A/N: The Grimm Brothers' Koenig Drosselbart retold. Enjoy, Read, and Review!
Once upon a time, in a land not necessarily far away, lived a beautiful princess. She was as pretty as pretty can be, but she had a cold heart. Her name was Renate and she was the princess of Waldemar. Many suitors came and went, but she refused them all.
One day, a king named Steffen came to the castle. Now, despite his young age, this king already had quite a wonderful beard. He was quite proud of it, as it had garnered many compliments and earned him the nickname of Thrushbeard. However, despite his youth and wonderful riches, Steffen had yet to find a bride. Renate was the last noble on his list and the counselors would quite possibly murder him if he married a commoner, so his task would be all or nothing.
Many suitors had gathered, to celebrate Renate's birthday and possibly earn her hand in marriage. When all of the suitors had gathered in the Great Hall with the other guests, Renate started her inquisition. She began with the eldest, a man of about 50 years, whose belly had grown fat and his hair, grey. "Well now, if you were my husband, I would be like enough to call you 'Grandfather'." She laughed and continued on to the next suitor.
The number of red faces greatly expanded after the first man. Finally she reached the end of the line, where Steffen waited impatiently. He had heard enough insults today to know that she would find someway to belittle him. Renate began by having him turn in a circle. Her eyes eagerly took in his handsome figure from the bottom to the top. But when she saw his face, she was greatly surprised. His beard was thick and groomed into a point like a bird's beak.
Renate started to laugh. For as much as she liked the rest of his figure, she would much rather prefer to see the man without a beard, as she found her father's to be terribly ticklish whenever he gave her a kiss. "I had heard that you were called King Thrushbeard, but I didn't expect it to look so terribly like a bird's beak. Therefore, I shall call you Bird-beard!" Renate burst out laughing at her own cleverness.
"Of course, but you may want to consider that not everyone will take your jest as lightly as I have. I hope that then, you will see just how terrible you have been to everyone around you," with Steffen's harsh words, all of the suitors left the hall, complaining about Renate's treatment of them.
Renate's father turned to his daughter, terribly red-faced, "What were you thinking!" he yelled at her. "I went to a lot of trouble to find suitable men, and you throw each and every one of them into the fire!"
"Be sensible father, your counselors were the ones to find the men," Renate seated herself at one of the vacated seats and took a few morsels of food off of the platter, "You just think, royal and we're done with her. But I want to marry for love, like in the stories that the minstrels tell."
"Like the stories of the minstrels? Well then, I'll make sure you hear them every night. The next minstrel to come to the gate shall be your husband."