This chapter is purely conceptual. My goal was to introduce my characters and spawn the interaction between the herd while sparking minor conflicts between them. My hope is for their personalities to show through their interactions with each character. For now, I'm leaving this in the air to see what happens, if anything at all.
Pain.. Suffering.. Anguish.
The words cut through the air like claws on a sloth. The formless entities enveloped the night, covering it with the raw unsightliness of the animal they had met not three nights ago. It's breaths were ragged, uncontrollable and sporadic; It's claws were unsheathed and a moment ago were just about to be used end his friend's life in a subconscious attempt at defense.
Now.. It just stared. Diego saw very few things externalized from the multi-colored eyes gazing outward with a distanced glaze across from the fire that crackled and stabbed at the air.
And what he saw frightened him, though he wouldn't admit it.
He's just a boy...a BOY. And yet from the spectacle they just experienced it seemed like he had been through some unfathomable tragedy. This scimitar cat, taller yet slimmer in comparison was not three minutes ago writhing in what appeared to be severe terror caused by a nightmare, though it may as well have been real. Diego figured it was at one point in his life.
His name? Dax.. that was what he identified himself as anyway. And unbeknownst to the herd and his friend, he is scheduled to die in two weeks time.
"Hey! Come on man, snap out of it!" The weasel next to Dax snapped. He started waving his tiny paws in front of Dax's face in an attempt to gain his attention. His name was…
What did he call himself? Sigrid? Cyril? No...Des…
Desmond! Diego quietly questioned and mused at the similitude of the name he used. It wasn't ordinary, certainly not popular.. Though oddly enough it had a peculiar ring to it. He supposed it might have reminded him of his own childhood pack, but the thought was quickly dispersed, replaced by the weasel's frustrated attempts at bringing the predator out of his daze.
"Come on!" Des brought the tigers face down to his, both animals now eye level with each other. Despite the weasel's quick jerk, Dax seemed not to notice, his intense stare undaunted.
"Dax.. Look at me, bud." Desmond panted the words, winded by the high level of energy racing around the cave, with the addition of his own adrenaline coursing through him. Again, he called out to Dax, and again he was unsuccessful.
"Come on buddy you have to give me something here.." You know I hate to see you like this. This was true. At the moment he wished desperately for the ability to help. Desmond knew that his attempts were more often than not futile against the cats condition, and several times it ended up with him watching while his friend stared off into space.
Concerning his mental state: You can regard him as normal otherwise.
"What's wrong with him?" Ellie asked.
Desmond ignored the question, never leaving his friends gaze. He looked into Dax's left eye that glowed bright green against the flames. It was in this eye he saw nothing; consciousness seemed faded and all reality had decayed. Strange it was that flowers decay in stagnant soil, and parasites grow in dead animals; is it that the mind should leave, the same can be applied. Des wouldn't allow it. His right eye... It pierced the soul with its icy blue color. Desmond looked hard to find the tiniest glimpse of recognition, searching the galaxy itself for any life that had survived the horrid experience.. But he was again, unsuccessful.
A ragged huff escaped the nearly fully grown predator, drawing hope from his companion. Desmond brushed the cat's shoulder with his paw, gently stroking it soothingly. Imagine the look on his face when the comforting gesture was graced with agony and wincing pain. Dax recoiled from Des's touch, nearly swatting his face in the process as he mentally battled invisible demons.
"Back?" He asked cautiously, mindful of the beasts' unsteadiness. He didn't get a response. Instead, Dax looked down at the ground in avoidance, a woeful expression stretched across his face. Ashamed…Desmond pondered whether he was disappointed, as if it were a sign of weakness when shown to the weasel. No.. he thought.
"Come back to me, Dax. Come on, it was a nightmare. You know I'm here for you, you know that you can talk to me but I need you to come back." He placed a paw on the tiger's cream white chest, earning a slight wince from the cub. It's not him.. But it's not me either. Desmond understood that Dax wanted to come out of this state.. But it was all a matter of ability here.
"Dax?" No response.
He waited a second, patiently allowing his friend time to respond.
"Dax?" Still no response. The feline stared at the ground, taking note of the earthly glow from the shimmering blaze, quickly losing track of his surroundings. Time, it seemed, was irrelevant.. Until it was no more.
He would stay in this state, for another ten minutes, letting his mind take over. It would wander, bringing about memories of a kind he'd wish to bury.
VIII
Dax rolled his eyes. Waiting can be such a chore.
It was lake day, and he was to go with Una for a swim despite their mother's repeated warnings to never travel alone. But he wasn't alone.. He was with Una. That was his logic, anyway. Besides, all of the adults were either hunting, laying down, or engaging in play fights with each other.
Boring.
"Ready?" A female voice asked. It was Una, who padded up to the orange cub quietly through the tall grass. She sat down for a moment, taking in the trailhead that led to the lake. She could see the water already, shimmering with glass like shards reflecting the sunlight that beat at it relentlessly. Her eyes burned at the brightness, today was going to be a fine day..
"Thanks again for coming with me. I really couldn't stand listening to the sound of the pack members fighting. After a while, watching them swat at each other gets pretty boring." She said.
Dax smirked, "Yeah, I'm glad I tagged along. Our siblings can be a real pain sometimes." There were six. Dax and Una made two, with there being only two males out of the whole litter. The rest would often times engage in cub play, only stopping when they tire themselves out.
As they walked, Dax took the time to reflect on the whole "runt" situation with Una. She isn't built like all the other scimitars, with her legs sporting very little muscle you could mistake her for being a walking skeleton.. Which she would joke about from time to time. She wasn't the fastest runner, but that was partly due to the fact that they were only about a month old. One thing Dax had found out though was that she was a surprisingly good swimmer.
He had discovered her talent when he wandered off from the pack one day. Upon discovering the trail he took it all the way down to the lake, where he found Una, playing by herself, messing with some lily pads.
"You know, mom was arguing with dad again. She says you're special. I don't know what she's talking about, but she mentioned something about you being a cub who came back for a reason." Una said, breaking Dax out of his wandering thoughts.
Dax sighed. "Don't, Una. It's just a story. Mom said that she lost her first cub, and that I look just like him. I don't like it when she refers to me that way, it's weird."
"She says she can see it in your eyes. Something about your eyes being his soul mixing with yours." She said, trailing a line of small pebbles passing between her paws.
Dax didn't respond, instead choosing to study the ground seemed like a more tranquil way to pass the time. It didn't take long for Una to realize that she had gotten on his nerves, ever since Dax got his eye colors he's felt a certain distaste come over about them.
"I'm sorry, Dax. I just don't know what she's thinking with all of this. It seems like whenever she brings it up dad always loses his cool-"
"Can you blame him?" Dax interjected.
".. No." Was all Una said.
Dax looked ahead. "We're here". Up ahead was a grassy clearing with a beachhead. The sand quickly dominated the area, the soft dust feeling soothing on their paws. It was Una's favorite spot. Whenever she needed solace she would travel here, sneaking off when no one was looking. It was a place of peace and quiet, where she would go to think, which she often preferred over the play fights.
"I can see why you like this place so much." Dax pointed outwards at the lake, "It's beautiful here.."
"It is." Una replied. She sighed, this was going to be rough.. "Dax, there's a reason I brought you out here today."
Dax turned to look at her, "What's wrong?" it took seconds for him to realize that within her despairing… desperate even, facial expression was not just some small talk or gossip.
It was a warning.
"Neo is going to turn on dad." Una said quietly.
Dax sneered, "What are you talking about? Neo has been dad's loyal beta for several years now, Una. They've been friends since they were cubs, I-I mean they practically run the whole pack together!"
"Dax.. he's gone mad. He knows that our mother is a rogue, he gathered several members to discuss pack law and discovered that it was against the law for him to mate her."
Dax shrugged sharply, "What's he gonna do?"
"That's what I'm afraid about. I've been watching them for a while now, and.." she took a moment to gather her thoughts.
"He's talked about a mutiny.. I'm not sure when it'll happen, but-" Una's voice broke as a tear ran down her face. Dax realized just how badly she was afraid, and had no clue how to respond but to keep talking.
"But what, Una?"
"I think he's gonna try to kill us. He's gathered several pack members who feel like they've been betrayed, I guess. The laws of this pack have been upheld for years. He could've mated an outsider, but not a rogue."
Dax had a gut feeling that what she was saying was true. How? He wasn't sure. "Don't you think you should've told Dad?" His voice sounded slightly distressed, giving Una the indication that he was actually listening and taking in this information.. She liked that about him, he was the only one who would.
"I'm the runt, Dax. No one really cares about me, and they definitely won't believe me… Unless you were to tell them."
Dax took in a deep breath, feeling his heart race as this new threat seemed to loom over him. Una was observant, she was always watching the pack, and obviously knew more about their ongoings than he was aware.
"You don't know when this will happen?" He asked her.
"I don't. But it can't be long. The crowd was quite rowdy."
Dax's eyes grew large, "You followed them!?"
Una clicked her tongue, "See none of you care! Why is it that you never notice when I'm gone? Because I'm the runt!"
"I was hunting with dad! Night hunts are an important part of the manning up process, my dad says. I caught a crow AND a rabbit." Dax puffed his chest out with pride, causing Una to roll her eyes.
Una shook her head and clicked her tongue. "Boys...I mean it, Dax. Mom and dad don't want me. They're afraid that I won't make it. I'd like someone to have hope…"
Dax frowned, "I have hope… I hunt rabbits and mice for you for that very reason. You're going to prove them wrong, Una. I can show you a thing or two about hunting, I'm still new, but I can show you."
Una smiled at the friendly gesture offered by her sibling. She wanted nothing more than to show them that she can survive despite her handicap.
She would.
"Thanks, Dax."
Dax sighed, "We should tell dad right now about the attack, hopefully he can prepare." And as they broke into stride, ready and willing to blow the cap off of the primal lid, they heard the screams… And the growls..
VIII
"He's breathing, that's what counts." Desmond said to Ellie, who at the moment was tending to the scimitar. He hadn't moved, but his eyes would periodically dart, and he was actually blinking so that had to count for something right?
"How often does this happen to him?" Ellie asked him.
"Eh, pretty often. It's a loop, he's suffered trauma from when he was a kid and it seems to have stuck with him. He.. suffers from the nightmares a lot." Desmond responded, his ears drooping sorrowfully.
"Have you tried giving him herbs to help him sleep?" Ellie spoke softly, to Desmond it was almost motherly.
"Well yeah, I've tried that a few times. He responds positively to Valerian, Lavender seems to only heighten the intensity of the nightmares." Desmond let out a sharp sigh, absentmindedly rubbing his paws together. "I've tried brewing it, crushing it into a powder and putting it in his leftovers.. He hates it when I do that. I guess he doesn't like the taste." Desmond chuckled at the thought.
Ellie, however reacted indifferently, ignoring the statement. "When was his last dose?"
"Of Valerian? Four days ago. I upped it to see if he would fall asleep for a longer period. He's apparently growing some sort of developed immunity to it, so I tried to experiment a bit... He ended up waking in the middle of the night to go throw it up."
Ellie raised her eyebrow, "Have you tried anything else?"
Desmond nodded. "Passionflower. It eases the nightmares but causes dizziness, sometimes he'll vomit as well. Ellie I have to be honest I don't enjoy experimenting..I want to cure him of his nightmares."
Ellie sighed, "I don't really know much about how to go about it. Some of the animals we talked to have touched on something about Chamomile tea, but I don't think it grows here. There are, however... OTHER... ways you could handle it, something a bit more out there may work."
"Do you have any idea what she's talking about?" Diego said to Manny, who simply lay watching.
"Not a clue. She's the medicinal one, I'm just the grumpy one." He nodded with a smirk to the saber.
"I just don't know what to do, he's been like this since I found him-"
"Wait you found him?" Diego's ears perked, interested in the newfound information presented to them.
"Well.. no. He found me, but I raised him." He glanced back at Dax, images of him running around as a tiny cub swam through his head, causing a sliver of a smile to creep across his face. The thought of being a father figure to the predator brought a soothing comfort to his already troubled mind.
"Why?" The question was raised from the saber, though brought through a more accusing tone. It was brusque, and hostility seeped. Desmond thought about this, he's frustrated as it is by the storm that trapped them inside of the cave, but when they first met it was Dax who had been his target of interest… Diego mustn't like the idea of a scimitar being in his presence.
He sighed, brushing off the condescending tone. "He was lost and alone. Just a cub, you know? I didn't want to admit it at the time, but it seemed like there was something about him that just drew me in. He was so innocent, so alive. I thought he had some sort of disease at first because of his multicolored eyes but, after the first seven days...I couldn't get rid of him. So I raised him."
"How sweet of you!" Ellie praised. She smiled at the thought of someone else having the heart to raise an orphan, given that she herself was one when she was a child.
"He makes my life an adventure, really. Always has to do something or other. I can't tell you how many times that kid jumped off of cliffs... he's the only cat I know that cliff dives into water willingly. Not like I could stop him, he's too fast. But I'll tell ya I always get a kick out of it." Des chuckled quietly while staring into the flames once more.
"Cliff diving?" Eddie spurred.
"Bro, we have to try that!" Crash shouted with excitement at the thought of performing a dangerous stunt.
"I don't think so!" Ellie protested as she slapped their heads.
"How was he able to survive? He must have been a weanling when you found him." Still, Desmond felt the protest and condescension in his tone. It was obvious he didn't like the idea of a weasel taking care of a scimitar either.
"What's so different than us taking care of the human?" Sid asked. His tone was sincere, genuinely curious. Desmond watched as Diego shot a threatening glance over to the sloth, silently telling him to keep his mouth shut.
Diego's eyes once again focused on their target, stabbing him with their bright green glare. "I don't want him around the herd. I don't care if he's alone-"
"Diego!" Ellie interjected. She shot a glance over at Manny that read "If you don't take care of this you're sleeping outside".
Manny immediately shook his head, "Uuuuhhh... Diego you're wrong." He glanced back over at his wife, who merely rolled her eyes in annoyance.
"Manny he'll attract every animal within a ten mile radius to our location with his scent AND his… issue.."
"You call it an issue yet you say it like it's a disgusting disease.." Desmond noted. It was the only thing he could say before the two mammals began to argue. Desmond watched, taken aback by the statement though now silent, believing that picking fights would get neither party no where fast. In his mind, it was better to hold your tongue in instances of insult, giving your opponent a reaction fuels them, and you can bet they'll do it again.
"I'm sorry about that Des, I can't believe he said that.." Ellie put the edge of her trunk on his shoulder, a comforting offer but one that went unnoticed.
In front of him, the rest of the herd argued, no longer silently judging him for the decision to raise the cub but voicing it outright.
"Manny, it isn't right! He'll grow up never learning how to hunt!"
"So abandon him? We didn't do that to you and you didn't think you'd be able to walk right ever again!" Diego scrunched his face in frustration, angered by the remark.
"That was different!"
But one thing he did know was that they could relate, as it's not often you find a fully grown saber traveling with a small group of herbivores. Figuring that listening would get him nowhere, he silently padded his way over to his friend. Dax was now shivering, whether from the cold or the incident he couldn't tell.
"I know you can hear me.." He placed his paw on the tiger's flank, feeling the break in his fur from a couple of small scars, given to him during one of his accidents at a particular dive he performed sixty feet involving two snapping turtles and a dead tree.
He thought once more of his ventures with Dax, how his own life managed to spiral into this whirlpool of chaos..
I
"Push! Come on, honey you have to push!"
Several screams rang out across the valley as the in labor weasel did as she was told. Her grunts and rash breaths were accompanied by pained groans as new life was being brought into the world.
Her name? He forgot.
"Come on! Keep pushing! Breathe baby, you gotta breathe. Do it with me." Desmond stated as he began to breathe in quick, rapid spurts. He focused on his mate's eyes, the emeralds staring back into his own. She was rather slim, and although healthy in the beginning trimester he had noticed a steady decline, with her eating and moving less being a warning signal. Nevertheless, the idea of becoming a father brought warmth to his heart, and he would do anything to have the chance.
Again, the female grunted and groaned. Desmond smiled, noticing a head coming through as she fought for its life. He laughed nervously, gently caressing her paw and offering comfort to her. Vicariously, the pain she was in seemed a bit more understandable by the pressure of her paw squeezing his own, and he recoiled internally at the thought of having to go through something like that.
"Des.. Des I think.." she gasped. Desmond barely heard her as his attention was focused solely on the tiny form that lay in his hands. He drew in a breath, unable to form any comprehensive thoughts or words to life. What he held in his hands was his blood, his own creation. It was his child. His…
And it was stillborn.
Desmond gasped in shock as the being he held failed to draw in breath, or even move. His gaze lifted to his mate, dropping the lifeless child to the ground in a pool of fluids. He cried to her, but she didn't move. Tears streamed down his face as he crawled up to his mate, who's gaze strayed to lands beyond our own. Her eyes, he realized they no longer contain the universe he once saw in them.
Desmond swallowed hard, quickly concluding that time had run out.
Minutes seemed like hours as Desmond sat there with his paw intertwined with what used to be his wife. The aching heart inside of him beat heavily, and he felt betrayed by it. Betrayed by everything, it seemed. How could something so tragic occur at such a sensitive moment in his life?
The answer was null, he thought. In a word? Void. So he mourned. He wept, staying by her side and watching as the sun slowly settled behind the trees, only to come up behind him again.
"H-Hello?" A small voice called. Desmond paid no mind to it, if it was a predator, he wished it to come eat him. If it was an herbivore, he'd ask it to kill him..
"Hello?" The voice again rang through the valley. Desmond heard the small pitter patter of padded paws creep up behind him. Dare he turn around? He did. Behind him, standing with a rather pitiful expression along its face was a cub, a scimitar cub probably no more than two weeks old. It studied him, eyeing him everything around him.
Then.. It spoke. "Is she…?" He gestured towards the body.
Desmond slowly nodded his head, and turned back around. Please.. go away.. but it didn't. Instead, Desmond watched as the child crawled it's way to the front of the weasel and lay it's head on his leg… In sorrow. The cub began to shed tears with him. Unable to comprehend such an empathetic action taken by a predator, Desmond placed his paw on its tiny head and began to stroke it.
He would later make the decision to keep it, taking him in as his own.
I
"He's a good kid." Desmond spoke absentmindedly. Any remnants of faded from his face, giving way to a more solemn expression of silence. Desmond rubbed the back of his neck and walked away from the herd, returning to Dax's side once more. He placed his paw on his friend's shoulder. It was trembling, shaking from whatever was happening within Dax's head. He'd hear about it later, Dax was one to share when needed, especially when it came to whatever he was dealing with. Desmond was one to listen, as any friend would do, feeling pride in the fact that such a creature would need a small shoulder to cry on in times of crisis.
Of all the things he's seen happen to the boy, this is the worst. To witness such a creature of otherwise deadly power and speed act with such fright and terror left the weasel feeling helpless. Reminds me of myself, he does.
"I want it to stop." Dax said. Desmond could hear the tears hit the floor with the tiniest of splashes. This creature, twice the size of Desmond, his guardian, was shedding tears. There weren't, however, any sounds coming from him. How do you respond to such a sight? When titans themselves fall to their knees and gods fail, who is there to pick them back up?
Desmond knew, and that's one of the things that made him special. He always knows. What did he respond with?
A hug. He patted Dax on the shoulder, and the two engaged in an open display of affection to the herd. Dax openly accepted it, putting a single paw behind Desmond's back and pressing into him. As much as Desmond wanted to keep it to himself, when it came to the cub he was surprisingly soft, a trait forgotten for a time.
"Awe! Why don't we hug like that Diego?" Sid poked at him with a dull claw.
"Shut up, Sid." Diego growled at him threateningly, unsheathing a single claw to get the message across. It must have worked, because Sid's response was one of recoil and fright.
"Desmond.." Dax called quietly his name, laying down by the edge of the cave mouth while his friend leaned against his flank.
"Yeah?" His grey pelt shined brightly against the moonlight, casting a shadowy glow against his black stripes that traveled the length of his arms.
"I apologize for what I did." Dax said studying the bright red claw mark on Desmond's chest. The crimson reminder of his fallacy, he thought. What if this happened again? What if next time he wouldn't be able to stop himself?
Desmond shuffled a bit. "Hey, calm yourself. I can feel you thinking. And don't worry about the mark, it'll heal." Desmond said as he scratched the worrisome feline's ear.
"But what if next time I can't stop myself? I can't even remember doing it.."
"It's out of our control, bud. I'm doing what I can to find a solution.." He sighed, if there was a way he could take the kids' ailment he would in a heartbeat.
"If you'd be willing to work in the realm of unconventionality then we could try a brew of hallucinogenic berries and herbs, it's theoretical but I've heard stories about the effects."
Dax shifted a bit. "You think it could work?"
"I think anything is possible."
Silence.
Dax yawned. His mind wandered again. He thought of his sister, or rather the remnants that remained. Her face was dissipating, fractured and broken by time, and every day a piece of the memory is leeched from him. She was probably dead, taken by the pack or worse, by nature. If only he had turned around.. He would be with her.
His troubled mind was apparently not so isolated. With another tap on his leg he was brought out of his thoughts. "What's troubling you, Daxter? You're trembling."
The cub winced at the name. Whenever he was off somewhere else Desmond would bring him back with that pesky name. He couldn't blame him though, It was obvious his troubles were also his partners now. "Will we ever find That Place?"
That Place.. agreed upon the two as the place they would settle down once Dax was reunited with his sister. After the meltdown they traveled in search of her, following days old scent trails in an attempt to find was clear that he was speaking about his sister vicariously through the question, but Desmond couldn't blame him. Throughout their time it was clear he was as close to her as he is to Des, if not closer.
Therefore, it stands to reason that the question asked to him was directed more towards the quest for Una. With this in mind, Desmond drooped his ears again, knowing his response wouldn't be what Dax wanted to hear, but rather what he needed to hear.
"I'm not sure, bud."