Hey everyone! This is another part of the family series and follows Dust in the Wind so if you haven't read that one you will be lost for sure. This story is going to be smaller stories with the boys so it'll jump around more and it won't really be like the others. But I hope you all like it!
"Alec, c'mon, let's go out. Go to a bar or a diner or something," Dean tried.
Alec slowly forced his eyes open, but then shook his head no. He knew what Dean was doing; he'd been doing it ever since he'd gotten hurt, but he was too tired. He didn't want to go anywhere and he didn't want to do anything. He thought he'd be able to get over being responsible for Hank and Link's deaths once they left Freak Valley, but it wasn't working. He had to force down food and he was always tired, so he slept all day. He'd felt a little better for a few days, but then it hit him again and when it did he just shut down.
He couldn't do much anyway since he was still healing. His collarbone was being held together by screws and since his ribs were still broken, even breathing hurt. Sam and Dean made sure he was taking his pills, but they made him sleepy too.
"Ok…" Dean muttered. "How 'bout we turn on the TV? I can order some pizza and we can look up some cases."
Alec sighed; he didn't want to do any of that, but Dean wouldn't stop unless he agreed to do something. "Fine…" Alec breathed out. He started to sit up, and a second later, Dean's hands were there to help. Dean was looking at him in concern, and he actually didn't have the energy to reassure him that he was ok.
"What kind of pizza do you want?" Sam suddenly asked from across the room. He had his phone in his hand and was already ordering.
"I don't care," Alec mumbled.
Sam went back to ordering while Dean grabbed the laptop and turned on the TV. "We don't have to look up cases if you don't want to," Dean said. "We can watch funny cat videos if that sounds more fun."
Alec rolled his eyes and cracked a small smile, "You're just sayin' that 'cause I'm part cat."
"And cats are funny," Dean said. "So, which one?"
"Let's just look up cases," Alec said. At least if they found a case then Sam and Dean would be busy and they could actually get back to helping people.
Dean started typing, and then scrolled through what looked like possible cases. Alec read through some of them, but he was tired again and the words were starting to blur together. He didn't even try to fight to stay awake. He leaned over and rested his head against Dean's shoulder. Luckily, Dean didn't make him wake back up. Instead, he shifted a little so he would be more comfortable.
He dozed for a while. He could smell the pizza once it got there, but Sam and Dean let him sleep. They would probably save him some so he could try to eat it later.
"Find anything?" Sam asked after a while.
Dean shrugged, but then froze. He waited a second, probably to see if he was going to wake up, before he said, "Possible spirit a couple hours from here."
"Dean…this isn't working," Sam said. "He's not getting better."
"Sam…"
"I know we thought getting him back on the road would help, but he's still not eating much and all he does is sleep," Sam said.
"I don't know what else to do," Dean admitted. "I've tried talking to him about it, but he doesn't want to. We've included him in as much as we could, but he doesn't want to do anything. I didn't want to hunt since he'd be left out, but what else can we do?"
"Maybe we should actually go on this hunt. It'd give him some time by himself and maybe it would help motivate him," Sam said.
"Yeah…He likes helping people…but it's gonna take a while for his collarbone to heal," Dean said.
"He's depressed, Dean."
"I know…"
He knew he was scaring Sam and Dean, and he'd tried to be ok for a while, but it was too much. He wished he knew how to make himself forget; he actually wished he was at Manticore. They knew how to make him forget, and then he could put himself back together later. He couldn't put himself back together until he forgot.
Dean's arm moved around him, and then he was being shifted down. A blanket covered him after a moment and Dean gently ruffled his hair before he walked across the room.
"We should leave in the morning…" Dean muttered.
"You gonna be ok by yourself for a while?" Dean asked, crouched down in front of him. Alec nodded even though Dean wasn't going to believe him. "If you need anything, just call us, ok?"
"Ok," Alec said.
"And there's food in the fridge if you get hungry," Sam said. "You just need to heat it up for a minute. Or you can order whatever you want. I'll even leave my money for you."
"I'll be fine," Alec said. "You should go."
"We don't have to go. We can call Bobby and get him on the case," Dean quickly said. "I don't want you to feel left out."
"Dean, I'm fine. You guys should hunt," Alec urged.
"Just promise that you'll call us if you need something," Sam said. "Anything at all, ok?"
"Ok, I promise," Alec grumbled. He was probably just going to sleep the whole time anyway.
Neither of his brothers looked happy about this, but they did eventually agree. Dean put his pills and some water right next to him and Sam got him the remote and an extra pillow and blanket if he needed it. Them helping him and taking care of him though, wasn't really helping. It really just made him feel worse. He didn't deserve their help.
"We'll be back pretty soon…you sure you're gonna be alright?" Dean asked him one more time.
"Yeah…" Alec whispered. Dean frowned since that hadn't been very convincing, so he quickly tried again, "I'll be fine. Just go kill this ghost or whatever."
Dean sighed, but eventually followed Sam out the door.
He tried to sleep once they were gone, but for the first time since everything happened he found that he couldn't. He was worried about his brothers. It was a simple hunt, but anything could go wrong. He tried to convince himself that they were fine, but his mind was running wild.
He wanted to call and check up on them, but he was afraid that he would mess up the hunt. Or they would freak out because he was calling and would stop hunting and run back. But it was storming and he didn't think Sam and Dean should be hunting in this weather. He didn't even know where they were hunting or if they were outside or if there was more than one ghost. He should've asked them before they left. He should call them.
He looked at his phone that was sitting next to his pills. All he had to do was reach out and press the 2 and he'd be talking to Dean in just a few seconds.
He stood up suddenly, but fell back onto the sofa. His vision had gone out when he'd stood up like that. He hadn't been moving much, and when he did move it was just really slow. But he thought moving might take his mind off of things.
Or he could just call and figure out what they were doing and how the hunt was going, and then maybe he could relax a little.
He gave in and snatched up his phone. He had Dean's number dialed and the phone to his ear within a second. He thought about hanging up before Dean could answer, but his older brother would immediately call back.
It only took two rings before Dean answered with a worried, "Alec? What's wrong?"
"Um nothing," Alec quickly replied. "Don't stop the hunt, ok?"
"Ok…What's up?" Dean asked, still uncertain.
"I just…where are you?"
"We're about two hours away, but I can make it a lot less if I need to."
"No, I mean, where's the hunt? Are you outside? Are you in an old house or a church or…what?"
Dean chuckled, "We're in a house, but I think we're gonna have to go outside."
"But it's raining," Alec pointed out. "You're wearing coats right?"
"Alec, we'll be fine," Dean said, a smile in his voice. "We've almost got it figured out, and then we just gotta find the grave."
"It's just one ghost, right?" Alec asked. "There's not secretly more than one that you're trying to keep from me, right?"
"There's just one, kiddo."
"And you're both ok?" Alec asked.
"Yeah, we're both ok. Are you ok?"
"Yeah…I just…I was freaking out…" Alec admitted.
"It's alright," Dean replied. "We'll be back soon, ok?"
He took a deep breath and tried to relax. "Ok…just, um, can you keep me updated?"
"Yeah, I'll keep ya updated," Dean promised. "I'll call ya again in a little bit."
"Ok," Alec said, feeling slightly reassured. He hung up and sank further against the cushions. That small conversation with Dean had worn him out, but he knew he still wouldn't be able to sleep. He wouldn't be able to until Sam and Dean were back.
He kept his phone in his hand and waited.
"Who called?" Sam asked, walking in from another room.
Dean smiled and said, "Alec."
Sam's eyes widened though and he quickly asked, "Are we leaving? Is he ok?"
Dean shook his head and his smile widened, "He was worried about us. He started asking questions about the hunt."
"Really?"
"Yeah, he wanted us to know that it was raining," Dean said.
"Maybe hunting will help," Sam said.
"As long as he doesn't show up outta nowhere…" Dean muttered. It was great that they were hunting again and it was even better that Alec seemed interested, but this could still backfire. Alec would want to help, especially if he thought they were in trouble. He would just have to keep his little brother updated like he promised; otherwise he could pretty much guarantee Alec coming out here.
"We'll just try to finish this up, and then we'll go back before he can even think about it," Sam said.
Dean's phone started ringing again, and he quickly answered, "Alec?"
"I'm ok," Alec quickly reassured. "But where exactly are you?"
"I'm not telling you that," Dean said. Alec could still probably find them; it would just take him longer if he didn't know exactly where they were.
"Dean-"
"Alec, I'm gonna hang up on you right now if you even think about askin' that again," Dean warned. "You're not coming."
Alec sighed, and then grumbled, "Fine…"
"We'll be back soon," Dean said. "Just please don't leave that room."
"Fine," Alec said again before he hung up.
"See. He's already thinking about it," Dean said to Sam.
"At least he wants to do something."
He had paced for a while, but that wore him out. He had eaten what Sam had left him just so he could have more energy to pace some more. He hadn't gotten an update for a long time and he was starting to freak out again.
He wanted to go out and look for his brothers so he could help them if they needed it, but Dean had made it pretty clear that he wasn't allowed to do that. But it was almost seven in the morning; they'd been gone for almost eight hours. Dean's last update had been four hours ago and he'd told him that they were going outside to dig. They should've been back by now. He wanted to call, but Dean's phone wasn't working or something and Sam either didn't have his or it was broken too.
He wanted to go out to find them, but besides the fact that Dean would be pissed, he'd have to steal a car, hotwire the thing, and search the area all while trying not to pass out. He needed to pull himself together.
He was running through a million things that he could do, so he didn't notice when the door started to open.
"Alec? What's goin' on?" Dean asked. Alec spun around, but nearly passed out in relief when he saw his older brother. "Whoa, easy Alec," Dean said, reaching out to catch him. "Easy, easy, I gotcha."
He was sitting suddenly and Dean was in front of him. His older brother was soaking wet, but he looked ok. "What happened?"
"You kinda passed out for a second," Dean said, misunderstanding him.
"No, what happened with the hunt? Why didn't you call? And you didn't answer your phone. Are you ok? Where's Sam? Is Sam ok? Is the ghost gone?" Alec asked quickly.
"Alec, slow down, ok? I'm fine, Sam's fine, the ghost is gone, everything's fine, ok?" Dean said.
Alec slowly nodded, but then asked again, "Why didn't you call or answer your phone?"
"I'm sorry kiddo," Dean said. "Me and Sam both gotta get new phones. The ghost threw us around a little and mine fell outta my pocket and Sam's was crushed. We got back as fast as we could. Are you ok?"
"But you're ok, right?" Alec asked just to make sure.
Dean smiled and ruffled his hair, "Yeah, I'm ok. I'm soaked, but I'm ok. Are you ok?"
"Where's Sam?" Alec asked instead.
"I'm right here," Sam said as he walked in. "What's going on? Alec, are you ok?"
"He passed out," Dean said when he didn't answer right away.
"I didn't pass out. I'm fine," Alec grumbled.
"Yahtzee," Dean said. Alec frowned at him so he said, "We asked you if you were ok three times before you answered."
"You didn't answer your phone," Alec shot back.
"I couldn't answer my phone," Dean said. "Did you eat anything?"
Alec nodded; now that his brothers were back, he was exhausted again. But he had to make sure one more time that they were ok. "You're really alright? Nothing broken, no cuts, or even bruises…"
"We're fine," Dean reassured.
"We just got thrown around a little. Nothing too major," Sam said.
Alec nodded and turned so he could stretch out across the sofa. He could sleep now that his brothers were back.
Dean ran his hand down his face once Alec fell asleep. Sam walked around the sofa and helped Dean get their little brother more comfortable. Dean looked exhausted too, and they both needed to get cleaned up, but Sam was worried about Alec again.
"You wanna shower first?" Dean asked.
Sam looked to Alec and shook his head no. "You go first."
"Sam, you're gonna get sick if you don't change soon," Dean said.
"Dean, we're both gonna get sick anyway," Sam said. "I just wanna make sure he's really ok."
"I actually think he just wore himself out," Dean said with a small smile. "You know, he stayed awake the whole time we were gone."
"But he passed out," Sam said.
"I think he only passed out because he stayed awake for so long," Dean said. Sam still wasn't sure; Alec had been shaking and was way too pale. "Sam, he ate something without one of us forcing him to eat it. Let's take the win where we can get it, ok?"
Sam nodded, "Yeah, ok…"
"Now go get cleaned up, and then you can sit with him," Dean said.
Sam sighed, but turned to the bathroom. A shiver ran through him as he walked and he shook his head. They shouldn't have stayed out in the rain for so long. Hopefully it would just be a quick cold. He didn't want Dean to get sick, and he knew if he got sick then Dean would catch it too. That was the problem with living in the same room. At least Alec wouldn't catch it.
Alec startled awake. It was dark in the room so it must have been night again. He'd slept for a long time. He was surprised that Sam and Dean hadn't woken him up and forced him to eat something. They usually let him sleep for a while, but not for this long.
He slowly sat up and looked around for his brothers. They were both asleep, so he wasn't sure what had woken him up. His collarbone hurt though, so maybe he'd woken up because of the pain. He reached for his pills that were on the table, but froze when one of his brothers started coughing.
"Son of a bitch…" Dean wheezed when he could finally catch his breath.
Alec quickly grabbed his cup of water and brought it over to Dean. "Are you ok? What's wrong?"
Dean coughed some more, but it sounded pretty serious. "I'm fine…just a little cough," Dean whispered. Alec didn't know much about sickness, but this didn't sound like a little cough. This sounded serious. "Shit…what time is it?" Dean asked.
"I don't know…I just woke up," Alec replied.
Dean ran his hand down his face and looked over to Sam who was still asleep. But now that Alec looked him over, he didn't look so good either. He was sweating, but shivering at the same time.
"You're sick," Alec accused. "You're both sick."
"I'm fine, Alec," Dean muttered. "Just go back to sleep, ok?"
"You shouldn't have gone hunting in the rain. You always get onto me about going out when it's raining and claim that I'm going to get sick, but then you go and do the exact same thing," Alec said, ignoring Dean.
Dean started to argue, but couldn't because he was coughing instead. Alec awkwardly tried to pat Dean's back, but he was on the wrong side. His left arm was in a sling and it hurt too much to twist around to use his right hand.
"Alec, I'm ok," Dean whispered after a few minutes. "'S just a cough…"
"Do we have any medicine for coughs? Is that a thing?" Alec asked. He was way out of his element here; he'd never known anyone who'd gotten sick before.
Dean smiled though and ruffled his hair, "You're funny, you know that?"
"Dean, I'm being serious," Alec said. "You're sick and if there's some medicine then I should go get it."
"It'll go away," Dean said. "Just go to sleep, ok?"
"I'm not tired," Alec grumbled.
"Well I am," Dean muttered. He turned and lay down again and was asleep almost instantly.
Alec still wasn't sure; Dean had been seriously coughing, and then he'd tried to play it off that he was fine. He knew Dean wasn't fine, but his older brother hadn't helped him at all when it came to taking care of him.
He looked over to Sam's bed hoping he would be able to help him, but he looked even worse than Dean. Alec got up and walked over to Sam. He reached out and put his hand on Sam's forehead, but he immediately pulled back. Sam was burning up.
He looked back to Dean and wished his big brother would wake up and help him. But he knew a little more about fevers than he did about coughs. Injuries could get infected and infections led to fevers. He knew antibiotics would get rid of an infection, and then the fever would go away, but he didn't know what got rid of just fevers.
"Sam, can you hear me?" Alec whispered. He didn't really want to wake Dean up even though he could really use some help. It didn't matter though because Sam didn't wake up. He was shivering though and they didn't have any other blankets in the room.
Luckily he ran hotter than they did and he didn't get sick. He went to the other side of the bed and got in next to Sam.
"Good thing you don't mind sharing, Sammy," Alec said. He wasn't actually going to sleep since he was worried, but it felt good to sit down again. He was worn out, but at the same time adrenaline was pumping through him. "It's been a while since we shared…" Alec muttered. "You guys always try to make me take one of the beds, but y'know, I don't actually feel like I deserve it. That's why I keep picking the sofa. But you probably already knew that. You seem to know everything anyway so you probably know that too."
Now that he'd started talking, he wasn't going to stop. Sam wasn't listening anyway so it didn't matter.
"You and Dean always seem to know what's goin' on with me…I don't know how you do it, but you do. It must be a brother thing, but I don't get it yet. Maybe I never will. I'm messed up, Sam. I'm more messed up than you or Dean will ever know. It's wrong for you two to care about me, but I promised Dean that I wouldn't take off."
He tried to take a deep breath, but that hurt so he just stopped talking for a minute.
"Sam, I don't deserve this. Any of this," Alec said, anger starting to color his tone. He calmed himself down again, but decided he could be honest since Sam was completely out. "I was ready to die. White had his gun to my head and I was ready. I thought I was dead for a few minutes. I heard a gunshot and I guess I just automatically shut down. Rocky and Bear pulled me outta the way…"
He'd really thought he had been dead when that other gun went off. It'd taken Rocky and Bear a while to get him to snap out of it.
"I know what you're gonna say, you'd sigh and look sad and say 'Alec, I know you feel like this is your fault, but I couldn't stand it if you died.' Save it, ok? Dean already ran that spiel like 20 times and it's not working. The only thing that made me get back up was the fact that White was still alive and I needed to kill him. But I still wasn't good enough. I thought if I could just kill White then maybe I could redeem myself just a little bit. But White took me down like I was nothing. I knew he was superior to me, but I got it in my head that I could be better. Obviously I was wrong and I've got a broken collarbone and broken ribs to prove it."
Sam turned in his sleep, but he didn't wake up.
"Alright, I'll quit bein' such a downer. I know, we should take the win where we can and the bastard is dead. You'd probably say that the win was me still bein' alive, but I don't feel that right now. I feel like a failure and I am. I always have been. But for some reason you and Dean still want me around."
He looked over at Sam, but then decided to focus on the covers instead.
"Alright Sam, honesty time…I-um-you and Dean are the only reason I'm still here. I wouldn't tell you this if you were awake, but it's true. And here's where you and Dean both freak out and hover forever. Which is exactly why I'm telling you while you're asleep. And you're only asleep because you and Dean are both sick even though I told him you guys shouldn't be hunting in the rain. And just so you know, I have no idea how to take care of sick people…"
He got a little more comfortable and waited.
More soon...