Madam Mina Takes a Holiday
"New Year won't be a proper New Year without making resolutions!" declared a redheaded, pretty but strong-minded, young lady, lying on a rug near the fireplace.
" April, dear, don't you think that we–those present in this room–have already made quite a number of them so far?" politely reasoned an elderly lady who stood by the window, with honey-colored hair, fine figure, and a "motherly" look upon her sweet face.
"Of course, Wendy-bird, and many of them sounding quite impossible, even from my viewpoint," agreed a slender, fragile lady of indefinite age, dressed in blue (As a matter of fact, all them but for the redhead were wearing different shades of blue) with a chuckle, as she vaguely examined numerous books on the cabinet shelves.
"Excuse my being blunt, but what's the point of promising something we are hardly likely to carry out?" exclaimed the fourth lady, the youngest and the most pretty of all, whose dress and haircut declared the latest fashion. "As for me, this New Year I prefer to make a wish instead!" And she turned on her high heels towards her colleagues with a challenge in her eyes.
"Oh, really, Susan? And what wish might that be?" Three pairs of curious eyes were looking straight at the fair rebel in expectation.
"Well…honestly, I wish for some rest…That's it–for a small break. Or, perhaps, none too small…"
A mutual gasp in the room was too loud to be unheard.
"Yes, I'd like to take a holiday!" repeated the girl, now with more pluck than the first time. "In fact, we here are women, not some robots from those so-called sci-fi stories of your husband, April, and we really aren't supposed to work non-stop! We may be heroines, but we still are human beings, for Aslan's sake!"
The redheaded American—the only one in the group to be so—snorted.
"Honestly, girls," Wendy murmured, as if unsure whether to share her thoughts with the others or not.
"Susan may be a little immature, not being able to hide her emotions, but her words are not lacking in good sense…"
However, this time, there was no gasp heard.
"To tell the truth", Wendy continued, "sometimes I feel drained like a…like a…"
"An orange after being used for a glass of orange juice" April finished the phrase. "Mother Wendy, you are really too much of a lady—not to beat about the bush! Sometimes, you say? Well, for me, this condition is almost a permanent one!" And she adjusted the folds of her dashing red and white kimono over the customary yellow jumpsuit.
"To tell the truth", Wendy continued in a shy voice, "James is very hard to endure at times…Oh, man unfathomable indeed! Really, often during our marriage, I sometimes believe I have four children instead of three! And there had been moments in how hard it was to make him believe it was he who made decisions all the way…"
The "eternal mother" then uttered an almost audible sigh.
"Dear Wendy-bird," Alice at last seemed to switch back to reality from her dreamy state, "I'm not fond of complaining, but your James, with all his flaws, is at least sane! Not that Tarrant has many flaws, you know…but sometimes…sometimes I do wish he would be less mad at least for an hour…or better, two or three hours!" And she stepped away from the bookcase , throwing backwards a stray blonde curl. "Just fancy that all those years I had to manage both household AND business matters mostly by myself! And, mind it, my upbringing was quite different from April's or Susan's! I wasn't supposed to even know what the accounting books or bills or stocks were, let alone keeping them in order!" She made a soft chuckle.
"Well, although I wasn't brought up to be a lady," objected April, changing her position on the rug to a sitting one, "I don't think I have an easier life, living 50 years ahead of you in the future! Your husbands are at least English AND gentlemen, whereas mine is neither! Those Oriental folks and their ways!" she made another defiant snort.
"Well, Mr. Saki at least is not afraid of alarm clocks, is he? Neither has he a crocodile-phobia," returned Wendy.
April looked at her elder colleague with mild reproach.
"And do you think TURTLE-phobia is any better? And let's not forget to mention Saki's tendency to search for his katana (which is, thank God, safe in the attic!) every time he is displeased with someone. And it is not a rare occasion, Mother Wendy, I assure you ! As for his being sane," the news reporter gently nodded into Alice's direction, "I've got strong doubts about that issue…especially when in the morning, trying to wake him up, I hear: "Not now, Krang!" or "Those wretched TURTLES!" or "This world will belong to me!"…And if we only happen to pass near some museum…"
The former Queen of Narnia cut her short in the middle of the sentence.
"You don't have the least idea of what I have to endure on a daily basis! Really, my lot is the hardest of all! Imagine, living with a former self-claimed Dark Lord, whose main goal for the most of his life used to be to take over the world, whose ambition and self-assurance are large enough to fill an average castle, but whose income at present won't allow me to buy all the pretty things I want, and, besides, who had been until recently suffering from a severe attachment disorder, and had no idea what a normal family or family relationship should be like!" The pretty girl even shed a tear or two into her immaculate white handkerchief. "Moreover, he is hungry almost all the time!" she added with dread. "And to think, I graduated from university to be a mere cook!"
"Not only a cook, honey, but also a secretary, a housekeeper, a nurse, and even a sort of psychologist!" Wendy gently reminded her younger colleague.
"OK, girls," the redheaded "guest from the future" summed up the mutual feelings, hanging now heavily in the air, "I reckon we do have a right for a break, all of us!"
The murmur in the room became louder, like in an average beehive.
"Surely, heroines have the same civil rights as other people do!"
"All work and no play make Jill a dull girl!"
"We are too valuable society members to be used up!"
"Oh,is that so? So, from now on the salvation of the drowning is solely the business of those who are drowning, my dear girls?" A rich mezzo-soprano voice, followed by a rustle of skirts and a vague aroma of lilies-of-the-valley floated into the room, making the other ladies almost jump up and gape.
"Oh, Madam Mina…"
"So, my ladies, a break, eh?"
To say the Extraordinary Ladies looked uneasy would be a considerable understatement.
"Madam Mina", the Underlandian Champion started, "I'm afraid you haven't heard everything quite right…"
"Why, Alice, I may be old, but I am, thank God, by no means deaf!" The elderly Headmistress still had a royal air around her, making Alice wonder what fate would await Underland if their benefactress had indeed once replaced Mirana of Marmoreal. "I take it that all of you wish to have some rest?"
The answer was silence.
As if not noticing the mutual unease, the lady went on, "Well, the words of Miss Pevensie are by no means silly, after all. Moreover, to settle the matter of New Year resolutions, my friends, I personally prefer to make a one now—not to interfere with other people's lives anymore!"
Everyone stared at her, dumbfounded. Even April slowly sat back on her carpet.
"But, Madam…" Wendy started, at a loss for words.
"Yes, a well-deserved rest is all I need just now," continues the President of the League, installing herself into a comfortable armchair and putting her elegant feet on a nearby footstool. "At my age and state of health, my own family must be quite enough to take care of. Especially Ilosovic," she added with a soft chuckle, "Yes, my husband is indeed too much of a good thing! And other men, especially villains, shouldn't really worry me, indeed! Really, am I all villains' keeper? A cup of tea a la russe, with lemon and sugar, a soft blanket and some good old operatic tragedy—that's all I need for now!"
"Still, Ma'am," Susan appeared to be searching for right words as well, all her rebellious look vanished, "and what will become of us? You were our leader, our mentor and teacher…"
Mina's expression became as unreadable as ever.
"And what, my ladies, exactly came as a result of my so-called teaching? A bunch of cross-looking females, wallowing in self-pity and envy? Some mentor I used to be, as I see now!" She looked around the room with a somewhat wistful glance.
"Perhaps it is better for all of you that I had never meddled into your lives!" Mina deliberately didn't show her noticing the existential shock of her younger colleagues.
"Were it not for my interference, Wendy darling," she nodded to her overwhelmed ex-student, "you'd now be happily married to your father's colleague's son; a mistress of an immaculate small apartment and a mother of, most likely, one daughter, as, taking into consideration the world economy recession. It's hardly likely that your husband would let you have more children. So, dear little Jane would be quite overprotected, which wouldn't, however, prevent her one day from flying away "from all those silly grown-ups" to rather dangerous adventures, and your place, I fear, would be eternally by the window, dear girl…"
Wendy went pale as a sheet.
"And you, Alice dear, would be by now either another Lady Ascot, both in name and character, scolding your servants for the wrong color of planted roses, or, worse, an inhabitant of Dr. Seward's sanatorium…and, anyway, too big to fit into a rabbit hole any longer…"
The Underlandian Champion's face fell.
"As for you, April, with all your remarkable traits, I'm afraid you'd soon turn into an insufferable, bossy, sensation-addicted workaholic—did I use that term from your time correctly?—with nowhere to go at Christmastime, and with no one to receive flowers from, but for your hard-shelled friends…who'd still have a hard time battling with a power-obsessed and equally insufferable maniac…
April's face now was almost the same color as her hair.
"Finally, regarding you, little Susan, perhaps you would pretend to behappy, trying not to think of your siblings and your former title, seeming to enjoy all those numerous parties and boyfriends, but would your life be truly a full and happy one—ah, bonne question, as your friend MissStuart would say…And moreover, the world would have another "angry young man," eager to take it over, with no love at heart, only lust for power…"
Poor Susan was on the verge of tears now, biting her pretty red-colored lips in repentance.
"…But," Mina raised her voice a fraction, "why think about the world and its fate, if you, my dears, seem to be mostly worrying for yourselves? Therefore, my resolution is to retire from my post in the League. God knows I do deserve some rest. You may all leave now. See you some day next week for teatime, ladies!"
For a moment, nobody stirred from their places.
Then, April reluctantly got up, adjusting her kimono over the notorious jumpsuit.
"Well, ma'am…girls…I'll be going, then…" She looked rather unwilling to leave, however. "And to think I just thought about bringing along Roxanne—my friend from another TV channel—over here to learn a thing or two…Pity, she didn't have the chance of meeting you…"
Wendy also made a step forward, an uneasy look in her eyes.
"I believe I must be going as well. James doesn't like for me to be away from home for long. And besides, I promised him to edit his next chapter tonight…Good-bye, then, Madam Mina, girls…"
"And I," said Alice abruptly, "do have to go home and check on Tarrant. I really have. Who knows what madness could come over him in my absence…Wait, Wendy, I'm coming along!"
"Oh, and I almost forgot about the dinner!" exclaimed Susan, making a hasty retreat towards the door. "And what if Tom comes home earlier than usual? Not that there's nothing to eat in the house, but he'd grumble all the evening that I don't care for him and so on and so forth…"
"Yes," added April, ready to step into the looking-glass portal, "speaking of food, I can imagine what Saki would concoct in my absence…I'm not too much of a conservationist, but how on Earth can those Japanese eat raw fish?" She cast a last longing glance in Mina's direction. The latter, however, seemed to be dozing in her armchair. "OK, so long, ma'am, Wendy, Alice, Sue!"
The others were about to leave the room as well.
The President kept silence.
And then, just while April was making a step into the looking-glass, something Very Extraordinary happened.
There was a sudden crash, a whirl of wind, and a flash of lightning—all the effects Madam Mina used to admire in her younger days…
And a strange young lady, about the same age as Susan, and possessing equally good looks, with tangled curly blonde hair and wide, desperate blue eyes, dressed in a stained white silk-and-lace gown—perhaps a wedding one—almost knocked the astonished reporter down to the floor.
Once again, everyone gasped in shock. In fact, it was becoming customary for the League members to do so.
The President of the League all but jumped up from her armchair.
"Mais qu'est-ce que c'est que ça?" whispered the newcomer, obviously frightened out of her wits.
"And just who is THIS lovely creature?"Alice finally asked.
"I reckon this pretty little doll just dropped into the wrong mirror," grumbled April, getting up from the floor and adjusting her mistreated kimono again.
The girl in question made an uncertain step towards Mina, her face wet with tears.
"Mon nom est Christine…Christine Daaé.. Je suis..."
Mina stepped forward, her facial expression at last becoming the usual one—that of compassion and understanding, and hugged the astonished girl.
"Welcome to the League of Extraordinary Ladies, dear child! Susan, please tell Nivens to bring more tea!"
The other heroines finally relaxed.
Life was going on again. Or, speaking in the newcomer's language, la vie continuait