A/N: I'm so sorry for the delay. First I was sick, then had family over and then didn't have time to even think about The Mentalist. Anyway, this is more of a pre-tag (if such a thing is possible…) to explain how in "Blood Feud" when Rigsby called Lisbon, she and Jane appeared together in the same car very early in the morning. This is my take on what might have been going on. Enjoy!

5.4 A small step

Lisbon stood silently inside her dark office, looking at Jane who seemed to be asleep on his couch. Faint light from one of the desks reached his still form so that Lisbon could see his face, and she knew he was faking it.

She had become increasingly more adept at reading Jane's body language and what she had been observing recently made her worry. Since losing Lorelei and Jane's detour into hallucinations of his daughter, his behavior had become more erratic. He was still fooling everybody else, but she could see the cracks that he was barely holding together. His descent into his previous level of obsessiveness about Red John wasn't a good sign either.

Lisbon consciously took couple of deep breaths to calm her own nerves and to gain courage to go ahead with her plan. It was time for Patrick Jane to share what was going on in his brain, whether he liked it or not.

Lisbon stepped out of the office, quietly closing the door behind her. It was past midnight and there was nobody else around. She had waited on purpose, knowing that Jane would wait until she left before going back to his attic and Belladonna dreams.

She could tell that Jane was aware of her by the minuscule turn of his head as he tracked her soft footsteps. She came to a stop next to his couch and just studied him for a moment. His golden soft curls were a mess as they usually were these days. His face was relaxed but the lines he had acquired around his eyes and mouth were deepened. He had shed his jacket at some point during the evening leaving him in his dress shirt and waistcoat. The blanket that she had thrown over him in passing several hours before, was covering him up to his waist as he lay on his side, his arms tightly across his chest.

Lisbon made her decision and sat down on the couch, in the small space left next to his stomach, resting her back against his bent knees and then she waited. The unusual behavior of Lisbon threw Jane off his game, but he still waited for few seconds before opening his eyes.

"Hi Lisbon," he softly greeted her with a small smile.

Lisbon smiled in response but didn't say anything as she openly studied his face, not even trying to guard her own expression.

Jane lifted an eyebrow in a query, but didn't interrupt her. He kept his eyes on hers and allowed himself to enjoy the warmth of Lisbon's back against his thighs.

Lisbon took her time as it wasn't often that she got an opportunity to really see him, without any masks, without any interruptions. She lifted her left hand and with her fingertips slowly tracked Jane's face from his forehead down to his cheek and chin. From the moment she touched him, he went completely still and tracked her every movement with his eyes.

"So far so good," Lisbon thought as she hadn't been sure whether he would bolt out of the door immediately with the skin contact. Her fingertips came to rest on his chin before quickly ghosting across his lower lip before she dropped her shaking hand back to her lap.

"I'm worried about you," Lisbon said quietly as she kept her gaze on Jane. She was sure he had seen her shaking hand and how she was holding her hands together now to keep them steady and this time she let him see how affected she had been.

Jane looked dazed and didn't respond.

Lisbon reached out again and the moment her fingers touched his temple, his hand shot out and it covered hers, pressing her hand against his face.

Lisbon froze, keeping her hand still under the warmth of his larger hand and saw his eyes closing in his effort to regain his composure.

"Jane, you don't have to hide from me. Please," Lisbon whispered as she saw him silently struggling.

Jane opened his eyes that were now brimmed with tears as he looked at Lisbon. He was still holding her hand against his face, strongly gripping it as he let his guard down and kept his face bare and open for Lisbon to read.

Lisbon moved her fingers slightly and his hand dropped down as he let her continue with stroking his face causing him once again to close his eyes to hide his pain. Lisbon sadly smiled to herself. It was clear that Jane wasn't used to sharing and could maintain the openness only for a short period of time.

However, it looked like her plan was working. Jane was more vulnerable and open to her in the dead of the night and it was unlikely they would be interrupted. She would have preferred to continue this in private, but she doubted that Jane would have any of that.

"Jane, come home with me," Lisbon tried anyway, "You could sleep in comfortable bed and eat properly," she continued softly.

Predictably Jane shook his head, not trusting his voice as he struggled to contain his emotions. Lisbon knew that if she pushed she might make him lose it, so she let it go. She wasn't here to break him, but to try to help him.

"Scoot over then. I'm not leaving you," she ordered Jane and poked at his stomach. Jane looked up surprised, but obliged and made space for her as much as he could, which wasn't much on the old leather couch.

She bent down to remove her shoes and jacket, took her cell from her pocket and set the alarm before reaching down to grab the blanket that covered Jane's legs.

To Jane's astonished face she said, "I prefer not to be found in a compromising position with the team consultant," before she lied down and pulled the blanket to cover both of them.

She knew Jane didn't care about that but rather wanted to know what was going on in Lisbon's mind, but she didn't want to give him any chance to ask.

To her relief Jane stayed quiet and hesitantly settled his hand on her shoulder as he clearly didn't know where to put it. Lisbon wasn't quite sure either as she tucked her hands next to her cheek, but didn't really mind. She had scored a victory as Jane hadn't freaked out and ran as she had feared. Maybe he would allow her in if she took it slowly and instead of hints clearly showed what she wanted and how she felt.

Her thoughts started to drift as she got warm and the solid presence of Jane behind her made her feel very secure and safe. His steady breathing calmed her down and slowly she dropped off to sleep.

Only to wake up few hours later as her cell started ringing with Rigsby calling for back up and saying something about his father. As Lisbon lowered her head down on the couch, she realized that there was a strong arm around her middle, holding her securely against someone's chest and it all came back to her.

She smiled to herself as she realized that Jane was awake, but hadn't removed his arm. She settled her hand on his and caressed his closed fist for a moment and felt a sudden thrill down her spine when he allowed it.

"We need to go. We've got a case," she murmured and felt more than heard Jane's acknowledging growl.

As she got up collecting all her things and clothes, she was aware of Jane observing her, but didn't let it unsettle her.

She turned around to see him still on his side, hair tousled, watching her as she said, "Hurry up sleepy head," and jiggled the car keys in her hand.

Jane kept looking at her with a serious expression and Lisbon's heart fell.

"Do you think they will notice if we arrive in the same car at this time of the night?" Jane then quietly said and suddenly smiled teasingly.

Lisbon smacked him in the chest with a relief that she was sure was clear to Jane and said, "I don't care what they think. Hurry up!" and stood up holding her hand out to help Jane up.

He took it with a smile and ended up standing very close to her, her neck straining to be able to look at him in the eye. He softly touched her cheek as he stared deeply into her eyes before suddenly stepping away to grab his jacket from the chair where he had thrown it earlier.

Lisbon took a deep breath while wondering what she had managed to get herself into and stepped past Jane towards the elevator.

"Let's go and solve some crime, shall we?" Jane said while placing a hand on her lower back to guide her and for once she let him. He didn't remove his hand until they reached her car.

The end