It Just Had To Be Him
Chapter One: Kanda
Fucking Beansprout.
Out of all the men in the entire world, she has to choose fucking Beansprout. While he can't think of a single person who really deserves her, he can't think of anyone less qualified than that bastard either. He's the type to get himself killed over something stupid and make her cry. While Kanda couldn't care less about whether the brat lives or dies, that is no longer acceptable. When Lenalee cares about someone, she cares about them far too much, and Kanda has stopped chastising her for it by this point. It's something about her that is obviously never going to change. So he'll just have to make the world accommodate her instead.
Apparently that starts with goddamn Beansprout.
It is with no small amount of glowering that he finds himself spending more time with the puny Exorcist. Because she is, and he sure as hell isn't going to leave them alone with only Two-spot as supervision. Not that he really thinks Beansprout would dare harm her (there's Komui to consider, of course), but it doesn't sit right with him anyway, and who knows when that damn Noah might come out? He tries not to think too much about that possibility, because it just enrages him all the more. She would choose a fucking Noah. It's less about danger at that point and more about really, Lenalee? Really?
Regardless, it doesn't hurt to be on standby. Thankfully, they don't have all that much time together anyway (to his knowledge, and according to the various people he has stared down while resting his hand on Mugen in a way that is just threatening enough). It's mostly lunches between missions that he has to look out for. So, when he is free, he sits down next to Lenalee in a way that is not at all possessive (really), merely warning, and Beansprout does the best he can to ignore him. Kanda returns the favor, for the most part. His presence is enough.
Kanda stays silent as he glares at the boy across from him, scowling in disgust as he inhales his food and Lenalee looks at him as if she thinks it's… cute. A mild shudder at that. He is revolting. Anyone, literally anyone else would have been better. Okay, maybe not Lavi, but apart from that.
He grimaces and looks at Lenalee to confirm that she did in fact see the way he just ate that hunk of meat. She has an amused smile on her face.
… Yes. Even Lavi. Part of his soul dies at the thought, but even that might have been preferable.
And now the little shit is actually going back for more. Yes, Kanda has known about the way Beansprout eats for a while, but it's something else to actually experience it. He makes a vow to hunt the bottomless pit down any time Jerry is ever out of an ingredient for his soba in the future.
What can she possibly see in him?
Kanda glances at her, clearly displeased, but does not ask. None of his business anyway. She can choose whoever the hell she wants to. Lenalee must see some of the confusion in his expression, though, because as soon as she meets his eyes she glances away with a small smile.
"I really love him, Kanda. I can't quite say why, but… he makes me happy."
Well then.
"Tch, did I ask?"
He turns back to glare at the table. How the hell is he supposed to argue with that? He probably could, there are some damn good reasons why he should too. But he won't. If that's how she feels then… he can accommodate.
It doesn't stop him from glaring when Beansprout approaches the table with enough food to feed half of the people in the cafeteria.
They are going to have a little talk about exactly where he is going to find Mugen if he ever dares to harm her. Hell, he might just find it there anyway. Kanda is a man of few words.