A/N: Wow, wasn't that quick? I guess that's what happens when an author is back from her vacation! But anyway, it's based off this song Miku sang called "Hope", and when you read the translation, I wouldn't be surprised if you said, "Why the heck is it called Hope?" Well anyway, enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: IF I OWNED THE VOCALOIDS, I WOULDN'T BE WRITING A DISCLAIMER NOW WOULD I?
I always knew that Rin and Len were closer than anybody I've ever met. I knew that separating them would just about kill them. They loved each other so much that it was impossible to tell if they were really in love with each other, or it was just sibling love. That was what caused all the fan speculation about Rin and Len dating. But that's not true! Rin and Len love each other as siblings, and that's it!
They just really cared about each other so much, and that was it. Although it didn't seem like it, Rin really did care about Len like any older sibling would. She would make sure that he took his vitamins, she would listen to his problems, she would try and do what was best for him, and most of all, she would comfort him as much as she could. Len's love and care was more evident than Rin's. Everyone knew how overprotective he was, how he was Rin's diary, how he would comfort Rin, and how he would do everything he could to make her happy.
They really were the dream siblings any parent would wish to have. Sure, they had their fights every once in a while, but they made up in time. I have to admit, they were so close that even I was jealous of them. The way they could feel each others' emotions, read each others' thoughts, speak and end each others' sentences, trade places, and just be there for each other was something I wish I shared with Mikuo. But I didn't, and that was that.
Instead, I was satisfied with just being the twins "onee-chan". It was great, being able to help them with their problems, comforting them when the other twin was gone somewhere for something, giving them advice, helping them make-up with each other, being there for them, being able to share secrets with them, and being their best friend. It really was the best time in my life.
But then, Len was diagnosed with an incurable disease. It was horrible news for all us, but Rin took an even bigger blow then we did. She begged the doctor to check again and again, and when the news was truly unchangeable, she cried in her brother's arms until the doctors had to separate them and take Len to his room. Rin cried day after day, and I was the only one who was able to comfort her. Soon, all we could do was visit Len in his "room". The doctors wouldn't allow Len outside the hospital at all. That meant no more concerts, no more school, no more visiting friends, no more playing instruments, and no more being there for Rin.
Len did his best to do everything he could for Rin, and Rin did her best to keep smiling and singing for Len's sake. She really did do her best to keep her spirits high everywhere she went, but it was easy to see that Rin would cry herself to sleep every day. It was easy to see that Rin needed Len back at her side, so when the news came home that Len died, Rin finally snapped. She attempted suicide for a week straight, and when that didn't work, she lost all her emotions and acted like a robot. The only thing she didn't lose was the feeling of sadness. She cried all the time and there was really nothing we could do.
She continued to be like this for about 3 months before she could become normal again. But we couldn't bring her back all together. She hardly ever smiled and laughed, she wasn't as demanding or mischievous as before, she refused to sing, and her eyes always looked dull, there was never a sparkle in her eyes. We all thought that we lost not one, but both twins.
Meiko stopped drinking so that she could spend more time Rin, Kaito ate less ice cream and shared most of it with Rin, Gakupo took Gumi over to our house more often, Gumi played with Rin constantly, Luka hung out more with Rin, and I just continued doing my role as Rin's onee-chan. All we ever wanted was to have that sparkle return to her eyes.
~Present Day~
I woke up rather later than usual today. I looked at the calendar on my wall, and I couldn't help but bite my lip. Today was the day Len died, and it was also the day Rin's world got smashed to bits. It had been exactly one year since his death, and Rin still wasn't back to her normal life. I got up and headed over to Rin's room. She wasn't there.
"Of course," I muttered to myself.
Why wouldn't she be there? She was probably at Len's grave with bananas and flowers. Of course, she went to Len's grave everyday! It was the first thing that she did every morning when she got up. I went downstairs to eat breakfast and was surprised to see Rin there, eating some cereal.
"Back already?" I asked quietly.
"Yeah…"
I got a box of cereal out and poured some out for my breakfast. Rin looked blankly at her bowl of cereal, stirring it around with her spoon. I noticed that there was nobody else in the house except me and Rin.
"Hey Rin," I asked, "Where are Meiko and Kaito?" Rin stopped stirring her cereal.
"They went out to Len's grave with me."
"Oh… You guys left without me?" I was sure that Rin would want EVERYONE to go visit Len's grave since today was the day he… died.
"I didn't want to wake you,"
She looked up and I flinched. Her eyes looked so… empty. It really hurt to see them like that. They used to be so full of life too! Her eyes were the only things that we could use as a way to find out how she was feeling emotionally. It was hard to tell now, seeing as now we could only see a sliver of annoyance, or a tiny little shimmer of happiness. The only thing we saw in her eyes the most was her pain, hurt, sadness, and how empty she felt. It just wasn't right. I had to do something.
"Hey Rin!" I said suddenly. Her eyes showed a sliver of surprise.
"Yeah?"
"Let's do something today. How about we take your road roller out and go out to the fields?"
This time, her eyes showed a small glimmer of happiness.
"My road roller?"
"Uh-huh!"
I ran over to where Rin sat, pulled her chair out and yanked her out of her seat. I dragged her over to our garage and opened it.
"Here!"
I handed her the keys to the road roller and watched as her fingers curled around it instinctively. Slowly, she climbed up the road roller and started the engine, and then she waited for me to climb aboard. Soon, we were on the road, heading over to the fields just west of our house. As Rin drove to the fields, I searched her eyes for any sign of emotion. There was a hint of pure joy in her eyes, but nothing else. Still, it was enough to satisfy me. When we arrived, we climbed out on top of the road roller and watched the breeze blow the grass over. It truly was a beautiful sight. I glanced over to Rin and saw her crying. I was shocked. I didn't want her to cry! I just wanted her to be happy!
"R-rin…"
"All I want is to see Len again," she said quietly, "I remember all the times when I visited him in the hospital. Sometimes, he looked so healthy, but other times, he looked like he was in pain. I never liked those memories, but they keep coming back to me! And then, there were those times before Len was sick, when everyone was happy and well. When I remember those times, my heart starts to ache. Sometimes when that happens, I hear this little voice in my head, but I can barely hear it. It's like its struggling to make itself heard. I try so hard to listen to it, but all I can hear is this quiet whispering."
"Rin…"
I held her close to me, and I could feel her snuggling closer to me. I realized that she was pouring her heart out to me, after all these months!
"Miku-nee," she continued, "remember how I told you that Len was my like my light in the dark? Well, when he died, everything went dark. And when I could see again, everything was in black and white. I couldn't figure out where I was. I felt so lost! And then, you came over and started shaking me, and everything went back to normal."
I remembered that time. When we had received news that Len had died, Rin passed out. When she woke up again, her eyes looked cloudy. She kept looking around confused, and then she said something that scared me senseless.
"Where… am I?"
That was when I ran over to Rin and started shaking her.
"Rin!" I yelled, "Snap out of it!"
Eventually, she did. When she saw my face and everyone else's, she remembered that Len was gone forever, and she cried her heart out.
"I always thought that Len and I would be happy forever, but then he died, and everything went downhill. I started crying every day and night. I was depressed. Everyone did their best to cheer me up, but it never really did work, huh?"
I nodded. I couldn't help it, but everything she said so far was true.
"I still remember Len's smile and the way he cared for me. I remember how the way he cared for me would fill my heart with love. But now he's not here to care for me, so I'm going to keep his smile treasured in my mind forever so that I don't forget all the love and tenderness he gave me. Len was my happiness, and now he's gone. I won't be able to see him again, and he won't be able to light up the dark for me anymore."
I stared off into the distance. I understood why she called Len her light. She had always been afraid of the dark, and Len had always been there to hug and comfort her after a nightmare. That was something I wasn't able to do. Turns out, I'm not bright enough to light up the dark for Rin.
"Miku-nee," she said, "did you know that every time a baby is born, someone dies?"
"No… why?"
"Maybe that's why Len died that night. Maybe he died so a baby could be born into the world."
I rocked Rin back and forth in my arms.
"Yeah… maybe that's why…"
"Miku-nee, can we go home now? I'm getting tired."
"Alright Rin…" As Rin drove us home, I thought about all the things she told me today. About how Len was really more than just her twin, about how he was the one supporting her and keeping happy and well. As I thought of all this, a tune was being created in my head, and with that, an idea was created. I smiled. I finally found a way to make Rin happy again. To return that sparkle to her eyes.
*~*
When we arrived home, I told Rin to go take a nap, which she did. After I made sure that Rin was truly asleep, I told Meiko and Kaito my plan. They loved it.
"Not a bad idea Miku! But I think your idea needs two more people in it…" Meiko reached for the phone and dialed.
"Hello? Luka? Hi sweetie, I just wanted to tell you about an ingenious plan Miku has…" As Meiko explained the plan to Luka, Kaito took his cell phone out and dialed another number.
"I already know who the other person Meiko wants to add in to your plan," Kaito said with a wink, "Hello? Gumi-chan, is that you? Ahh! Sorry Gakupo! M-may I speak to Gumi-chan please? …Gumi-chan? That IS you right? Oh good! I thought it might be Gakupo again! Anyway, I need to tell you about this plan Miku has to cheer up Rin-chan…" Then Kaito explained my plan to Gumi. After a while, both of them hung up and turned to me.
"Well," Meiko said with a smile, "Luka is defiantly coming over!"
"And," Kaito added in, "Gumi-chan is coming too!"
"Good!" I said, "Now we need to get ready!" Meiko and Kaito nodded and ran off to get the necessary things for my plan. I ran upstairs and began to create a song in under one hour.
*~*
"Alright," I said looking down at a sheet of paper, "everyone knows what notes to play at the right time, right?"
"Oh come on Miku!" Meiko exclaimed while rolling her eyes, "We're not Vocaloids for no reason, now are we?" I sighed.
"I just want this to be perfect for Rin."
"We all do Miku," Luka said gently, "So that's we're all going to do our best, right?!"
"RIGHT!"
"Alright Miku!" Gumi said excitedly, "Go get Rinny! I can't wait to see her smile again!" I nodded.
"Right!" I headed upstairs, leaving Luka, Gumi, Meiko, and Kaito downstairs waiting.
"Rin!" I yelled, running into her room, "Wake up!"
"Hmmm?" she replied, rolling around on her bed.
"GET UP!" I jumped up and down on Rin's bed.
"Alright, I'm up," she replied stretching her arms and yawning. I grabbed her hand dragged her over to the bathroom, splashing cold water on her face to wake her up. After about three minutes of splashing water on Rin's face, she was finally, truly awake.
"What's the emergency?" she asked.
"There's no emergency," I replied, "Only a surprise!" I her dragged down the stairs and sat her down on a chair in front of everyone.
"What's going on? Why does everyone have instruments? Miku-nee?" Rin looked at me with a confused face. I giggled.
"You'll see!" I ran over to the microphone and took a deep breath. "Everyone ready?"
"Yup!"
"Ok then, everyone, let's do this!"
Kaito nodded and strummed his guitar with Gumi on bass. Meiko began beating on the drums and Luka played on the electric guitar. I nodded my head to the beat, waiting for the right time. When it was my turn, I opened my mouth and a melody came out.
"boku doko shiro kuro zutto tsuduku shiawase dato kimi ga imada waratte ru kie teku iki teru kimi ga imada waratte ru
kimi ni ai takute
mata namida nagasu dakenandarou
kokoro no okusoko toza shita omoide
todoka nai koe ga hibiki atteku
omotte ita watashi ha
anata toiu hikari kie te
nagai yoru ga kuru no ...
yasashi sani michi afure ta
mune no naka tojikome ta
taisetsu na ano egao wo
umare ru shin deku
watashi ga mitsu keta
anata no hikari ha
mou koko ni ha nai
yasashi sani michi afure ta
mune no naka tojikome ta
taisetsu na ano egao wo ...
Where am I?
Here is black and white
All I want is to see you again
I can't stop crying
In my heart of hearts
Brutal memories
And soundless voice are struggling
I believed
Our happiness would last forever
After I lost you, the Light
Depressing nights have fallen on me
I can still recall your smile
Your tenderness fulfilled my heart
I treasure it in my mind
Your precious smile is forever
(Music interlude)
My happiness's gone but I'm alive
While babies are born, some people die
I can never see you again,
The Light I found
You're gone
I can still recall your smile
Your tenderness fulfilled my heart
I treasure it in my mind
Your precious smile is forever"
While Kaito and the others finished their last notes I looked at Rin to see her expression. There were tears in her eyes, but her face was shining brightly with a smile.
"Onee-chan," she whispered, "Thank you." I felt something wet on my cheek and when I touched it, I realized that they were tears. I turned around to see that Meiko, Gumi, and Luka were crying too. Only Kaito wasn't the one crying, he was just smiling that big stupid smile of his. Rin ran up to hug me, and everyone else hugged us, making us one of the biggest hugging groups ever.
"Thank you…" I heard someone whisper in my ear, "Thank you for making my sister happy again…" I couldn't help but look up. What I saw made me want to cry even more. Len was looking down at us smiling and waving. Then, he turned and vanished. I stared down at Rin and Rin looked up at me and smiled. Then I noticed something in her eye. I guess my work really did pay off.
Today was December 27, the day the twins were born.
It was also the day that Len died on.
And it was also the day that Rin got that sparkle back in her eye.
A/N: This has to be one of the longest one-shots I have ever done… But what the heck, the more the merrier! To tell you the truth, I just LOVE sad songs and stories so that can probably explain why I wrote "Little Doll" and "Leave Out All the Rest", but hey, it's the only way I'll be ever to post stuff on here C: So you know the drill, R&R peeps! Flames are welcomed too~