Disclaimer: The Characters of Methos and Co belong to Davis Panzer Productions – or so I guess. All other characters belong to me. The song I used in the beginning is from Enya. I absolutly intend to do no harm and I don't see how any financial advantages are going to come finding me.

This is my first attempt to actually publish some of my stories and I will be delighted to get any feedback telling me if you liked it. I also am no native speaker, so please forgive me if I might have tortured the grammar and strangeled the spelling.

A last warning: As this story is about the first death of an immortal in a time some two thousand years ago there is some strong violence involved, as well as rape, although not too graphic. If you think you'd be disturbed by this don't read on.

Chapter 1:

The Road To Nowhere by Zaira Albereo

Pilgrim, how you journey

on the road you chose

to find out why the winds die

and where the stories go.

All days come from one day

that much you must know,

you cannot change what's over

but only where you go.

One way leads to diamonds,

one way leads to gold,

another leads you only

to everything you're told.

In your heart you wonder

which of these is true;

the road that leads to nowhere,

the road that leads to you.

Will you find the answer

in all you say and do?

Will you find the answer

In you?

Each heart is a pilgrim,

each one wants to know

the reason why the winds die

and where the stories go.

Pilgrim, in your journey

you may travel far,

for pilgrim it's a long way

to find out who you are...

Pilgrim, it's a long way

to find out who you are...

Bardsey Island, Wales 2010

She was looking out to the sea, which started to colour in shades of orange and gold in the setting sun. Just two steps ahead of her was the precipice, and way down the breakers were crashing on the rocks. Gripping the fresh green grass and soaking in the salty breeze of the sea she let loose her thoughts, letting them ramble. Let them fly far across the sea to different places and different times. Below her the sea was roaring, above her sea-gulls were yelling, being tossed about by the wind. The wind was tugging at her hair and she too felt the urge to cry out. The ocean – as always – bringing up all the emotions her ancient heart so deparetly tried to stuff away. And still it was the place she felt the most at home. That's why she had come here. Now and five hundred years ago, building first a hut which later transformed into a nice and comfortable cottage. Nowhere else you had such an amazing, endless, nearly 270-degree-view at the Celtic Sea.

This time she had not come alone. She had brought Anna, her new student, knowing this was a good place for her to come to terms with her newly discovered immortality.

She'd known Anna for some years, before her first death. She was the daughter of her friend and housekeeper Elizabeth. Beth. The wonderful, vivacious Beth, who she had come to think of as a sister. Beth, who had died in a car accident three month ago.

Anna had been in the car as well, and she too had died, but unlike Beth she had woken afterwards. She was eighteen, and would in one way always be. Still so young to be thrown in the game.

Beth had known about herself. Well, not everything, but enough to not ask any questions when she would go out at night to meet a challenge. But she never told her about her daughter, and what she would be. It just hadn't seemed right to her. Anna had not known until her first death. After that it became sort of obvious.

These first month had been a hard time. And of course Anna was missing her mother. But that was a feeling she would have to learn living with, like all of them did sooner or later.

She was so captured in her thoughts, that she conciously noticed the buzz not before Anna was almost down by her side. There really was no need to worry about another immortal, the place was far to lonely, and then her sword was sticking out of the grass beside her. She looked up and met Annas smile with one of hers.

„Hi Honey, sit down."

Anna sat down to her right leaning her head against her shoulder. For a while both sat silent looking out at the sea. Suddenly Anna held two photographs out to her.

„Who is this?"

She swallowed the question where Anna had found them. She knew it. They had been in the drawer of her bedside table. The first picture she had taken herself. It was a portrait of a handsome young man appearing to be in his late twenties or early thirties. The second showed the same young man embracing a young woman, kissing her neck. The woman was her. Lost in thought she starred at the photos.

„That's Methos." she said finally.

„And who is this Methos?" Anna wasn't hiding her curiosity.

She couldn't help smiling. Who was Methos…

„Is he an immortal as well?" Anna was asking again.

„Yes. But he's... well, he's more than just any immortal. He's quite old."

„Older than you?" Anna could hardly believe that.

„Yepp."

„How old?"

„Five thousand years."

„Five thousand…!? Wow. That's...that's ancient, no that's more than ancient, that's like historical!" then she added smiling: „But he's still good looking."

"Well, we don't age do we?"

"Have you known him a long time?"

„About two thousand years."

„And are you...I mean...were you...?" Anna looked at her shyly, not knowing if she might getting to something too personal.

But her teacher and friend just smiled wryly. „Friends? Lovers? You might say that..."

Anna looked at the pictures dreamyly.

„You want me to tell you about it?"

Anna looked up with bright eyes. „Would you?" she asked, exitement in her voice. "You said you would tell me about your life?"

„Yes. I did."

"Would you now?"

"Well, it's kind of a long story but we can give it a start. I'll tell you about Methos and me. About my life. And when I talk about my life I have to talk about him, because it's connected to his ever since I've first met him." She paused, hesitating a last time. „I don't know if I ever told anybody the whole story. It's a long story. In fact it's a uncountable number of stories. Stories about great love and great pain, about friendship, about fear, about passion and about despair. And about hate and violance. Most of all however about love...

I'll tell you about it. Maybe it'll help you to understand who we are. Who I am. And what you can have."

She looked at the never ending up and down of the waves, the endless wideness of blue and white, orange and gold. In her mind she was going back. All the way back through the centuries, to the old Isle of Britain, like it had been over two thousand years ago.

„My name is Claudia of Llanfairyngh. I'm a little more than two thousand years old."

„Like all of us, I can't say where I was born, but I was found in this part of the British Island we today know as Wales. My parents, who took me in and raised me as their own child, were good and proud people. My father was a foreigner. An armorer, that had come to this land with the Romans. My mother was as deeply rooted in this soil as one can be. She was a famous healer. As their daughter I was educated unlike most other girls. My father thaught me to use the weapons he sculpt and the logical intelligence of my mind. My mother taught me all about nature and the old ways and wisdom of our anchestors. She taught me to go with my intuition, listen to my heart and find the heartbeat of creation in it.

In the year when I was found, the roman emperor was blessed by the gods with a son, who was named Claudius. My parents gave me the same name in honour of my fathers anchestry. They believed that the Roman Empire meant no harm to our independence. Caesar had landed on our island a few decades ago, but the romans had little influence and mainly at the southern coast. But the times changed. The Romans got greadier. And our family moved further north to avoid the soldiers. But my mother was attached to this part of the country. It was their home. And they were to proud to run away from what they loved. Whatever it was that held them, it should cost them their lives."

***********

Wales, 12 a. Chr.

They had watched the sun go down together that evening. They had sat down at the river talking about everyday stuff. Of the part of the roof that they ought to repair, of the stag she and her father wanted to shoot this week, and of the foal that her mare Blanca was expecting.

It was one of those wonderful and peaceful evenings. The night that followed wasn't peaceful at all.

She woke from the noise of shouting men and neighing horses. Burnt smell was penetrating her nose. She jumped out of her bed and ran to the hatch of the loft she was sleeping in.

The place in front of the house was crowded with roman soldiers, and now she heard them in the house as well...

She saw four of them knocking down and slaying her father.

She saw her mother being dragged outside by her hair.

Then she heard steps behind her and turned around still too shocked to think straight. All she could see was a ugly, fat and grinning mug. She couldn't even scream. He was looking at her with greed in his eyes. Behind him another two soldiers stumbled through the door, and they too started grinning and licking their lips.

She retreated as they came nearer, but behind her was the wall, and at the same moment she reached it, their grabbing and tugging hands were upon her. They ripped her clothes and started pushing her from one to the other. They beat her. They touched her. They kissed her. Until the first took off his coat.

They raped her again and again, and not only the three of them. As the sun rose behind the hills, after an endless night of pain and agony, they decided they had enough fun. The last who stood up pleased from her abused body looked at her grinning. Then he took his knife, grabbed her at her hair and kissed her hard on the mouth.

„You were good fun." He said and buried the knife between her rips. With that he turned around and disappeared through the door.

She laid there in her blood, feeling with every flood life running out of the wound. She felt cold. It would be over soon. Finally over. She felt the blackness coming, drifting into it.

And so she died.

But it wasn't over. She woke with horrible pains. She could hardly breath. Still, for one moment she thought it all had just been a nightmare. She wanted it to be a nightmare so badly.

But then she saw the blood. All the blood she and half of the room was soiled with. She was naked, but she couldn't see a wound. She starred at her body in horror. It was covered with dirt and dried blood, but as far as she could see without even a scratch. But she remembered the knife. If it had been a nightmare, where did all the blood come from? And why did she feel this pain?

She stood up slowly, covering her body with a blanket. She thought of her parents. She was afraid of what to find, but she went to the hatch nevertheless. The sight filled her with such terror, she would never forget it in her whole life. And it should take a long time until she was able to surpress this picture.

Her strong and imperturbable father lay slayed in the courtyard.

Her tender, beautiful mother lay a little further with torn clothes in a pool of blood aswell.

The stable Blanca, had once stood, was nothing more than a chared heap. They had trampled and pulled down everything and set it on fire.

She couldn't understand why she was still alive. She had seen her blood and her life flowing out of her. Why was she alive? She didn't know. And she didn't care. She only cared about one thing: She would find them and then she would kill them.

She went down to the river and cleaned her body of the blood and dirt. She couldn't clean her memories of the things that had happened last night, so she stored them to stir her hate.

Then she went back to the ruins of her home. She stacked up a large pile of wood and laid her parents upon it side by side. She set it on fire and watched as the flames started licking at the beloved faces who now had lost their sparkling life forever.

As the flames blazed up into the air she turned her back to the pile and the place she once had called home. She just walked away from this life, taking nothing with her but the sword of her father and the oath to avenge the death of those she had loved.

*********************************************

Claudias eyes were filled with tears. Even after two thousand years it hurt to speak of this night.

Annas cheaks were wet as well. „I'm sorry. I never imagined your first death to have been like this. I'm so sorry."

Claudia mananged a smile. „It's okay. It was a long time ago. I've accepted what happened. But before I did that, my thirst for revenge induced me to do things I'm not proud of..."

„What did you do?" Anna asked

„I comitted murder. I thought I had a right to do what I did. The right for revenge was an act of honor. Still, what I did was wrong, because I let my hate take over."

**********

The forests of South Britain, 12 .

Her parents had taught her to fight, and they had taught her well. To be able to protect oneself was a necessity. But they hadn't been warriors and neither had she. Not until now.

It was a duty she had taken on by herself. It was all that was left to do. Now that her parents were dead, she had nothing more in the world. And maybe that was the only reason she was still alive.

She followed the trace of the soldiers, going south. But it wasn't an easy task, them being on horseback and herself on foot. She knew their lead was growing.

So she was surprised when after a few days she heard voices talking in Latin about half a mile before her in the forrest. She saw the flickering shine of a fire in the twilight of the oncoming night. Slowly and carefully she sneaked further, hiding in the shadows. There were three of them. Three roman soldiers sitting around a fireplace, talking and laughing. They were much to sure of themselves to worry about the attention they might draw. This was a lonely part of the country, anyway. But not lonely enough as they were about to find out.

Claudia was hiding behind a tree, only a few yards away from them. But she couldn't see their faces in the twilight. She crawled a little further to the left, hoping to get a better view, when a stick broke under her feet. She froze. But one of them had heard something, and turned in her direction. Damn! Slowly the soldier rose and started walking towards her, drawing his short sword.

„What's up?" One of the other asked.

„I think I heard something."

The other laughed. „Yeah, maybe it's one of those welsh witches or a goblin."

The soldier approaching her laughed too. Nevertheless he kept going. Claudia slowly draw her sword and waited. He was coming nearer. It were only a few more feet, and she could now see his face, but didn't recognize it. And in this moment he saw her. He opened his mouth, but all that came out was a gasp, as Claudias sword went through his chest.

In the same instant his body crushed to the ground the other two were upon their feet running to where their comrade now was lieing. But they didn't know who was hiding in the darkness, while Claudia knew damn well who was running towards her. She took the first by surprise as well, jumping out of her covering, and then her long blade also outreached their short ones. Maybe they even underestimated her, because she was 'just' a woman. Whatever it was, it was the last mistake of their life. It had not taken more than a few minutes. Claudia was breathing hard, adrenalin pumping through her veins. She took a look at their faces, but they didn't belong to the gang who slayed her family. This must have been a reconnaissance troop. She left the bodys where they had fallen, and didn't took anything from them either. The only thing being of any use for her would have been their horses, but they all had a brand, and so it was too dangerous for her to take one.

She walked the whole night, hoping not to lose the track of those she was following, if she stayed near enough to the road. She wasn't as superstitious like others, but she would not have stayed near the dead bodys for anything in the world.

**********

Claudia sighed. „They were the first I killed. But they weren't the last. I kept tracking those who killed my parents, fighting every Roman who crossed my path on the way. From one of them I took a horse that did not have a brand, which implied it orginally had belonged to one of the local farmers, who probably had not delivered it freely. Being on horseback I thought I had at least a chance to get hold of those I was following. I had long lost the trail, but still kept searching. And finally three years later, when I already had lost all hope and thought they had vanished into thin air and that I would never find them again, I stumbled across them."

***********

South Britain, 15 n. Chr.

Smoke was ascending over the top of the trees before her. She put spurs to her horse. She had a bad feeling in her stomach and when she reached the hilltop before her, she saw that her feeling had been right. She saw a little hut with a garden around it. The hut was burning, and the garden vanished under the hooves of the horses of the Romans.

She felt the rage rush over her. Galloping down the hillside she draw her sword. She moved among them like a fury. It were ten and she killed them all. Had they all been outside, she might not have stood a chance against them. But the half of them were inside the house occupied with the woman and her two daughters.

She could not have said who looked more shocked, the soldiers or the women, when she entered the hut. She was coverd with the blood of the soldiers that lay dead outside. In their astonishment and horror they reacted to late. By the time they realized the danger, Claudia had already cut off the heads of two of them with a powerful strike. The rest of them sprang into attack, but their tries were confused, and they stood eachother in the way. Claudia killed two more and in the same motion swung her blade at the neck of the third, stopping inches before his throat. She let out a sharp breath. She starred him in the eyes. It was one of her rapists, the last one who had killed her in the end.

„Do you remember me?" she said with a dangerously quiet voice.

Realization flashed in his eyes. „That's not possible." He mumbled. And then screamed in pure hysteria. „That's impossible. You are dead. I KILLED YOU!"

Claudia smiled a horrible smile. „Oh yeah, you did. But I came back to hound you. And kill you. But before that, I want to know where the others are. There were others with you that night. Where are they?"

„Find it out by yourself. Why should I tell you?"

„Ooh. You're not very helpful."

In a quick movement she pinned his neck to the wall with her underarm, pressing on his windpipe and piercing his knee-cap with her sword. He screamed and struggeled against her, but she already had the sword back at his throat.

„Was that reason enough?"

„Okay, okay! I tell you! I tell you! They devided our company. The others were sent back to the homecountry."

„Back to Rome?"

„Yes."

„You are a liar!" She pressed her sword harder, drawing blood.

„No! No! It's true. Only Antonius Ambroxus knows where they are now."

„Who?"

„He is the commander-in-chief back in Rome. Only he knows, where they were ordered to." He paused. „I...I'm really sorry for what I did to you."

„And that's why you were going to do the same to them?" she made a gesture to the three woman, who were still clinging to eachother fearfully.

„I'm sorry."

„Too late." And with that she sliced his throat, letting the limp body fall to the floor.

She turned around to the woman.

„It's over." She said. „Are you okay?"

They starred at her with huge eyes full of fear, noone said a word. Well, I don't look exactly trustworthy.

„We have to bury those. If they find them you would have trouble to explain."

The mother woke out of her numbness.

„You are right. We owe you thanks for your help."

„You owe me nothing. I did this as much for me as I did it for you."

„What did they do to you?"

„They killed my parents." With that she turned around and stepped out of the hut. There were five more bodys to bury outside.

***********

„But then you didn't really do something wrong. You saved the lives of those women by killing the soldiers."

„Maybe. But I would have killed them anyway. And don't forget those I had already killed, their only fault might have been to cross my path at the wrong time." Claudia took in a deep breath. „And I wasn't satisfied even yet."

„What more could you do?"

„I went to Rome."

**********

Rome, 17 n. Chr. The hills above the Eternal City

It had been a long and difficult journey. And it had not been easy to find the man she wanted to find. She could hardly just walk in the ministry of war and ask.

But she finally had found him. In fact she was in this moment in Antonius Ambroxus villa. Noone had asked her in. She had come in through the window of his study, and was now hiding behind the door waiting patiently for Antonius.

She didn't even had to wait very long. After she had been standing in silence for nearly an hour, she heard footsteps in the corridor outside, coming closer. Then a man walked through the door, unaware of her presence till he felt a sword at his throat.

„Antonius Ambroxus?"

„Yes."

The man stood frozen in place. He was younger than she had thought, maybe at the end of his thirties. „Who are you? How did you come in?" he asked.

„My name is Claudia of Llanfairyngh and I came through the window. Now I'm going to ask the questions here, just to make sure we understand eachother."

She pushed him towards the desk.

„Sit down. And don't even think about crying for help. You would be dead in the same moment, I promise."

„What do you want?"

„Three years ago, you ordered back some soldiers from Britain. I want to know where they are now. And don't tell me you don't know. I know your bureaucracy." She spat out the last word as if it was something filthy.

„I think I might remember that incident. It was a group of soldiers who had gotten out of control. They pillaged farms further north."

„Yeah, but why would you care?"

„We are roman soldiers and no footpads. One of the most important things that makes our troops so successful, is the fact that we keep the dicipline."

Claudia snorted. „Tell your fairytails to somebody else. I've been there. I've seen your dicipline. And now tell me where those soldiers went to."

„You are british, aren't you? You are far away from home. Why are you so interested in them?"

„I want to kill them."

„Then you must know, that I can't tell you where they are. Why should I?"

„Maybe because I kill YOU if you don't."

„Why? You have never seen me before. I haven't done anything to you. Why would you want to kill me?"

„You are a Roman, that alone would be enough. And you are their commander-in-chief. You send them."

Antonius sized her with a thoughtful gaze.

„What did they do to you?"

Claudia leaned over the desk, looking at him with ice-cold eyes.

„They killed my father and my mother."

Antonius held her gaze.

„And if you kill them, or me, will it change anything?"

„Maybe not, but I will feel a hell of a lot better."

In this moment the door opened. Claudia jumped at Antonius side, pressing her sword to his neck again. But she had not expected to see what she saw now. The person closing the door behind was a boy of maybe seven or eight years.

„Father?"

Antonius turned pale. „Oh Jupiter. Simon. Go! Go to your mother!"

„Who is that woman, father? She doesn't want to hurt you, does she?" The boy looked at him astonished.

Claudia was frozen. She couldn't move, she could only stare at the boy. Antonius turned to her.

„Please! Do with me what ever you want, but don't hurt the boy. Let him go. Please!"

Claudia was still staring. She made a step backwards. What am I doing here? Then she took her sword down.

„No, Simon. You don't have to be afraid. I won't hurt anybody." She turned to Antonius. „I'm sorry I disturbed you." She smild in resignation. "I don't think it would make sense to climb out of the window again. I wouldn't come far, would I?" Let it be over. It should have been over long ago.

„No, I don't think you should climb back out of the window, either. You should use the door. It's much more comfortable."

Claudia looked up in surprise. Antonius met her gaze with a sad and compassionate smile.

„I'm very sorry about what happened to you and your parents. There is nothing I can say to excuse it. Maybe you are right. Maybe you've got the right to take my life for theirs."

Claudia shook her head sadly. She had never felt so empty. So small. And so alone. She looked at Simon, who was smiling at her.

„No. Too many have died already. It doesn't bring them back. You were right. It doesn't change anything."

With that she turned and walked out the door.

„Claudia." Antonius called her back. She stopped but didn't turn around.

„Thank you." Antonius said.

Claudia said nothing and walked away. What should she do now? She was alone and far away from where her home had once been. She didn't have a home had no family and no purpose and she had no idea what it was that she'd become.

Wandering through the streets she heard the voice of her father, words he had spoken to her once, what seemed now a lifetime ago.

„When you don't know where you're going, every road will lead you there."

Claudia lifted her head and took a deep breath. Very well. It was time to see what more was out there and where fate would lead her in the end.

TO BE CONTINUED

A/N: Don't worry! Methos is in this story and will appear in the next chapter and from there on out. But since this story is (mostly) told from the perspective of an original character I felt the need to explain her background.

Reviews are very much appreciated!