My first Hamilton story! For those of you who don't know me, I normally post in the Wicked section. I still have a Wicked story in the works, but tonight I came up with this little funny. I got this idea from Wicked_elphaba_fiyero, who wrote a similar story for Wicked.
And no, I don't own Hamilton. That honor belongs to the great Lin-Manuel Miranda, who is sadly gone from the show now! Sad face.
Enjoy!
Your Excellency,
Let me preface this by saying that I am honored to be under your command, and that I would happily die for our cause for independency. However, there is one slight annoyance that I have become acquainted with since joining your rank: the excessive amount of singing and dancing among some of the officers. I am not one to give out names, sir, but if you're taking them, the main culprits are Mr. Hercules Mulligan, Lt. Col. John Laurens, the marquis de Lafayette, and most especially, your own aide de camp, Col. Alexander Hamilton. They sometimes sing, admittedly, about the nobility of our cause, but other times they sing about drinking and revelry. Their four part harmony is very well done, yet very uncalled for. And sir, this would all be very well and good if they didn't sing WHILE WE ARE UNDER BRITISH FIRE. They have sung at numerous battles, most notably our first day here at Yorktown, when I was certain that Gen. Lafayette had been possessed by the Devil himself, he was speaking (I dare not even refer to what he was doing as singing) so rapidly. All I could catch was something about making redcoats redder with bloodstains. It was truly disturbing, Your Excellency!
But it is not just the men who engage in this. Oh no. I remember when we attended that ball last year at the Schuyler mansion, and I saw one of Gen. Schuyler's daughters, Eliza, with a loopy expression on her face and singing to herself like a madwoman! And then that night, I heard Col. Hamilton singing the same song AS I WAS TRYING TO GO TO SLEEP! But it was Eliza's older sister, Angelica, who really frightened me. At Col. Hamilton's wedding, she seemed to be possessed by the same demon that would ensnare Lafayette, for she too had that rapid form of speech, something about Col. Hamilton never being satisfied.
I realize our campaign here at Yorktown could very well secure our victory over the British, but while we are here, please ask the men to cease this ridiculous song and dance routine! It is detrimental to our cause, and to my sanity.
Sincerely,
An annoyed Private
Hope you liked it! Thanks for reading! And didn't Daveed leave today too? God, that sucks!
Cheers,
Elle Dottore