Orochimaru is Secretly Michael Jackson!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Michael Jackson, the song Thriller or the Jackson 5. If I did, MJ would stop sleeping with little boys and Naruto would shut the hell up.

How Orochimaru and Michael Jackson are the same people…

They're both freakishly white.

They're both gay.

They have long black hair.

They both have no nose.

They both like plastic surgery.

They both "like" little boys.

They want to have new bodies.

They do weird stuff that should never see the light of day.

They can do weird stuff with their bodies.

They have their children wear masks (Dosu remember?).

Orochimaru was at it again.

It's a Thriller! Thriller! Thriller, tonight! (Repeat)

It's Thriller! Thriller! Thriller, tonight!

"Orochimiaru-sama!" Kabuto interrupted.

"What is it? Orochimaru stopped dancing. This was bad. It was very bad to interrupt Orochimaru when he was being…himself.

Kabuto adjusted his glasses. "Sasuke-kun…"

Orochimaru glanced over. Sasuke stood there with WTF plastered all over his face.

"What…the hell…was that?"

Orochimaru sighed. "I guess it would come out sooner or later…"

"Sasuke-kun, how much do you know of my past?"

Sasuke glared. "Not much…"

Orochimaru smirked.

"When I was a child, I was a huge sensation in another country. People worshipped me there, and I was the prodigy of the country. Sadly, I found entertainment in boys that the others did not approve…" Orochimaru sighed. "So I found a way to transfer into this world. I began learning Jutsus in hope of one day, living in a body that can be what I once was and not be shamed, while doing what I was doing. You Sasuke-kun, are the perfect one. You have a great voice and body. You are the next vessel for me." Orochimaru licked his lips. "Of course, the only problem is that your voice lacks control. With time under my tutelage, I can make you sing."

Sasuke began backing slowly. "Get away from me you sick bastard."

Orochimaru sighed. "So it has to be like this."

All of a sudden, the Jackson5, er, Sound 4 stood behind Sasuke.

"Nani!" Sasuke spun around.

Orochimaru's smirk widened. "These people, Sasuke-kun, are the Jackson 5. We were a hit back at home." He held up a photo.

Sasuke's eyes widened. "But then Tayuya was a-"

"Shut up you piece of trash." Tatyuya glowered.

Orochimaru spread his arms as if he was about to hug Sasuke. "Come Sasuke-kun. Learn how to sing, and with me, destroy Konoha."

Sasuke glared. "How does Konoha fit into your plans?"

Orochimaru's eyes flared. "Those bastards. They did not appreciate my songs. In return, I made the village Otogakure. If you listened to Dosu's sound waves, you would have heard my songs. Come with me, Sasuke-kun…"

Will Sasuke join Orochimaru? How did Orochimaru bring back the Sound 4? Will we ever hear Sasuke sing? Hell no to all.