Hello all, and welcome to the first chapter/part/whatever of The Bastard of Bigotry. It is, as you can see, a story about the Phantom Thieves in their efforts to unmask Donald Trump's heart. It feels like a pertinent story to be told here, now, in 2017, so I figured I'd try and tell it. Honestly, it's a joke that got a little too far out of hand, but the more I thought about it, the more I couldn't stop thinking about it!

Sorry for the lack of action here. Part 1 was definitely a focus on world building, explanation, and set-up. Which, actually, is pretty typical for a Persona game! The next part will get more into the thick of things. Enjoy, and leave a review telling me what you think!

Kawakami let out a sigh as she walked into classroom 2-D of Shujin Academy, looking more flustered than usual. Ann Takamaki looked up from her phone as the teacher dropped her bag on the floor like an anvil, turning to give a raised eyebrow to the friend sitting behind her.

That friend, Akira Kurusu, was fast asleep, head tucked under his arm as he lay sprawled across his desk. Ann let out a sigh of her own, before swiftly flicking Akira's head.

"Hey, get up! Ms. Kawakami is here, and she looks about as annoyed as she can get. I really don't think you want her to catch you sleeping."

Akira rose with a stretch, rubbing at his eyes under his glasses. Suddenly, a black cat popped out of the drawer in Akira's desk.

"I tried to tell him, Lady Ann, but he just wouldn't listen!" Morgana meowed, causing a few students nearby to wonder at where the noise was coming from. Akira gently pushed him back into the desk and out of sight, motioning with a finger to his lips to keep quiet.

"I wonder what the deal is." Ann continued. "Maybe she doesn't want to go on the school trip. Couldn't imagine why though, Hawaii is amazing."

Before she could guess further, Kawakami called her class to attention.

"Alright, listen up everybody. I have good news and bad news. I'm going to start with the bad news first."

Kawakami held a finger to her forehead. "The bad news is that you're not going to Hawaii for your trip. You'll be going to Washington D.C. instead."

Akira could barely hear the end of his teacher's last sentence, as a cacophony of complaints rose from the students of the class. Kawakami raised her hands up, trying to quiet the kids down.

"Hold on, hold on, let me finish. Because Shujin Academy feels that the trip you kids are going on should be more academic in nature, you'll be going to Washington D.C. However, as a result of the sudden change, the trip will last four weeks instead.

The tone of the students audibly shifted from protest to shouts of awe.

"Four weeks? Really?" Ann repeated, eyes wide.

"Seems a little overboard," Akira added quietly.

As if hearing his disbelief herself, Kawakami continued. "A cabinet minister has made this possible, deciding to fund the trip himself. One can only guess why he would do that. Probably to get some good press, what with that Prime Minister run and all..."

"I wonder who did that," Ann pondered. "Whoever it was, he must have loads of cash." Akira nodded.

"Maybe the Phantom Thieves made him do it!" a student offered, causing most of the class to laugh.

"Ha, ha, very funny. You'll get more information on the trip in the coming days. We leave this Thursday. Make sure you're ready for it." Kawakami clapped her hands together. "Alright, let's finally get this class started."

"Four weeks, huh? Well, I'm a little bummed we're not going to Hawaii anymore, but I'll take it if it means our trip gets extended that much longer," Ann said after class, standing up to stretch. As Akira gently placed Morgana into his bag, a blur of yellow appeared behind the two classmates.

"Did you two hear about the trip? Freakin' amazing!" Ryuji shouted. A few of the students turned towards the loud intrusion. Ann put her hand against her forehead, eyes closed in a grimace.

"Have you ever gone five minutes without having to yell, Ryuji? Yes, of course we heard about the trip."

"Washington D.C., huh?" Ryuji continued, oblivious. "Man, this is gonna be so sweet, I can't wait to see that giant statue of that old guy, and that big pointy thing they made for that other old guy. Or was it for the same old guy? I can't remember."

"Different old guy, Ryuji. It's called the Washington Memorial," a new voice answered behind the group. "Please do a bit of research before we leave on Thursday."

"Oh, hey Makoto," Ann said with a wave. "Did you say 'we'? Are you coming with us?"

Makoto nodded, smoothing her skirt down subconciously. "I'll be joining your class as a chaperone, as some of the teachers won't be available."

"Really?" Ryuji asked. "Why not?"

Makoto shook her head. "I'm not entirely sure. Even as student council president, there are some things I'm simply not privy too. In any case, I could certainly use the break."

A sinister smile passed her lips. "Not that I won't be working that brain of yours while we're there, Ryuji. Be prepared."

Ryuji gulped, stepping a bit behind Akira. "You can be really scary when you want to be, you know that?"

"Ryuji's scared of everything," Morgana piped out from inside Akira's bag. "I wouldn't take him too seriously, Makoto."

Ryuji clenched his fist at the cat. "Hey, that's not true! I have no trouble fighting shadows-"

"Hey, keep it down!" Ann whispered. "And besides," she continued, grinning, "a certain someone told me that you were terrified of shadows until you got your Persona."

Ryuji frowned at Akira. "Dude! You told them about that?"

Akira shrugged. "You were."

"Dude!" Ryuji said again.

"Anyways, this will be great and all, but I wish Futaba and Yusuke could come with us," Makoto said, leaning against Ann's desk.

"Yeah, they're part of the group just as much as any of us." Ann added. "But it's not like we can sneak them onto the plane or anything."

"You can sneak me onto the plane!" Futaba shouted. The Phantom Thieves were at Sojiro's coffee shop, and had just broken the news of the vacation to Futaba and Yusuke in Akira's large, room-converted cellar.

Makoto sighed. "Futaba, that's exactly what we can't do."

Futaba pouted. "Says you! I'm small! I bet I could fit into Akira's suitcase." Akira nodded in agreement, before Ryuji smacked him on the shoulder.

"You know we can't do that!" he shouted. Yusuke cleared his throat as he sat on Akira's bed, causing everyone to turn in his direction.

"Futaba and I may not be able to sneak our way into the trip, but perhaps we're ignoring the obvious here - going on the trip legitimately."

Ann, sitting across from Yusuke, finally spoke up. "Sure, if that's possible, but what about your class? Futaba's not in school, but wouldn't you be missed?"

"I am about a month and a half ahead in my studies," Yusuke replied. "I'm sure if I explained the situation to my instructors, they'd have no problem with it."

Ryuji scratched his head, eyes wide. "Wow, man, I didn't know you were such a smart student."

"He just has a work ethic, Ryuji. Something you seem to lack." Makoto turned to Yusuke before Ryuji could reply. "That sounds like it will work, Yusuke, but what about money?" Here the girl grimaced. "Not to be crass, but as far as I can tell, you're not exactly flushed with cash..."

Yusuke shook his head. "That's actually not the case. Simply because I don't wish to spend money as much as I possibly can, it does not mean I am free of funds. My mother left me a sizable inheritance, and with Sensei...Madarame in the prediciment he's currently in, I have access to his fortune as well."

Morgana, free from his prison-like bag, hopped onto the bed next to Yusuke. "Well well, sounds like you'll be able to go after all! But that still leaves Futaba."

Futaba snapped her finger. "Oh, that's right!"

"What's right?" Akira asked.

"My mom left me some money behind too," she replied, crossing her legs on the chair she sat upon. "I guess the work she did was pretty pricey. I don't usually ask for any of it unless I'm in the mood for some new computer parts, but I bet if I ask Sojiro he'll help me out! Especially if I give him some puppy dog eyes," she added, grinning at the prospect.

"I guess that settles it then!" Ann spoke. "I'm glad you two will be able to come. It wouldn't be the same without you!"

Morgana meowed in protest. "What about me?" Futaba jumped across the room and pulled at the cat's cheeks as he struggled to get away.

"Don't worry you little fuzzball, I'll make sure you can come too," she said.

Makoto clapped her hands, signaling the end of the meeting. "Looks like we're all set on that front. Make sure you're prepared before we leave at the end of the week! Bring all essentials, plus some extras if you can. And if you have any homework you can do while we're gone, make sure to bring that too. Oh! Also -"

Ryuji waved his hand dismissively at the Student Council President. "Makoto, chill out! We'll be ready."

"I forgot to bring a jacket!"

Ryuji paced back and forth in front of Narita Airport, with Akira staring at him blankly. The yellow haired fireball noticed this, and lashed out.

"Man, don't stare at me like that, I'm nervous as is!"

Akira shook his head. "Makoto warned you," he said simply. Futaba, next to Akira and with a suitcase by her side, snickered at the comment.

"I know Makoto warned me!" Ryuji shouted back, before putting his head in his hands. "I'm so screwed..." he muttered between his fingers.

Makoto, Ann, and Yusuke emptied out of a bus with a few other classmates. Makoto took stock of the situation, handing Ryuji something that she held under her arm.

"I knew you'd forget, so unlike you, I came prepared."

Ryuji unfolded the object. It came loose, revealing itself to be a red hoodie with the word LOVE emblazoned across it in bright pink.

"Aww, sweet, thanks Makot-wait a minute, I can't wear this!"

"Do you really have any options here, Ryuji?" Ann asked, her face expressionless behind a pair of black sunglasses.

Ryuji grumbled for a moment longer, before throwing the hoodie on. Futaba pumped her fist into the air.

"You guys, I'm so excited! We're going on a plane!" Akira smiled at her.

"You've come a long way since we first met, Futaba," he said.

Futaba hopped from one foot to the other in excitement. "Right? Consider this my reward after all my hard work."

"So this is my reward?" an angry voice growled from a cage atop Futaba's luggage.

"Was that Morgana?" Yusuke asked.

"Yes, it was Morgana," Futaba said. "And Morgana is going to have relax and deal, because this is the only way to get an animal onto an airplane. Isn't that right, Morgana?" she finished, tapping the cage lightly.

"I am not an animal! This is abuse! Abuse!"

"Alright, give him the blanket, Akira," Futaba said, with a fightening sense of finality. Akira nodded, pulling out a small cloth that was thrown over the cage. Soon Morgana's protests were muffled.

"Is everyone ready to go?" Makoto asked. The group nodded. "Good. Follow me, and we'll make our way to the gate. Make sure to take your shoes off before we get to security!"

An hour later, the group was comfortably seated aboard the plane - or as comfortable as one can be, when on a plane. Akira, Futaba, and Makoto sat near the windows on one side, with Yusuke, Ann, and Ryuji bickering on the other. As Futaba rattled off the long list of things she'd be doing in Washington D.C. to Makoto, Akira closed his eyes, nodding off to sleep.

The flight to Washington D.C. was nearly thirteen hours long, not accounting for departure and arrival, meaning that Akira and company were traveling for almost 15 hours total. They quickly melted into exhaustion, and the group was barely able to drum up any excitement for the rather swanky hotel they found themselves at - also paid for by that government member.

After some cursory goodbyes, the team split into two groups - Akira, Ryuji, Yusuke, and Morgana headed to one room, with Ann, Makoto, and Futaba leaving to the other. When the three boys arrived at their room, they weren't prepared for what they found.

"What!? There are only two beds!?" Ryuji exclaimed.

"So it would seem," Yusuke replied, hand resting on his chin. "It is unfortunate that one of you will have to sleep on the floor."

"Wha - hell no man, you sleep on the floor! You're not even supposed to be on this trip!"

Yusuke was silent for a moment. "Very well. It is through adversity that an artist grows. These cold tiles will someday bear the weight of my next masterpiece, it would seem. I will bid you two goodnight, then." With that, Yusuke took a few steps forward, before collapsing onto the floor. It looked like he was asleep before he had even hit the ground.

Ryuji stared at him. "I didn't think it was gonna be that easy...you're not even gonna change, man? Or we could like, bring you some blankets or something..." Ryuji was met only with Yusuke's snores as a response.

Ryuji shrugged his shoulders. "Alright then." He turned to Akira. "I'm gonna go change in the bathroom. You can change here. You'll probably be asleep before I get back, though, huh."

Minutes after changing, Ryuji's prediction was confirmed, as he found Akira snoring, Morgana at the foot of his bed.

The next day, the group was ready to start its trip in earnest. After a hearty breakfast at the hotel's buffet (I'm going to eat everything!" a very hungry Ryuji had exclaimed) the thieves merged with their class and headed out for their first day of touring. Makoto took the lead, moving the students onto a bus that shuttled them off towards their first, and perhaps most obvious destination - the White House.

Ryuji leaned over to speak to Akira as they were driven. "I haven't been keeping up with politics much -"

"- that's surprising," Futaba interrupted, rolling her eyes.

"Shut it, pipsqueak! Anyways, what's been going on in America?"

At these words, Ann whirled around to look at Ryuji, eyes wide. "You...don't know what's been happening in America?"

Ryuji, surprised at his peer's intensity, winced. "I mean...no? We've been caught up in you-know-what and I'm running again, so..."

Yusuke chuckled. "You are in for quite a shock then, my friend."

Ryuji turned to Akira. "Wait, do you know what's been going on in the states?"

Before Akira could speak, Morgana peeked out of the boy's student bag, speaking on his behalf. "This guy never keeps up with the news. He's always studying."

Here, Makoto finally spoke up. "That's not ideal, Akira. Studies are important, but it's equally important to stay up-to-date on current events.

Akira fiddled with his hair sheepishly as Morgana laughed.

"In any case, if that's how it is, it'd probably be better for you two to just see for yourself," Makoto continued. She sighed. "But, as Yusuke said, what you're going to see will probably be...intense, to say the least."

Ryuji shrugged. "It's just a school trip. How bad could it be?"

"Wow, this...is pretty bad."