Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi or the lyrics from Heartless by A Day To Remember.
Title: Heartless
Summary: You'll tell me that you care and then run straight back to him…
A/N: Okay so I hadto write this. This is my favorite song at the moment and it's so Eli-ish. XD Very OOC. Sorry for being MIA lately; school. D: Here's a smutty song-fic ;D
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Eli's POV
He pushes you against a locker and kisses you harshly, forcing his tongue between your full, pink lips. Thatshouldbeme. You break the kiss and I hear you whisper, "I love you, Jake," and my heart falls into my stomach.
For once, my eyes are open to you and everything you've said. For once, your web of lies is in the open.
He smiles at you, wrapping his arms around you. He doesn't say it back. He doesn't love you back… But you're going to stay with him. He hugs you tightly to his chest and I close my locker, unable to take my eyes off you two. Thatshouldbeme.
I gave you everything I had until I had nothing left; still you act as if I'm just a burden.
Your lips meet his again and I groan in disgust, wishing the PDA rule was still in effect. You giggle against his lips and you smile at him. Your beautiful eyes stare into his lovingly. Thatshouldbeme.
I've finally let go.
"I'm going to be late, Jake," You say, pushing him away from you jokingly. "I love you," You whisper and he presses his lips against yours forcefully. "Let's skip. The truck is calling," He whispers, talking for the first time since you guys met up in the hall between lunch periods.
Stay silent at least for now and let me move on 'cause I'm so done playing these games with my heart.
"I'm not skipping again, Jake. I need to go to English," You say, pushing past him and he grabs your wrists roughly, pulling you in for another quick kiss. You smile at him, ignoring the bruising grip he has on you. "I'll see you after class," You say to him, walking past me and smiling sadly at me.
I've been around the world and back for you, now it's time to choose.
I walk to English class, taking the long way around the school to avoid you; it's what you would want. I sit down and I hear you talking to Adam behind me. You laugh as if everything's perfect. You act as if you don't want me anymore.
I've been swallowed by this wreck that you call your life.
You tap on my shoulder and I turn around, seeing your big smile. "I need the test," You say simply, making all the hope in my mind fall apart. I pass the test papers back and sigh loudly. You are such a complex person it isn't even funny.
I'm damaged from the inside.
It's last period and the bell is about to ring. I shove my books in my bag and leave the room when the bell rings. I go to my new car, waiting for you. I see you walking out with Jake, pecking his lips and leaving him behind while you duck out of his view so he doesn't see where you're going: With me.
I've been broken.
You climb in the car slowly, wrapping your arms around my shoulders and pulling me in for a kiss. When you're around, all my senses and values are gone. All I want is you, whether you have a boyfriend or not. I kiss you back with fervor, my anger towards you dissipating into the kiss.
Don't threaten me with what you think I feel.
"I love you," I whisper, unable to stop myself. You smile softly at me and run your fingers through my hair. You don't love me back. "I know, Eli," You say, avoiding my gaze and sighing quietly.
If you could read my mind, you'd be in tears.
"Let's go to your house," You say, pulling away from my body. "My mom's home tonight." I nod, starting the car and pulling out of the Degrassi parking lot. I look at you in the corner of my eyes as I drive. The way you are flawless. Your smile lights up the room. And then I remember that you're a slut. You use me for sex and I let you. We're disgusting people.
I'm sick of your excuses you hold above me.
The car ride was silent. You sit in the passenger's seat, raking your fingers through your hair and looking out the window. These car rides get more and more awkward each time because we both know that every time we do this, I fall even more in love with you. You don't talk. I turn on the radio and I hear you humming softly along with the music and my heart melts. That is the cutest thing ever.
I've finally come to terms with what I am. I'm nothing in your eyes, and this will not change.
I park the car in front of my house and get out, not bothering to open your door. You follow close behind me, your head hung as you stare at the ground. I open the front door and step inside, not bothering to ask if you want anything to eat or drink. You only want sex.
I'm living in a dream.
You stray behind me as I walk to my bedroom, opening the door and throwing my bag on the ground. You smile at me, grabbing my hips in your small hands and grinding your body against mine. I bite my lip, groaning. You push me down on my bed and straddle me, kissing me roughly.
I'll close my eyes and dream of a better time when I'll be finally past this and happy on my own.
You lift my blue polo over my head and rake your fingers over my abdomen, sending shivers down my spine. You pull your own red polo off and tear your bra off, your breasts bouncing slightly when they're freed from their restraints. Soon, our pants are off and resting on the floor.
I've done all I can and still I'm the one to be cast aside.
Your small hands enclose my erection, causing a moan to fall from my lips. You start to move your hand, squeezing me in your hands. You smile at me teasingly as I thrust my hips up off the bed, groaning your name.
All I ever wanted to be was the one to wipe the tears from your eyes.
I tear your hands away from my cock with a groan and pull you into my arms, just feeling your warmth enclose my body. You hesitatingly wrap your arms around me, your body rigid. I rest my head on your soft shoulder and feel you run your small fingers through my hair. I smile against your silky skin and you pull away from me, kissing my lips.
But I guess you'll play second best to a world that will never care about you.
You pull your panties down your legs and I push into you, telling you that I love you. Your eyes that were glued on mine seconds before shift and stare at the wall in the room. I move in and out of you at a steady pace, watching you writhe underneath me. You're covered in sweat and even in that very moment, with your hair in a mess and your makeup running, you look absolutely beautiful.
You'll never understand that you're just another pretty face.
You wrap your arms around my back and cling to my shoulders, digging your nails into my skin and sending me into a frenzy. I'm so close and, by your breathing, I can tell you are too. You moan loudly, grinding your hips against mine.
You'll tell me that you care and then run straight back to him.
Your grip on my shoulders tightens and your legs quiver as you reach your peak. I thrust into you one last time before releasing inside of you. "I'm so sorry, Eli," You say as I pull out of you. You say it every time, but you still come back.
I can hear your words of treason from a mile away.
Your phone rings and my heart falls into my stomach. It's Jake. You answer, a smile on your face. You get out of my bed and put your clothes on, talking to him. You talk to him as if nothing happened. You talk to him as if you aren't with me right now. You talk to him as if you love him… Because you do.
You never did know how to whisper.
You hang up your phone, telling him that you'll be right over to his house. You look at me and smile sadly. "I'm so sorry," You repeat as a tear slides down my cheek. "I won't let this happen again," You say, opening my door and leaving me alone.
You're such a liar.
It will happen again though and we both know it. You say that every time. Everyday. Everyday of every week. You tell me that this won't happen again. You say you don't like seeing me cry. You say you're sorry.
You're heartless.
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Review? :D