Author's Note: Yay! My first story back on . I haven't been on this site in like, 7 years, so I was pretty excited about it, not gonna lie though, it's still a little bit nerve-wracking to publish stories, haha. Ummm, this story was written while listening to the song "Oblivion" by Patrick Wolf, which is an amazing story, and I think the message ties in nicely to this story. Even though this story is more humorous and that song is on the serious side. It still works. :P Anyway, enjoy and please review! :)

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. :(

Oblivion

"Sacho, when I called the graphics company for the album cover, they had already closed for the weekend, and now I don't know if the album cover is done yet or not, and it's my fault for not calling them sooner and . . ."

"Sakano-san," Seguchi Tohma cut off the frazzled man before him. "It doesn't matter. It's Friday night. Just go home and deal with it Monday morning."

"H-hai, Sacho," Sakano replied before bowing and exiting the office.

Tohma sighed and rubbed his eyes wearily. It was Friday night, seven o'clock PM, and it was the only time Tohma could get any real work done. When everyone else was running around the music company, there was always something to fix. But now that everyone was in their respective homes, Tohma could finally get real work done.

The blonde had just slipped on his reading glasses and picked up the top paper in a stack of papers identical to the one he held in his hand, when he heard the door to his office open. Knowing it was either Noriko or Ryuichi, who were the only two people who would dare enter his office without knocking, he only spared a fleeting glance up to notice a little pink head pop into his office followed by a larger brunette one.

"Hello Ryuichi-san, hello Kumagorou-san," he greeted amicably, looking back down at his paperwork.

"Kumagorou doesn't want you to say hello to him."

Tohma kept his eyes fixed on his desk and the paper in his hand, even though he could feel his eye twitch. What he really wanted to tell Ryuichi was that if given the option, he would never say hello to a plush toy, but when he followed this course of rational thought, he got said plush toy thrown at him and a pout courtesy of Ryuichi usually followed after the assault. The assault usually knocked off his hat, which then messed up his hair, which then made him annoyed. So he usually just said hello, and addressed the rabbit as he would anyone else, to avoid the annoyance of everyone, including Noriko, who occasionally got caught in the cross-fire.

He wanted to tell Ryuichi this, but instead said, "And why doesn't Kumagorou-san want me to talk to him tonight?"

"He doesn't like you very much today."

Once again, Tohma wanted to say a lot of things that would probably not make Ryuichi very happy, including how a stuffed bunny could not possibly like or dislike him, nor did he particularly care if it did, but he instead went with a safer mode of speech.

"If Kumagorou-san doesn't like me today, then why are you here, Ryuichi-san?"

"Because I wanted to talk to you!"

"Oh, okay. About what?"

"About why Kuma doesn't like you!"

Tohma sighed once again and decided he was not going to get out of the roundabout way of question and answer this conversation was leading to.

He took off his glasses as Ryuichi sat down at the chair across the desk from him, placing Kumagorou on the desk. This was the other time when he couldn't get any work done: when Ryuichi was around.

"And why doesn't Kumagorou-san like me today?" Tohma finally asked.

"It's not just today. He actually doesn't like you a lot of the time," Ryuichi said, and to his credit, he did not look the slightest bit amused at how successful he was being in annoying Tohma.

". . . and why doesn't Kumagorou-san like me most of the time?"

"Well, it's not MOST of the time. Just sometimes. A lot of sometimes. But I wouldn't say MOST. That just makes it sound like he hates you. He doesn't hate you. He just doesn't like you sometimes."

"Okay – why doesn't Kumagorou-san like me at this particular moment?"

"Well, I mean, the reason at this particular moment is the same as most of the other particular moments in which he doesn't like you."

"Ryuichi! Just tell me why Kumagorou doesn't like me!"

Ryuichi grinned at having achieved his purpose.

"He says you're a little bitch."

Tohma glared at the pink rabbit on his desk. Then he realized what he was doing. And then he decided he didn't care and went back to glaring, because no one, inanimate or otherwise, got away with calling him a little bitch.

Ryuichi, who decided at this juncture that Kumagorou was safer in his lap, moved him there and said, "I kind of agree with him."

Tohma moved his glare from Kumagorou to Ryuichi. Ryuichi, however, was unfazed by Tohma Death Glares and thought they kind of made him look like a sixteen-year-old girl who didn't get the car they wanted for their birthday, or perhaps a six-year-old who didn't get the pony they asked for on Christmas, and he merely stared placidly back.

"And how did you two come to this conclusion?" Tohma asked.

"Well," Ryuichi started, "Kuma let me in on a secret theory he has that you don't really like Yuki-san nearly half as much as you pretend to."

Tohma's look softened. "Ryuichi-san, if this is about Eiri-san . . ."

"Stop it," Ryuichi cut him off, and Tohma noticed a more serious look in his eyes.

". . . Stop what?" Tohma asked. He was genuinely confused, as he did not see what Eiri had to do with anything regarding Ryuichi. Sure, him and Ryuichi had hooked up in the past during tours and after shows and at launch parties, and generally whenever Tohma had any ounce of alcohol in him, so okay, kind of a lot, but he still didn't peg Ryuichi as the jealous type.

"The way you talk. It's annoying."

"I don't understand, Ryuichi-san. I don't think I talk any differently than anyone else."

"THAT!" Ryuichi yelled and Tohma physically felt himself jump a little bit at the sudden loudness. "This. This is what makes you such a little bitch."

"Ryuichi . . ." Tohma started, but was cut off.

"Stop, stop, stop. Let me explain this to you. I don't think you like Yuki nearly half as much as you pretend to. You might have felt like you owed him something at some point in time – "

At this point, Tohma felt the need to interrupt. "I owe him a lot, Ryuichi."

"Regardless of whether you owe him a lot or not, I think you're over that. And as a side note, I'm sure pretending to be a psycho fanboy made that up to him more than he wanted," at this, Tohma was more than offended at having been called both a little bitch and a fanboy in a matter of ten minutes or less. "Oh get over it, you totally know that you do it. You might have been genuine at first, but then you realized how much it kept anyone else from getting even remotely close to you so you kept doing it because you're a little bitch."

There was the little bitch insult again. Tohma did not see any point in arguing with Ryuichi, because to the singer, whether he was right or wrong had little relevance to his arguments.

"I don't see how the way I talk has anything to do with this," Tohma decided to change the course of the conversation.

"You use honorifics more than is conventionally necessary in any setting or conversation and it's disgusting. But you do it because you know that if you talk in such a polite way, no one will feel comfortable around you, and then you can keep people at the safe little distance you like to keep them at."

Tohma raised an eyebrow. "So, you think you have me all figured out, do you?"

"Yep, in fact I do. And acting nonchalant about it is not going to make me second-guess myself."

"Oh really? And what do you propose I do about all this?"

"Well, lucky for you I don't particularly care if you faux-fanboy or are fakely polite all the damn time, so I guess you can just start getting over yourself when I'm around."

A faux-fanboy and a fake? Tohma couldn't help but laugh to himself, as that pretty much hit the nail right on the head. "Well, Ryuichi, I guess you win."

"Nah, Kuma's the one who brought it to my attention in the first place."

"Right, right, the genius, super-observant pink rabbit."

Ryuichi chose to ignore the sarcasm. "So, are you coming home with me tonight?"

"I don't know – will Kumagorou let me in his house?"

"He said you're okay now. And he thinks you're cute when you smile."