The water of the lake is always calm when I go out. The whole world reflects back at me and it doesn't care; unlike the average woman who looks at her reflection and always finds something to pick apart.
The air seems coolest at this time and you would think it would be quiet but the birds are always up chattering away as if to say, "Where have you been, did you sleep in? We have been up waiting for an hour already!" I would get lost in the beauty of nature were it not for the subtle puh-lunk of pebbles skipping on the water.
It is during this (not so) quiet time that I am able to see the world around me for what it is; That I can see myself for what I am. There's nothing concealed, no stress, no confusion. There's nothing I have to deal with. No feeling.
I'm free to roam wherever I please. With no one at home to return to, I can stay out for as long as I wish. The animals are used to me being around; the birds even seem to recognize me just by sound now. I like sitting here, by the lake. It's peaceful.
It's…real. Reality is rare for someone like me. Some people try everything they can to get away from reality for just a few moments-however, I can't seem to get a hold of it. It's always advancing, and my customs seem to be slowing me down.
Admittedly, I hold my customs close to my heart. As it is, this lake is a piece of my family's history. Standing just on the edge of the lake, you see a small house, form the old time, the largest tree in all of the world, and the most beautiful piece of sky.
The best time to see it, my father told me, was on the lunar new year. The sunset and sunrise were the most beautiful during that time, because all of the elements, the Gods, and the zodiac elements would soar across the sky, greeting you and wishing you a lucky year. Sometimes, he said, they would send special children little secrets during their sinseonghan year. (Sacred year-zodiac year.)
I think, now, that the most beautiful time to see the world here, is now. Early in the morning, at sunrise, during Autumn. The world shows its true colors, and all of its truth. It tells you to make a decision- to brave the cold; to continue on an unmarked path, to live an adventure of horror, or to return to your root; ignore the chances and go back, forget what you live for.
The lake here, it makes it easy to forget and forgive. It carries regret is each small ripple-each action causes a reaction, and those who regret their own actions come to weep into this very body of water. Their tears make up this reflective mirror.
The tree, the home, the small bedded forest feet behind, they all bring a piece of the family that has resided here. A piece of their reality.
Sorrow has lived here for many generations. Love, hatred, admiration, honesty, faith, regret, worry, strength, sickness, support, betrayal, and fear have all lived here. They still linger, waiting for the Family to return and feed them. I feel none of those in my presence; I feel nothing in my heart. I don't feel numb; feeling numb is feeling worthless.
The last thing I remember feeling was lost, before I came here. This lake gave me my purpose, in return for the feelings that held me back. My father spoke of this happening to him in his own lifetime as well. My family often traded with this lake, emotions and feelings in turn for purpose.
This lake holds regret, the feeling no one wanted to bear. This lake holds much more. With the reflection of the moon, the sun, and the stars that fall here, this lake holds reality, purpose, and course. It gives you direction without meaningless burdens. It's why I never left this calm, peaceful place.
My family is no longer with me, they've all gone to pursue their own reality as I wish to do someday, but I have to fulfill my side of the bargain. The family is responsible for caring for the nature that surrounds the lake.
I give time to nurture the old tree, I watch as all of it's twisted body, slender in some places, thick and mutilated in others, changes. No two days ever look the same for this tree. It represents the ever-changing future each soul holds. The animals each need care, as well. Though an old, secluded place, all twelve sinseonghan animals (Sacred animals-zodiac animals.) happily reside here. I gladly greet them each morning, as they come to drink from the lake.
I keep the home here clean, and, respectfully, as it was before the family left. I recognize my family as important, honest, and respected people, and will not dishonor them by misplacing or moving their items. It is true that I reside in the old time home as well, but I keep to my own.
"Haku," I turn, seeing the tiger curving around the tree to look me in the eyes. "You were late today. We were worried." I nodded gently, resisting a yawn. The tiger nodded it's large head slowly back at me, already knowing how long I had stayed up preparing for the newest stars to fall.
"Don't work yourself so hard. You need rest, the stars would be upset to see you so unhealthy." I nodded, moving to lay along the crisp, thick grass of the lake edge.
"I know. Holang-i leul yongseo jeoege." (Forgive me tiger.) I watched as pebbles from the lake edge rolled slowly and continuously into the water, skipping once or twice before sinking.
"Don't ask me for forgiveness. Wash up and eat well now. Bring some rice and tea for the lake and tree, and return to the home to rest, Haku." I looked back at the tiger, who had padded over to look over the lake, the dragon popping his head out of the lakes water to chime in. "And do not argue. You must be well rested to greet the new ones. Now go. Be gentle to yourself, maknae il." (Youngest one.) I nodded, standing and bowing to the tiger and dragon, before returning to the home. The tiger came moments later, to take the rice and tea from me, before shooing me to rest.
This is just a small drabble page I was requested to do for my English class. My humanities was a course about Japanese Internment, and my English teacher is very interested in inter-culture writings, so she asked that I mix:
1) A very old, short story about the zoidac animals she studied with me and a small group in our honors class
2) Old Korean beliefs (that came from the Old Korea time) as well as some Korean language usage.
and 3) The point of view from a uniquely designed character of anon-American fixture (show, book, etc.). ( we had to change the character to make them unique in some way from the original character.- Here, Haku is born with the body of a boy, but the soul and spirit of a woman, and is treated as such through the zodiac animals 'she' lives through.)
I hope you review and tell me what I could improve? I felt a little lost in some parts since I could only work on this in class. Also, if something confused you, just ask and I can explain to you. This is just the drabble version, I may have to continue with an elaboration project, which would extend this into about 15 pages.