Synopsis: Short Kabuto bashing fic. Extreme OOCness. If you are a Kabuto Fan, do not read this.
Kabuto sat with Orochimaru. Both of them just stared at each other, until Kabuto couldn't hold it in any longer. "MY GAWD, YOU'RE SOOOOO SEXY!" Kabuto screamed, giving Orochimaru a long, passionate kiss on the lips. "Forget about Sasuke. Get inside MY body!" Orochimaru sighed. "Kabuto, I already raped you when you this morning. You don't get a second serving." Kabuto's lower lip quivered. "B-but Orochimaru-sama!" Orochimaru stood up. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a date with Sasuke. We're going to a fancy restaurant specifically for crazy old guys and their teenage prey!" Singing, Orochimaru strode off. After Orochimaru had left the room, Kabuto began to cry. "I want some male company!" He broke down sobbing, hugging a plushie of himself which read OROCHIMARU'S BIOTCH. He sat sobbing for a little while until calming himself. "You know," he cackled, "maybe I'll just knock out the dog guy again-Kiba something or other- and rape his unconscious body. Yes… I'll drag it back here!" He began cackling maniacally.
Kabuto made his way to the Hidden Leaf Village and hid in a tree, where he saw Kiba talking to his dog, Akamaru, about something. Oh, he's wearing that cute black jacket with the stripe. Me like! Kabuto giggled to himself. Dropping down, he covered his hand in chakra and struck Kiba in the chest, knocking him and Akamaru out in the process. "My plan succeeded! Yes!" Laughing, he grabbed Kiba's body, slung it over his shoulder, and carried it back to Otogakure.
The first thing Kiba saw was quite blurry. It took a few seconds for his vision to clear and reveal he was in a room of some kind. "Ugh… what the hell…?" He turned his head and saw Akamaru chained to the wall. "Akamaru! What happened?" Akamaru replied. "Arf!" Which translated to: that crazy pedophile Kabuto knocked us out again and dragged us back here. He chained me to a wall, and uh… did something to you before locking you in here. "Huh?" Kiba craned his head. "What are you…" He suddenly felt a cool breeze. Horrified, he looked at himself. "WHERE THE HELL ARE MY CLOTHES?!" After looking at himself at shock, Kiba popped a vein. "Don't tell me: he raped me?" Whimpering, Akamaru nodded his head. "Arf!" Translation: He forced me to watch. I was scarred for life. Growling, Kiba looked around until he saw his clothes in a pile on the floor. Grumbling, he pulled them back on. As he freed Akamaru from the chains, he growled. "Lousy bastard… If I ever get my hands on…" "OH KIBA-KUUUUNNNN!" Startled at the trilling voice, they turned around to find Kabuto in nothing but a thong. "Let's have some more fun!" Growling angrily, Kiba crouched down. "Come on, Akamaru!" Akamaru leapt on top of him and transformed into an exact copy. "Gaatsuuga!" They spun at high speeds and charged at Kabuto, tearing him to shreds. After finishing the attack, Kiba looked down at the mess that used to be Kabuto. "Don't EVER…" Kiba kicked him for emphasis. "…rape me again. OKAY?!" Kicking down the door, he and Akamaru dashed out, back to Konoha.
Later that night, Orochimaru came back from his date. "Oh Kabuto! I changed my mind, I'll…" He stepped into Kabuto's room and noticed the indescribable mess on the floor. "O-orochimaru-sama…" "Kabuto?!" Orochimaru squealed in shock. Kabuto rasped. "I-I'm going straight."
And that's that! In case you can't tell, I hate Kabuto with a passion. Why? He knocked Kiba out during the Chunin Exam. Why couldn't it have been Ino, or Tenten, or some other character? I think Kishi-sensei has it out for Kiba. Anyway, read and review!