Soft whispering spread through the halls of a normal high school, in a normal little town, but here nothing was normal to Edward Vincent, also known as Double D and Edd. He was a tall male with a well built chest and rather long, slim legs. He was dressed in his usually skin-tight black jeans, a bright red t-shirt and a short leather jacket. He had pushed the sleeves of the jacket up over his elbows and had a pair of pointy, funky looking boots on. A black beanie with two white stripes on each side was as always pulled over his black hair so only three tots were poking out in the back. A dog tag was swinging back and forth in a long chain that hung so heavily around the teenager's neck it made him walk hunched. It was the only jewelry he wore apart from the two silver ring pricings in his left ear.
The teenager walked firmly down the middle of the hall and all the student quickly stepped aside and some even avoided looking at him. No one dared to stand in the way of the school bully. Edward took no notice of what was happening around him. He just walked straight ahead with his hands shoved deep in the pockets of his jacket. The other student whispered in fright when they saw how the big boy was fiercely biting his lower lip and his entire body seemed to shake from anger, but no one knew that it wasn't anger.
"Hey double D. Wait up" a voice called through the fog that surrounded Edd. The teen didn't stop, but he did slow down as his gang of thugs come running up to him.
"So how is the unlucky one today" Jimmy asked as he fiddled with his nails. He was a rather short boy and had a lot of puffy blonde hair. He always wore a pair of jeans and a sweater. Even though it was a group of bullies and thugs, Jimmy was by far the most feminine male in the school. He knew everything about fashion and probably only latched onto Edward for protection. He was currently wearing a neckband in order to get perfect teeth. He wasn't smart as such, he only knew a lot about colors and fabrics. He was slim and moved quickly.
"Yeah Plank is ready to get started" Jonny said with a smirk. This boy was Jimmy's opposite. He was big and heavy. He wasn't smart, in fact he was pretty stupid and always carried a wooden plank he so talented had named Plank. Physically he was stronger than Edd and could probably run the school on his own, but he seemed to fear Edd in some weird way no one really understood or even cared about, because Edd was often the one to tell Jonny to back off.
Edd didn't answer them. He just kept walking and stopped so suddenly that the two others almost bumped into him.
"Hey say something next time" Jimmy complained as he adjusted the scarf he had decided to put on today. Still Edd didn't say a word, but neither of the boys found it weird as Edd had sometimes went for days without saying a word to either of them. The leader of the group just stood frozen in the middle of the hall. All the other students hurried away, not wanting to be the victim for Edd's supposed anger. He suddenly looked to the side and locked on one specific locker.
He walked over to a smaller boy with a green sweater. It had a diamond pattern in a lighter shade of green over the chest, across the arms and over the back. Three threats were zigzagging up and oven over the diamond pattern and created more diamond shapes. It had a V-neck that allowed you to see the white shirt underneath and as usual a red butterfly was tied neatly under its collar. The boy wore brown pants and sneakers. His red-orange hair was just visible under the red cap he always had on and the square, black glassed was pushed well on to the nose. Lastly he had a black messenger bag over his shoulder. He was looking through all the well organized books, notes, pens and paper for the things he could be using for today.
"Pumpkin" Edd called at the boy in a threatening manner. He jumped slightly and with a fearful look he turned to his tormenter.
"Double D who the heck are you talking to?" Jonny asked from behind him.
Edd felt his heart twist in agony as the boy in front of him slowly faded away and left him alone in front of the closed locker.
"What are you doing?" Jimmy asked when Edd didn't give an answer.
"I dive into frozen waves where the past comes back to life" he answered, before turning on his heel and stormed down the hall. He didn't look back or see if the other two boys were following him.
After a while he slowed down. He looked at the time and was surprised to see that classes had started. Not that he really cared all that much about attending school. He sat down by the wall. He pulled his knees to his chest and pulled his beanie down as he hid his face in his hands. He sat there for a long time breathing hard and tried to get control of his roaring emotions.
"Edd" a soft voice called. He looked up to see Nazz. She had short blonde hair and often wore baggy pants with a black t-shirt and a white tank-top over it.
"What do you want?" Edd snarled and quickly got up.
"What are you doing here?" she just asked, and seemed to be concerned for the bigger teen. Edd wanted to say something mean, because that was what he was good at, but he just couldn't.
"I don't know" he said honestly. He had never really been the open type of person and he couldn't grasp why he was starting now. Especially considering that Nazz was… no it didn't matter he wouldn't think about it.
"Well what did you use to do?" Nazz asked. Edd snorted; strangely enough he had an answer for that one.
"I used to fight fear for the selfish pain" Edd gave a sigh "and it was worth it every time" he placed his hands in his pockets and walked away with his head hanging. He didn't see the pitiful look Nazz gave him.
Edd was lying in bed and looked at the sealing. The house was deadly quiet. Not that this was anything new. Edward's parents were never home. He had found the usual sticky note from his mother, that said what chores to do and that they loved him. Edd had stopped believing in love and family a long time ago. He no longer held any faith in ever having a relationship with them.
The teenager looked around the perfectly organized room. Edd had been diagnosed with a strong case of OCD. He had labeled everything in his room and would prefer to do the same with the rest of the house, but his parents had drawn the line there. Edd had labeled everything from different genres on the bookshelf to the curtains, desk and chair. Everything had its place and nothing was ever out of order, but it was blasted cold. The house, the room, his life. It had always been cold, but not always this cold. The teenager closed his eyes and gave a sigh of exhaustion and soon enough he fell asleep.
Edward looked down at the boy in front of him. It was the same boy he saw everywhere. Edd lifted his hand to touch the smiling boy's face but then hesitated. He knew what could happen if he touched him and he didn't want it to happen again.
"So you have come back" the ginger haired boy said softly and his smile faded a little, but it didn't disappear "why have you come back?"
"Kevin" Edd didn't know what to say "I… I'm... was it my fault?" Edd choked out in the end.
"No" Kevin said firmly and took a small step forward, but he was still not touching Edward "you couldn't have done anything, so stop blaming yourself"
"How do I know that you are not just saying that because I want you to?" Edd said and turned away from Kevin.
"Have some faith in me" Kevin said calmly. He stepped around the taller male to stand in front of him again "you just need to…"
"Hold still right?" Edd said "before we crash" they had had this conversation many times, but is still made as much sense to him now as the first time.
"Yeah. Let's crash" Kevin spoke softly and reached out to touch the other.
"Please don't, cause we both know how this ends" Edd pleaded with the other, but he just got a sad look as Kevin touched his cheek and slowly faded away.
Edward woke up with a set and was bathed in sweat. The dark haired teen sat up and rested his back against the headboard. The blanket fell down around his legs and exposed his bare chest to the chilly air in the room, but he didn't even notice it. He just pulled his knees closer to him and rested his left elbow on his left knee and the right arm found rest over his stomach. His head was resting heavily on his left hand. He gritted his teeth as he felt his heart twist, his stomach turn inside out and his head become heavy with grief. The noise in the dead silent room was poison and was killing the teen. He suddenly looked up. He turned his attention to his desk and when he found what he was looking for; he jumped out of bed and hurried over to his desk after grabbing the upper part of his pajamas that hang neatly on the side of the headboard. He only had that dream when he was looking at him. There was a picture on the desk. Placed neatly behind the glass of the frame. Edd looked at it without moving. It had to have been his mother who had picked it up, because Edd always made sure it was facing the desk. It was probably the only picture of him as a teen where he was actually smiling and genuinely happy at the same time. He slowly picked it up carefully as if afraid that he could break it.
"A clock ticks 'till it breaks you glass" Edd said to the empty room. He placed the picture down on the desk again, but let his hand rest on the top of it, as he debated rater or not he should tip it to face the desk again. One look at the person next to him in the picture made him take a decision. He slowly tipped the picture frame "I'll just keep looking at you and I'll drown in you again"
Edd took a deep breath and closed his eyes and walked over to the door. He knew where everything was in here so it was no problem, but he stopped by the door and slowly opened his eyes. He looked at the boy who seemed to hunt him.
"Can't you just move on?" he said more to himself than the ghost boy "cause you are the piece of me, I wish I didn't need" the teen said heartbroken, but Kevin didn't say anything or do anything. He just stood in the doorway and looked at him with a small smile. Edd gave a sigh and walked through the smaller teen and once again he disappeared.
Edward drove to schools and parked at his usual spot. He turned off the engine and looked at the passenger seat.
"I'm chasing relentlessly and I don't even know what it is" he told Kevin "but I still fight and I don't know why"
"Because it's not your time and you don't ever give up" Kevin said and Edd just jumped out of the car and ran inside, but the teen also knew that it couldn't help any.
"Juhuuuu Edward" the voice belonged to a woman and Edd wasn't in the mood to deal with her. It was one of the Kankers. Three annoying, bully girls who took a sick pleasure in making others miserable. One of them had the hots for Edd and everybody knew it, including Edd, but he didn't find her attractive in the least. There were rumors going around about his sexuality, but he would never confirm nor deny anything.
Marie came running over to him and latched onto his arm instantly and made sure to press her breast against his arm, but it didn't affect Edd whatsoever. Marie was the girl who obviously had the hots for him, but even though she was the only girl to act on it, didn't mean she was the only one. On the contrary Edd was a very popular guy among the girls. Even if he was a bully sometimes, he was still every good looking and was the captain of the swim team. Edward kept walking to his math class as Marie went on and on about herself, her sisters and whatever other meaningless nonsense she could think of. When they finally reached Edd's class she called a goodbye down the hall and hurried to her own class. Edd slowly walked to the back of the class and sat down in the corner by the windows. He leaned back in his chair and kicked his feet up and the desk. He didn't change position when the teacher came in.
The old man didn't say anything and just went ahead and started class. He talked nonsense for about fifteen minutes, before he started doodling more nonsense on the blackboard.
"Right so that is the solution to this?" he asked the class and Edd sat up straight when he saw a hand in the air. The nerd stood and walked up to the problem and started solving it with his own piece of chalk. "Does anyone have a clue?" the teacher asked.
"If our love is tragedy why are you my remedy?" Edd asked the boy at the blackboard, but he didn't seem to have heard the taller teen.
"Excuse me Mr. Vincent, is there something you would like to share with the class?" the teacher asked and the other students giggled at the bully, but went quiet when he stood up and stumbled to the front of the class, where Kevin was still doodling on the blackboard. Finally the boy turned to him.
"If our love's insanity why are you my clarity?" Edd asked, but Kevin only smiled at him as he faded away. "NO STOP DISAPPEARING" Edd screamed and tried to grab the figure.
"Mr. Vincent may I remind you that you are in the middle of class" the teacher said angrily and walked up to the broken teen. Edward was still holding out his hand that had grabbed the empty air. He was breathing hard and tried to get a hold of himself.
"Why do you leave me?" Edd whispered, but no one gave him an answer. The teacher seemed to understand that there was something big sticking under the teen's behavior.
"Listen I want you to go to the school psychologist and talk to her. She might be able to help you with… whatever you are having problems with" the old man said and wrote a note. He grabbed Edward by the elbow and walked him to the door. "Right her office is right next to the headmaster's and I think you know where that is" he gave Edward a small push and Edd slowly started walking down the empty halls.
"Alright Mr. Vincent what seems to be the problem?" the lady in front of him asked. Edward was lying on a sofa and the woman was sitting in an armchair next to his head. She had introduced herself as Katherine. She was wearing a white shirt and a tight, gray, knee-long skirt and her long blonde hair was tied in a tight ponytail. Edd found her extremely boring to look at.
"Nothing" Edd said. He really didn't want to be here, but he didn't know what else to do anyway. He was willing to do almost anything of it could stop the hunting.
"I have been told through the note that you seemed to be talking to someone in class. Someone only you could see" she said calmly "is this about Kevin?"
"Yeah" Edd knew there was no point in lying, but that didn't mean he was going to lie on his back and pour out his heart and soul.
"Would you tell me about your relationship with Kevin?"
"Gotta have one, before you can talk about it"
"I didn't necessarily mean it in a romantic way" she said patiently.
"We have no relationship. We just used to walk through a red parade and refused to make amends" Edd said sarcastically. He had been awfully metaphoric lately. The woman took a note.
"And what do you mean by a red parade" She looked at the teen very calmly and it was starting to get on Edward's nerves.
"You wouldn't understand. It cuts through the ground and make us forget all common sense" he snarled and turned away from her, but it didn't seem to affect her in the slightest.
"Did you love him?" she asked.
"No" Edd answered simply.
"Okay. If you don't love him then what do you feel for him?"
"Nothing" Edd said. He could feel himself getting tired. He hadn't slept well in days and he was emotionally destroyed and unstable.
"What did you feel for him" she rephrased herself to the past.
"I don't know" Edd said and stood up and started walking to the door.
"Mr. Vincent please sit back down" she called after him.
"Don't speak as I try to leave, 'cause we both know what we'll choose" Edward stopped, but it didn't seem like he was responding to Katherine. He turned halfway around and walked over to the corner of the room and seemed to be staring at something or more specifically someone.
"Mr. Vincent what can you see right now?" she asked. She took quick notes of everything she was observing but he teen didn't hear her.
"You know that if you pull, then I'll push too deep and I'll fall right back to you" the teen looked angry, but then it melted away and left only pain and sadness "'cause you are the piece of me, I wish I didn't need" Edd waved his hand at something and he turned away from the corner. Whatever he had seen was gone now.
"Mr. Vincent come sit" the woman patted the sofa next to her armchair, but Edd kept standing.
"No I can't" he said simply.
"Why?" she asked with sincerity.
"I'm chasing relentlessly" he said. Katherine got up and slowly walked over to the teen "I still fight and I don't know why" his voice almost broke. He sank to his knees and the woman kneeled down in front of him.
"Mr. Vincent what is going through your head right now" she said and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"If our love is tragedy" Edd said and grabbed hold of the woman's arms like it was the only thing that kept him in reality "why are you my remedy?" Edd whispered and got up with major effort. He didn't look at the woman, but just turned to the door and walked away.
"Mr. Vincent come back" she called after him, but he didn't listen.
Edward walked down the street. He didn't want to drive home and it really wasn't all that far. As he got closer to his house he noticed the dark clouds in the sky and within minutes it was pouring down. Soon Edward was soaked to the bone. The teen took no notice of this and only used the rain to hide his feelings as they became too much for him to hold back. At the next corner a shadow was standing with an umbrella. Edd knew who it was long before he could actually see them.
"If our love's insanity why are you my clarity" Edd asked Kevin when he came to a stop in front of the memory. The smaller boy was looking at him with worried eyes and held out the umbrella to protect Edd from the rain and the teen could have sworn the rain wasn't hitting him anymore. When he got no reply he just stepped around the shadow and continued home, but now he felt the ice cold rain like knives on his skin.
"Why are you my clarity?" even though there was no one around, not even a shadow, no memory or a ghost Edd couldn't help but ask. He couldn't take much more. He sank to his knees in the middle of the street and for the first time in his life he didn't care about dirt, bacteria and sickness.
"WHY ARE YOU MY CLARITY?" Edd screamed at the skies. He didn't care who heard him. He just wanted this madness to end.
Edd woke up to the sound of beeping and crying. He blinked at the sharp light. He turned his head to the side. He was definitely in a hospital if all the tubes, wires, machines, the plastic moderator on his chest and the needle in his arm were anything to go by. He could feel the wires in his face and guessed he was wearing some kind of breathing machine. He was been walking home the day before, he remembered that much, but what happened after that? He turned his head to the other side and saw a crying Kevin sitting on a small chair next to his bed.
"Hey there" he said softly. So Kevin followed him, even here.
"You idiot, what kind of a moron sits down in the middle of the road?" he said half angry and half relieved as he whipped his eyes.
"I don't know, but if our love is tragedy why are you my remedy?" he asked and whipped a tear away. He froze. He had just touched the boy, but he was still right there smiling at him, still with tears running down his face. "If our love's insanity why are you my clarity" Edd asked and he couldn't help but smile and laugh when he felt relief wash over him. Kevin took his hand and gave it a squeeze.
"You're home" Edd said happily. Kevin smiled and leaned over the bed and placed his forehead against Edward's.
"No you're home"