A Very Hellsing Christmas
by DoomaWriter
Author's Notes: I know, it's not very apropriate timing for a Christmas story, but I thought up the idea and just had to go with it. This story is suppose to be like one of those cliche Christmas specials major television channels waste time rerunning every year. But there's a difference which makes it good! If you've read the title then I'm sure you can already guess what it is.
What's that? No I don't own Hellsing....now never ask again.
Chapter 1: How the Vampire Stole Christmas
It's Christmas Eve. Out on the streets, London is filled with Christmas decorations and joyous people out on the streets. People in coats crowd the stores to do last minute shopping. Everywhere the spirit of the season is obvious. Everywhere except for the cold and sterile Hellsing building.
Being somewhat bored, Alucard decides he'd take the chance to see what the female officer was up to. Alucard's head rose through the ground and laid eyes upon the back of Seras. Alucard was ready to give her a heart attack at the sight of his seemingly decapitated head but something caught his eye and he rose all the way up. She was....decorating?
"Seras." Alucard said with a look of confusion which rarely replaces his smile. She nearly jumped out of her cold skin and turned around.
"M-master! You shouldn't sneak up on me!"
"What are you doing?"
She stared at him in disbelief. "Surely you know what Christmas decorations are! I did start to put them up a little late, but they're still good. You're not that old! You must know what Christmas is."
The smile returned to Alucard. "Christmas decorations?" He placed his hand to his chin and sat on her desk. "Do you really think it apropriate to hang such things being how you are?"
Anger came to Seras' face. She realized Alucard had brought his hand up to show the dark symbols on his glove. "I may be a vampire now but I'm still human...sorta. I can still celebrate Christmas! Just you wait until Santa comes and hands me presents but none for you!"
Upon hearing these words Alucard became quiet. In fact he didn't move an inch for a good five minutes. He then burst out in laughter. "S-Santa Clause!? Don't tell me a woman of your age still believe in such rubbish. Are you still just a kitten? For crying out loud, I only meant that I thought you were Jewish."
"Rubbish? Everyone knows Santa Clause is real! Stay up tonight and see for yourself!"
His laughter calmed down and back into a smile. "Well....I wasn't exactly planning to sleep." With that, Alucard walked backwards and through the wall. Seras looked down upon the floor.
"Is...is Santa not real?......" Her head came up and she gripped her fist proudly. "Of course he's real! Just wait, Master! You'll see!"
Alucard's head suddenly popped back in. "No I won't." Then he was gone.
---
Later that night, the building remained quiet. The only ones awake in the building were Alucard and the late working Integra. Seras had forced herself to lay in her coffin, knowing that one was not to be awake if they wanted a visit from Santa.
In his room, the ancient vampire laid back in his chair, tipping the front legs up and placing his feet upon the table top. He waited peacefully until he began to chuckle again. "Santa....yeah right. Well, why don't I be the first to see the fat man."
A moment later, Alucard was standing on top of the Hellsing mansion, grinning as usual. "Hmm?" His keen sight spotted something in the distance, headed his way. "Intruder...."
---
Inside her office, Integra looked over some important paperwork. I won't bore you with the details. "Jingle bells, Batman smells, Rob- Dammit! I always get these songs stuck in my head. Next time I see carolers I'll let Alucard handle them."
"As you wish." The voice came from behind. Alucard was upside down and hanging from Integra's ceiling.
"Why are you here, Alucard? I'm quite busy."
He frowned. No matter how much he tried he couldn't surprise Integra. Oh well, he'd have to scare Seras twice to make up for it. "An intruder is heading for Hellsing headquarters. Shall I take care of him?"
Remembering the aweful Valentine Brothers attack, Integra was quick to agree. "Yes! Do what you must! I shall permit brutal and unjustified killing."
Once again, Alucard smiled. He vanished back to the roof laughing while his glasses seemed to glow orange. When he appeared to the roof, he reached into his red coat and took ten seconds to pull out his favorite, black, merciless weapon. The flying craft had become quite close. He let off one shot and the unidentified vehicle twisted to its side and crashed....into Hellsing's roof.
It skid across, destroying the top of the building before friction stopped it a foot from Alucard. He looked down at what he shot and a sweatdrop came to his face. "This is....."
---
Inside Integra's office, Alucard sat against the far wall while Seras didn't even try to hide her smile. Integra sat angrilly, looking at the red man in a wheelchair with his arm in a sling and leg in a cast. "Alucard," Integra started. Alucard wanted to disappear but forced himself to stay. "Do you know what a mistake you've done?"
"How was I suppose to know the bastard was-"
"Did I say you could speak!?"
He sunk down and remained silent. Seras stopped her skipping at the sight of her master showing fear. The injured man in red cleared his throat and began. "Its alright, I suppose. I'm not concerned with my problem as much as the world's. I mean, without me, there won't be a Christmas!"
"Ha! I knew it!" Seras said regaining her joy. "You are Santa!"
Integra sighed and focused on the man who was nodding to Seras. "Mr...Uh,...St. Nicholas, on behalf of Hellsing I'd like to apologize for the deed of my trigger happy friend." Alucard sank even more. "But why were you coming this way? There are no children here for you to give gifts to."
"Actually, I've come for your help. The North Pole has a problem that only your organization can help me with."
"Very well. To make up for this, I shall send someone to your...base. And who better than the man in red?"
Alucard looked down and shook his head. "I don't like this at all."
"Ooh ooh!" Seras jumped in. "Can I go too!?"
With a raised eyebrow, Integra asked, "Why would you want to go? You usually don't like my missions."
"Well, you see..." Seras said with embarrassment in her voice. "I...always wanted to see...the little elves in their workshop." Everyone remained quiet, staring upon Seras. To break the silence she turned to Santa and asked him what was on her mind the whole time. "Santa! Did you bring a present for me?"
Knowing Seras was under Alucard's care, Integra turned to him curiously. He was now standing with his head down in shame and his back to her.
"Uh, well you see, child," Father Christmas began, "You weren't actually on my list. My list only contains the names of children. And children who are....alive." Seras hung her head low in great depression. Being the caring person he was, Santa quickly replied, "But I do have a backup gift my elves make for such an occassion."
He reached into the red bag behind him with his good arm and smiled as he pulled out what he was looking for. Seras looked down at the gift she just received. It was a block of wood poorly carved into the shape of a car with four wheels hammered into the sides. "Gee, Santa......thanks."
"But there's still one more problem," Santa reminded them. "I'm out. Who'll deliver the gifts to all of the good little boys and girls around the world?"
Integra felt a cold chill run behind her. Alucard had moved to behind Integra and sported his big grin yet again. "Everyone's off on holidays....That leaves you, Miss Hellsing."
"You smug bastard," Integra whispered as her hand turned into a fist on her desk. "Very well, I shall summon Walter and we'll....deliver...the presents." She looked up to Santa again. "Before I go, tell me, have you sustained any other damages?"
"Well, my sleigh does have this large hole in it. My reindeer have minor cuts and bruises...except for Rudolph who wasn't as lucky."
"How is he?" Seras jumped in.
"I'll tell you when I find all the pieces."
To be continued....
--------------------------------
Author's notes: Well that's it for chapter one. I hope you all enjoy it. Chapter 2 will be up as soon as I get me some reviews. There will be more Christmas action and some more of your of the memorable cast appearing later.
P.S. For those of you wondering, no I am not a blasphemous heathen or an aethiest.
Author's Notes: I know, it's not very apropriate timing for a Christmas story, but I thought up the idea and just had to go with it. This story is suppose to be like one of those cliche Christmas specials major television channels waste time rerunning every year. But there's a difference which makes it good! If you've read the title then I'm sure you can already guess what it is.
What's that? No I don't own Hellsing....now never ask again.
Chapter 1: How the Vampire Stole Christmas
It's Christmas Eve. Out on the streets, London is filled with Christmas decorations and joyous people out on the streets. People in coats crowd the stores to do last minute shopping. Everywhere the spirit of the season is obvious. Everywhere except for the cold and sterile Hellsing building.
Being somewhat bored, Alucard decides he'd take the chance to see what the female officer was up to. Alucard's head rose through the ground and laid eyes upon the back of Seras. Alucard was ready to give her a heart attack at the sight of his seemingly decapitated head but something caught his eye and he rose all the way up. She was....decorating?
"Seras." Alucard said with a look of confusion which rarely replaces his smile. She nearly jumped out of her cold skin and turned around.
"M-master! You shouldn't sneak up on me!"
"What are you doing?"
She stared at him in disbelief. "Surely you know what Christmas decorations are! I did start to put them up a little late, but they're still good. You're not that old! You must know what Christmas is."
The smile returned to Alucard. "Christmas decorations?" He placed his hand to his chin and sat on her desk. "Do you really think it apropriate to hang such things being how you are?"
Anger came to Seras' face. She realized Alucard had brought his hand up to show the dark symbols on his glove. "I may be a vampire now but I'm still human...sorta. I can still celebrate Christmas! Just you wait until Santa comes and hands me presents but none for you!"
Upon hearing these words Alucard became quiet. In fact he didn't move an inch for a good five minutes. He then burst out in laughter. "S-Santa Clause!? Don't tell me a woman of your age still believe in such rubbish. Are you still just a kitten? For crying out loud, I only meant that I thought you were Jewish."
"Rubbish? Everyone knows Santa Clause is real! Stay up tonight and see for yourself!"
His laughter calmed down and back into a smile. "Well....I wasn't exactly planning to sleep." With that, Alucard walked backwards and through the wall. Seras looked down upon the floor.
"Is...is Santa not real?......" Her head came up and she gripped her fist proudly. "Of course he's real! Just wait, Master! You'll see!"
Alucard's head suddenly popped back in. "No I won't." Then he was gone.
---
Later that night, the building remained quiet. The only ones awake in the building were Alucard and the late working Integra. Seras had forced herself to lay in her coffin, knowing that one was not to be awake if they wanted a visit from Santa.
In his room, the ancient vampire laid back in his chair, tipping the front legs up and placing his feet upon the table top. He waited peacefully until he began to chuckle again. "Santa....yeah right. Well, why don't I be the first to see the fat man."
A moment later, Alucard was standing on top of the Hellsing mansion, grinning as usual. "Hmm?" His keen sight spotted something in the distance, headed his way. "Intruder...."
---
Inside her office, Integra looked over some important paperwork. I won't bore you with the details. "Jingle bells, Batman smells, Rob- Dammit! I always get these songs stuck in my head. Next time I see carolers I'll let Alucard handle them."
"As you wish." The voice came from behind. Alucard was upside down and hanging from Integra's ceiling.
"Why are you here, Alucard? I'm quite busy."
He frowned. No matter how much he tried he couldn't surprise Integra. Oh well, he'd have to scare Seras twice to make up for it. "An intruder is heading for Hellsing headquarters. Shall I take care of him?"
Remembering the aweful Valentine Brothers attack, Integra was quick to agree. "Yes! Do what you must! I shall permit brutal and unjustified killing."
Once again, Alucard smiled. He vanished back to the roof laughing while his glasses seemed to glow orange. When he appeared to the roof, he reached into his red coat and took ten seconds to pull out his favorite, black, merciless weapon. The flying craft had become quite close. He let off one shot and the unidentified vehicle twisted to its side and crashed....into Hellsing's roof.
It skid across, destroying the top of the building before friction stopped it a foot from Alucard. He looked down at what he shot and a sweatdrop came to his face. "This is....."
---
Inside Integra's office, Alucard sat against the far wall while Seras didn't even try to hide her smile. Integra sat angrilly, looking at the red man in a wheelchair with his arm in a sling and leg in a cast. "Alucard," Integra started. Alucard wanted to disappear but forced himself to stay. "Do you know what a mistake you've done?"
"How was I suppose to know the bastard was-"
"Did I say you could speak!?"
He sunk down and remained silent. Seras stopped her skipping at the sight of her master showing fear. The injured man in red cleared his throat and began. "Its alright, I suppose. I'm not concerned with my problem as much as the world's. I mean, without me, there won't be a Christmas!"
"Ha! I knew it!" Seras said regaining her joy. "You are Santa!"
Integra sighed and focused on the man who was nodding to Seras. "Mr...Uh,...St. Nicholas, on behalf of Hellsing I'd like to apologize for the deed of my trigger happy friend." Alucard sank even more. "But why were you coming this way? There are no children here for you to give gifts to."
"Actually, I've come for your help. The North Pole has a problem that only your organization can help me with."
"Very well. To make up for this, I shall send someone to your...base. And who better than the man in red?"
Alucard looked down and shook his head. "I don't like this at all."
"Ooh ooh!" Seras jumped in. "Can I go too!?"
With a raised eyebrow, Integra asked, "Why would you want to go? You usually don't like my missions."
"Well, you see..." Seras said with embarrassment in her voice. "I...always wanted to see...the little elves in their workshop." Everyone remained quiet, staring upon Seras. To break the silence she turned to Santa and asked him what was on her mind the whole time. "Santa! Did you bring a present for me?"
Knowing Seras was under Alucard's care, Integra turned to him curiously. He was now standing with his head down in shame and his back to her.
"Uh, well you see, child," Father Christmas began, "You weren't actually on my list. My list only contains the names of children. And children who are....alive." Seras hung her head low in great depression. Being the caring person he was, Santa quickly replied, "But I do have a backup gift my elves make for such an occassion."
He reached into the red bag behind him with his good arm and smiled as he pulled out what he was looking for. Seras looked down at the gift she just received. It was a block of wood poorly carved into the shape of a car with four wheels hammered into the sides. "Gee, Santa......thanks."
"But there's still one more problem," Santa reminded them. "I'm out. Who'll deliver the gifts to all of the good little boys and girls around the world?"
Integra felt a cold chill run behind her. Alucard had moved to behind Integra and sported his big grin yet again. "Everyone's off on holidays....That leaves you, Miss Hellsing."
"You smug bastard," Integra whispered as her hand turned into a fist on her desk. "Very well, I shall summon Walter and we'll....deliver...the presents." She looked up to Santa again. "Before I go, tell me, have you sustained any other damages?"
"Well, my sleigh does have this large hole in it. My reindeer have minor cuts and bruises...except for Rudolph who wasn't as lucky."
"How is he?" Seras jumped in.
"I'll tell you when I find all the pieces."
To be continued....
--------------------------------
Author's notes: Well that's it for chapter one. I hope you all enjoy it. Chapter 2 will be up as soon as I get me some reviews. There will be more Christmas action and some more of your of the memorable cast appearing later.
P.S. For those of you wondering, no I am not a blasphemous heathen or an aethiest.