Disclaimer: I don't own Steven Universe

Title: The Ones That Bleed Visibly Hurt The Least

Summary: Connie's first four, real scars. The first is from Pearl; the second, she's gives herself. The third comes from a mission. Pearl's hurts, her's is a distant memory, and the third can be soothed with some healing spit. The fourth hurts both inside and out; this is the one she's most proud of.

Warnings: Mentions of blood and pre-intervention Pearl training. Not fluffy. I repeat; not fluffy.

...

Connie's first scar comes from Pearl. She's eleven.

It's a big honor, she'd decided afterwards. Better someone she knows and trusts than to be left, clueless, to bleed out onto the battlefield (an occurrence that will assuredly repeat itself multiple times before the final blow is someday struck). Even still.

It hurt.

Connie swung her sword hard, heart racing in her chest. Part of her, even now, was terrified of getting hurt; another, larger, part of her was willing to do anything, fight anything and anyone, rather than attack and possibly wound her mentor like this.

It's not real, she tells herself, arms vibrating with the force of Pearl's blocking motion. Gems are made of light. She couldn't really hurt the woman. At least, not beyond repair. And as Steven's knight, it would someday be her job to spill blood to protect him. Hers, or someone else's, it didn't matter. She needed to be ready.

"Focus." Pearl hisses. Her blue eyes held none of the warmth they'd once had, but this is training. Training is different from their day-to-day relationship by far, especially on days like today, when Steven is busy with one thing or another and isn't around to watch the madness happen.

She's breaking, Connie realized. They're both breaking; falling into each other, hurting and crashing to pieces in the confusion, and it's too late to stop it now. A war was just around the corner, and she had to be ready. She had to be.

Being broken means nothing compared to all that would be laid before her after she'd rebuilt; a world of freedom and magic, where it's okay if she toes the line between maturity and childhood, and is somehow respected for it.

But then there's a sharp pain in her side, and Connie falls to her knees, then her rear, with a whimper. A single, perfect cut stretches from her stomach to the back of her right hip. It's not that deep- the gem could have easily chopped her in half- but she felt a spark of fear nonetheless as she presses her hand against it, eyes wide with pain she doesn't dare yell out.

Pearl tutted. "Can you get up?"

She grit her teeth. "Yes, ma'am." Steven over everything. Steven first. "Just... give me a second, please."

The gem blinks at her a long moment before turning on her heel to give the girl some privacy. "I'll go get you something to drink. Liquids are vital."

Connie only vaguely hears the warp pad flare up. All she can think about is the blood dripping onto the arena floor.

Now that she's alone, the fear easily builds into full-fledged terror. The blood gently plinking to the ground makes her stiffen, taking in ragged breathes or air to keep from crying.

"I'm not going to die." She says, speaking aloud in an attempt to console herself. "It doesn't even need stitches."

Pearl quietly walks her through wrapping the wound while Connie sipped at a juice box. She'd brought three total, just in case, and she's exhausted enough to easily drain them one by one.

"Humans are so fragile." Pearl comments with something akin to disgust as she makes the final touches to the dressing. She doesn't take any offense; she knows the gem is just angry about her limitations. She's angry about her limitations.

"Yes, ma'am."

"You know this is only the first of many, right?"

Connie isn't sure if she meant wounds, or scars. "Yes, ma'am."

Pearl fixed her a look, blue eyes burning with things left unsaid. "I could get Steven."

Connie hesitates only for a second, trying to decide if it's a test or not, before shaking her head. Steven isn't an idiot; he's bound to notice it's not a wound from a fall or a scrape. "It doesn't need stitches. It'll heal. I'm fine."

She nods and stands up, arms behind her back. "Think of this as an opportunity, Connie. Humans always believe that they're invincible, that they can't get hurt. You're hurt. This isn't even a battle, and yet you're bleeding. You need to realize your own weaknesses."

Connie swallows. At this age, discovering your own morality is a bit disconcerting. Had she been an adult, they'd call it a mid-life crisis. "I thought weakness didn't matter, as long as I can protect him?"

Pearl nods her head. She seems proud of her grasp of her knightly duties and all they entail. "They don't. The more you know about them, however, the more you can work on and improve. You can't fix your ability to die so easily-" She says with a shrug, as though it doesn't matter, and, in a way, it doesn't. "But you can work on protecting your side better."

Connie nods, a warmth blossoming in her chest. It's nice to know she can be useful, even when she fails. "Yes, ma'am. I'm ready to try again."

This time, Pearl lets a holo-Pearl work her through the motions.

This time, Connie feels no stab of concern as she slices it, right through the stomach, just like the wound on her body.

They both come to their senses later, thanks to Steven, and apologize. Training is never that harsh again. The mark still lingers on her side, perfectly hidden from prying eyes.

Connie sees the concern in her mentor's eyes, and knows, without a doubt, that this is one of those things best left hidden away and forgotten. Not just from her parents, but from everyone. She shouldn't talk about it, for their sakes.

Connie doesn't talk about it.

Author's Note: Howdy, y'all! I just realized that I haven't done any angst in this here fandom- I haven't done angst in awhile, frankly- and I thought, why not?

As I just said, I haven't done pure angst in some time. I have no issue with constructive criticism. Too dramatic? Not dramatic enough? Not really angst and I'm just fooling myself? By all means, tell me!

-Also, to my friend who told me 'bring on the Connie angst.' This is the nicest chapter. =)

-Mandaree1