February 14th, 1976

Severus paused before turning the corner of the corridor that led to the Great Hall. So far, he'd managed to get from the Slytherin lair in the dungeons and all the way across the castle for breakfast without seeing any snogging couples, or even Potter and his gang of cronies. He was always wary when walking around Hogwarts alone, his ears constantly listening for the susurration of a cruel taunt or jibe, and today was no exception. In fact, out of all the holidays, it was this day he hated the most. He hated it more than Christmas, and even more than his birthday, and that was saying something. As if the smug, frolicking couples needed more of an excuse to rub everyone else's noses in how happy they were together, and, in turn, amplify his own loneliness.

Sirius bloody Black would most probably have his lips glued to some new girlfriend for the duration of the day, he thought with a flash of irritation and, if he were honest with himself, jealousy. Black seemed to get through girls as quickly as he got through broom polish. Potter, on the other hand, would be strutting around, boasting about how many cards he'd got, if last year was anything to go by. Although most of them were probably sent by Pettigrew. That pathetic little worm seemed to idolize the pair of them more than any foolish girl could. At this thought, Severus' lips curled into a smile, and after taking a deep breath through his nose, he rounded the corner and slipped into the Great Hall behind a throng of Ravenclaws and took his place at the end of the Slytherin table, a little further away from his own Housemates. Severus was not one for idle chit-chat and preferred to eat alone, watching other people rather than interacting with them.

Breakfast was a fairly boisterous affair as the tension grew before the arrival of the post. Many girls were giggling breathlessly whilst a few boys were stirring their porridge and looking decidedly green with nerves. Severus nibbled at his toast whilst casting a glance to the Gryffindor table. Lily was laughing with her friend Jenny about something. Even from here, he could see how the laughter lit up her green eyes and how tiny dimples formed on her soft, pale cheeks as she smiled. He'd often imagined kissing those dimples. She had her vibrant red hair down today, and it cascaded over her shoulders like flames. He felt his heart clench in his chest at her beauty.

At that very moment, Lily glanced up and saw Severus looking at her. Her face broke into another broad smile, and she gave him a wave. His throat felt dry as he smiled awkwardly and waved back, doing it in such a way not to attract any undue attention from his Housemates. He saw her mouth 'See you later' before she returned to chatting with her fellow Gryffindors.

Severus dropped his half-eaten piece of toast on to his plate. He couldn't eat now even if he wanted to; his stomach seemed to be filled with bubbles, and his heart felt as heavy as a stone. Instead, he took a big swig of strong, black coffee, trying to wash down the swell of emotion that Lily's smile stirred in him.

A loud screech of the heavy oak doors swinging open and a flutter of wings combined with enthusiastic hooting made the collective hall glance upwards. The owl post had finally arrived. Severus clutched his coffee cup as, one by one, parcels and cards were dropped here and there all over the hall, to squeals of joy and excitement. Of course, he would not get anything. He was not expecting to either, but it was excruciating having to sit and watch the pleasure of others. A little further up the Slytherin table, he saw that one of his female Housemates had just opened a beautiful, silken, heart-shaped box filled with dozens of exquisite chocolates and was kissing the laughing present-bearer all over his face.

Sighing, Severus chanced another glance at the Gryffindor table. Lily, it seemed, had not received a card but was instead peering over her friend Jenny's, and it appeared that they were speculating on who it could be from. Even though he did not believe for a second that he was the only male in the whole of Hogwarts to find Lily Evans breathtakingly beautiful, he was glad she had not received anything from an unworthy suitor. It would have only put her in a position where she would have to let them down, and Lily hated being unkind. That was one of the qualities he admired in her most. She always had time for people, even for him. Lily was also a chaste girl and had no desire for the silly attentions of boys. That was another quality he liked about her, too.

His musings were rudely interrupted by a card falling on top of his plate of half-eaten toast, making the knife fall onto the table with a clatter. He raised his eyebrows as he examined the neat, curly writing. Could it be... from Lily? He still possessed the one she had sent him several years ago, during their first year together at Hogwarts. His prized possession may have been nothing more than a childish declaration of friendship back then, but now… could it be possible that she returned his feelings? His heart began to thump in his chest as he once more looked over to her, but she was still happily talking away with her Housemates as if there were nothing occurring out of the ordinary. A little to her right, he could see Potter and his cronies staring in his direction and whispering. Severus felt a swell of pride. Yes, Potter, I have a card! Me! Severus Snape!

Ignoring the self-titled Marauders, Severus opened the envelope and pulled out the card, trying to control his shaking hands. The card was simple; just a red heart with gold script reading, "Valentine... Be mine?" He was relieved that Lily knew him well enough not to have anything fussy or ornate, or, Merlin forbid, pink! His heart now pounding so furiously he could hear the blood rushing in his ears, Severus opened the card.

Severus,

I can't hide my feelings any longer. I want us to be together. Tell me you feel that way, too.

Love,

Lily xxx

Severus looked up from the smooth, rounded handwriting, feeling giddy and hoping to meet Lily's eyes. But Lily was still talking away with Jenny. Why wasn't she looking? Why hadn't she acknowledged the card? Maybe she didn't want to cause a scene, he thought. She did say she would see me later. Maybe she's scared I'll reject her. At this thought, Severus smiled tenderly. As if he could ever reject her!

He looked back down at the card, and frowned. The card seemed to swim in front of his eyes. The handwriting was changing. Gone was the neat, curly script, and in its place formed a lazy, scruffy scrawl:

In your dreams, Snivellus!

Severus' face dropped. He felt like he'd been drenched with ice-cold water, and his stomach cramped. There was only one group of people that called him that name, and they were now pointing, laughing and pulling faces at him from the Gryffindor table.

Severus glowered at them through a curtain of black hair, ripping the card into tiny pieces with quick, jerky movements and willing himself to swallow the white-hot ball of sorrow that had lodged in his throat. He'd managed to master shedding his tears long ago and he certainly wouldn't let Potter have the satisfaction of seeing how much his cruel trick had hurt him. But it felt like there was a knife in his chest, twisting and twisting. Physical pain, Severus could deal with. What was another bruise, another scar? He'd received such injuries since he was a little boy, largely at the hands of his own father. But this time, Potter had attacked him where he was most vulnerable: his heart.

Was he really that transparent? Did his face light up like a Christmas tree when he was with Lily? Could they see his burning love for her in his eyes? Did he follow her around hopefully, like the puppy Pettigrew did with Potter and Black? Suddenly, Severus' hurt turned into a tight, steely ball of fury. He had learnt a valuable lesson today. Never again would anybody exploit his feelings like this. He would lock them away, push them down, and guard them so no-one else could see. He had to control his emotions. Letting them show was his biggest weakness.

He threw the tiny pieces of ripped-up card on to the table and left the Great Hall with as much dignity as he could muster, never once responding to the catcalls and jibes from the Gryffindor table as he stalked past, resolving to find a way to hide his feelings for good.