Storybrooke OneShot – "The Unfortunate Disadvantages of Technology"
Time for another oneshot! This one's the first of many Storybrooke ones. It takes place directly after where we left off in chapter six. Hook's been settled into the house, had his nap and meal, but now…well, he's a pirate, so he smells. And not pleasant. So Abby takes the time to introduce him to his first encounter with technology: her (rather advanced and much more complicated than I would ever want) shower. Enjoy!
"And what the hell am I supposed to do with this?"
Hook loomed over Abby's shower, taking in the feminine bath products and lilac colored curtain. Along the wall sat a touchpad glowing lightly, various symbols etched along it indicating their functions. The showerhead itself was the most straightforward and basic of anything in the small space, its large, round surface covered in symmetrical round holes. The man wasn't sure whether his curiosity or wariness was more prominent.
"You use it to bathe," Abby replied, stepping to his side. Gesturing to the touchpad, she explained, "You chose the temperature and spray intensity here. The water comes out of the bit above your head and drains at the hole in the bottom. I bought you some plain soap and 'man' scented shampoo yesterday – I assumed you would rather not smell like exotic fruits and floras." He answered her smirk with a grimace.
"Haven't you a normal tub? With servants to fill it? You are a queen, after all…," he asked almost desperately. Her smirk turned soft as she shook her head.
"Hook. It isn't that hard, honestly. I'll be right in the next room if you need me. I'm sure you can be smarter than the shower." With that, she left, closing the door behind her.
Grumbling to himself, he striped to his underthings, deciding that he'd rather not be left too vulnerable should he need her assistance. Stepping tentatively into the box, he squinted down at the touchpad, attempting to decipher what each of the symbols stood for. Taking the three red, zigzagging lines as heat indicators, he gently prodded the button. Suddenly a powerful jet of blazing hot water shot down on him, causing him to call out and fall backward, attempting to flee the fiery spray. He shot his arm out, reaching for something to catch himself, and his hook latched on the curtain. A loud ripping echoed in the room as Hook and the curtain sprawled in the bottom of the shower, water still ricocheting in the small space. The door banged back open, a frenzied Abby rushing inside. She darted to the shower, punching a combination into the touchpad, and the water stopped as suddenly as it began. As she glanced down at Hook caught up in the curtain and laughed uproariously.
"I'm glad you find my extreme discomfort and severe embarrassment amusing, Your Majesty," he called, attempting to untangle himself. Still chuckling, she knelt down, pulling him free of the fabric. Cursing loudly, he rose to his feet, sending the shower a dark glare. "I will not be getting back into that…that…contraption."
"And you won't be remaining in my home smelling like the pirate that you are," she replied calmly, leaning against the sink. "I am sorry; I ought to have explained better…I keep forgetting you're new and aren't used to the differences between our worlds. But it's just a bit of technology, Hook – how the people in this world make up for the fact that there's no magic. It's rather convenient, actually. Just takes some getting used to. Here." She pushed off from the counter and approached the shower, casually dialing a specific combination into the pad. A gentle stream of water slithered out of the head, steaming ever so slightly. With a flip of her hand, the curtain flew back up to its proper place, the long gash left from his hook vanishing. She turned and gestured him in. "Don't worry, it won't bite."
Reluctantly, he stepped back toward the shower, holding out his hand to the water. Instead of the blazing waterfall of before, he felt a much more pleasant sensation, a mildly warm cascade of liquid pattering down on him. Interested despite his better judgment, he reentered the shower, enjoying the feel of it around him. Turning about in the space, he finally faced Abby, noticing the small smile at her lips.
"Very well. I will give this…shower a second chance. But that does not mean I like it."
Rolling her eyes, she meandered back to the door, calling out as she did. "Of course. But as long as you smell decent, I don't give a damn what you think of it." The bark of his laugh followed her out, leading her to smile to herself. He'd grow accustomed to all of it, the technology laced in the everyday life of this world – it just would take time. She was certain of it.