Oh, Blah-di-dah-di-dah
A/N: Hello. Second story. This one is about Robin Hood and his gang and the Sheriff (with his famous punch line). The usual Robin Hood goes to rob the sheriff of his money in a creative new way. This will be a one-shot. Hope you guys out there like it! Reviews are always welcome.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Robin Hood BBC (BBC does).
Start:
Robin Hood had mysteriously run out of ways to cheat, and steal from the Sheriff. It was amazing because Robin Hood always had something up his sleeve or hood. He sat there pondering what to do, I mean, money for the poor doesn't grow on trees, it grows in the Sheriff's pocket. It clicked. The Sheriff! He suddenly out of the blue had an absolutely fail-safe and profitable way to get the Sheriff's money without even touching the Sheriff. His gang all stood there looking at the dreamy-eyed form of their leader worriedly. Much (as always) was first to speak.
"Master, I don't like that look in your eye. It always means trouble, and this once I've decided to stay away from it."
"Much, I've just thought of another brilliant plan to get the Sheriff's money." He replied.
"Oh, is it like your last 'brilliant' plan? I spent 1 week trying to pick mud out of my clothing." Said Djaq
"No, it's even better. We got the money anyways didn't we?" he smartly replied to her, "The Sheriff is going to be out of town for the whole week with Guisborne, so Nottingham Castle's all ours right?" The gang nodded. So far this plan sounded ok.
"And the servants don't know when the Sheriff's coming back right? So lads, I say that you all will dress as servants, and Will shall be Guisborne, and I shall be the Sheriff. The servants will be fooled and we will have access to all the tax money. By the time the Sheriff gets back with Guisborne, we will be gone to feed the poor for the whole year with that tax money." Robin elaborated his plan, telling the gang about the costumes they will need, and props when Djaq pointed out that dressing up is easy enough, but playing the part is hard.
"I just think that if we really need to get the money, we should actually act convincing. We can't go all together as the Sheriff, Guisborne, and his servants. Someone will notice and will tell the actual Sheriff, and by tomorrow our heads will be hanging on his chair!"
"Relax Djaq, I've thought of a way to get past that too. We shall spend today acting out our parts, and in the afternoon we shall make a grand entrance to Nottingham. By nightfall, we will be gone with enough money to feed every town within 20 miles of here." Robin said, frustrated that Djaq didn't see his absolute masterpiece of his plan.
The gang had been practicing their lines all morning. They were finally through Nottingham's walls and on their way to the castle. Robin was grinning like mad. His plan was working! Will nudged him to remind him to keep his uncaring face. The guards let them in the castle walls and the gang separated to go to their different places. One thing that Robin hadn't counted on was Lady Marion.
"Sheriff, Sir Guy, I didn't know that you would be coming so early." She said, "I hope that you had a good stay at York."
Robin put on his very best gruff voice and tried not to look at Marion for he feared that his laughing features would give him away. "Yes Lady Marion," he said, "We had an excellent stay in York. Now come come Guy, we have work to do." Robin led Will out of Lady Marion's sight hurriedly.
"Now Will, I want you to pretend that you are in love with Lady Marion, like Sir Guy is."
"What? But she's your girl and she loves you."
"I know but for the sake of fooling people you had better, and it's just for today anyways as soon as I can get into the Sheriff's chambers, we'll be gone with the money." Will assumed that Djaq wouldn't mind due to the fact that she knew that he was only play acting. She didn't even know that he was in love with her, so what did it matter? He crept up behind Lady Marion to distract her from Robin creeping in the Sheriff's chambers.
"Hello, Lady Marion." He imitated Sir Guy extremely well, "How was your day?"
"Extremely good, and you?" she replied courteously
"Tiring. The Sheriff wants to come here again to make sure that no outlaw steals his money. I assume that you would have sent us a letter saying if anyone did, am I correct?"
"Of course Sir Guy." She said. Will looked up at Robin who was grinning and holding up a couple of bags of money. Relieved, he walked toward him, but Marion followed still wanting to talk to him. Then she saw the Sheriff.
"Hello," she called out to him, "Why do you look so happy? You never usually do."
"Oh blah-di-dah-di-dah Marion! I always am like a mushroom, cause I'm such a fun-gi."
"Something is wrong, you are not the Sheriff. Who are you and what are you doing here?" she said putting a knife to his neck
"Relax Marion, it's me, Robin Hood. And that right there is Will Scarlet." Marion looked horrified at being tricked so badly. Then she smiled wickedly.
"Then I must do my duty, GUARDS!" she yelled. Immediately several guards came rushing out at Robin and Will, who escaped out of the castle walls and joined the rest of the gang. Robin smiled lovingly at Marion and waved. Then they all hurried back to Sherwood, joyous and happy at their new record of creativity.
Back at the camp, Djaq was telling everyone that she knew that it wouldn't work, but Robin cut her off.
"Well, we got the money, didn't we?"
"Oh, blah-di-dah-di-dah, Robin." Djaq replied. Laughing at a put out Robin, the gang all celebrated their new victory against the Sheriff of Nottingham.
Back at the castle a very loud "NO!" could be heard followed by a "GUARDS!" and then "GUISBORNE!" Yes, the Sheriff of Nottingham had come back early to check out if his money was missing.