My Name is Keerrr-bbbeee
The rest of the fanfic shouldn't be the same as this, but I thought this bit would be easier for the wedding. Link/Kirby (yes, it's a he) yaoi.
In the beginning:
Link and Zelda are getting married after Link had rescued Zelda AGAIN from Ganondorf. Kirby has just swallowed his girlfriend (green Kirby) and is flying around above.
Zelda: *looking deep into Link's eyes* I love you, Link.
Link: I do too. Who doesn't love Link?
Priest: Then if nobody has any objections towards the marriage of this lovely couple…
Kirby drops like a stone onto Zelda, knocking her unconscious. No one liked her anyway.
Priest: Of Link the adventurer, and *opens eyes* and this wonderful person ….
Kirby: My name is Keeeeerrr-bbbeeeeee.
Priest: Kirby, speak now or forever hold your peace.
Zelda: Mmnn….
Priest: Then I happily declare you husband and wife.
Kirby: I didn't know Link was a girl.
Link: Hang on, here! You mean you're a guy?!
Kirby: Yeppers.
Priest: *outraged* You're pink, what was I meant to know?! You're wearing a tutu, for goodness's sake!
Kirby: I'm transgender, it's not my fault!
Audience: …
Link: That is awesome!
Everyone: …
Priest: And now, a minute's silence for Link's sanity. We will miss it.
A minute later
Everyone, including Link: Amen.
Link: I can do a handstand with a pie on my head!
Priest: It is well and truly gone.
Kirby: My hero!
Audience: …
Zelda: Mnmn….
Priest: Okay…. You may now kiss the er, groom.
Link and Kirby leans in. Kirby swallows Link.
Link (stick his head out of Kirby's): That was cool! Let's do it again!
Everyone: …
Link strikes up a conversation with Kirby's girlfriend, who had been swallowed a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. Kirby spits them both out.
Link: Hi!
Kirby's girlfriend: Who are you???
Link: Oh! Let me introduce myself. I'm Link, and this is my husband, Kirby.
Kirby's girlfriend: That's my Kirby!
Link: You have a Kirby too?! We should be friends!
Kirby is slowly backing away. Zelda wakes up.
Zelda: Link… what's happening?
Link: Heya, Zelda! Sorry I'll be late for the honeymoon, I'm speaking to Kirby here first!
Zelda: What? But, Link, we're married!
Link: WTF?
Kirby: You've been CHEATING on me?!
Link: Honey… it's not as it looks.
Kirby: Really?!
Kirby's Girlfriend; Zelda, we should run away to make our boyfriends jealous. They'll be begging for us to return!
Zelda: Hang on! Link, who is this slut that made you cheat on me?!
Kirby: My name is Keeeeerrr-bbbeeeeee.
Zelda: … I'm going now.
Kirby's girlfriend: Ayup.