Author's Note: Well, here is my new story. The idea has been bouncing around in my head for longer than I care to admit, so I thought I would give it a try. I hope you guys like it.

Disclaimer: I wish I did, but sadly I don't own Arrow or it's characters

March 27th, 2016

Dear Journal (I guess),

I fell... At least that's what they tell me. I have no idea why I was climbing the side of my club, actually to be honest I didn't know I owned a club when I woke up. Since I have woken up I can't stop thinking that it is ten years ago. I woke up in a hospital and didn't understand what was happening. The accident was a month ago. The doctors seem to think that writing this journal might help bring back some of my missing memories.

Thea was here when I woke up, only it wasn't Thea... Not to me. I remember Thea as this little girl with pig tails chancing after me and Tommy everywhere. I remember her crying at night because she swore she could hear noises in her closet and I would sleep in her room on the floor to protect her from the monsters. I remember her little voice yelling, "Ollie" over and over again.

It took me a couple of days before I could even talk to her because even though her face hasn't changed it didn't feel like she was my sister. Then after I finally talked to her it took me another week before I would let her come visit me again. She told me that my mother aided in the leveling the Glades and is serving a life sentence in Gotham, and that's not even the worst of it.

Thea told me that Tommy is dead. He died saving Laurel when half the Glades went down close to five years ago, but to me if feels like it just happened. My best friend in the world is dead, my mother is in prison, my eight year old sister is an adult and to top it off my father died when his ship sank. I hate this... not knowing who I am. No one can understand how hard it is to wake up and be missing almost a third of your life.

To add insult to injury, Thea told me more bad news. For five of the ten years that I'm missing in my memory, I was missing completely. I was on the ship with my father when it sank and Laurel's sister Sarah was with me. According to the doctor who examined me when I returned twenty percent of my body is covered in scars and I can tell you that they are brutal. I have tattoos now too that I don't understand at all also; dragons and Chinese characters and some weird looking star thing... And I have no clue why I have any of them.

I asked Thea what happened to me on the island, but apparently I haven't told her anything about the island. According to her, as far as she knows I haven't told anyone about it.

Laurel has been coming to visit me a couple times a week since I have woken up. I asked her what she knew about the island and my scars, but she didn't know anything either. She said that every time she did ask I would clam up and not really respond. According to her, the only thing she ever got from me was that the island was the true example of hell on earth and her picture is one of things that kept me going. I don't find that to hard to believe, I know that I have always thought that she would be who I would end up with in the end.

Unfortunately though, when I'm with her I still feel like something is missing. I can't quite figure out why. I'm guessing it has something to do with not remembering the last ten years. She won't talk about Tommy with me, and every time I bring it up she starts to cry. Thea told me that Laurel and Tommy dated for a while and that Tommy died saving her from her work building. I can't put into words how angry I felt toward the both of them when she told me, but then Thea reminded me that I cheated on Laurel with Sarah and I have no room to try and pass judgement.

I have this body guard who apparently has been with me since I returned from the island. His name is John Diggle. From what I have gathered so far he is former military and has a wife named Carly. He has one adopted son and a son and daughter of his own. He seems nice enough, but it seems that there is something more he always wants to say but he doesn't. I asked him if we were friends before my accident and he told me yes, that I was the best man at his wedding. I also asked him if he knew anything about the island as well, but he says he doesn't. I then tried asking him if he knew of anyone I might had told about the island, he said the only person he thought I told was Tommy and of course Tommy is gone so I can never ask him.

I'm trying to make sense of the world around me but I can't. I want my memories back, but after everything I have gathered from the people I have talked to... Do I really want to remember ten years worth of pain again? Ten years of suffering and loss and I know that as the memories come back to me I'm going to feel all that hurt all over again. I can only hope that as the memories come back to me I will also feel the happiness that hopefully is in there some where and maybe (just maybe) the good will make the bad worth it.

I'm going to end this now. I finally get to go home, and with any luck maybe my memories will start to return.

Oliver