"It's all your fault that your mother is dead. You're a real piece of shit you know that? I can't believe you're failing your chemistry class. You're useless and lazy. After all I've done for you. I feed you, I clothe you, and this is how you repay me? You have ruined my life."
Isaac cowered in the corner as his father flipped the dining table and threw a ceramic plate at him, slicing his forehead. He reached up to touch the wound, then looked at the blood on his fingers. He remembered every time his father would lock him up in the freezer downstairs when he did something his father didn't like. He remembered the nights he would spend in there, screaming until his voice became hoarse. He remembered every beating, every bruise, every tear. Isaac had even begun to question if the things his father had told him were true. Isaac had started to believe that it was his fault his mother was dead. He started to believe he was lazy. He hated himself. Isaac was shaking, but he had had enough. For the first time in his life, Isaac felt strong.
"I have hated you…for so many years."
"The fuck did you just say to me boy?"
"I said, I hate you. I'm tired of being afraid. I'm 17 years old, I shouldn't have to be afraid of you. I shouldn't have to be afraid of you at any age. Look at me. You cut me. You fucking threw a plate at my head. You could have killed me. I'm not putting up with this shit anymore."
Isaac stood up and began to walk out the door when his father grabbed him by the arm and punched the right side of his face. Isaac immediately fell to the floor and grabbed the steak knife that had flown across the room when his father flipped the table. Isaac's father got on top of him and continued to punch him. With the last bit of strength and consciousness left in him, Isaac took the knife in his hand, and stabbed his father's neck several times before blacking out completely.
When Isaac came to an hour later, he noticed his father lying dead and covered in blood beside him. He sat up quickly in shock, making his entire head throb. He hadn't seen his face yet, but he knew he was probably black and blue. Isaac's heart was beating rapidly. Had he really just killed his father?
"No. No. No, no, no, no, no. Shit. Oh god, no."
Isaac checked his father's pulse, but there was nothing to check. Tears filled his eyes out of fear. He couldn't breathe. He laid on the floor and screamed while the tears flooded his eyes.
After about a week or so, it was decided that Isaac was innocent. The police considered him a victim of child abuse. Isaac had no other living relatives and had been living at Scott's house in the guest bedroom. Allison had left him over ten voicemails and probably 50 text messages. Isaac didn't exactly know why, but up until then, he just needed to be alone.
Isaac kept having recurring nightmares about killing his father. In his dream he couldn't do it. Every time he tried to get away or use the knife, his hand would freeze up and his father would hit him harder and harder.
One night Isaac broke. He woke up and he wasn't breathing. He knew he couldn't be alone any longer. Isaac picked up his phone and called Allison.
"Isaac? Are you okay?"
Isaac tried explaining everything to her, but she couldn't understand what he was trying to say through the sobs.
"Isaac. Isaac. Listen to me. Listen to my voice. Try to breathe sweetie. Are you at Scott's? I'm coming over right now, okay? I'll be there soon. I love you, okay? I love you."
Allison snuck in through the window. She didn't want to face Scott. When she got opened the window, Isaac didn't even move. In fact, she thought he was dead for a moment. Her heart dropped imagining Isaac committing suicide. She slowly walked over to his bed and softly whispered, "Isaac?"
She noticed his body moving up and down as he lay on his side, facing the wall. She breathed a sigh of relief, took off her shoes, and sat next to him in the bed. Isaac was awake, he just couldn't force the words to come out of his mouth. Allison saw the bruising on his face and her heart broke for him. Rage formed inside her broken heart and wished she had been the one to kill his father. How could anyone hurt her sweet boy like this? She stroked his hair and gently kissed his bruised cheeks.
"I'm here, Isaac. I'm here."
Isaac looked up at Allison as if he just noticed her presence. Isaac wrapped himself up in Allison's arms and cried. Allison held him tightly, rocked him slightly, and kept kissing his forehead while she silently cried for him as well.
"I didn't mean to do it. I never meant to hurt him. I never meant to hurt anyone. It's all my fault. This is all my fault. I don't want to be a killer," he spoke for the first time since she arrived, "I want to die, Allison. I want to die so badly."
Allison held him tighter as her tears continued to fall. With a lump in her throat she spoke, "Isaac, I know you didn't mean to do it. You would never hurt any-"
Isaac stopped her mid-sentence and sobbed, "You say I would never hurt anyone, Allison, but I did. I killed him," he said with his more intensity in his voice, "I killed my father."
"Isaac stop. Look at me," Allison said as she gently lifted his chin to face her, "You are not a killer, Isaac. You defended yourself. You might have been the one to die had you not done what you did. He deserved to die for hurting you like this all these years. Do you really think he loved you? No. But you have so many people around you who do love you, Isaac. Love doesn't lock you in a freezer. Love doesn't leave you bloodied and with a broken nose. I love you, Isaac. I'm never going to hurt you. No one is ever going to hurt you. Not while I'm around."
Isaac reached up and wiped the tears off her face with his thumb.
"Don't cry for me. Please. I don't want you to feel this pain. I'm so sorry."
"Don't you ever apologize to me for this. There's no need. If you're in pain, I won't let you be alone. And I never want to hear you tell me you want to die ever again. I love you and I need you here with me. I would have lost my head had I lost you that night. You're alive and you're going to make it. I'm here with you. I'll be here every night for you if I need to be. I'll make your nightmares go away."
Isaac could feel Allison's love soothing the pain in his heart. He was sorry for the worry and pain he had caused her.
"I don't know why you still want me. You deserve better. I don't deserve you. I love you so much."
"I will always want you," she spoke as she gently kissed the top of his curly head.
Isaac eventually fell asleep. Tears were dried up on his cheeks and Allison was still holding him tight. She didn't sleep at all that night. When dawn came, she saw the light of the sun shine on Isaac's bruised face. A new day was coming for the both of them. It wasn't going to be easy for Isaac, but he knew he wouldn't have to face it alone.