Disclaimed.

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"Listen up, you couch potatoes: each recycled beer can saves enough electricity to run a television for three hours."

-Denis Hayes

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I'm Biodegradable, Baby

The Uchiha household was never one to be filled with catalogs and newspapers, so when he arrived home from a mission earlier that day, he was stunned to see the papers and little merchandise books lying around as if they'd been there forever. He carefully walked up to the closest catalog, as if it were an exploding tag, and saw that it was flipped to the jewelry section and was advertising a sale on engagement rings. He picked it up and put it under his arm, ready to recycle it (Sakura was forcing him to greenify the household) when he stepped on something quite crinkly. It was a newspaper, open to an advertisement for Konoha's most prominent jewelry store.

'It can only be Zabuza's!'

He peered at the slogan. "Huh, Zabuza sounds familiar..." Shaking his head of all thoughts that came in with the name Zabuza, he picked up the newspaper and put it along with the catalog. Only then did he realize that the whole living room was jampacked with the damned things and it would take him years to clean it all up.

Okay, not years. Maybe hours. But it would take a long time, nonetheless, and he was not willing to sacrifice this long-awaited night to pick up trash.

A nagging voice in the back of his mind, eerily similar to Sakura's reminded him that catalogs and newspapers were most certainly not trash, it was recycables.

Sasuke sighed. Sakura had managed to even turn his conscience against him. He wasn't that weak-minded, was he?

Orochimaru would beg to differ. Righteously, of course.

But, Orochimaru was dead, so...

Anyway, Sasuke knitted his eyebrows together, set on not cleaning up the biodegradable mess. Instead, he opted to make himself comfortable on his couch and turn on the television and do what all men in a relationship were supposed to do.

Be lazy.

Now of course, this laziness was only when Sakura wasn't home, and bless his soul, she was off doing something with one of her girlfriends somewhere. He only hoped she would be back by the time the Tila Tequila marathon would be over. She wasn't especially fond of that show and always made him feel kind of...gay when he made her watch it with him. He took another look around the room, eyeing the mess of papers, strewn about, and shrugged to himself.

"I'll do it later."

Several hours later, to be exact, it was about ten in the evening, Sakura opened the front door, bidding goodbye to Ino and Hinata, laughing jovially along the way. She slammed the door shut with only the nudge of her foot and surveryed the room, finding that her newspaper and catalog mess was still there. Shifting her eyes to the couch, she found Sasuke, sleeping and quietly snoring, facing the television. She rolled her eyes, took a newspaper, rolled it up and swatted her boyfriend a few times.

Sasuke was jolted awake.

"Wha-? Oh. Hi, Sakura." Sasuke sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning and smoothing down his hair.

"What's all this?" she gestured at the mess. Normally, she would have yelled and directed all of her anger from the hospital onto him, but seeing as it was her day-off and she had spent the whole of it relaxing with her friends, there really was no anger.

"Uhm...paper?"

"Yeah. It's paper that I left for you!"

"I'll recycle it later. I'm tired."

Sakura rolled her eyes again, understanding that Sasuke just wasn't getting the hint. "Whatever. I'm going to bed."

Sasuke's tired gaze followed his girlfriend's back (ass), and he was contemplating on joining her when all of a sudden a most frightening thought occured to him!

"OH MY GOD, I MISSED, LIKE, HALF OF THE TILA TEQUILA MARATHON!" Sasuke fumbled around on the couch, searching for the remote, and once he did, he promptly pressed the 1 button.

"Thank God for OnDemand," he sighed.

"You're such a dork," he heard Sakura yell from upstairs.

Dork or not, he was an Uchiha. So it all evened out in the end. That was his reasoning. And, of course, it made no sense, but when did Sasuke ever make sense?

--

The next morning came quickly and Sasuke was still glued to the television, having watched the entire first season and nearly all of the second. Sakura descended from the stairs groggily and tsked. Typical, she thought.

"How long til that's over?" she asked, preparing to make tea.

"I'm on the last episode," he droned.

"Are you...okay?" She peered out from the kitchen eyed her boyfriend. His eyes were bloodshot and his face was paler than usual from the all-nighter. And the circles underneath his eyes didn't make him look any healthier.

"I'll...make you some tea," she decided.

He nodded absently. It was only about 15 minutes later when the finale ended that Sasuke came trudging into the kitchen. He sat himself at the table, wide-eyed. "I was not expecting that..."

Sakura didn't really like the show, so she decided the conversation was going to end there. She had had plans to get a new subject going, as she watched Sasuke sip at his tea, but he kind of beat her to it.

"Do you think I could win on the show?"

Totally not expecting that question, Sakura spit out her tea, slammed her cup down, and glared at Sasuke. "Excuse me?"

He rolled his eyes. "Do. You. Think. I. Could. Win. On. The. Show?"

"Hell no, we're in a relationship," she enunciated. "Idiot."

The two continued to drink their tea in silence, with Sakura giving glares towards Sasuke now and then. But the ominous silence was interrupted by a few raps on the door and then a slam. A few clouds of dust and debree filtered into the kitchen and Sakura got up to investigate.

Sasuke didn't bother getting up. He'd be able to hear who was in the doorway when Sakura yelled at them anyway.

"Sai..." he heard her growl. "Is there a reason why you kicked my door down?"

"Yes," he replied calmly and serenely. "No one was answering the door, so I took matters into my own hands :D"

Sasuke heard a few light steps towards the kitchen, obviously Sai's, and following his were angry thumps. Sai floated in, grabbed Sasuke's tea, and sat down, crossing his legs, while Sakura slammed her bottom down on her chair and glared at Sai.

"You're fixing my door."

Waving her off, Sai positioned himself so that he could look at them both without turning his neck every five seconds.

"So," he started. "What's with all the crap in your living room?"

Sasuke jerked his head towards his girlfriend, indicating the mess was all her doing.

"For a reason," she defended. "That you, obviously, are too dumb enough to understand."

Sasuke scowled and cracked his neck. "Maybe I understand it, but I just don't want to do anything about it!" Obviously, he had no idea what he was talking about, but, when in doubt...

PRETEND!

"What did you just say?" Sakura shrieked, suddenly standing up and slamming her two hands on the table. Sai was enjoying watching the interaction between the couple and merely sat there, smiling his Sai-smile with his hands clasped in his lap.

"You damn well better know what I just said. Weren't you listening, woman?" By then, Sasuke's arms were crossed over his chest in a defensive manner, as Sakura gritted her teeth, trying to contain her anger.

"You know, I have every means to just...break up with you right now. You fucking asshole," she yelled, getting teary-eyed. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hands and sniffled, all the while glaring at the Uchiha, who was quite surprised at her threat to end their relationship.

Really, did he say something wrong?

"I don't want to do anything about it," she mocked. Her voice shook and quivered with all of her attempts to keep herself composed.

On the sidelines, Sai was watching with a keen interest. It was just like his morning soaps, only better!

"Wha-wha-wha...?" was all Sasuke could get out at the moment. He honestly did not know why she was getting all worked up. "Did I say something...wrong?" he asked carefully.

Sakura glared at him with all of her might and stormed out, screaming in frustration.

He turned to Sai, confusion etched all over his face. "Did I say something wrong?"

Sai just shook his head in pity for the Uchiha, trying his hardest to contain his laughter. As heartbreaking as it was seeing the once-prideful Sasuke look around like a lost puppy...

It was damn funny as hell.

From the doorway, a crunching sound was heard. Someone had walked in and was now stepping all over the debris the broken door had left.

A hand curled over the wall connecting the kitchen to the hallway and a familiar head peeked over to the two boys. Sasuke grimaced and slammed his head on the table while Sai was still attempting to get a hold of himself.

This day couldn't get any worse.

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Okay. So if you haven't read Our Song, you may just want to go over and skim the first paragraph...OR PERHAPS IT ALL XDDD.

JK.

Kay, you don't have to go read it, as it may spoil what happens in the end, but if you HAVE read it, this is just going into details of HOW it happened. Eh? Make sense? Yeah, it probably doesnt, but when have I ever made any sense?

I've become really into sasusaku...I don't know why! It's such a pretty couple XP

But yeah, this'll be definitely a three-shot, or a two-shot, or a four-shot, or a less-than-ten-but-more-than-one-shot. Ya know how it goes! I hope there was enough humor in this? Ughh, school starts in a few and I just have been blah with ideas and crap. This took me awhile to finish, I swear.

But I hope you like it!! If you've read...Our Song and What's in a Name, you'd probably know that Kakashi, Sai, and Naruto have a part in everything that happens...because, well, they're just awesome like that. But, there will be a part where Sakura's girlfriends will be there. Just sayin, ahaha. JUST TO MIX THINGS UP!There won't be any references to anything in those two, even though they're all related because this one is earlier...since they're not married nor are they having a child. OOPS. I may have spoiled some things.

Oh well. I hope that doesn't make me lose readers. With my luck, it probably has, but bear with me XDD

But yeah! KakaSaiNaru-three musketeers ship FTW.

They fix everything.

Any issues, ideas (I NEED THEM), laughs, uhm, thoughts...on this just review or something.

'Kay, I highly recommend the REVIEW though, ahahah XPP

I'm sorry if you actually read this entire A/N. Seriously. I just ramble and ramble and ramble.

AGAIN: don't forget to review and please tell me if you like it :D I'll still continue, but my humor gets sharper with encouragement, ahahah...!!

I hoped you enjoyed this...first joyous chapter.

SALUD!

PS. back to school NAY!