EDIT: Sorry about the mess that was the previous version. My layout was totally and utterly destroyed.
DISCLAIMER: Sonic the hedgehog does not belong to me! If it did then ;D well.
The title picture is a placeholder until I feel less lazy and make one myself :| Permission has been requested from: ~RenaeDeLiz on Deviantart. Check their work out, it's amazing.
.symphony no. 1, regret
chapter one. hit, hard
Rain falls, it don't - touch the ground/I can recall - an empty house/you say I'm fixed but I still feel broken/
/broken/
/lights on, lights off, nothin' works/I'm cool, I'm great, I'm a jerk/I feed myself lies with words left unspoken/
gonna be okay, gonna be okay, one day, one day
- That Day, Tokio Hotel
" I guess, you'll be better once I've gone."
I wake, my head already pulsing from a pounding headache.
I blink my eyes open, and try to sit up, only to be overwhelmed by a sense of nausea. My vision swims, and I rub at them, vehemently, trying to regain my focus.
My lips feel cracked and dry, and I lick them with a tongue the moisture equivalent of the Sahara. - so, that's what it is. A hangover.
I mentally kick myself for obviously drinking too much the previous night, and slowly prop my back against the hard surface (presumably a wall) behind me. Each movement sends a pang of pain through my skull, and I curse repeatedly under my breath. Eventually, my vision clears, and I find myself in an unfamiliar surrounding at what appears to be morning, the white light streaming through drawn, moth eaten curtains, illuminating the room I'm in. It is an old, small, slightly shabby, what appears to be a long uninhabited living room.
Where am I?
I am dying for a drink, so I muster up enough strength to hoist myself up off the sofa I was lying on. It's a antique looking thing, with worn, maroon padding, and, what I make out in the light, to be decorated wooden legs and wooden armrests, showing through the patches where the material had worn away. As I yank on the armrest, it comes apart in my hand.
"Crap."
I sincerely hope this house is as unoccupied as it looks.
I step out through the first exit I see, my feet sluggishly walking into a number of dented cans littering the doorway. I glance down and recognise the brand of beer, and a flash of something registers in my brain.
"Hey son, you sure you wanna be drinkin' that much?"
"Yeah, yeah, just let me pay."
"Honestly, I'm not the police or nothin', but really, ain't this a little over the top? Since when do you drink, anyway? I just-"
"Look, d'ya want my money or what?"
"Aaight. But don't come runnin' ta little old me when ol' karma gets you back, Sonic."
"Yeah."
A fresh wave of nausea floods through me, and I have to clutch at the doorway to stop myself toppling over. This is definitely not a good look for the blur. I try to even out my breathing, but it's jagged, and I realize I am gasping for breath. Yes, I could really do with that non-alcoholic drink right about now.
I shut my eyes, and count to ten.
When I open my eyes, I feel miles better. I push open the door, kicking the cans out of the way, and am momentarily blinded by the dizzying bright light.
"Well, that karmas getting a good kick out of this, huh?" I grimace and step back, out of the way of the glare.
As my overly sensitive eyes adjust, I make out the round shape of an apple lying on the overgrown grass, some distance away from the front door.
It hits.
"Sorry for bugging you, Sonic. I'm sorry, all this time I was so, so-"
-x-
"Do you like apples, Sonic?"
"Yeah, I like apples," Wink, "What's it to you, Amy?"
"Just wondering... Sonikkkuuu?~"
"... What?"
"Do you want to go on a date in-"
-x-
"Where are you going?"
"Away."
"Sonic, where?!"
"Amy, let go,"
"No, Sonic! Stop avoiding me! Stop running away, Sonikku! You are sooooooo mean!"
"Amy-
Stop following me.
I was running, with the wind. No, screw that, faster than the wind. The wind wished it could run as fast as me.
I was untouchable, unreachable, nobody could stop me. I was the blur.
I was not afraid to hide my smirk as I flashed past a small group of pre-adolescent Mobians on their evening shopping trip. Their faces turned to mush as I whizzed past. I heard their giggling, high pitched girly voices, and I could guess what they were saying, even if I couldn't hear them, in their gossiping manner.
"Oh Sonic!"
"He is so dreamy, I could just-"
"Oh my gosh, I am seriously his biggest fan, ever!"
"-stare at his face all day long..."
"I love you, Sonic!"
My smirk widened. That was the greatest thing about being me. I was unstoppable, and no woman, young or old, would ever be able to hold me down. They just wouldn't be able to keep up.
"SONIKKKUUU!~"
I felt my heart sink into my shoes.
Well, nearly every woman.
There is Amy. She's the exception. Where any other girl would falter behind and gradually give up and fade away when I showed them my lack of interest, there was the opposite in Amy. There was some sort of spunk in her, one that never gave up, and one that never took no for an answer. If she wanted something, she would go all out to get it. And at that moment she wanted me.
I was still deciding if I liked it or not.
"Sonic! Wait up!" I dared a glance behind me. She was closer than I had expected. She wasn't swinging that damn huge hammer she usually has with her, which reassured me a tiny bit, but she was holding a bag in the crook of her arm, and I eyed it suspiciously, fearing explosives. However, I gave her the benefit of the doubt and hopped around, so I was running backwards, much slower, facing her. I didn't stop, though. I didn't feel like another death hug that day.
"Sonikku!" She huffed and sped up a bit, "Why are you always trying to get away from your girlfriend?"
I stared at her, nonplussed. "Amy, you're not my girlfriend,"
She huffed again. "Sonic, but why?! I really love you, Sonikku, but you are so mean!"
"Eh, sorry Amy," I gave her what I hoped to be my best apologetic look, and turned round to speed off.
"SONIKKU!" She screeched after me.
I should have turned around faster. I shouldn't have slowed down, because If I had just gotten away that day, none of this would have happened, and it would have just been a normal day with a running Sonic and a chasing Amy that doesn't give up until the running Sonic was completely out of sight. But it would have happened, obviously, sooner or later.
As I turned, I slowed down, just a fraction of a second, as I regained my previous pace. It would have been nothing. I was running, just a step ahead of Amy, sort of a taunt, just out of her reach. But she was close. And as I turned, she spotted her chance.
She dove for me. She closed the distance. And we both went plummeting down onto the pavement.
It stung a bit, but it didn't hurt. Usually, I would have taken it well, with a Are you okay, Amy? And I'd probably carry her home if she was that hurt. Maybe that was what she was aiming for. But not then. I don't know why, but I just snapped.
She gave an unabashed giggle, "Ow, Sonic, I'm sorry..."
"Amy, what the heck was that for?" I snarled at her.
She stared at me, a little shocked at my outburst. It wasn't me. I don't snarl at her, I don't snap. But maybe that was why she never gave up. I encouraged her. Maybe that was in order - no. No, that was no way in order. "Sonic, sorry, I just wanted to-"
"Wanted to what?! Ask me out on a date? What, you think I'd suddenly start saying yes, after all these years telling you, no, I will not go one one of your goddamn dates with you? Amy, I don't love you. I will never love you. No matter how many times I tell you, you just keep following behind. What is it that you want?! Why don't you ever understand?!"
She was frozen, staring at me.. Little pools of tears began to form at the corners of her eyes, threatening to spill. I should have stopped, but I couldn't help myself. The words just kept on coming, pouring out of me.
"Don't you see? Just give up already, please. Amy, you want me to love you, but everything you do makes me verge on hating you! Just- Amy,stop following ME!"
Now it wasn't just my words pouring. Tears trickled down her cheeks, but she remained motionless.
Hours passed, years went by, and I slowly began to regret every word I said. The horror registered. I regretted them as soon as they had left my mouth, but what I had said finally hit home, and I almost shuddered. Did I mean all that? Did I?
Finally, Amy spoke, her voice high and wavering. "Is... Is that all?"
I opened my mouth, as if to speak, but I closed it again. I... What do I say, afterall?
"I didn't know you hated me so much." She gave me a watery smile, making me eat my words even more, "You should have told me sooner. Just say "I hate you, Amy, don't come near me." You never said. I didn't know, sorry."
I gulped. I was in deep shit now. "Amy, I- crap. Amy, I'm sorry-"
"No, Sonic, I'm sorry. Sorry for bugging you, Sonic. I'm sorry, all this time I was so, so stupid to think we could have had anything going on."
"No, Ames, listen-"
"No, YOU listen. I won't bug you anymore. I promise. I can see how I've been annoying you all this time. Well, I've got just the thing to fix it. I'll leave. You'll never hear of me again. You don't have to run away from my anymore. Sorry, Sonic, I'll be gone before you know it."
She stood up, not bothering to wipe away her tears.
Crap.
The bag was still on the crook of her arm. She stared down at it, and her eyes suddenly lit up as she saw it. She unhooked it from her arm and placed it down in front of me.
She stared at me one last time and smiled again, bravely. I could see her slowly falling apart.
"It's apple pie. I baked it just now for you. Eat it while its still warm." Her voice sounded robotic, like she'd been perfecting it as a speech.
She was about to turn away, but stopped just before, eyes fixated on a spot on the floor. "You'll be better once I've gone." She told me firmly.
With no fleeting last backwards glance, she turned and ran away.
LYRICS/rain falls, it don't - touch the ground/I can recall - an empty house/you say I'm fixed but I still feel broken/broken/
/lights on, lights off, nothin' works/I'm cool, I'm great, I'm a jerk/I feed myself lies with words left unspoken/gonna be okay, gonna be okay, one day, one day
That day never came, that day never comes/I'm not lettin' go, I keep hangin' on/everybody says that time heals the pain/I've been waiting forever/
/that day never came./