on the mark and, pulling the arrow back, let it fly. Apollo watched it sail over the water, skimming the waves as it came upon its target, sinking itself in the victim's neck. He closed his eyes, the only one to see the death of the great hunter Orion.
"Apollo," Artemis asked softly, suddenly feeling a wave of pain and sadness. "What did I just hit?"
"You never could see as far, could you?" he whispered softly, his eyes sad as he turned to face his twin. "You hit Orion Artemis."
Artemis did not scream; she only sank to the ground, her eyes dull as tears poured out. Apollo stepped towards her, his arm outstretched to offer her comfort.
"Get away from me," she said hoarsely. "Get AWAY!" Apollo opened his mouth, trying to explain himself, then just shook his head and turned away.
"Mother is on Delos," he told her softly before running through the forest, heading for where his golden chariot and horses stood, waiting to take him far away, where he could grieve and repent for his betrayal of his sister.
Artemis remained on her knees, staring at the bow in her hands. Her heart felt as if it had been torn to pieces and shoved back into her chest. She could not move, and after her outburst at Apollo, she could not speak. It was only later, when she heard the wailing of mourning, that she roused herself and made for her own chariot, which she directed to the island of Delos.
--
Hebe sighed as she looked over at Persephone.
"Eros has been at it again," she said to her friend's questioning look. "He hit Artemis."
"No!" came Persephone's startled response, her eyes wide. It was one thing to hit Hades- which, she thought, had ended quite well- but it an entirely other matter to hit a virgin goddess with a lust arrow. "Does Apollo know?"
"I don't think so," Hebe mused, "But he did make sure that Artemis remains a goddess." Both of them then shook their heads in silent acknowledgement of the pain the golden god had gone through to protect his silver sister.
They walked away, Perspehone helping Hebe carry the ambrosia and nectar, and neither noticed the taunt figure of Apollo paused in the shadows by the other door, his eyes flashing in terrible anger.
--
Hades urged his black steeds on, worry adding more lines and crags to his angular face. A god might die tonight, and, if the Fates were correct, it would be Eros at the hands of Apollo.
As the preserver of the balance between the living and the dead, and one of the preservers of the balance between chaos and order, the dark lord of the Underworld was charged with making sure that the gods did not kill one another. And as much as he wanted to see Eros get his due, he also did not want to see Apollo eternally punished for rash behaviour.
--
The gods and goddesses of Olympos reclined in the great megaron, waiting for the ambrosia and nectar to be served. The twins were missing, as was their mother, but that was nothing new and nothing remarked upon. Eros was within his mother's sight- as always- and flitted from young goddess to young goddess. They all giggled prettily when he spoke to them and watched with longing eyes when he moved on.
"EROS!" Thunder upon bronze, tempered with the hissing of cooling metal, rang out through the halls, and the Olympians all stopped.
Apollo strode into the hall, his eyes flashing with terrible anger and power, his face stern in its fury. He held his bow, drawn, in his hands with a golden, barbed arrow notched. Everyone stood slowly as he stood at the end of the hall, his power radiating forcefully around him.
Apollo had commanded the attention of all the gods in this manner once before, when he had first made his way to Olympos, full of young vigor and anger at Hera. Then Leto had calmed her powerful son, soothing his anger, but she was not here now.
"What were you thinking?" Apollo thundered, staring at the pale love god. Eros began to stammer out an answer, and Aphrodite began to rush to her son's side.
"HOLD!" Apollo ordered, and Aphrodite froze, her eyes wide. "He must learn to take responsibility for his own actions!" The furious god turned his gaze back to the younger god and repeated his question: "What were you thinking when you struck Artemis?"
"Apollo," Zeus rumbled warningly, his fingers twitching as he searched for his thunder bolts.
"Answer me!" Apollo shouted, drawing the bow taunt and ignoring his father. Eros squeaked, jumping back some.
"I… I don't know!" he stammered. "She was always so angry and mean! I thought she would lighten up!" Apollo's face darkened more, and Eros trembled even harder.
"Did you ever think about what would have happened had she lain with him?" Apollo hissed. Eros' eyes widened as he realised his mistake. Zeus had found his thunderbolts by now and held them, ready to stop his son.
"Apollo!" a strong, yet foreboding, voice rang out, and they all turned to face the newcomer. Hades stood behind Apollo, his dark eyes understanding, but sharp in reprimand.
"Apollo," he said again, "Lower your bow. You've driven your point across." Apollo regarded him steadily, anger still flaring in his eyes and his bow still aimed at the hapless love god.
"I too," Hades continued, "Would love nothing more than to see Eros brought down to an acceptable level. But," he said sharply, "This is not the proper way. How will you be of any help to your sister when you must suffer eternal penance for killing a god?"
Apollo turned to face Eros, sneering at the panic stricken god. With one fluid motion he lowered his bow, returning it and the arrow to his quiver. He then turned on his heel and left the room.
"Fine," he snarled softly as he passed lord of the dead, who sighed inwardly in relief.
The room was silent for a few moments after Apollo's departure, but the shocked quiet was broken by Aphrodite running forward to envelope her son in her arms, cradling him against her chest.
"My poor baby!" she sobbed. "Zeus! Do something about that … that god!" she hissed.
Zeus only sighed and looked over at his brother, who shrugged.
"No Aphrodite, I will not. Eros overstepped his bounds when hitting Artemis, and while it was far more drastic than I would have preferred, Apollo's punishment was fitting." Zeus regarded the open mouthed love goddess and her terrified son with a solemn gaze. Hera then leaned over, a rare smile on her regal face. She whispered something to Zeus, who also broke out in a smile. She then turned her gaze to Hades, who felt despair creeping in. This was why he never came up to Olympos.
"In fact," Zeus continued, grinning. "Both of you owe Hades a great deal of thanks for saving Eros. I would think that helping him and Demeter get along would be a splendid way of thanking him."
"No!" Demeter shrieked, pulling her daughter close to her. "I will never get along with that god!" Hades sighed, nodded to his wife, and left.
Sometimes, he wondered why he even bothered.
--
Leto alighted on Delos, sighing as she walked over to her daughter.
"I cannot find him," she complained, and Artemis shrugged.
"Why do you want to?"
Leto regarded her child with kind eyes. "Apollo is my son, just as you are my daughter. What kind of mother would I be not to care for him as I care for you?"
Artemis frowned, and Leto saw the beginnings of another tirade against Apollo's treachery.
"He was only trying to protect you," she said softly, and the tirade died on the moon goddess' lips. Artemis only sighed, shrugged, and looked out over the sea.
"Delos is sad," Leto said, changing the subject. "I can hear her sighing at night."
"She misses him," Artemis replied in a monotone voice. "It is his light that makes her flowers grow, that gives warmth to this rock in the middle of the sea."
"I know," Leto sighed. "And he is staying away, to give you your space."
"Well," Artemis rose and turned to her mother. "The island has given me a respite, and I would be rude not to return the gift. Let's go to Ephesus."
Leto smiled and nodded, following her daughter to the silver chariot with its stags. The two were soon gone, speeding towards Artemis' great city across the sea.
Delos waited patiently, knowing that her god would arrive once the silver goddess and her mother arrived at their destination.
--
Apollo directed his chariot to the small island, landing in a glade open only to him. Delos sent up brilliant flowers as he stepped down, and the scent they gave off enveloped him in a pleasant cloud. He smiled weakly, thanking the island for trying to cheer him up. Delos giggled in happiness, filled with joy at having the golden god on her shores once again.
Apollo, however, was not filled with the same joy. His heart was still burdened by the trick he had had to pull on Artemis, and anger still smoldered in his breast against Eros. However, he had promised Hades that he would not attack the love god again, and he would hold to that promise.
He would just have to stay away from Olympos for awhile.
--
It had been two months since the death of Orion, and the twins still had yet to return to Olympos. Fed up with their behaviour, Zeus sent Iris and Hermes out to Artemis and Apollo respectively, and the messengers carried orders that the twins were to return.
Evasive as always, Hermes failed to mention to Apollo that Artemis was also ordered to return, and Artemis never asked Iris if Apollo would be there, so Iris never told her. There was to be a council of the gods, and even Hades and his Queen, who had returned to the Underworld a month ago, would be there.
In the face of such orders, neither twin, loath as they were to leave the sanctity and security of their island and city, reluctantly agreed to attend.
--
Artemis arrived first, and she was greeted enthusiastically by Hebe and a regal Persephone. Iris, upon hearing the commotion, also joined in the reunion.
"How are you?" Persephone asked after hugging Artemis in welcome. The silver goddess shrugged, and the three other goddesses sighed.
"Well, it was a love arrow," Hebe sighed, and Artemis looked at her sharply. However, only Persephone noticed the change in Artemis' gaze.
"And you know how those are," muttered Iris. Artemis' eyes began to flash, and Persephone turned to her friends.
"While I help Artemis get ready, can you go and make sure that Hades has not run off?" she asked Iris, suddenly looking concerned. "He kept trying to find an excuse not to come, and if he's managed to head back to the Underworld, Father is going to loose it."
Both Hebe and Iris laughed, remembering the last council, when Hades 'accidentally' forgot to tell Thanatos an important piece of information and had failed to return after going back to the Underworld.
"I'll find him," Iris promised, and Hebe nodded.
"And I'll help!" Hebe chimed in. The two then ran off, giggling and laughing.
Persephone turned to Artemis, who was looking even angrier than before.
"Don't even think of chasing after Eros with your bow," she ordered, and Artemis opened her mouth to protest. "Apollo already tried it, and Hades had to threaten him with eternal punishment."
"What?" Artemis demanded, shocked out of her anger.
"He overheard Hebe and I talking about how he had hit you with one of his arrows," Persephone sighed, "And he lost it. Mother said she hasn't seen anyone so angry before, not since-"
"Not since when he arrived on Olympos," Artemis finished, her voice subdued. "Mother told me about it."
"And Leto was not here," Persephone said. "Apollo almost killed Eros; he was so angry that Eros had not thought about what would happen if you, a virgin goddess, were to lie with a man."
"He's such a good brother at times," Artemis whispered, staring off into space, remembering how she had screamed at him to get away from her and how she had refused to see him for two months- the longest amount of time the twins had been apart. No wonder she had been feeling so out of it; she had been suffering from heartache and missing her other half.
"Yeah," Persephone smiled. "Now come, let's get you ready."
--
"No, I have no intentions whatsoever of escaping," Hades sighed, looking down at the earnest young goddesses before him.
"Positive?" giggled Hebe, and Iris' eyes glinted with mischief.
"If you two stay here any longer, then yes," Hades threatened, rubbing his temples. Why, why him? He groaned inwardly. Why did he have eternally cheerful fools for relatives?
The two goddesses took the hint and ran off, waving at Hermes as they departed the courtyard.
"Man, Apollo's got something up his butt," Hermes groaned, flopping down beside his uncle. Hades only raised an eyebrow, trying not to groan. Why? Why him?
"Said we'd have to take the long route," Hermes continued, apparently unaware of the dark god's unease. "That way we wouldn't upset Artemis. Pssh. She should be over that now, yeah?"
"Trying being hit by one of those damn arrows," Apollo snarled as he stalked past the courtyard. He nodded sharply at Hades and then disappeared from their sight.
Hermes had the grace to look embarrassed as he turned to his uncle. "I put my foot in my mouth there, didn't I?"
"As always," Hades sighed. He then caught sight of Persephone and Iris, who was leading the Queen of the Underworld. Relieved at a chance to remove himself from the courtyard, he stood and looked down at Hermes, who was adjusting his winged sandals. "I'll see you at the council nephew."
"See ya!" Hermes waved, cheerful once more, and Hades made his escape, trying not to let his relief show. Persephone, taking her husband's arm, tried not to laugh.
After the rulers of the Underworld had departed, Iris flopped next to Hermes.
"All set?" she asked, and her fellow messenger chuckled deep in his throat.
"Oh, how I am going to enjoy this," he laughed, and Iris giggled along with him.
--
Artemis snarled inwardly as she looked around. What had Iris said, go left then right, right again, left and then…? The messenger goddess had spoken so fast, it had been hard to decipher what had been said.
She then stopped, hearing light, alluring laughter that could only belong to one god: Eros.
Artemis paused, thinking over her options. She had promised Persephone that she would not attack or threaten to kill the love god (dire consequences had been promised for forcing more work upon Hades), but this did not mean that she could not confront him (sans arrows and bow of course) and scare the living daylights out of him.
Grinning savagely to herself, Artemis began to stalk the son of Aphrodite.
--
Apollo was storming towards the council room when he suddenly heard a squeal that sounded vaguely familiar. He stopped and stood there for a moment, grinning broadly when he remembered when he last heard it.
The squeal was the sound of pure terror being wrung from Eros' throat.
The golden god then turned around, following the sound to see who had managed to scare the love god just that much. He wanted to thank them, as well as see whatever they had done to scare Aphrodite's precious son.
When he arrived at the source of the sound, he found Eros crouching on a high shelf, looking down at none other than the silver goddess of the hunt. The love god was begging for forgiveness, his life, you name it, so fast that Apollo could not make out the words.
"But Apollo already got me for this!" Eros suddenly wailed.
"So?" Artemis hissed, her voice angry despite the enjoyment that radiated off of her. "We still have not discussed when you hit him with an arrow to make him fall in love with Daphne."
Apollo stood there, in awe, as Eros burst into tears. Artemis turned a bit, and he could see her smile broadly. She saw him then and turned abruptly.
The twins stared at one another, silent, until suddenly Artemis ran forward and enveloped her younger brother in a hug. He hugged her back, swinging her around.
"I'm so sorry," she sobbed, "I never meant to be so mean to you, and it was all Eros' fault, and-"
"It's okay, it's okay," Apollo laughed, though he too was crying. "It's over now, right?"
Artemis released her golden brother and smiled impishly through her tears. "Part of it, at least." The twins then grinned simultaneously and looked up at Eros, who had been planning a daring escape. The love god groaned and crouched down again, unable to leave the enclosed garden in which they were.
--
"Where are those two?" Zeus thundered, his patience worn through. Hades shrugged and refrained from asking if he could leave since the divine twins were clearly not present and thus the council meeting could not take place.
"We brought them," Hermes and Iris chimed together, their expressions innocent and devoid of any admission of wrong doing.
"Those two are not the only ones missing," Aphrodite wailed, her attendant having finally returned after looking for Eros. "My baby boy is not here! Those two must have done something to him!"
Hades sighed, rolling his eyes, and Zeus groaned as he rested his head in his hands.
"Umm, Father?" a small voice rang out. The assembled gods all looked over to see Hebe standing in the doorway.
"Yes child?" Zeus asked, weary.
"I heard lyre music down the hall from the lesser garden, and I think it is Apollo. I think Artemis is with him too." She bobbed a quiet bow, and Hades wondered why he had to deal with the cheerful and annoying Hebe earlier when clearly she knew how to be quiet and intelligent.
"Thank you," Zeus said, rising. "Hades, Poseidon, Hera, please come with me."
"I am coming too!" Aphrodite announced, striding towards the king of the gods. "Who knows what they have done to my baby boy!"
A snicker slipped out from behind someone's lips, and Hades turned towards the sound. The god nearest him was Hera, whose face was full of mirth and sardonic enjoyment.
"Did you just snicker sister?" he asked, shocked; when had Hera started snickering? Hera only smiled a little broader, then turned to take her husband's arm as they lead the other three gods out of the council room. Hades shook his head and followed them, leaving Poseidon to placate the furious Aphrodite.
As they drew closer to the lesser garden, which was located in the innermost area of a frequently unused portion of Olympos, singing could be heard. Hades, however, was having trouble discerning the words due to Aphrodite's angry mutterings. He had glanced back at Poseidon earlier, to see how the sea god was handling the irate goddess, and Poseidon had given him a look that could only be described as a frantic plea for help. Hades' eyes had widened (in fear!) and he gave his middle brother a quick shake of his head.
Soon, however, the words became clear.
What do you do with a scheming Eros, what do you do with a scheming Eros,
What do you do with a scheming Eros, early in the morning?
And then a higher voice chimed in:
Tickle his belly with a rusty sword, tickle his belly with a rusty sword,
Tickle his belly with a rusty sword, early in the morning!
What do you do with a scheming Eros, what do you do with a scheming Eros,
What do you do with a scheming Eros, early in the morning?
Which was then answered by the first voice:
Toss him in Tartarus until he's learned, toss him in Tartarus until he's learned,
Toss him in Tartarus until he's learned, early in the morning!
What do you do with a scheming Eros, what do you do with a scheming Eros,
What do you do with a scheming Eros, early in the morning?
At this point the song was interrupted by Aphrodite running forward, calling out,
"Oh my poor, poor baby! What have those terrible twins done to you?"
This, of course, was followed by snickers from the two singers. Hera grinned even more broadly, and both Zeus and Poseidon laughed quietly. Hades smiled, but kept his laughter to himself (though through a great deal of willpower); he did, after all, have a reputation to consider.
When the four gods entered the lesser garden, Aphrodite was helping her son down from his perch on a high shelf, and the twins were trying to control their giggles and snickers. This, however, proved impossible as soon as Eros had landed beside his mother, and she enveloped him in her arms, pressing his head against her large breasts.
"My poor baby!" she cooed again, and Eros, for his part, tried to extract himself.
"So you aren't the complete mamma's boy I thought you were," Artemis observed after controlling her snickers.
"Only in public," Apollo replied, which set them off again.
"Enough," Zeus ordered, only to laugh as well. "The council is waiting."
"Sorry," the twins chorused sweetly, standing in unison. Zeus only shook his shaggy head, chuckling, and even Hera deigned to laugh some. Scowling at the sun and moon gods, Aphrodite bustled her son out of the garden, back to the council chamber.
As the seven gods entered the chamber, Hades turned to Apollo.
"What was that song you two were singing?" he asked, his voice innocent, but his eyes lit in savage amusement.
"Oh, this one?" Apollo asked and began the song again. Hermes, imp that he was, immediately added his own set of lines when Apollo finished the chorus.
Suffocate him in mamma's chest, suffocate him in mamma's chest,
Suffocate him in mamma's chest, early in the morning!
To which Iris then chimed in with:
Run him over as you're running, run him over as you're running,
Run him over as you're running, early in the morning!
Aphrodite's shrill order to cease and desist was ignored as Apollo and Artemis replied with their lines from earlier and then with new ones. Suffice it to say, the council was not going to happen. Even Athena joined in, and Ares proved that gods could indeed survive without breathing as he laughed far, far longer than would have ever been possible for any mortal. Dionysius, prone to singing by nature, soon gave Hermes a run for his money, and the two started competing to see who could come up with the funniest lyrics.
Hephaistos, despite the glares sent by his wife, laughed just as hard as the others.
"Enough!" Zeus boomed, then laughed. "We will meet again tomorrow. Hades, don't leave."
"And miss this, brother? I think not." The dark god of the dead grinned savagely, and Eros quailed.
"Why me?" he wailed, fleeing the chamber with the gods' laughter following.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N: Ok, so Eros is never recorded as hitting any of the virgin goddesses (Athena, Artemis, and Hestia) with a love arrow in Greek myth. But that's ok.
And when Apollo snaps at Hermes, he's referring to when Eros made him fall in love with Daphne.