The TARDIS Book: THE TIME IS NOW (Part 5)

Book Three: TO ABDICATE THE KING

Chapter 8: Hacking and Entering


She pushed through the pink door. There was enough pink in the TARDIS to give her a headache. Wasn't it enough that the outside was a pink wardrobe? Being girly was fine, but this was practically shoving it down her throat. She couldn't wait to get out.

"Hello, Bonnibel," she said, followed by a cackle.

"How did you get in here? And where have you been?" the Princess asked her. Seeing the surprise on her face was priceless.

"I've been where you've been, here in Ooo- though I've been around for about a millennium. Oh, I've been watching you on and off again. Funny, how your face changed every twenty years, like clockwork. But that ridiculous bubblegum skin stayed the same shade of pink." She tried to convey her disgust. In response, Bubblegum's face scrunched into a displeased expression.

"A millennium? But you look-"

"Young? I know. I knew a guy. Nothing special... the point is, I'm a queen now. The Vampire Queen."

"Marceline, how did you even get into my TARDIS? It's safety locked!" Bonnibel shouted. It was fun seeing her mad.

Marceline laughed again. She pointed to the wrist strap on her forearm as she explained, "I can hack into any of your dumb safety locks, using my rad wrist strap and my mad brain skills. I used this to latch on to your TARDIS's signal. You know if you aren't careful, you could be blaring that thing out to a bunch of crazy hoblums that could steal your TARDIS from right under that nose you've got stuck up in the air." Marceline felt as if the insults were tumbling out of her mouth. She felt pleased, but slightly bad. She shrugged it off, knowing that it was Bubblegum's fault for being such a snob. Her title was "The Princess", after all.

"Wait, let me see." The Princess said as she walked up to Marceline and examined the wrist strap.

"What exactly does your 'wrist strap' do?" inquired the Princess. Of course she was being skeptical when it came to someone whose rank was once inferior to hers.

"Lots of things, Bubblegum... but the important part is that I can travel any when, any where to and from any when and any where; riding the time vortex and crashing any time and any place I please... As long as it doesn't glitch out on me," Marceline accidentally admitted. She still couldn't stop the glitching completely, but at least she could decrease the glitching rate by 84.6%.

"Don't tell me you've gone back in time to fix anything..."

"No! I'm not insane! I know what that would do to the time vortex! I wouldn't want to wreck my only ride!" Marceline exclaimed.

"I can't believe you built a vortex manipulator," the Princess said, still in shock.

"You're not the only genius in the family, Bubblegum," she said with resentment. The demon-vampire crossed her twig-like arms as she rolled her eyes.

"Of course you were a brilliant child, I just... how..."

"You just didn't see how brilliant. I broke into the Creator's safe to look at the my mother's work, what she didn't finish, and I figured out what they weren't able to. Though it was only after your work on the TARDIS," she revealed, again by accident.

The Princess seemed to be in awe. "You are a creative genius! I would have never thought to have extrapolated the-"

Marceline immediately waved away her big explanation with complicated words and interrupted with, "Yeah yeah, no one really wants to hear us talk about the mechanics of time and space travel. Though they probably wouldn't understand."

"Of course they wouldn't, they don't understand what we've been through. I thought I was completely alone, but here you are. I never thought that anyone-any of our people- survived. And now I have a sister," the Princess said as she lighted up with an impossibly irritating grin.

"I am NOT your sister; I was your servant. And now I'm free from you and the Candy Kingdom. Just because we lived in the same family does not mean we shared the same living experience. I mean, I lived in your basement! We're not even the same species! The only thing we had in common was Achilles." Marceline stopped there as soon as she said it. Saying that name felt like a stab in her heart, and she could tell that she affected Bonnibel in the same way.

"I-I'm so, so sorry. I just- There wasn't enough time to-"

"Yeah, I know," Marceline said before she could continue. Bonnibel could barely speak. She had never seen her speechless before. But instead of feeling happy that she couldn't talk, Marceline felt kind of bad for her. Especially since she was about to cry. Marceline hadn't seen Bonnibel cry much, even as a kid. Ugh, if she cried it would be so awkward and Marceline would feel even worse.

"Agh! Please don't cry. Look, I'm not here to make you cry. You wouldn't want to cry in front of your boyfriend, would you?" Marceline said as she gestured at the human in the room. He stood behind Bonnibel and stared at both of them. In fear and in awe. Probably trying to figure out who was more of a threat.

"Hey kid, you don't have to worry about me," she smirked as she morphed into a howling coyote. As scary as she wanted to seem, she couldn't help but cackle again, interrupting the howl. She stopped laughing and morphed back into her humanoid form. He screamed, but didn't run away. It showed some promise.

"What's your name?"

"Finn," he said warily, inching closer to Bonnibel. Guess he chose a side.

"He's not my boyfriend, Marceline. He's my knight and he's my friend, and I expect you to treat him with some respect," the Princess patronized.

"He's not my friend or a flippin' knight, and you can't expect me to do anything. We're no longer bound to each other," retorted Marceline.

"If we're not bound to each other, then why are you here? What exactly do you want from me?" questioned Bubblegum. Her face had hardened.

"I want you to stop yourself from killing Ice King. You've been alone for awhile now, and I know what it's like to turn against the world. But don't turn against Ice King just yet. He was once a civilized man. His name used to be Simon Petrikov. When I used my wrist strap to escape the Lich War, I didn't grasp the programming system yet. So I ended up stuck here for awhile, right after the Mushroom War. When I met Simon, I was a little girl who had no knowledge of my powers and no knowledge of escape. Simon used the powers of the crown to protect me. But in exchange for the protection of the crown, he sacrificed his sanity. He can't help being crazy, Bonnibel! And besides, deep down he's just a lonely fool. I can talk to him so that he'll free the dog and the boy. I just need you to stop torturing him. Look at his eyes! You've gone too far!" Marceline could tell she was getting to the Princess because she looked softened, like she was about to melt into a puddle of sugar. An interesting visual that popped into her head. Hopefully her thought bubble wasn't showing, because it would tick Bonnibel off again, and there wasn't time for that.

"What do you say? Please- he's saved my live so many times," She paused to lock eyes with the Princess, "and if it weren't for him, I wouldn't be alive. Instead of punishing him, you should be thanking him. I know he's not mentally well, but trust me, he was once a good person. Please, you don't want to become a psycho killer. If you kill him, you'll be just as guilty as he is," Marceline pleaded. She knew she could guilt the Princess with her ethics. Bonnibel was so self-righteous that the vampire could use her guilt against her.

In futile frustration, Bonnibel grunted as she replied, "Fine... you possess a valid point. I shall let him go this time. But he is on strict probation, and you are in charge of him. You'll have to watch him, because I know he'll slip up and you know what I have to do. Oh, and you're coming with us. All of us. I'm never letting you or anyone out of my sight again. No matter how you seem, Marceline, I know that being together is vital to the both of us. Agree to this and I'll save Ice King from turning into dust. Final offer. Deal?" The Princess asked as she extended her arm.

In response, Marceline took her hand and shook it as she simultaneously sighed and grunted, "Deal. Now turn off that machine before our agreement is null."

Bonnibel took out her flashlight and disarmed the Martian Transporter. The luminosiray signals shined through the blueberry-flavored hard candy, and used its decoding skills to override the Martian hardware, unlocking the cuffs. Marceline flew over to the Ice King. She caught him in her arms as he slumped over. His eyes were closed and his body was limp. He hadn't disintegrated, but he was unconscious. He had fainted from the pain.


Jake felt so comfortable, like he was in his mother's womb, floating like a fetus. Did he die? Maybe he was in the process of being reborn. It was like he was in a liquid blanket. Everything turned to black and he opened his eyes. He realized that he had woken up from a dream. He was still surrounded by ice. No, it wasn't ice. He looked again. He was in a glass case. He looked down. He was in liquid alright, but it wasn't anywhere near a womb. He moved his arms and legs. His left ankle was cuffed to the bottom. He looked outside of the glass to his surroundings. Finn was just outside, curled up on the floor sleeping. Jake knocked on the glass.

"Hey!" He said, but Finn didn't seem to hear him, and his mouth filled with the liquid he was in. Surprisingly he didn't choke on it like he could with water. It was like he was in liquid oxygen.

"Hello, Jake," said the pink witch, walking into his view from the side of the room. He assumed this must have somehow been her fault.

"Before I free you, I need to let you know a few things. First, everyone's- everything is fine. Your tests have come back negative for anything so you're in adequate physical condition, though I would tell you to reduce your intake of pork chop apple fritters- but I wouldn't want to make you more upset. Second, you need to know that I'm a time traveler and this is my spaceship. I'm here to protect you and Finn so don't be afraid to see that the Ice King and a friend of mine will be residing with us for the time being. And as you can see, Finn is here in case you feel it is not safe with me. Third, we, Finn and I, have decided to take you with us to the Nightosphere. Understood?"