Disclaimer: As you all probably know I don't own Smallville or any of it's characters.
Author's Note: Sorry if this sucks, as well as my other fics. I don't write much, unless I'm forced to in my English class with our horrible 20 minute writes. So anyways, don't crucify me if it blows.
It's Been Awhile
It's been four years since Clark has gone back home to Smallville. So much has changed, most for the worst. He look around the quiet farm, that was once filled with life. He walked towards the side of the house and picked up the sign. He stared blankly at it, reminiscing of the great memories he's shared with his family and friends on the farm. Shaking his head, he returned back to reality and stuck the sign in the ground. Selling the farm, his home, had never been on his mind until recently, when he had lost the last reason to keep it, his mom.
Her death had brought him back home, to the small town filled with so much laughter and happiness that had lately been overshadowed with grief and regret. There he was all alone, with no one left to turn to, to talk to. Everyone that he cared about he'd lost for one reason or another. And it was all his fault.
He made his way towards the loft. He walked staring at his feet and shoved his hands in his pocket. As he reached the top of the stairs, he looked up, hoping to find someone there waiting for him with open arms. Struck with disappointment, no one was there. Reaching the top of the stairs, he looked out the window at the house that held the love of his life, Lana Lang. He had lost her love, her trust, and her friendship. They had departed from each other's lives on such a bad note, that not once has he spoken to her over those four years he was gone. Walking over to the couch he sat down and placed his head in his hands. He began to think about how much pain he had brought to everyone that loved him and began to cry.
*****
Lana came out of the house with a book in hand, as she had when she was a teenager. Opening it, she began to read before she was interrupted by Nell.
"Lana, you know he's back right?"
"Of course I do. "
"Why don't you go over and talk to him. He needs someone to be there for him right now."
"Why should I? He hurt me so much, he deserves to be feeling the pain that he had once brought me."
"Lana, don't be that way. He was always there for you when you needed him. He's brought more happiness to your life than anyone else has. Just because he made one mistake, doesn't give you the right to stop caring. Not once has he ever stopped caring about you."
"But..."
"Stop. You know what I'm saying is true. And he needs you now more than ever. He's all alone now Lana."
"I don't know."
"Well, just please promise me you'll at least think about it?"
"Alright I will."
Nell walked back into the house with a smile on her face. She new that she had gotten to her niece and that Lana would be making her way over to the Kent farm any moment now.
****
Lana had reached the farm. She looked around, the farm was empty and was nothing of what it used to be. She walked towards the house and knocked. After standing in front of the door for a few silent moments, she turned and walked away towards the loft. She had remembered all the time that Clark and her have talked to one another, learning each other's secrets. Momentarily a slight smile was brought to her face until she remembered that what tore them apart was secrets.
She walked up the stairs to see a crying Clark sitting alone on the couch.
Slowly he looked up. He was in shock. It was Lana, standing there in front of him.
"Lana..."
"Hi Clark." She looked at him. His eyes were filled with pain and instead of being greeted with that amazing smile that he had always wore in her presence, there was face of regret and sorrow. In front of her face, was merely a shadow of what used to be Clark Kent.
Clark stood up and wiped his tears away as he slowly approached her. He tried to look in her eyes but instantly turned away, afraid of what he might be reflected in them.
Silence. Never had it been this way between them before. The awkward moments filled with thoughts of regret filled the air.
Lana looked up at him, and saw the distress in his eyes. The anger that had been living inside of her all these years had instantly washed away when she saw his pain. She walked over to him and flung her arms around him.
Clark flinched from the contact. It had been so long since anyone has touched him that way. He felt Lana's warmth surge through his body. He brought his heavy arms around her tiny body, and began to appreciate the human contact. One touch from her, and he felt human again, something that he thought could never happen.
As Lana slowly released him from her grip, she stared up at him, as once again he began to cry. In all the years she's known him, not once has she seen him cry so openly. She reached up and wiped away his tears.
She motioned to him that they sit down as she walked towards the couch.
"Clark... It's been awhile, hasn't it?"
He nodded and quietly he began to speak. "It's been too long Lana. I wish things turned out differently between the two of us. Better."
"So do I. I didn't want to kick you out of my life, but you hurt me so much. And I was scared. I didn't know what else to do." She looked intently at him as a tear formed and slid down her cheek.
"All I can do is say I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you... it's just that I didn't know how you would react, how you would take it all in. How and if it would change how you felt about me. I'm sorry Lana, if it makes you feel any better I've only felt pain since you left my life."
"How can you think that would make me feel better? Clark, I thought you knew me." She stood up and walked towards the window out to the sunset. Those words, Clark actually thought that his pain would bring her happiness.
"Lana, I'm sorry I didn't mean that. It's just after all these years, all of a sudden here you are. I'm in shock."
"Do you want me to leave?"
"No! I didn't meat it that.."
She interrupted Clark and began to speak. "It took a lot of courage to get me over here Clark. I just wanted to see how you were doing. As much as you did hurt me, there were so many other times that you've made me happy. I can't just forget those times Clark. You meant everything to me. I loved you."
Moving slowly towards her, he took her hands in his and looked into her eyes. "I still love you Lana. My love for you has never gone away and it never will. I belong to you and I'd like to believe that I belong with you."
"I don't think I can handle being hurt by you again Clark."
"I won't hurt you again. I promise."
Looking to him, she knew he was telling the truth. Sincerity was pouring out of his eyes and into her heart. She hugged him and held him close to her as they stood in the loft.
Clark's face slowly formed a smile. As they separated, he looked at Lana, searching for words to say. He only managed to mutter, "It's been awhile."
Lana understood the statement. Nodding in agreement she replied back. "It has been awhile." She reache up and ran her hands through his hair before kissing him and all of his secrets for the first time.
THE END