Sorry
Pointless Finn/Kurt thing. (It's basically a one-shot, but it has two different options for the ending, so I made three separate chapters.) Because I just got broken up with. (When I started writing this. It's been weeks.)
I've taken the characters and thrown them into a story. It's not really relevant to the actual story. All of them are high school seniors and Puck and Finn are, you know, super popular, and live that glamorous 'everyone else' life. (You know, 'everyone else' is having sex, 'everyone else' has a girlfriend, 'everyone else' is gonna be there? They're part of the 'everyone else' that gets to have all the fun). And Kurt is Kurt. Flaming, beautiful, feminine, sweet, sensitive, lovable, darling Kurt. :)
And Finn takes advantage of him. Hooooww typical.
Lemon. (Seriously, like the longest smut scene I've ever written)
Language. (Basically just the word 'fuck' here and there.)
Self-Injury. (In the first ending. Along with just some general creepy disturbingness.)
Boy Love. (Duh. KurtxFinn.)
Don't like, don't read.
It was all wrong. Kurt knew it and Finn knew it and even Puck knew it. (Though he didn't know how exactly he'd been dragged into it.)
"Fuck, man. You shouldn't have done it."
"I know, I know! I just... I mean, it was stupid but he was... Uh, I was... I needed him." Finn hedged as his fingers traced the word written on his forearm.
"You didn't need him dude. You needed a good fuck."
"Well... He was a good fuck."
"Don't wanna know! Don't wanna know! Please don't tell me if Kurt is good in bed. I don't need to know. And it doesn't matter anyway. It was wrong."
"What the hell, Puck? After all the girls you've screwed over..."
"Well yeah but... It was different."
"Why? Cause I'm gay?"
Puck paused, wincing slightly. "No. Because you were his first. And you don't love him."
"And you've never done that?"
"No. I've never been any girls' first. Too much guilt. Most of the time they call me after their boyfriend gets the sex and leaves. Or cheats on her with someone else. I'm the one they get to take out their anger on. Not the other way around."
"Oh. Well yeah. Anyway... What should I do?"
"What can you do?"
"I don't know Puck! That's why I'm asking you. You would know."
"Thanks." Puck answered sarcastically.
"Well? I feel really bad. I don't know what to do. We still have two months til graduation. I can't see him every day for two months. I can't look him in the eye after what I did to him. I can't go two months with that weird silence. With the knowing of what happened between us. With the knowing of how much I hurt him."
"Then you shouldn't have done it. Yeah, I think with my dick most of the time. But that other quarter of the time, I'm thinking through what's gonna happen before I do it."
"Well I can't just go back in time, Puck. What's done is done. And I can't do anything about it now."
"I guess you could apologize. Don't know how much good that would do. But you could try it."
"Okay. Should I go over there? Should I call? Should I wait for him to call me? Should I just wait til I see him?"
"Goddamn Finn! It doesn't matter!"
"Sorry."
"Just... The longer you wait, the worse it's gonna be, alright? Keep that in mind."
"I know. It was three nights ago. And it already feels like it's been too long. I'm gonna go over there tonight."
"Alright. Just, uh,be careful or whatever. Don't let the little bitch beat you up or anything, 'kay?"
Finn raised an eyebrow at Puck. He felt guilty for once having the thought of Kurt being his bitch. He hated the thought. It was rude, and disrespectful, and wrong.
"Whaa... Oh. Sorry." Puck confessed
"Yeah."
Later, after he left Puck's, Finn got in his car to head to Kurt's house. Before he started up the car, he called Kurt's cell phone.
He sat there, letting the phone ring and ring and ring.
When Kurt never answered, he left a rather flustered message on his voicemail.
"Kurt... It's me. It's Finn. Uh, look, I know, you're probably not answering because it's me, but uh... I just wanted to come talk to you in person. To tell you that I am so, so, so sorry. And I'll be over in a few minutes."
-Click-
Finn sighed as he started up his car, leaning his elbows on the steering wheel and resting his head in his hands, tugging at his hair despairingly. "God, what have I done..."
His fingers ran over that black markered word on the inside of his arm.
His mind began to wander back to the night before.
From the very beginning, it had been about want. And it had been about Finn. And it had been about sex and lust and hate and obsession. It had been deliciously nasty from the beginning to the end. And there was such a beautiful sense of regret and forbiddenness that had pushed Finn harder and harder, even as he was doing these terrible things to Kurt.
It had been Finn inviting Kurt over with some weak excuse that both of them could see right through.
It had been Kurt saying yes, because he wanted a little piece of the hottest, most popular, most wanted gay guy in the entire school. Who wouldn't? Not to mention, he'd had a crush on him for so long. Even before everyone else knew how awesome he was.
It had been Kurt getting in his car, and his hands on Finn's thighs.
"Oh Kurt, yeaahh..." Finn had gasped as the hands inched further and further up, charging Finn up with sexual tension like a tight violin string. Soon they were stroking over his stiffening cock, squeezing at his sensitive balls, and making Finn nearly lose control of the car more than once.
"Finn, darling, careful. Watch the road." Kurt purred in his ear, like a fucking tiger. "I was... So scared."
Finn bit his lip as Kurt bit Finn's ear.
"Ah, fuck..." Finn whined as he felt his pants get painfully tight, and he squirmed under Kurt's touch.
"What is it, hmm? What's wrong, Finn?" Kurt murmured, he himself getting aroused at Finn's reactions. He'd never done this before. And he was kind of just guessing, and doing what would feel good to him. And apparently, it was working.
"You have the most amazing hands in the world." Finn moaned.
"I know." Kurt said, letting those hands unbutton and unzip Finn's pants, letting them rub up and down underneath his shirt, on his amazing football-workout abs, and down his opened jeans to the equally amazing monster down below.
When they got to the house, Finn had climbed into the passengers' seat, on top of Kurt, and they kissed for the very first time, Finn's tongue quickly finding its way into the other boy's mouth and rubbing up against the other.
All Kurt could do was let him, and try to burn the incredible feeling of Finn Hudson's talented tongue into his memory. Cause this was one thing he would never forget, he thought, as he kissed back and moved his body against Finn's just right in a way that made both of them groan.
Finn pulled Kurt's shirt off over his head and admired him, his light smooth skin seemingly glowing, his bones just slightly showing through, a slightly feminine curve to his hips.
Finn kissed down his neck and his chest, hands teasing through Kurt's hair which had, at some point, lost its normal perfect neatness.
Kurt pulled him back up to kiss him on the mouth again, this kiss fierce, all teeth and tongue and sucking and biting. Kurt's nails clawed into Finn's back as Finn teased his pink nipples with deft fingers, making them harden quickly, as this was one of the most sensitive places on Kurt's body, and having someone else touch them felt amazing.
Kurt moaned into the kiss, and he could hear Finn laugh, but not in a bad way. More in a 'you're cute and it makes me happy' way. Or maybe it was more of a 'this is awesome, and it's nice to know you're loving it too' way.
Finn broke the kiss, leaving his lover breathless, and bit little love marks on his neck.
"Finn...!" Kurt whined, oh so sweetly.
"Kurt... I want you..." Finn said into his neck, after giving him a bright red hickey.
"I want you too..." Kurt had answered, his voice breathy, tone high and needy.
"Inside... My room..." Finn said as he fumbled for the door handle.
"Yeah..." He agreed, easily reaching what Finn was searching for and opening the door.
Both boys stumbled out of the car, unable to take their hands off each other for any amount of time as they made their way into the empty house.
Finn's pants were falling down, and Kurt's were making him walk rather stiffly (which was quite unusual). And the boys found it was harder than it looked to walk and kiss at the same time.
Finn lead him through the house to his bedroom, (slipping off his shirt somewhere along the way) where they had collapsed onto the bed, Finn once again on top of Kurt. Kurt would be his bitch. And Finn would never, ever, ever be anyone else's bitch again. He would never let that happen. Never trust somebody enough to let them do that to him. Especially if they were just gonna leave again...
He kissed the smaller boy angrily, trying hard to get the thoughts out of his mind, and just love Kurt right now. Cause he did. He loved him right now. Loved the feel of his body. Loved the taste of his mouth. Loved the sweet noises he made. Loved the feeling of revenge every time they touched.
Soon Kurt was on top, and pulling Finn's pants off, and working on him again with those magic hands.
"No." Finn commanded, and pulled him forward, making Kurt land ungracefully on top of him and then kissing him roughly on the mouth.
"Why?" Kurt said between kisses made of lustful chaos, "Scared?" He laughed deep in his throat.
"Fuck no. It's just the next thing that touches my dick better be your mouth."
"And what if it's not?" Kurt asked, just as aggressive and forceful as Finn.
"It better be. I don't think you want to find out." Finn answered, playing along with the arrogant game making both boys extrememy horny.
"I think I do." Kurt breathed against Finn's lips, in his most needy tone.
"I think you're gonna be covered in bite marks when I get done with you..."
"I think I just might like that."
Finn moaned in spite of himself and his hips grinded up against Kurt's of their own accord.
Kurt gave an aroused and shaky sigh. "These pants really need to come off..."
"Yes, they do. That's quite vital to my plans."
"Oh, it's plans now. I see."
"Yes." Finn said as he unbuttoned and unzipped Kurt's pants, "Great plans. Plans about my teeth and your skin, and your mouth and my dick." And pulled them down as far as he could reach, "And making you cum so hard you black out afterwards." He gave Kurt a devious smile at that as Kurt stood up to teasingly pull off the rest of his clothing. As soon as he did, Finn pulled him down into his lap, moving the smaller boy's hips with his hands. Kurt caught on very quickly, the probable cause a combination between the reckless force Finn was using and the huge boner he could feel underneath him.
"Ah Finn... Fuck!"
Finn, in response, bit him on the neck, teeth digging into soft skin. Kurt squeezed the other boy's thigh hard, increasing the pressure as Finn bit down harder, until finally Finn stopped and sucked tenderly on the bite mark.
In a move that would look awkward if anyone else tried it, Kurt turned so he was facing Finn and pushed him down on the bed.
"Only fair." Kurt said, leaving Finn wondering for only a second before he attatched his hot little mouth onto his lover's toned chest and left him a nice little bite mark. He worked his tongue over it, the thought of it making his lover grin in spite of himself.
Kurt worked his way down Finn's body, tasting his sweet skin, leaving little love marks and soft kisses from his chest down to his tightly-stretched boxers. Upon finding this last piece of clothing blocking the way, he snapped the elastic softly, teasingly, against the taller boy's skin with his teeth before removing it quickly and looking up at the 'prize' before him.
Before he could think about what he was doing, before he could possibly second-guess himself, he took as much of Finn's hardness into his mouth as he could and was immediately rewarded with a breathless moan from the other boy.
Kurt started to suck on him slowly, experimentally, never having done this before. He figured he was doing something right though, as below him, Finn was gasping and cursing up a storm, not to mention he seemed to be having the most difficult time holding still.
Finn had to admit, of all the great sex he'd ever had, of all the amazing blowjobs he'd ever been given, with all those talented mouths, this one was one of the best. Top five.
Oh God, he's using his teeth. Top three.
In fact, Kurt was having to hold down Finn's hips almost as tightly as Finn was holding onto the smaller boy's head.
If this boy didn't stop, Finn was about to start screaming. Fuck five. This was the best ever. It was like Kurt knew exactly just what he wanted. The way he ran his tongue softly over the head before taking it all. The way he licked up the underside like he was licking up ice cream. And especially the way he'd look up at Finn like he was just a sweet, innocent boy. Like he was doing nothing wrong. That's what made Finn absolutely crazy.
And then when Kurt deep-throated him expertly, Finn couldn't help but explode in Kurt's mouth, no matter how hard he'd tried not to.
And it felt so good that he almost wanted to apologize. But saying 'I'm sorry' was the last thing on his mind as he watched Kurt swallow it all and lick his lips before letting go of Finn and climbing on top of him to kiss him yet again.
As Finn forced his tongue into Kurt's wanting mouth, he couldn't help but think there was something so taboo about the whole thing. Maybe it was the fact that he could taste himself in Kurt's mouth. Maybe it was the fact that normally he was the one giving the blowjob. Maybe it was the fact that it probably shouldn't be possible to get this hard again this fast. Even if Kurt was up to no good with those amazing hands again. Even if he was grinding him just hard enough to tease him, but not actually do anything. Even if it was Kurt's beautiful body on top of his, and Kurt's pink lips against his ear.
"Finn Hudson, I want you more than I've ever wanted anyone in my life."
Instead of bringing his feet back to the ground, this only made Finn higher.
This was that feeling he used to get.
"Really?" He asked.
"Yes really. And I want you inside me right now."
That gave Finn chills, and he pushed Kurt off of him, with a bit more force than was really needed, and reached over to a dresser drawer to grab some lube.
"Whatever you say, darling. Hands and knees." He directed, and Kurt did as he said, more needy and breathless by the second.
It nearly made Finn blush, looking at Kurt's ass in the air like that.
He grinned. 'Mine.' He thought as he smothered his fingers in the cold clear stuff and crawled over to where Kurt was so beautifully posed on the bed.
"Get ready." Finn whispered.
Still, he felt Kurt tense up and heard him whine softly as he prepared him with (all too skillful) fingers.
"S'alright. Relax. Just feel, let me do all the work." He traced over the smaller boy's spine lightly with his other hand and felt him tense and relax around his fingers, with a shaky sigh, making Finn anxious imagining more than his fingers inside that tight heat.
He heard Kurt's breathing slow as he did what Finn said, trying to let go of the muscles that were so stiff and loosening and relaxing his body, which let Finn finger him much more easily.
He could barely catch his breath when Finn added another finger, then another. And then, when he hit that spot, Kurt nearly screamed.
"More, more! Now Finn, pleaaase!"
God, how he could sound sexy when he wanted to.
Finn quickly put lube on his own cock and grabbed Kurt's hips, and entered him, trying so hard not to be too rough. It was his lover's first time, after all.
He would have been nervous, had he been able to feel anything other than pleasure. And if Kurt wasn't making the most beautiful sounds beneath him, as if begging him without words.
He pushed in further, until his full nine inches was buried insde Kurt, both of them finding it incredibly difficult to hold still.
And when Kurt started to move against him, Finn couldn't help but start pounding into him, making Kurt scream a beautiful, arousing, high-pitched, girly scream.
"Kurt... God!" Finn whined, his hips slamming into Kurt, their bodies moving together like a melody and a harmony.
"Oh Finn..." Kurt's voice faded into a breathy moan, and Finn's hands dug into the slim hips, leaving purple bruises and throbbing pain Kurt would feel sometime later, but neither boy cared. When Kurt grinded back into him, making him go even deeper, Finn nearly did something crazy. And then when Kurt gave him a moan that shook him to the core, he did.
He pulled out and flipped the other boy over, pushing him down on the bed and entering him again, so they were face to face and Finn could see the beautiful faces Kurt was making.
He'd only ever topped two people this way. For just a fuck, it felt way too close to be able to look into his eyes, to be able to kiss him softly while they were fucking so roughly.
But that's just what Finn did as Kurt wrapped his legs around him. He looked into those bright blueish eyes. And he let himself fall into the trap of Kurt's vulnerable heart, and he let himself be swept away and hyprotized by those eyes, let them become his whole world. And he kissed him so gentle, like he was kissing him for the first time. Like his lips weren't connected to the rest of his body, which was furiously working on bringing Kurt to the edge, and it was working well and quickly as Kurt's nails clawed into his back and his legs held on even tighter to Finn.
And Finn realized, as he was stroking Kurt's cock in rhythm with his own thrusts, that he liked it better this way.
He wanted to be this close to Kurt. That he was suddenly sure of as Kurt came hard, silently, all over Finn's hand and his stomach, and Finn followed him half a second later, biting into Kurt's neck lustfully.
They were both quiet, catching their breath and not sure what to say.
Finn pulled out for a second time and laid next to him, still unable to take his eyes off of him. What now? Finn wondered. What did Kurt expect? Hell, Finn didn't know what he himself expected.
Kurt winced as he tried to move, and Finn flinched. 'God, I hurt him. Oh fuck, oh damn, oh hell, oh-'And then the smaller boy smiled and curled up halfway on top of Finn.
And Finn couldn't say a word. Just watched him with affectionate eyes and held him gently, lightly running his hands over his back and his neck.
After short moments, Kurt was sleeping peacefully in Finn's arms.
Sitting in his car, Finn was crying. Just as he had that night, long after Kurt was asleep.
Just as he had the next morning when he woke up and Kurt was gone. When he'd found that the only remnants of the night was the five letters Kurt had drawn on his arm. When he'd tried in vain to scrub off that word and he couldn't.
And now, here he was in his car, sitting in Kurt's driveway, not even remembering the trip over here, trying to make the letters stop burning, trying to stop the tears in his eyes before he knocked on the door. He knew he was a mess, but he should at least try not to be a crying mess. That was just pitiful.
He shut his eyes and leaned back. He was gonna do this. He was not going to get out of this one. It meant too much to him.
I wrote two endings. The first is the original intended ending (Everything), and it's very dark and depressing. If you choose to brave it, I wish you luck and bid you to find some tissues. The second (Nothing) is me breaking down and writing a happy ending cause I couldn't stand making the original ending happen. I don't advise reading both in one go, because you'll just end up with all kinds of confusing, overdramatic emotions. But hey, it's a free country.
For the record, I don't hate Finn or anything. And the real Finn, even if he was gay, probably wouldn't do this. Cause Finn's a great guy. :) And I wish him and Kurt could be together on the show!! (Though there's like a .0000001% chance of that ever actually happening)
BTW... Last night was the best two hours staring at my television I've ever had. :) Glee+Adam Lambert=Infinite Fangirl Love! Teehee.
Also BTW. If you find any errors, please tell me. Message me or something. I don't have an editor, and I can't stand when things are misspelled or a detail is off.
Thanks!
