CHAPTER ONE
David Paden ran his chocolate brown eyes down the passenger list pinned to the purser's wall. As far as he knew, he was only taking care of one rich old spinster and her maid, but there had been so many last minute bookings on the Cameronia that he wanted to make sure. He found his name assigned to a first class stateroom, one of the best suites the ship had to offer. He read the name printed next to the cabin number - The Earl of Grantham. (And Valet.)
In the luxurious stateroom, Elizabeth the cabin maid bobbed a quick curtsey to Lord Grantham, apologised for disturbing him and quickly went into the private bathroom with a fresh set of towels. The Earl gave her an absent-minded smile and waved her on, but his valet stared at her as she walked by. She'd glanced at him when she'd entered the cabin, but now as she past the wardrobe where he was hanging the Earl's clothes she gave him a more curious look. He was tall and strikingly handsome with steel-grey eyes and jet black hair that he wore slicked back with pomade. His suit was tailored to fit him and looked expensive even for an Earl's valet. He wore grey pinstriped trousers with a crisp white shirt, a black waistcoat and tie. A gold watch-chain looped from the button of his waistcoat into the pocket and she noticed curiously that he wore a thin flesh coloured glove that covered the palm and base of two fingers on his left hand. She smiled at him, but he didn't smile back, just nodded his head politely and continued unpacking the Earl's clothes.
With the towels delivered, she quickly slipped from the stateroom and closed the door behind her. Coming along the corridor was Mr. Paden one of the first class stewards. He cut a dashing figure in his white uniform with its red and gold trimmings in the shipping line's colours. He was one of the best looking stewards and also one of the nicest on board. He'd always been polite and kind to her, and although she'd tried to flirt with him, he'd always been friendly but distant. The other cabin girls had laughed at her and said cryptically, 'you're wasting your time with that one dear, he's not what you'd call a ladies man.' Elizabeth hadn't known what they meant and thought that he was simply being too careful with his career to risk losing his job over a dalliance with a cabin maid.
"What's he like Liz?" David asked with a cheerful smile when he reached the stateroom door.
"Seems very nice,' she replied. "Not an old codger like the duke we had last crossing. He looks middle-aged, a bit on the pudgy side, but he's got a kind face and he was nice to me. His valet's a bit of alright though."
David's face brightened as he knocked on the door and entered.
"Good morning Sir," he said with a small respectful bow. "I'm David, I'm your steward, I'll be taking care of you on this voyage. If there is anything at all that you need, day or night, just ring and I'll attend to it."
"Thank you David," Lord Grantham said, "Actually I was wondering, what are the meal times on board? Are they the same for all classes?"
"They are indeed Sir," David replied. "Breakfast is from seven to nine, you may dine in the dining room or have it brought to your stateroom. There are two sittings for lunch Sir, one at twelve, the other at two, and the same for dinner, the early sitting at seven and the later one at nine."
"What do you think Barrow?" the Earl called across the cabin to his valet who was stacking the empty suitcases in the alcove behind the wardrobe. "Should we eat at the same time or would you prefer to eat before or after you dress me?"
"I'm sure I'll fit in with whatever suits you best Your Lordship," the valet replied.
David turned to look at him. Elizabeth had been right about him, he was more than a bit of alright. Standing tall, his chin lifted ever so slightly, his jaw was strong and masculine, his eyes, though not oozing warmth, were attentive and curious as they held David's gaze. His hair inky black and neatly combed back. And his lips, David couldn't help looking at his lips, perfectly shaped and full, the top one arched in a seductive bow.
"Well I've brought a lot of paperwork with me," Lord Grantham continued. "So I think I'll eat at the first sitting, then you can undress me early and have the rest of the evening to yourself while I get on with my reading. Does sound suitable Barrow?"
"Very suitable M'Lord," Thomas said with the barest hint of a smile.
"Well I think we're done here," the Earl said, "I'm sure David will show you to your cabin, and I'll see you back here at six to dress me for dinner." As he spoke he handed Thomas' ticket to David, it had the cabin details printed on it.
"I'm sure I can manage to find it myself, just point me in the direction of third class," Thomas said to the steward.
"Oh I forgot to tell you Barrow, I've booked you in second class, it was the least I could do after you got volunteered at the last minute for this journey. I still don't know why Mary insisted Bates stay at home, but I'd have done the same for him."
Second class, that was a surprise, one that Thomas liked very much. "Thank you Your Lordship, that's very kind of you." Thomas bowed quickly and followed David out.
When they reached Thomas' cabin he found that the two suitcases he'd brought with had already been delivered there and he walked around, impressed by how nice it was. The cabin was bigger than his attic room at Downton Abbey; it had a small sitting area, a desk and a big double bed, twice the size as his tiny iron framed bed back home. Best of all he had his own private bathroom, and there was a porthole that at the moment looked out onto the dock, but for the next week would provide a view of the vast, endless ocean.
Half an hour later the ship's whistle blasted and the deckhands began shouting orders back and forth to the dockworkers on the quayside. Enormous ropes, thicker than a man's waist were cast off, the gigantic anchor chain rattled and strained as it was lifted and little steam-driven tug boats began to pull the huge bulk of the ship away from her berth.
Thomas and Lord Grantham were on deck joining the other passengers who were waving and shouting their last goodbyes to friends and family. They had nobody to wave to but it was fun to be a part of the commotion and noise. Thomas had never travelled away from England and never by sea, except to cross the Channel to France during the war. But that was nothing like this. Men, horses, equipment and supplies all jammed in on top of each other, the floor of the ferry still slick with the blood of the men that it had just brought back to England before picking up the next load of expendable troops for the front-line trenches. Thomas had hated every moment of the crossing and every moment of the time he spent at the Front. But this, this was something else, it was luxury, opulence and fun. A great adventure Mrs. Hughes had called it when he told her he was to accompany His Lordship to America. She'd been right. Jimmy had been envious, and Thomas too excited to care, but now he wished that Jimmy could have been here too. How he would have loved the fanfare, the crowds and the excitement.
Thomas felt the ship give a little lurch under his feet as she slipped her moorings and was free. They were on their way, the Liverpool docks disappeared behind them and ahead of them, only the wide open blue sea, and in a week's time, New York.
Lord Grantham had been invited to the captain's table and Thomas helped him dress in white tie for the occasion.
"I hope you won't be too bored during our time at sea," the Earl said as Thomas fastened his cuff-links.
"Oh I'm sure I'll find enough to occupy myself M'Lord," Thomas replied.
Lord Grantham recalled Lady Mary's comment the previous day about handsome stewards strutting the boat deck and nodded his head, "Yes, no doubt you will Barrow."
Thomas ate alone in the second class dining room, enjoying the solitude of having a table to himself with nobody chattering and giggling the way the maids did at Downton. The only thing he missed was seeing Jimmy's attractive face opposite him.
After dinner he went back to his cabin, had a long relaxing bath and then went up to see if the Earl was ready to turn in for the night. He went about his duties as Lord Grantham shared the gossip he had overheard during dinner, then said goodnight as he left for the evening. He thought about going down to the second class lounge to read the newspaper or maybe join in one the card games that would be going on there, but the night was so pleasant and the weather so mild, that he decided to take a stroll around the deck instead.
The sea was as calm as a pond and the sky clear and cloudless. There was only a sliver of a moon and the stars shone so brightly that they put Her Ladyship's diamond tiara to shame. He stood at the rail staring out at the placid ocean and up at the brilliant night sky. His thoughts drifted back home to Jimmy, he wished the young footman could see this for himself, words just wouldn't be enough to tell him how beautiful it was. He replayed their last conversation in his mind, Jimmy complaining that his plans for Ivy's attention had come to nothing, and Thomas telling him that something, or someone, was bound to be around the corner. Jimmy had smirked and said he hoped they got a move on or he might do something stupid. Thomas wondered just what that something stupid was. In his dreams he could think of a hundred stupid things Jimmy could do to take his mind of that silly girl. Most of them involved a lot of bare flesh and Thomas' hands and tongue.
He was so lost in his fantasy that he didn't hear the footsteps approaching along the deck until the person was standing right next to him.
"Beautiful night, isn't it?" David said, standing just close enough to Thomas that their sleeves touched.
"It is, we don't get many this clear in Yorkshire,' Thomas admitted, glancing sideways and studying the good looking steward out of the corner of his eye.
He had dark eyes and dark brown hair, but the ends had threads of gold in them as if the sun had kissed them. His jawline was sharp and strong, his skin was smooth and soft, but even in the starlight Thomas thought he could see the faint shadow of stubble. He found it surprisingly arousing. David was a little shorter than him, but not by much, he seemed to be about the same height as Jimmy. His voice was smooth and when he smiled, Thomas didn't think he'd ever seen a man look so beautiful. He seemed confident and shy at the same time; Thomas found it attractive and endearing.
And that was the problem. All too often he found himself drawn to a good looking man, misread the signs and ended up picking up the pieces of a broken heart and a shattered ego. It had happened so often in the past that he was beginning to doubt his own ability to recognise the right signals.
David gazed up at the stars but was aware that Thomas' eyes were on him. His heart beat a little faster. He wasn't sure what it was about Thomas that made him think they shared the same desires, perhaps it was the intensity of his stare, or maybe it was the easy rapport he seemed to have with his employer. David had looked after many of the aristocracy during his years working at sea, but none of them had treated their staff with the kindness and consideration that the Earl did. And there was the fact that Thomas had been booked into a second class cabin instead of the dormitory style bunks in steerage where most of the servants travelled. He wondered if there was something between the Earl and his Valet.
"Are you settled comfortably in your cabin?" David asked, testing his theory carefully.
"I am," Thomas replied.
"Have you seen much of the world?"
"This is my first voyage to America," Thomas said. As much as he longed to sound nonchalant he was very excited.
"Does Lord Grantham not travel much then?"
"Oh he travels alright, but I've never been with him except to London occasionally. I'm not usually his valet, I'm the under-butler at Downton Abbey,"
"And yet he chose you to accompany him on this voyage?" David asked cautiously.
"One of the great mysteries of the world," Thomas said smiling. David gazed at him; he was beautiful when he smiled.
"Well I expect Mrs. Barrow is happy that you aren't away very much."
"My mother?" Thomas said, looking confused, then realized what David had meant. "Oh! No, I'm not married so there is no Mrs. Barrow to disappoint."
"Forgive me, that was impertinent to pry. It's just that you looked so lost in your own thoughts when I saw you just now, I wondered if you were thinking of a special someone."
"I suppose I was," Thomas said, his face softening into a smile as he thought of Jimmy. "I was just thinking how much...they... would enjoy a night like this."
David nodded slowly in understanding, he'd caught the nervous hesitation in Thomas' words, and picked up his choice of the word 'they'. Not 'she' would enjoy a night like this, but 'they'. Genderless.
A door opened further up the deck and voices carried down to them on the gentle breeze, two of the ship's officers stood chatting for a moment, then turned and walked away in the opposite direction. David exhaled a sigh of relief.
"That was close," he said, watching them go. "We're not allowed to be out on the passenger decks. Chatting to the passengers isn't really allowed either."
"And yet you risked it..." Thomas said, keeping his eyes fixed on the dark expanse of ocean.
"I did," David breathed the words more than said them. He noticed that Thomas had rested his hand on the railing and he placed his next to it, very close so that the sides of their hands touched.
"And do you think that risk will pay off?" Thomas' voice had become unsteady, he kept his eyes fixed on the starlit horizon as he held his breath and waited for the answer.
"I think so," David said, his voice barely more than a whisper. He moved his little finger and stroked the back of Thomas' hand. "I hope so," his voice so quiet that Thomas struggled to hear it.
Thomas' reply came not in words, but in his own lingering caress of David's hand, and ended with their fingers entwining together on the railing. Their arms touched and through that small contact Thomas felt David's whole body relax.
"Ours is not an easy world to navigate," he said, finally turning his head to gaze into David's eyes.
Two passengers enjoying a late night stroll approached and greeted the two men as they went past. The intimacy of the moment was gone, David's hands were back at his sides and Thomas' went into his jacket pocket, pulling out a pack of cigarettes.
"Do you smoke?" he asked, flipping the lid open.
"I shouldn't really while I'm in uniform but since I'm already breaking the rules by being out here talking to you, why not," he smiled and took one.
Thomas put his own between his lips and pulled out his lighter. He lit his first, then moved the flame to the tip of David's cigarette. The steward cupped his hands around Thomas' hand to hold the lighter steady while he puffed gently until the cigarette was lit. He kept his hands there, his finger's gently touching Thomas' hand and wrist while the flame danced between them, lighting their faces in its warm glow. The sound of the late night strollers returning forced them apart again, so they leaned forward, elbows on the rail as they smoked and talked. They learned that they had both been in the war, Thomas in the army medical corps, David in the navy. Both had been wounded, Thomas in the hand, David by a piece of shrapnel that cut through his side just above his hip. They talked of their childhoods, Thomas' in Manchester and David's growing up just outside London. And then they talked about themselves and the lives they lived in the shadows.
By the time they were on their second cigarettes, they had turned around and stood with their backs against the rail. The light coming through the portholes that overlooked the deck spilled out over them. Thomas had thought the steward was attractive when he'd seen him in the Earl's stateroom earlier, but now, bathed in soft light from the portholes he decided David was magnificent. So different from Jimmy's pretty blond looks and boyish charm. David was masculine and mysterious, his voice deeper than Jimmy's, his features sharper. His eyes like pools of melted chocolate, his eyelashes long, dark and thick, his lips formed a perfect bow. Thomas longed to brush his finger along those luscious lashes and feel those lips pressed hard against his. He thought of chancing it but as exciting as that would be, anybody could come walking along the deck at any moment or glance out of one of the portholes.
And less than a moment later he was glad that he had restrained himself. One of the Officers they had seen earlier came striding towards them, his head turned to them in greeting, but his expression turned from friendly to stern when he saw that one of them was a steward.
David flicked the cigarette behind him, it flew over the rail and fell tumbling towards the water, then in a deceptively professional voice he said, "Will that be all Mr. Barrow?"
"Yes, that will be fine thank you," Thomas said with a small nod of his head and started to walk away. The officer smiled politely at Thomas as he went by, but still glowered at David. "Oh, one more thing," Thomas said turning around. "To get to my cabin, is it down the stairs, then left and right? Or down then right and left?"
"If you'll follow me Sir, I'll show you," David offered and hurried away from the Officer, with Thomas following close behind him.