wow its been so long since i posted anything. sorry about that, been at the bottom of the barrel for a time. and even though i'm still there so one has throwned me a rope and i'm slowly bbut surely climbing out! woot anyway in my time of dispare i've wrote some small poems for my fav fan boys and girls. and i have no idea where these are boing but hey. just be thankful i'm not emo lol. anyway here's the first chappy!
everyone is together and their all having prob. now what should they do? but write letters to each other.
Disclaimer: i don't own em. they own me. if u sue me you will only be gettin ripped pages of an old diary :-(
Chapter 1: Finding my Dairy
do you know how many nights while you lie beside me alseep, i stay awake crying?
do you know how many nights i stay awake trying to figure out what i'm going to do with the rest of my life?
do you know how many nights i listen to you breath?
do you know how many nights i wait for you to notice?
to roll over and hold me?
to tell me your going to be fine to talk to me?
i'm tired of you thinking i do nothing about my problems i'm tired of you thinking i sit at home waiting for your calls i'm tired of you thinking i'm strong i'm tired of you thinking i can handle it
i'm a girl i'm frail i'm sad i'm weak i'm sick and i'm tired
why do i feel alone in the same room with you?
why do i feel like screaming every time i try to talk to you?
why do i feel like your not even here?
you say i don't respect you.
but what if i told you i look up to you and want to be just like you?
what if i told you i wish i had your life?
your love?
your family?
i wish i had a sholder to cry on.
i wish i had someone to whipe my tears i wish i had a seeable future i wish i could have an happy ending.
i wish i smile again and it be real.
i wish the lies in my heart would become truth.
i wish my life was a fairy tail
do you know what i would do if i won the lottery today?
i would buy you everything you ever wanted,
i would give you all that you ask for.
i just wish you would stop asking me for tings i'm not ready to give.
i don't want another in this relationship.
i don't care how mean and insensitive that makes me to your wishes i just want you and you alone, to be in a room with you and feel like your hear
i love you, i love everything about you.
why can't you feel the same about me?
am i not good enough?
am i not wrothy enough?
please tell me so i can change for you.
thats what i'd give you, for i don't gamble and wishfull thnking will never help me get you the world all i have to give is me.
sorry if thats not enough.
all i have is my heart
wow nice huh? you think you can figure out who wrote to who? you get to wait 4 chapters till you fine out. thats how i think i will do it. every 4 chappy will be an explanition for whats doing on till then sit back and enjoy these little letters. send me reviews on who you think each pear is. but i will be nice and place in the second chappy who the next two will be about. that way you guys dont set me on fire.