Anything You Can Do
"Silver, stop." I hold my palm out towards him, and he freezes in his tracks. "No… back up, turn around, and walk away. We are not battling today."
It's like watching an old rerun over and over and over. After the third or fourth time, you just get sick of the show. It's not like I don't know what will happen. He'll challenge me, we'll battle, I'll drag it out to make the poor boy feel better about himself, and then, I'll win. Same thing happens every single time. And I am bored.
But Silver refuses to turn around and walk away. He steps closer to me, his eyes narrowed, as if that will change things. "Why not?"
I had been about to challenge the Elite Four again when Silver called my name, forcing me to stop and wait… slowing me down. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy helping Silver train, and usually our battles are entertaining. With the same results every time, though, I just couldn't help but think him stupid for continuing to try.
"Silver." I sigh, moving my hand to his shoulder and shaking my head. "You never win. Just give it up! This whole thing is completely ridiculous. I was stronger to start off with. I train, you train… we both train. This means we're both getting better, but I was better in the first place." He looks confused, so I try to simplify things. "It's like math. Say I'm two, and you're one. Keep adding one to both numbers… I'm still the bigger number."
Silver just raises and eyebrow, the confused look still plastered on his face. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"Allow me to simplify things even more for you, Silver." I smile, silently mocking him, but he doesn't seem to catch on. "You. Will. Never. Win."
I expect him to roll his eyes, flip me off, retort with some stupid comeback. But he just stands there, that confused look still on his face, and stares. There is nothing I can do to simplify it anymore; at this point, I would be better off just walking away, disappearing into the arena for the Elite Four where Silver can't challenge me.
Then, much to my surprise, he begins to laugh. It starts off soft, a little chuckle, but in moments the laugh is booming, echoing in the tall ceilings of the Indigo Plateau Pokémon Center. Honestly, I had never seen him so cracked up before in my life. All I know is that he found something about this whole thing hysterical.
He wipes his eyes with his index finger, having been brought to tears from laughing so hard. I just stand there, face stoic, hoping to show him how serious I am; he just smiles. "You've got to be kidding me. Kotone, just because you keep beating me at Pokémon doesn't mean that I won't ever win."
"You will never beat me in a Pokémon battle. And as much as I love hanging out with you, we need something else to do with our time. Something that isn't battling. Because I really enjoy hanging out with you, but this is getting old. After a while, winning just isn't fun anymore." I smile, adding, "Not that you would know."
He laughs again, but this time he seems annoyed. "Please. You're so… one-dimensional." I furrow my eyebrows—what does that even mean? "You're good at battling, and that's about it. Seriously, what else can you do? I can kick your ass at anything. Name it, and I'm better."
Oh. It is on, Silver. It is on.
"You think you can beat me at anything?" I repeat, raising my eyebrows. His smile turns into a smirk as he nods, and I just shake my head. "You're hilarious, my friend. Anything you can do, I can do a thousand times better. Just like battling. I bet I am better than you at… well, everything, but for competition's sake, let's say five things."
"Competition?" Silver asks, and I chuckle, hearing the excitement in his voice. "Fine. Then, we'll have a tournament of sorts. Whoever gets to five points first wins." He pauses, that sure look on his face vanishing for a moment. "But we need someone to judge."
"What? You don't trust me?" I wink at him, but he just waves me off.
"I'm not stupid. I know you'll try to cheat!" He sounds accusatory—I know I should be offended, but I'm not. He can think whatever he wants of me. I will win the tournament without cheating! Silver needn't worry about me.
"I'll call Hibiki," I say, and when Silver pouts, I try to reassure him. "Hey, I can guarantee that he will not be biased. He's just as competitive as we are. He'll want me to win because I'm his friend, but he'll want you to win because you're a guy. So, it evens out. Deal?"
Silver nods, and I make the call, preparing our tournament for the next day.
Game One: Painting
Hibiki walks around us, eyeing Silver and I with a bemused expression. A nice breeze brushes around us, making the canvases wobble in front of us, threatening to fall off their stands. I grab my, steadying it, but Silver reaches for his too late. Tumbling from the stand, Silver chases his canvas around the yard until he finally catches it, returning it to its proper spot with dirt already splattered on it.
"All right. You have thirty minutes to paint a picture of my house," Hibiki says, gesturing to the house right in front of our canvases. "Whosever picture is better at the end of the thirty minutes gets the point. Ready… set… go!"
Silver picks up his brush before me, dipping it in one of the paints on his palette. I start slowly, brushing a thin outline of the scene in front of me. I don't know much about painting, but the motivation to beat Silver will hopefully improve my work. And as far as things are looking, I think my outline is better than whatever that glob on Silver's canvas is.
I try not to sneak peeks at Silver's painting, but I can't stop myself. Time ticks by, and each time I glance over at his, I spend too long looking at it—just trying to figure out how he thinks that looks like a house.
"Stop!" Hibiki calls after a short thirty minutes. My poor painting looks more like something a three-year-old can draw… but as Hibiki walks between Silver's canvas and mine, he hums to himself, fingers thoughtfully beneath his chin.
"Can I please ask what this is? It looks more like a volcano with a chunk missing from it than a house…" Hibiki points to Silver's picture, and Silver stutters, trying to come up with some sort of excuse. I just laugh, receiving a dirty look from Silver. Hibiki rolls his eyes, not bothering to hear the rest of the excuse. "Fine. Whatever. Kotone wins."
I can't stop myself from sticking my tongue out at Silver. Kotone, one; Silver, zero.
Game Two: Sports
I have always been a good bicyclist. My mother taught me how to ride at a young age, and I always go riding whenever I can. Silver, on the other hand, is wobbling up a storm on his bike, looking uncomfortable sitting on his seat.
Oh, this will be amusing.
"Two laps around our street," Hibiki declares, and I nod, one foot already on a pedal and my other one on the ground to keep balance. "Three… two… one… go!"
I kick off way before Silver, moving fast and pedaling quickly. I try not to look back to see where he is, knowing my curiosity would get the best of me, but I can't stop myself from worrying. What if Silver is a really terrible bicyclist? What if he crashes into something and gets hurt? That isn't the point of the tournament.
But Silver catches up to me quickly, tailing me. I can hear his panting close behind me, and I step it up, pedaling even harder.
Lap one, done.
I don't hear Silver anymore, but I try not to worry about it. The laps are fairly short… if I can just finish, then I can worry about Silver. It doesn't work. I slow my pace down until I can hear Silver again, his panting a sign that he is all right. I pedal hard again, passing Hibiki a second time and winning the second game.
I turn back to look at Silver, watching him pass Hibiki. He jumps off the bike immediately, looking bothered. "Holy crap… ouch."
Hibiki rolls his eyes, looking at me instead. "Another point for Kotone."
Kotone, two; Silver, zero.
Game Three: Cooking
"Hey, no way! This is a woman's job! Obviously Kotone will be better than me. There is no way I can win!"
Crossing my arms, I waggle a finger at him. "Excuse me, but what era are you from? Cooking is not a woman's job, you sexist boy!" He crossing his arms, but when Hibiki nods in agreement with me, he uncrosses them. "Besides, you said that you could kick my ass at anything. That should include cooking."
"Fine…"
"Whoever makes edible brownies wins!" Hibiki says, looking more nervous for this one than any of the other ones. "Please don't poison me… You can start… Seriously, though, don't poison me."
Honestly, I don't know much about cooking. Cooking for me means popping some EasyMac in the microwave and pressing start. My mom cooks all my meals whenever I'm home, and when I'm away, I stop at restaurants.
My brownies come out looking like poo. Literally. Silver's, on the other hand, actually resemble brownies. Well, damn.
Hibiki takes one look at my brownies and says, "Um, Kotone, I really don't want to try yours." Then, he looks at Silver's brownies, eyes widening with surprise. "Well, those look delicious! But I think Silver might have poisoned them, so I won't try those, either. Silver gets the point!"
Dang it. Kotone, two; Silver, one.
Game Four: Mathematics
"You have got to be kidding me. I haven't done this kind of math yet! That's college level math, Hibiki! I'm so mad that you didn't eat my brownies right now…" I yawn, bored with Silver's rant already. Hibiki tutored me in Calculus after I came back from my trip to Mt. Silver—my mom wants me to "catch up on school". It's not bad at all, though.
"You can take Calc in high school…"
"Well, I didn't go to high school, now, did I?" Silver snaps, and I smile, shaking my head.
"Pity. You should have."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean, Kotone?"
Hibiki clears his throat, trying to get our attention, but Silver is too busy glaring at me to care. "Anyway, people… You just have to solve as many problems as you can in fifteen minutes. There are only five questions. It's not that bad. Whoever has the most right wins the point."
Silver grumbles, but he takes the paper from Hibiki anyway. We begin solving problems immediately, but I know I could answer one and win. Silver has no idea what any of this means, I'm sure.
What is the derivative of f(x) = 2x + 1? f'(x) = 2, of course.
What is the derivative of f(x) = 5x + 2? f'(x) = 5.
Three more questions, done—very similar to the ones above… very simple Calculus, but I still know that Silver won't have a clue. I pass my sheet to Hibiki, and he checks it, giving me a quick thumbs up.
Silver doesn't even bother giving his to Hibiki. He just crumbles it up and chucks it at Hibiki's head.
"I thought you were supposed to be unbiased…" he mutters.
Kotone, three; Silver, one.
Game Five: Singing
"I don't want my ears to bleed. You guys better be good," Hibiki growls, and I roll my eyes. If he didn't want to make his ears bleed, why did he pick singing, then? Silver looks more annoyed than I do at Hibiki's comment, but neither of us say anything. "I picked your songs. Kotone, you'll sing 'Oops, I Did It Again' by Britney Spears. Silver, you'll sing 'You Raise Me Up' by Josh Groban."
I can't stop myself from snorting.
"Are you kidding me? This is the most unfair tournament in the world! Josh Groban is a thousand times harder to sing than Britney Spears!"
"Want to switch?" I offer, another snort erupting from me. Silver just glares at me. "Fine, then keep your song and stop complaining. I'll go first!"
I stand up, clearing my throat and standing tall. I barely have two lines of the song out when Hibiki reaches up and covers his ears. I stop, rubbing my throat… it can't have been that bad… Whenever I sing in the shower, it always sounds fine.
"Geez, Kotone, shut up. You suck. Sit down. Geez."
So, I sit down, completely embarrassed and ashamed now. Silver stands up, a smirk on his face, eyes directed at mine. And when he starts singing, my jaw drops. It isn't… bad. At all. Oh, I assure you, it isn't good. It just isn't as bad as I would have thought. Silver actually makes it halfway through the song before Hibiki stops him.
"Point to Silver!"
Kotone, three; Silver, two.
Game Six: Balancing
Damn.
I can barely pick up my tray without dropping anything. All the plastic dishes (three cups of water, two plates, one bowl, and a set of silverware) wobble dangerously as I settle the tray near my shoulder, my hand flat in the center.
Thank goodness Hibiki gave us plastic dishes.
"Crap," I hear Silver mutter, and something splatters and crashes as it hits the ground. As much as I want to, I don't turn around to look. If I become unfocused for even a second… I am screwed. And keeping focus on this is pretty hard.
"Oh no!" One of the cups of water tumbles off my tray as I accidentally tilt it, and it falls to the ground with a clatter. The water pours over near Silver's feet, and he flinches, his tray tilting dangerously. His remaining two cups of water fall off his tray.
"How much longer, Hibi? My wrist hurts!" I call, and Silver rolls his eyes, his tray wobbling dangerous again.
"Thirty seconds."
I count the seconds, watching my hand shake and my tray shake with it. A few pieces of silverware fall off the tray, and I wince as they hit the ground. But Silver drops one of his two plates and his whole set of silverware. He's losing… All I have to do is…
"Done."
Finally. I drop the rest of the stuff to the ground, the rest of my water splattering on Silver's legs. He jumps, looking up at me. "Hey!"
I smile innocently—or, as innocently as I can. "Sorry," I say, and I actually mean it.
Hibiki rolls his eyes, marking me down for a win. Kotone, four; Silver, two. One more to go.
Game Seven: Writing
"Do you mean handwriting? Because girls naturally have better handwriting than guys, and that's not fair at all."
"Shut up, Silver."
"You shut up, Kotone."
"Bite me."
"Oh yeah?"
Hibiki clears his throat as loud as he can, and Silver and I stare at him. "Hey, people! You both shut up." Then, sighing, he begins in a quieter voice. "I do not mean handwriting. I mean writing stories. You both have to write a short story in fifteen minutes. You get five minutes to brainstorm, ten minutes to write it. Then, you have to read it aloud, and I'll judge it."
Silver and I nod, accepting the challenge. After our five minutes are up, I have a perfect story. Hibiki hands us both our pens and paper, giving us ten minutes to write—but I finish in just a few minutes. When I look up, handing my pen back to Hibiki, Silver is still scribbling away. The ten minutes pass, and Silver drops his pen, looking satisfied with whatever he wrote.
"Silver, you go first," I say, and he just smirks.
"Once upon a time, there was a puppy named Silver—"
"Really, Silver?" I interrupt, staring at him blankly. "Really? You couldn't come up with anything more creative than your own name for a puppy?"
He just sticks his tongue out at me and continues. "This puppy was the smartest puppy in the whole world. He knew every single trick a puppy could know, and he didn't rip up furniture or pee on wallpaper. When his masters told him to do something, he did it. He wasn't like the stupid puppy Kotone who disobeyed her masters."
I smack my knee with my hand. "Oh, are you kidding me?"
"One day, Silver was out for a walk with his master at the same time as Kotone. Kotone barked and barked at Silver about random crap that no one cares about. She did that a lot. But Silver sat patiently and listened to Kotone bark."
I laugh, rolling my eyes. Yeah, sure.
"Silver actually liked meeting with Kotone on those walks. Even though she barked a lot and wasn't very intelligent, Silver thought she was a fun puppy. And that day, while Kotone barked and barked about that random crap, Silver waited until she was done. When she finally stopped barking, Silver barked once before walking away with his master. The end."
Blinking, I try to clear my mind. I don't know whether to be angry about that story or happy—is it a sweet gesture or an insult? I settle with just shaking my head, confused about the whole point of the story and the ending.
"What did he bark about if Kotone barked about random crap?" Hibiki wonders, and I leaned in, curious of the answer.
But Silver just shrugs. "I don't know. The time ended before I could get that far."
Of course…
So, I begin my tale, confident, at least, that I had an ending. "Once upon a time, there was a princess named Keiko. She lived in a small village, but she was loved by all her people. However, there was an evil wizard that didn't like Princess Keiko very much. He was determined to set a curse on her, so he pretended to be a handsome prince.
"Princess Keiko thought this handsome prince was very good-looking, so she invited him to stay in her village. Little did she know that this evil wizard was the prince! So, the prince stayed in the town. Many girls admired him because he was so handsome. Princess Keiko, however, did not like the prince. She thought he was too rude and mean to the girls who liked him; even his good looks could not win her over.
"So, by ignoring his outside appearance and looking at the only thing that mattered—the true heart—Princess Keiko drove the evil wizard out of town. Because she could fend for herself. The end."
Silver and Hibiki exchange glances, staring at each other with wide eyes. But it's only a moment before Silver bursts out laughing, banging his fist on his leg. I narrow my eyes, crumbling up my story and chucking it at Silver.
"Shut up! It is a wonderful story about the empowerment of women and loving beyond looks! Yours didn't have a theme as good as that!"
"No… way! That was… hilarious!"
Well, damn it. I like my story.
"Okay, I guess I somehow have to judge which of those two pathetic stories was better… this will honestly be tough," Hibiki says, moving the position of his hat a little. "Well, uh, I guess since Kotone's actually had an ending, she wins."
Hell yeah!
Kotone, five; Silver, two. I win, I win!
"Are you serious? How the hell did Kotone win this tournament? Well, so what, maybe I suck at balancing things and riding a bike, but I'm better at singing and cooking! Cooking is actually useful for life!" Silver yells, staring at me.
I just stick out my tongue once again.
Game Eight: ?
"You have to admit, Silver, that was a lot of fun. Even though you didn't win, you still had fun, right?" I smile, poking him in the side in the hopes of getting a smile out of him. It doesn't work. "Oh, come on, Silver. You know you had fun! And besides, we both kind of lost. I'm not better than you at everything, and you aren't better than me at everything. So, we were both wrong."
He glances over at me, eyes not nearly so cold. "That's true. I guess you might be better at some things… And I'm better at others." He pauses, his voice shaking as he adds, "I guess I did have fun, Kotone."
"Good! See, we can have fun and not battle. But I think next time, we should just hang out. I love spending time with you, Silver."
A smile starts to appear on his face, and I laugh, throwing an arm around his shoulders. The smile vanishes off his face in a matter of seconds. "Hey, I saw that smile. Bring it back!"
He sticks his tongue out at me now, and I take my arm away from Silver. "Fine, fine. I have one more game," he says, and I raise an eyebrow. The smile comes back to his face, but this time it's slyer. "I bet I'm a better kisser than you."
"Huh? Are you kidding, loser? I'm a way better kisser than you! You gonna go get Hibiki and let him decide?" I joke, and Silver elbows me in the side.
"Nope," he says, and he presses his mouth against mine. The whole time he kisses me, I can't concentrate on anything except that. Is he a better kisser than me? This feels so… right. Maybe he is better. But no! I'm better. So, I kiss him with everything I have, putting every inch of passion I have in my body into it.
And when we break apart, both of our eyes are wide.
"You're better," we say simultaneously. I laugh, shaking my head.
"Fine, I'm better."
"No, I'm better."
"Come on… that was lame."
"Shut up, stupid."
I begin to walk away, looking back at Silver only once. After a few moments of walking alone, Silver catches up to me, staring at me with curious eyes.
"Where are you going?"
I just grin that same sly grin that Silver showed me. "To get Hibiki."
Author's Note: Sort of an experimental fanfiction (I'll probably be writing another "experimental" fanfiction later—just a heads up). I NEVER write in present tense. I hate it. A lot. Present tense is so hard to write it and keep consistent, and I definitely admire whoever does it well. This was a pretty challenging piece to write from that aspect. I don't know if I'm 100% happy with it, but… whatever. XD
Now that I think about it, this is the first piece of creative writing that I have ever written in present tense. Wow.
My next experimental piece (I don't know what that'll be or when it will come out—I may write a "normal" fanfiction before then) will probably be in the third-person. I haven't written anything creative in the third-person in YEARS. So, I want to get back to that. If you haven't noticed, I write a lot of dialogue. That's basically what I'm good at. But I want to focus on the imagery with third-person POV fics. So, that experimental piece will be out eventually.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy this one! (I totally have that song stuck in my head—"Anything you can do, I can do better. I can do anything better than you." XD)
BTW, that IS actually Calculus. I took Calc I and II in high school (but both were college level, so I don't know what high school Calc is like…). It's so fun!
Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon. Or EasyMac. Or Britney Spears or Josh Groban. XD