A/N: I've never really tried something like this so positive and negative feedback is definitely welcome.
'Cause we've been driving so long
I can't remember how we got here
Or how we survived so long
She had procrastinated too long. When was she going to tell Chloe that she was leaving? It felt like now was too late. If she had done it earlier they would have been sad together until they were depressed when she left. She would be a jerk for just leaving and not saying anything. She could say it at the last second, but now was the last second. Beca got out of her car and made her way to her girlfriend's porch steps. They had been together for four years, and now she had to throw it all away to leave for L.A. Make her dreams come true. "Live the life." Damnit, she felt bad for being so excited since the call from the producer.
Her hands trembled and tears threatened to fall as she made her got up the first step for the last time. She looked down and a big drop of liquid plopped itself on her left shoe.
Out trying to run from our pride
'Til you set fire to my atmosphere
Another step. That step was the one they first kissed on. It had been two in the morning on a Friday during summer break. Beca had been dumped by Jesse and after six months of not feeling too sad about it, she realized that Chloe had been waiting for her the entire time. Of course she was a little upset when they first broke up, but after a couple weeks she didn't think much of it. Beca had initiated the kiss after they had just gone on a night boat ride on Chloe's father's boat. She remembers the chill that brought them to cuddle the entire ride. She reminisced on the sky's dark beauty that had showed. They had run out of the car, feet a little damp, laughing, but stopped and had a magical moment where Beca couldn't stop herself from leaning in. That special night made July 23 their anniversary until now.
And I remember how I spent the 23rd
Feeling six feet under
When I'm 30,000 feet in the air
One more step before on the porch. She gulped, water all over her face. She would murder anyone to go back in time and just tell Chloe as soon as she had gotten the phone call. She looked back to her car, a rusty Ford truck. All of her suitcases and duffel bags were all neatly packed in the trunk. She only had twenty minutes spare. She had to get going.
Chasing that sundown
So far east I'm westbound
Feeling like the edge of the world is near
She gathered up all her strength and walked carefully to the door. She rapped the door, adrenaline surging through her veins so it made more of a "This is the police, open up" kind of knock. "Coming," Chloe's voice called out from inside. Beca wiped her face of as many tear as she could, but they just kept coming. The redhead opened the door smiling, but her face immediately dropped when she saw her girlfriend crying so much. "What happened? Come inside, come in." Before the house owner closed the door behind Beca, she notice all the luggage in the trunk. She too began to find her eyes to sting.
The brunette was curled up on the couch mumbling, "I'm so stupid, oh my God. I'm so sorry, I'm sorry..." Her bottom jaw shook furiously, "I only have twenty minutes." Chloe lifted her up from the balled up position and sat next to her.
"Where?"
Beca hated herself for being so selfish. "L.A."
But you'll feel better when you wake up
Swear to god I'll make up
Chloe's tears dried for a moment, but was she was nervous for the next question. "You're not going right now are you?" Beca didn't make eye contact. "Well, when will you be back?"
"This is a real job, Chlo. With real producers and real artists. I don't know," she whispered. "I could really settle there. I'm sorry, I should have told you sooner. I'm so stupid!" She put her head in her hands and sobbed. "I promise you I'll bring you when I can." Chloe was devastated. How could she not have been told this sooner?
Everything and more when I get back someday
This is more than just a phase, love
Shooting stars all break up
"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" her voice asked, obviously pissed. She wasn't sure Beca could keep the promise. If she really got big, which she was so talented it was likely, she may not have time for her.
"I didn't know what to... I wanted... I don't know. I'm sorry," she apologized again.
And even though it seems like half the world away
Things will be better in America
Heard the streets are gold there
Maybe I could fly you out this place someday
Beca paused, pondering on possibilities. "Once I settle in, would you want to come with?" She knew this wasn't likely, but better ask than not.
"Beca, I can't," Chloe was the one to sob now. "I have to take care of my mother and... and my job is here in Atlanta and all my friends and everything I could ever want. Except apparently you now. I love you more than anything and now you're packing up and leaving!"
"I love you with all my heart too but, this is my dream, this is what I want to do the rest of my life. I can't pass this up." She gulped, wishing this was a dream.
Chasing dreams like I'm on Novacaine
Screaming through your airways
Looking back I almost thought I heard you say...
"No!" Chloe cried out as Beca got up and headed to the door. "No! Please, I love you! I need you! Don't leave, don't..." She barely caught the leaving girl by the arm and looked her in the eyes,
"Stay, you're not going to leave me
This place is right where you need to be
And why you're words gotta mean so much to them
And they mean nothing to me?
So stay, you're not what you're hearing
'Cause I've been watching you changing
And who said you're one in a million
Anyway?"
"I know you're amazing at music, but what if?" Chloe couldn't believe what she was saying, but she needed Beca to stay. She knew it was selfish, but why so soon? Just one day more, please?
"I don't know. But that's the risk I want to take," Beca said and tried to pull away, but the redhead caught her again. Beca's mind spoke to her in a clear voice. She was being terrible. They could have worked something out. It was too late now.
'Cause you see only what you want to
Your tunnel vision owns you
Chloe screamed into her girlfriends sleeve as she was being hugged. "I'm begging you, please! Please, I can't live without you!" She collapsed in the brunette's arms and held her tightly.
"I have to. I'll see you again though, I'll be back for you. I too good of a partner 2,000 miles away." Her mascara and eyeliner was all over her face again. Before the makeup could reach her mouth, Chloe wiped it away and kissed her one last time.
"No," she whispered. "I'll wait for you. I'll wait forever if it's the case. I'll love until I die- no, I'll love even when I'm dead. I couldn't love anyone more than I do you." She sniffled in Beca's arms until the last moment.
And you can't see what's wrong
When you keep sleeping through the PM
Eyes wide open when you're dreaming
You're sleepwalking, just keep talking
"Don't let go," Beca begged. "We'll be fine, you'll be fine, I'll be fine. God, I do don't want to leave you!" All there memories, all their moments thrown away. Beca had a lingering feeling that she wouldn't be able to Atlanta. And even if she did, Chloe would hate her for leaving for leaving so abruptly. She would hate herself she knew.
Maybe you can talk your way out of this deep end
No B-plan in your system
Just tell me what you're thinking
The redhead had Beca's white shirt stained with makeup. "Come back, come back... If you don't I swear!" Beca looked away, feeling more guilt than she had ever experienced. "Look at me and tell me you'll be back." Beca looked around with another wave of tears flooding her eyes. "Look at me and tell me!" She sobbed again. "Damn it Beca Mitchell! Just go! You might as well!" This broke Beca's heart more than anything.
And you'll feel better when you wake up
Taking off you're makeup
"I'll always love you," the brunette managed to say through gasps of air.
Sun always seems to wash our fears away
And it's always shining somewhere
I just gotta get there
She pulled away, stepping ahead of the porch they had countless times spent nights looking up at the sky and past their first kiss step and onward to the truck they had slept in many times after getting tipsy together in the middle of an open field. Her heart was heavy and nothing could be compared to the weight in her chest.
And even though it seems like half the world away
Things are better in America
Heard the streets are gold there
Maybe I could fly you out this place someday
Chloe ran her way down the same path Beca had just walked and hugged her with everything she had. "I love you." Her voice was raspy. "I never will stop."
Chasing dreams like I'm on Novacaine
Screaming through your airways
Looking back I almost thought I heard you say
Beca peeled her off and walk to the driver door. Her vision was still blurred which probably was best for driving, but she had to get out of there. She tried blocked out her hearing, but she could always hear Chloe screaming,
"Stay, you're not gonna leave me
This place is right where you need to be
And why your words gotta mean so much to them
And they mean nothing to me?
So stay, you're not what you're hearing
'Cause I've been watching you changing
And who said you're one in a million?"
She started the engine of the vehicle and changed the gear into Reverse. She looked back to see Chloe still pleading for her to come back, on her knees and hair all messed up. She swallowed and switched the gears to Drive. She looked at her most beloved human being she would ever find for the last time. As she pulled out to the road she could hear the redhead scream,
"You're so much better than that
You're so much better than that
You're so much better than that
You're so much better than that
Stay, you're not what you're hearing
'Cause I've been watching you changing
And who said you're one in a million anyway?"
No one could ever replace Chloe Beale. Nothing could even come close. Not money, not fame, there was no loophole. Though Beca's heartbreak gave her inspiration to fame and money, she wouldn't do it again if it had meant she could have kept that redhead forever.
And you'll feel better when you wake up
Swear to god I'll make up
Everything and more when I get back someday
Chasing dreams like I'm on Novacaine
Screaming through your airways
Looking back thought I almost heard you say
You're so much better than that