Standard Disclaimer: don't own; don't sue

"Dammit that Sasuke! This is all his fault! DAMN SASUKE AND DAMN RAMEN!"

Naruto shouted.

He had made a bet over how many cups of ramen he could eat. He was just one away from winning when the storeowner threw him out for being too noisy. Since he didn't have any other ramen to eat the other betters said he couldn't eat anymore and so he had lost.

The cost of this bet? Something so gross…something so disgusting…Naruto didn't even want to think about it.

"The loser of this bet has to ask Sasuke-san out on a date in front of the entire class. Not only that, but if they fail to actually get a date from Sasuke-san they'll have to walk to school naked for a week."

Those were the exact words of the bet; so going on a date would be the lesser of two evils. Right? Right.

"Are you going to move to one side of the street and let me pass or are you just going to keep standing there?" Sasuke asked, coming up from behind Naruto and dragging him from his thoughts.

"Shut up, Sasuke. I can do whatever I feel like."

Maybe walking to school naked for a week would be better. It was the more probable situation at any rate.

"S-s-sasuke? Can I ask you something?" asked a girl, coming up from behind Sasuke.

"As long as it's fast," Sasuke replied distractedly.

"It will be."

"I starting to have my doubts at this point," Sasuke shot back, a tremor of irritation in his voice.

"Oh, I suppose you want me to get on with it then, huh?" asked the girl shyly, in a giggle-ish type of tone.

"That would be a good assumption, yes."

"Well see, I was just wondering if…if perhaps some time when you aren't busy…like this Saturday maybe-for instance…you would like to go on a date with me."

"I'm always busy," Sasuke said, "and on the very rare chance that I'm not I doubt very much I'd want to waste time with you."

Right after that harsh sentence the girl ran away, sobbing.

This is going to be really hard, thought Naruto, that bastard'll turn everyone and anyone down. Just what the hell is his problem anyway?

"Sasuke!" Naruto screamed at his rival at the front of the classroom.

"What is it you want, Idiot?" Sasuke asked, clearly at his most irritable.

"Uh, never mind, this is a bad time," said Naruto. After deciding going on a date with his rival was better than going publicly naked he wanted to ask Sasuke when the Uchiha was in a good mood, if he did, indeed have a good mood.

"Just ask'em, Naruto!" shouted a voice from the student section. No doubt he was in on part of the joke.

"No, I want to…" Naruto tried to explain for the anonymous voice.

"Just ask me, so I can go on ignoring you," Sasuke said boredly.

"Fine, Stupid. I-" Naruto began.

"Do it properly!" shouted some voices back at him.

Great, now Sasuke knows something is up, Naruto thought.

As if to prove him right Sasuke raised his eyebrows curiously and seemed to lean in, listening a little more intently.

…Cute, Naruto thought, seemingly out of the blue.

Then shortly after it was, GAH! Why in hell did I just have to think that! That's sick! It's disgusting! Sasuke is in no way cute! Sasuke is not cute. He isn't cute. He isn't cute.

"Do you want something or not?" Sasuke asked, all irritation gone from his voice to be replaced with indifference.

"Uh," Naruto cleared his throat, do it properly, like a real date "Sasuke Uchiha, will you please…um…" Naruto sighed, "Will you please do me the honor of accompanying me on a date Saturday night?"

"No," Sasuke said simply.

Naruto looked crushed, he was counting on Sasuke to help him keep his clothes on. Looks like he can't even do one simple favor for me, thought Naruto.

"I'm busy Saturday," Sasuke continued, "Change it to Friday and I'll come."

"Really?" Naruto asked, he couldn't believe his ears, nor his good luck. To anyone not in on the bet it looked as if Naruto had been secretly harboring love for Sasuke since the day they met.

"Sure, pick the time and place and I'll come," Sasuke replied, going up to his seat.

"Sasuke! Wait up!" Naruto shouted, trying to wave Sasuke down.

"Hm? What is it?" Sasuke asked.

"The time and place. For our date," Naruto added once he saw Sasuke's confused expression, "I'll pick you up at your house, okay? At six pm, so be ready when I get there."

"And just where are you taking me?" asked Sasuke, suspicion in his eyes.

"That part's a surprise, but I promise you'll enjoy yourself," Naruto assured him, after looking at his pissed off expression.

"Fine, I'll be ready," Sasuke promised, "Just be there on time."

"Sasuke! Come on Sasuke! Answer the door!" Naruto shouted.

"Huh?" asked Sasuke, cracking open his door, "Naruto, what are you doing here?"

"Our date! Don't tell me you forgot!" Naruto roared.

"Date? You mean…you mean you were serious?" asked Sasuke laughing.

"What?" Naruto asked back, blushing, "What's wrong with being serious? You agreed!"

"Yeah but…" Sasuke continued, still laughing, " I thought it was all for show. So you-so you wouldn't have to walk to school naked everyday. I didn't-didn't think you'd go through the mo-the motions this much. That-that's tru-truly honorable." Sasuke was leaning against the door frame, gasping for air, and acting very out-of-character.

"Well…well I was being serious. It wasn't even about the bet," Naruto said, acting angry. In truth it was all about the bet, but he wanted to make Sasuke feel guilty. How'd he even find out about that stupid bet in the first place? Naruto asked himself in his head.

"Oh? Well what if we make out on my couch for a bit? Would that be sufficient?" Sasuke asked, a weird grin forming between his lips.

Lips…his lips look delicious…red…I wonder if they taste sweet. All the guys who have kissed girls say their lips are sweet. Is Sasuke girl-ish enough that his lips are sweet too? And if they aren't I wonder if they'd still taste good?

GAH! No way! Sasuke's lips probably taste like horse shit! Yes, definitely horse shit. Or maybe it would be like making out with an ass. …Rimming…Oh God, rimming Sasuke…yes…

NO! Absolutely not! Another guy! It's disgusting! I am so not gay!

"Naruto? Naruto? Naruto, wake up," Sasuke said, " I didn't think you'd break down at the mention of making out with me. You must even be extremely dense...either that...or you just like me too much."

"I am not dense!" Naruto shouted out Sasuke, not really listening to the rest of the conversation after that.

"Then that means you like me too much. Well Naruto" Sasuke began to explain, "to be perfectly honest I'm not one hundred percent sure how to deal with over zealous guys, only girls have gotten crushes on me before now."

"You arrogant bastard! I don't have a crush on you!" Naruto shouted at him.

"But then why would you want to go on a date with me?" Sasuke asked, feigning confusion, he was in complete control.

"I-" Naruto started to say, then changed his mind, "You know what? You're right, I'm totally in love with you! Not only that but I would love to make out on your couch!"

And Sasuke was no longer in control as Naruto pushed himself through the door and throw his rival onto his own couch.