It was a normal night at Matthew's home. He sat in his favorite seat, the plaid one that his papa had tried to burn more than once, in front of the tv watching old hockey games and sipping from a mug of hot chocolate, enjoying the way the warm liquid chased away any lingering chills from his time outside.

Winter in Canada was always cold, but Matthew didn't mind much. The snow was beautiful, and he glanced outside through his window as the puffy flakes fluttered by. What a nice night...

Everything felt so peaceful and still, and the Canadian savored the moment of stillness. With his studies, job, and his hectic family, he didn't get much quiet or alone time.

That being said, he had begun to miss his family. Most of their talking was done over the phone.

Christmas would be rolling around soon, and he found himself just as excited as he had been as a child only for different reasons. Matthew would no longer rush down the stairs, racing his twin to get to the presents left by old Saint Nick to their parents' amusement, but he still felt that the holidays were magical.

Francis would still be in the kitchen as if he had never moved back to France and all and years of only seeing him through the screen of a phone or computer would disappear.

Arthur would be complaining about how his boys were so busy as if it wasn't partly his fault that he missed out on seeing them, making Matthew feel both amusement and guilt before the Brit would begin to bicker with the Frenchmen about something insignificant.

Alfred... Well, Alfred would be being Alfred. Matthew chuckled quietly at the thought and took a moment to blow on his hot chocolate, because the steam had been fogging up his glasses.

Matthew didn't even know where his twin was at the moment. Alfred traveled so often with so little contact allowed between him and his family during missions.

It had taken some adjusting for the twins to get used to being apart after rooming together their entire lives before Alfred got his job and was swept up into adventure,

but they were doing alright... Truly they were. That's the sad part about growing up, you lose people and experiences, and you must make do and be fine.

Over the holidays, Alfred's laughter filled the house and he grinned like none of his childhood hope had fled him, because most of it hadn't. Alfred still believed in heroes and the good in the world with his whole being.

He felt the pull of the universe and all it had to offer so strongly that he appeared strange to the average person. Strange but endearing.

Matthew found himself smiling as he set his cup down on the coffee table by his chair.

The ice hands of fear soon chased that look away when the dropping sensation of momentary panic took hold, squeezing quick and letting go. A creaking noise had come from the hallway.

Matthew strained his hearing, totally silent and barely breathing. After a few moments of hearing nothing but the wind outside, he blushed at his own childish fear and chuckled.

Honestly, no one could get in. He had the doors all locked, and he had a great alarm system. He also had no enemies. "It was probably just Kuma...', he said softly.

He was about to pick up his hot chocolate when a door slammed and he jumped out of the chair. "Oh maple!", he whispered in a panic as he ran by the tv and grabbed his trusty hockey stick.

Suddenly, he wasn't the collage student that could live life on his own. He was the ten year old that had hid behind the couch with his brother after they'd been left home alone for the first time.

He could have sworn he heard a quick laugh. "Who's there!", he yelled/said at a normal volume. No answer, isn't that just great?

He crept through his own house like he was the one breaking in and not wanting to be heard. Every corner was a new danger, a new spike of adrenalin.

He felt a tad bit ridiculous, but what else could he do? He didn't want to call the cops and be a bother if it was just his imagination. He would die of embarrassment if that ever happened!

Matthew was almost done checking the entire house when he heard a soft creak from behind him. he didn't even have time to turn around before he was tackled from behind.

He yelled out in surprise and fell into the carpet. It was a small mercy that he had been tackled in a room with a soft floor. He struggled even after his "weapon" had slipped through his fingers.

So this was it. He was tempted to tell this criminal he was dead if he hurt him, but the whole, "my brother is a secret agent/assassin/whatever else the government needs" thing just sounded like a totally fake story to avoid being mugged or killed.

Then, familiar laughter reached his ears. Oh that stupid, self absorbed, badass, gun-obsessed, hockey failure, football brute, arse!

"Alfred you dick!", Matthew screamed as his twin laughed thunderously and got off him, holding out a hand to help Matthew up which was slapped away as the annoyed blonde got to his feet himself.

"I could have hurt you!", Matthew said as he snatched his hockey stick up and held it close like a living thing. It was his favorite one which he had won a tournament with. The smooth surface fit nicely and was a familiar comfort in his hands. Once he was sure it was okay, he looked at his brother.

That was when Matthew got to see his twin for the first time in almost a year. Alfred looked much the same as he always did. His grin hadn't changed at all and it seemed to light up the dark room.

His eyes were still filled with joy and amusement, open for the world to see like the sky. His hair was still choppy with the one stubborn strand Arthur had tried to tame when Alfred was a energetic child that could barely sit still long enough for his hair to be brushed.

He didn't appear to be harmed in anyway save for a few bruises marking his tan skin black and blue that had defiantly not come from tackling Matthew. He wore his favorite brown jacket and some jeans, and he shook slightly due to the dusting of white from the snow. He had an eyebrow raised at Matthew's statement.

"Was that meant for me or the stick? Doesn't matter. I'm home early, Mattie! Is that the thanks I get for hiking through your freezing county to see my favorite twin?"

Matthew couldn't help but laugh quietly, but he quickly made a face of a serious nature. "Is that anyway to refer to the hockey stick of legend?" Blue eyes rolled towards the ceiling. "Come on bro, you know I only adore over the baseball bat of legend, stop trying to convert me."

Matthew just couldn't keep up the serious and slightly mad act when Alfred looked so happy and ridiculous. "You're an idiot, and I'm your only twin. I could've driven to the airport and picked you up." He brushed some snow from Alfred's shoulder. "You look freezing."

"I am freezing!" Alfred exclaimed before pulling his brother into a tight hug, stealing all the warmth he could.

Matthew was far too used to Alfred's surprise hugs to be, well, surprised. He sighed in fake annoyance and hugged back. "Get your own body heat, and stop trying to steal mine."

"Stop being so greedy! You're a human heater! Don't let me freeze, bro! I'll do anything!" Alfred squeezed him tightly so Matthew couldn't escape. He leaned his head on his twin's shoulder. "Just be happy I'm home and stop whining."

Matthew took a deep breath. "Breaking into my house just might be a good cause for whining." He then fully relaxed from the scares Alfred had put him through, and yes, he meant scares as in the plural of scare.

When one has a relative doing all these secret missions, the world news gets a whole lot more suspenseful. Every time there was a terrorist attack or a battle anywhere in the world, Matthew would hold his breath until the casualties were known.

And that happened nearly every single day. Matthew had often tried to quit watching the news.

Alfred didn't seem to take the danger seriously.

He had always longed for adventure and excitement, giving his parents and twin more than enough panic to last a lifetime. He had joined the air force at age eighteen after a gap month of mostly volunteer work all over the world.

Yet, during training, Alfred proved himself to be just what the USA needed for a different position. Due to Alfred's job being top secret, Matthew didn't know exactly what Alfred did, but his twin did let details slip.

They had always been close, and Alfred trusted Matthew to keep quiet about anything he said.

What Matthew did know was this. Alfred's job was very risky. He traveled to different allies and enemies of the Unites States. He often did undercover work to prevent terrorist attacks, and he was constantly training to be stronger and stronger.

Also, Alfred had still somehow acquired a license to fly planes along the way.

The first bit of knowledge when Alfred nearly died from a car bombing in a foreign location that his family had never even known the name of.

Fear, reckless driving, hospital clean smell, bloody bandages. Alfred's fake smile and then terrible sobs of survivors guilt. Relief and fear. The feeling that this could happen again.

Only a few months later, Matthew had gotten a call from his brother unexpectedly saying he was in Canada and that they should meet up while he was there. Strangely, Alfred had made Matthew promise no less than four times to leave right at that moment. He had wondered about why but figured it was just Alfred being his strange self.

Matthew had been more than angry when he waited an hour at the ice cream place they were supposed to meet at. Alfred's cell went straight to voice mail. When he had gotten home that night, Alfred was sitting in his favorite chair with a shit eating grin. "Hey Matt! Did you hear about the shooting about two miles East of this place in the train station?"

Matthew had shaken his head quickly and rushed to turn on the news with a steady hand won from stress in classes when Alfred added, "Because there wasn't one. I stopped it."

Joy, pride, hope. The feeling of safety, that anything could be stopped, prevented for the good of all.

In the present, Matthew pulled away to smile at his twin. "Save any lives lately, Al?" Alfred grinned proudly, his eyes flashing like lightning.

"Of course dude! It's what I do. I was just in Russia. It's even colder than here, but I got an ally to help stop attacks between Israel and Palestine. I think even you know it's a mess there like a cheeseburger with way too much ketchup. My boss said I needed backup, but this guy seems to think he's in charge. Ha! As if!"

"Play nice, Alfred. There's nothing wrong with a teammate. Can you trust this man?", Matthew asked as he led Alfred to the kitchen and began to make some hot chocolate the way they both liked it, with way too much whipped-cream to be healthy.

He always felt important when Alfred told him about missions. It required a great deal of trust. He was a bit concerned with Alfred having a partner that could possibly betray him. Maybe he had been watching too many double agent shows on television.

"Nah. He's a creep, but darn is he a hot creep. I think I have a concerning type, Matthew. It's just a huge turn on to watch someone knock out someone else with one hand. One hand, Matthew! This guy is like the fucking hulk!"

Matthew nearly choked on his sudden laugh as he tried to hold it in, feeling the burn of hot liquid threatening to travel into his nose. "That is concerning for sure", he deadpanned and set a mug of steaming chocolate goodness in front of Alfred.

He sat down across from him. "Just be careful. I'd hate to lose you to the "commies" as you call them." He took a sip of his hot chocolate and waiting for the incoming proclamation.

"They are commies! He's a red, Matt! A freaking red! It is my God given assignment as an American to convert him to the way of capitalism and freedom! Soon, he'll be as good as American when he sees how awesome my home is!

Oh little red, with your heart in Stalingrad!" Alfred began to sing Baby's a red by House of Heroes.

Matthew rolled his eyes and took a sip of his hot chocolate. "I'm not even sure what to say to that. What if you take him to North America and he likes Canada better, eh?", he teased.

Alfred leaned over the table to look at him with fake seriousness. "Are you trying to steal my partner, Mattie? You know treason is punishable by death?"

"Only if you can catch me. I'll disappear into the frozen lands where you won't dare follow!", Matthew said with a serious mask that was cracking a bit as his lips curved upwards.

"Then I shall wear many ridiculous coats! You can't escape the law!"

Matthew shook his head with a laugh. "You'd still freeze. Anyway, Francis and Arthur should be here soon for Christmas break. I wasn't expecting you until the end of the week. It'll be nice to surprise them, eh?"

"Yup! We should gel our hair back and watch them struggle to figure out which of us is which!"

Matthew had a feeling that this would be a great vacation.

Arthur was grumpy. Francis was joking that that was nothing new which did not help in the least bit, thank you very much.

Driving with the frog for hours was hell. At least Francis had slept on the airplane. Arthur had not, unfortunately.

They spent most of the ride arguing about the music selection and the dangers of groping while driving. Francis said it wasn't dangerous even after Arthur had nearly let go of the wheel when the Frenchman somehow snuck a hand between his legs without him noticing.

Arthur jumped from the car when he parked in front of Matthew's house, gasping when he nearly tripped, his foot caught in the seatbelt. Arthur made a small hiss at it and kicked the restraint off with annoyed energy.

He ignored Francis' laughter behind him and marched towards the door. Francis ran to catch up. "Smile Arthur! Our sweet Matthew is waiting just behind that door. You wouldn't want to make him sad, would you? And our wild son is probably on his way. There is much to be happy about, non?" Francis kissed his cheek and took the boxes.

Arthur smiled slightly at his husband's words. He blushed a tad at the kiss and sent Francis a half hearted glare. "Don't get all touchy on me. The boys will be disgusted."

"If the boys cannot appreciate love than that is their problem which I blame on your bad influence."

"My bad influence! I'm not that one that taught them-"

Arthur cut off abruptly as the door opened. "Ah Matthew! How good to see you lad."

Except there was something off. The man in the doorway had bruises on his cheek.

Arthur felt rage flare up. Someone had hurt his innocent child, the type that had never even killed bugs and instead let them go back outside. "Who did that, Matthew? I swear I'll kill them!"

"Woah dude relax."

"Alfred, I am your guardian it is impolite to refer to me as dude." Arther was so used to mixing the twins up that he switched from thinking he was addressing Matthew to addressing Alfred without a second thought.

It was only when Francis gasped that he actually realized this meant Alfred was home early.

Francis dropped the gifts without a care and threw his arms around their youngest. "Mon fils! You are home! Je remercie le Seigneur!"

He held the twin they barely saw tightly, revealing in his confirmed safety. Alfred laughed and hugged back warmly. Francis and Alfred were both the type of men that really hugged, no silly half hugs with no warmth. Matthew was the same way at certain points.

Sadly, Arthur was usually one to shy away from hugs.

Francis was trying to fix that, but it was taking a discouraging amount of time to fix.

Alfred laughed and said, "Papa, you know I don't speak your fancy pants language!"

"You must learn!", Francis declared dramatically.

Arthur picked up the presents and walked inside. He was smiling softly and set them down. He walked over and ruffled Alfred's hair. "Finally back from your reckless missions I see. I'm glad you weren't shot fatally." That was about as warm as he usually got. His family was used to the strange way of showing affection Arthur had.

"As if anyone could bare to shoot this face!"

"Bonjour Papa. Comment allez-vous? Je vois que vous avez réalisé que l'un de nous est qui.", Matthew said from near the door where he had been watching the warm scene.

"Mattheu!", Francis exclaimed and let go of Alfred to hug his other son just as warmly. "Of course I've figured out which one of you is which! It is obvious for a genius such as I!"

Both of the boys laughed at that.

"I'm so glad you're both here and safe poppets.", Arthur admitted after a moment with a little blush.

"Aw thanks Artie!" Alfred grabbed the smaller man and spun around with him held a few inches above the ground.

"Put me down you giant brute freak of nature!", Arthur exclaimed and Matthew and Francis smiled at each other knowingly. Let the family holiday begin, strangeness and all.

Alfred always had a week of for Christmas vacation with his family and on the third day of that break something crazy fun happened. Their first tradition took place.

Matthew panted as he hid behind a wall. His finger on the trigger of his weapon. Running footsteps pounded down the hallway. He looked across the hall at Arthur and Francis who were also hiding and gave a determined nod.

It was time.

Their target came into view, a blur of yellow and brown. Point, breath, and "Fire!" The air was filled with nerf gun bullets at their target who kicked off the ground into a side flip and then kicking off a wall just to show off.

Alfred flashed a peace sign to his family as he sprinted. It was three to one. He aimed his own nerf gun, hitting Francis and Arthur with only using two bullets, two perfect shots. He was just about to turn the corner when he felt a small flick, looking down and seeing a red Styrofoam bullet stuck to his shirt. He looked up to see the barrel of a bright orange gun and wide, violet eyes before falling dramatically.

"My own twin! How could this be cruel world to turn the best of friends against each other in the cruel clutches of war! What cruelty!", he yelled dramatically and spasmed in a way that looked like a failed attempt at doing the worm.

Matthew's surprise turned to amusement. "You let me hit you."

Alfred grinned proudly and shook his head, sitting up slightly. "Nah bro. I guess your aim really is improving. And now I die!" He flopped back to the floor.

Matthew raised an eyebrow and looked from his toy gun to his brother.

"I shot you for real with this nerf gun?"

A nod.

"I shot one of the best agents in the US government?

Another nod this time with a wide smile. "What do you mean one of? I'm the best! Now stop asking me questions, let me rest in peace, cruel murderer."

Matthew tossed his nerf gun in the air. "Hell yeah! I am never playing this game again! I retire victorious! I win! I am awesome!" He jumped around with a few whoops of victory.

Alfred was still on the floor, now laughing so hard tears gathered at the corners of his eyes. "Congrats agent Williams."

Their parents sat up from where they had "died" and Arthur sighed. "We'll get you next time, Alfred."

"Better make it fast old man. You're only going to get slower!"

"Shut up you brat!"

That night, Matthew's joy at being good enough to actually land a nerf bullet on his brother had given way to much darker thoughts. He laid awake in the room he shared with Alfred.

Matthew lived in their family's old vacation house in Canada. It was much too big for what he needed, but his family was very well off, and Matthew felt at home there.

It was close to the medical school had had chosen to study at and suited his needs perfectly.

The long haired twin moved around in his bed to get comfortable and frowned slightly.

Alfred had seemed untouchable before this, an expert, too fast to catch a bullet, but now the harsh reality was impossible to ignore. No one could dodge every bullet.

"Matt, are you ever going to stop squirming and actually fall asleep? You're keeping me up.", Alfred whispered and leaned over to look at the bed under his. Matthew smiled at the familiar scene of his brother leaning down from the top bunk to speak with him.

Without his glasses, Alfred looked much more like his younger self.

"Sorry. I'm just thinking."

"Thinking about what?"

Matthew's smile faded and Alfred's eyes narrowed in concern instantly. So fast that it seemed Alfred's expression changed with Matthew's. Twins' intuition it seemed.

"Mattie, you alright?"

Matthew bit his lip before blurting out his worries. "If I can hit you with a slow nerf bullet, how will you not be hit with real bullets? You could die any day and I probably wouldn't even know. You'd be declared MIA and I'd never see you again."Matthew felt like his chest was being crushed just thinking about it.

"Then no one would call you Alfred anymore. Spotlights all yours.", Alfred joked with a small smile, not taking his own dangerous lifestyle seriously.

Matthew felt anger turn his blood hot for a short moment as if it was sparking. "That's not funny, Alfred.", he snapped. His brother's smile fell and Alfred flipped over the rail on the top bunk to lower himself to sit on the open space left on Matthew's bed.

There was a reflective silence between them before Alfred sighed and leaned back against the wall. "I've never lied, Matt. I'm working a dangerous job. But don't worry about it. It is my choice, and maybe it's a bit selfish..."

Matthew looked at him with open curiosity, but Alfred didn't meet his gaze.

Alfred pulled his legs up to his chest, looking a bit regretful and resting his chin on his knees. "I want to see the world, I want to feel good, to feel important, to save people, be a badass. I want it so bad, and I did it. I did it despite knowing my death will put you through hell. I'm sorry about that, but I need this Matthew. I can't belong in a normal life. It's not for me."

"You won't die.", was the first thing out of Matthew's lips. "Don't die and they'll be nothing to forgive. Gosh Al, only you would call risking your life to save lives of strangers selfish because it makes you feel good to save people. You don't cause me all that much worry anyway."

Alfred smiled again but it was sad, a faded version that insulted his usual brightness.

"I know that's not true. You look like someone's twisting a knife into you when you see my scars sometimes, and don't even get me started on dad's reaction to me being a bit roughed up from the job."

"That's because someone hurt my little brother and I couldn't do anything. It's not your fault, Alfie.", Matthew said softly feeling a bit of guilt at how Alfred had noticed his pain at seeing the reminders of Alfred's pain.

He had only seen his twin's scars once while at the beach in the summer when Alfred had a weekend break, and he had noticed that Alfred had not changed in the same room as him that night.

There weren't all that many anyway. There were two bullet scars making two dots there, and there were a few white lines from being cut with knives, but it made Matthew wish that anyone who had left a mark on his brother had suffered in return.

"You're doing the right thing, Al. I know you fight for what's right. I feel safer knowing people like you are protecting the world. There's nothing to be guilty or ashamed for, not even your scars. I just wish I could look after you a bit sometimes."

Alfred smiled for real this time. "I'm the older twin. It's my job to look after you."

Matthew patted his back condescendingly. "Sure you are."

There was a moment of quiet laughter shared between them. It had always been like this even before the twins were adopted by Arthur and Francis; they confided in each other, trusted each other, broke curfew to trade stories and laugh.

"I sometimes forget how easy this is.", Alfred said when he had stopped chuckling.

"Overseas and even in the US sometimes, I need to watch what I say. I never just...talk anymore."

Matthew smiled, feeling needed, feeling important in a way that all siblings could relate to. "I'm only a phone call away whenever you need."

"Even in different timezones?"

"Even if you wake me up at two am when I have a medical exam that day, just not when my favorite hockey team is having a late game."

Alfred laughed again.

The next day was Christmas Eve, the day Alfred has originally planned to arrive home. It was spent baking cookies and watching cheesy Christmas films. Arthur only set one batch of cookies on fire that year. Everything went so smoothly.

The world was taking pity on them.

Francis baked delicious goods with Matthew. Alfred entertained Arthur with thumb wars and stories of his adventures abroad to keep him from the kitchen.

They had a pillow fight that night before all four of them ate so much that moving was far too much of a chore. It's A Wonderful Life played almost unnoticed on the television. Arthur groaned into Frances shirt with a hand on his stomach.

Francis had his head rested on top of Arthur's with a small smile and a hand on Alfred's shoulder. Matthew had his head in Francis' lap, relaxing as Arthur absentmindedly played with his hair, and Alfred was squashed in between the couch and his brother, laying on his side with his head on Matthew's chest. One of Alfred's arms reached over Matthew to grip Arthur's free hand.

It was a chain of their family. It was connection. It was warmth. It was safety.

Matthew would look back on this moment.

He would remember the way they all had smiles on before falling asleep, remember knowing no one was going to hurt his family, remember how Alfred had soft snores and how his hair stuck up in every direction, and

he would wonder if there was anyway to ever get back to having such simple family moments again without the emptiness that he could feel present with a family of only three.

Christmas came and went far too fast.

Alfred had been playing in the snow with the extra warm jacket Francis had gotten him for Christmas, using the sling shot Arthur had gotten him to shoot snowballs at tree branches and enjoying that the didn't even shiver while the snow fell around him.

He had never understood how some adults lost their wonder at snowfalls. Each one was magical, and he would appreciate them with the eyes of a child until the day he died.

People just needed to remember to enjoy the moment more.

Then, everyone would be happier.

Matthew was inside making hot chocolate and petting his large dog Kuma something or other. Arthur and Francis were bickering outside on the porch about who was the best ice skater before Arthur got to annoyed and started a snowball fight, ruining the flowing, damn near perfect hair the Frenchman took pride in with one well aimed shot.

The phone rang and Matthew thought nothing of it, he reached into his pocket before finding his own phone still and silent despite Wannabe by the Spice Girls being played. There was only one other man in their family with that ringtone.

He felt a bit cold suddenly as he looked at the phone on the counter with the American flag case. He didn't move for a few moments, wondering if he could just pretend he hadn't heard it. He didn't know for sure, but usually, when Alfred got a call that wasn't from his family, he was being called to work.

It wasn't fair. They were supposed to have a few more days to relax and have fun, but duty seemed determined to tear Alfred from them early.

Matthew grabbed the phone with a sigh and felt any hope he had of being wrong fall at contact he saw there. It simply said "boss."

"Alfred, your boss is calling!", he called outside.

"Fuck!"