A/N: Hey everyone! So, I first started this is my fanfic in 2012. Six years later, I'm back again to continue with this story. I'm sure many of you (if you're still around) will be shocked with the update notification for this one! :P

I hope my abandonment of this story has not lost me your readership, and hopefully with a new perspective and new motivation I can finally finish this story. I promise to shorten update times (anything less than six years between chapters will be an improvement).

Leave a review if you remember this story from six years ago. Leave a review if you're new! I would love to hear all your feedback and your opinions on where the story should go. Read on!

"Isabella Swan?"

I looked up from picking at my chipped nail polish into the tired eyes of a very short, timid looking doctor in a white lab coat.

"Bella." I corrected him.

I attempted to give him a smile, but I was too tired to put in too much of an effort and quickly gave up. He returned my grimace with a similarly forced raise of the corners of his mouth and reached his hand out toward me. "Bella." He repeated as he shook my hand firmly. "My name is Doctor Jenks."

Doctor Jenks reached up with his index finger towards his nose and pushed up his wire-rimmed glasses which immediately slid back down to their origin. "So, you are here with complaints of chest pain?" He asked while consulting the folder he had just picked up from the corner table of the examination room. I briefly watched his eyes flicker over the details of my medical history before I nodded my affirmation.

The room was tiny, with barely enough room for the examination table I was now perched on, to the small desk in the corner that was littered with papers and medical books, and a small window on the wall to my left, which overlooked Forks Community Hospital parking lot. The rain was still pounding down, battering against the window pane with an ominous thundering. But that was not unusual here in Forks.

"Did you come here alone today?" He questioned me, and I snapped my attention from the window back to Doctor Jenks. I fiddled with the sleeve of my shirt before answering him.

"Yes. I didn't want to concern anyone until I knew if there was something to be concerned about." Not that there were many people I could tell. My father, Charlie. My mother, Renee, I suppose, even though she lived in Phoenix. Maybe my colleague, Jessica, would have come with me if I had asked.

Doctor Jenks made a sound of agreement as he unwrapped a stethoscope from around his neck. "Alright then. I'll do a quick exam and we'll go from there, okay?"

He placed the stethoscope in his ears and raised the chest piece to me. "This will be a little cold." He slid the metal piece under the back of my plaid shirt and pressed into my skin. I shivered involuntarily as the icy metal touched my back.

Doctor Jenks stayed silent for a few moments as he moved the piece to different spots around my back, and then my chest. Although his silence worried me, I, too, remained quiet as he worked.

When he pulled away from me and returned the stethoscope to around his neck. He picked up the folder he had held earlier and scribbled down a few notes before looking up at me. "Okay. I seem to detect a slight heart murmur." He took a seat in the dilapidated black swivel chair, swinging around to place the folder back on his desk before rotating back to look at me. His actions struck me as near comical, but yet I couldn't find any energy inside me to vocalise any humour.

Suddenly realising what he had said, I felt my pulse speed up but tried to appear calm. "And what does that mean, exactly?" I inquired as I dug my fingernails into my palm, the resulting half-crescent impressions acted as a reminder to stay in control. Doctor Jenks adjusted his glasses again and gave me a reassuring smile. "It may be nothing. Sometimes these things can be totally benign. However, with your complaints of chest pain, I would like to be sure that this isn't anything serious."

I swallowed and nodded, tapping my foot lightly against the metal rail of the examination bed. "How do we make sure it isn't anything serious?" I arranged my hands in my lap as I spoke and looked down into Doctor Jenks's eyes as I waited for his reply.

"I would like to take a blood sample, as well as perform an echocardiogram, which will give us a better picture of what is going on in your heart." As he spoke, I tried to make sense of his words. This was probably nothing. He said it could be totally innocent, right? I had nothing to worry about.

"What's an echocardiogram?" I asked. Doctor Jenks ran a hand through his thinning hair and took a breath.

"Well, an echocardiogram, or an 'echo' is basically a sonogram of the heart. A trained sonographer will perform the test, in which an instrument is placed on your ribs near the breast bone and directed toward the heart. The machine will create a moving picture of the heart, similar to an ultrasound scan received during pregnancy." He looks up at me to make sure I understand him. I nodded quickly and he continued.

"I will then look at the results of the test and get a better idea of what is going on inside your heart." I crossed my legs quickly, aware of how my constant movements were making my nerves much to obvious. Pull it together, Bella. "Okay." I sighed.

When he had finally finished taking the samples, and the room had sufficiently been filled with the horrid scent of rust and blood which turned my stomach, Doctor Jenks stood quickly and offered me yet another smile. "You can wait here. I will send in the sonographer in a few minutes." As Doctor Jenks turned and left with my blood, I adjusted my position on the crinkly paper covering the exam table, allowing myself a moment to consider what I had been told.

A heart murmur. What did that mean? I had no idea. I didn't have a clue about medicine. The only information I knew was from sleazy medical dramas and I'm pretty sure most of that stuff was made up. Doctor Jenks didn't seem very concerned about the heart murmur, did he? It could be totally benign, he said so himself.

This thought would be more comforting if it weren't for the searing chest pains I had been experiencing over the last few months. They started out quite mild, no worse than bad heartburn. But they slowly escalated into pain so brutal I would believe I was being stabbed in the chest with red-hot pokers.

I had kept this pain to myself, of course. I lived alone, and Charlie had enough on his plate as chief of police. I didn't want to worry him. As much as it pained me to admit it, Charlie relied on me. I was often back home, cooking for him, cleaning for him. Sure, he knew how to fry up a packet of bacon, and pick up the phone to order take-out, but it was mainly up to me to make sure he at least got some nutrients into him. He had lived alone ever since my mother left for Phoenix with me when I was only a baby.

I was very grateful to Charlie, though, even if I didn't tell him very often. He had taken me in after I left my Mom and her new husband Phil in Phoenix to join him in Forks when I was seventeen years old.

Mom hadn't asked me to leave, but I knew it was what was best for everyone involved. Mainly since my leaving meant my mother could travel the country with Phil and his baseball team. Minor league, of course.

Although I missed the sweltering sun in Phoenix, I eventually came to love the cool, crisp air of Forks. I even came to enjoy living with Charlie. We were actually very well-suited to each other. Neither one of us liked to talk about our feelings or to get emotional, things Renee constantly did. When I had moved out on my own only last year, it was the guilt that had pushed me so often to return and continue to care for him.

Charlie tried his best. He was very protective, which I suppose was to be expected from him, considering his job as chief of police. Although he didn't see much action here in the small town of Forks, he had been around long enough to see some pretty horrible crimes, and what some violent criminals were capable of.

Unfortunately, this meant Charlie was very cautious when it came to boys showing an interest in me. Not that it happened often, though. I was unbelievably clumsy and totally awkward around members of the opposite sex. I was never the pretty girl or the popular girl. Only Charlie's best friend's son, Jacob, had expressed an interest in me when I first moved to town. I tried to show him I wasn't interested, but after a while, I gave in. He was attractive, I suppose. I didn't really see the point in turning him down anymore. We dated briefly before I found him in bed with another girl from La Push, the reservation where he lived with his dad. It should have broken my heart and torn me to pieces; in fact, it did the opposite. It revealed to me I had never cared for Jacob as more than a friend, and what we had shared was not a real relationship.

I felt like I had not yet lived my life at all. No real relationships. No adventure. My Saturday nights consisted of reading manuscripts for work and cooking Bolognese. Now here I am, twenty-three years old, and sitting in a doctor's office with a heart murmur.

My internal monologue was interrupted by a nurse entering the room. She looked to be in her forties, with blonde hair and laugh lines. In her hand, she carried a scrap of material which held out to me. "Isabella Swan?"

"Bella." I corrected once again as I accepted the fabric from her and opened it up to reveal a hospital gown.

"You will need to remove all the clothing on the upper half of your body and wear this." She told me with a kind smile. I nodded at her words and started unbuttoning my shirt as she walked out of the room. "The sonographer will be in with you in a moment." She called, her back to me.

"Thanks," I called back as the door shut with a soft click. I removed my bra, Old Faithful, and slipped the gown over my head, buttoning it at my shoulder.

I lay back down on the examination table and waited. No more than a minute later, there was a tap at the door. I gave the knocker permission to enter and a man of average height and mousey hair in lilac scrubs entered the room, pulling a piece of machinery on wheels behind him.

"Isabella Swan?" He asked as he pulled the machinery to a stop beside the examination table. I didn't bother to correct him as I had with my other two visitors, and merely nodded. He extended his hand for me to shake as he introduced himself. "My name is James. I'll be performing your echo today."

I took a deep breath and lay back on the table. James switched on the machine which spurred to life with a monotonous hum. He sat down in the black swivel chair Doctor Jenks had occupied minutes earlier, and scooted closer to the table I was lying on.

"I'm going to attach these to your chest and shoulders" He held up some transparent patches attached to wires as he spoke. "They're called electrodes, and they'll monitor your EKG during the echo."

I didn't even bother asking what my EKG was as James stuck the patches to my shoulders after I unbuttoned the hospital gown. I was awkwardly aware of revealing my chest to a stranger, scrunching my face with embarrassment as I considered the mere two people before James who had had the exceptional luck of viewing my lady-lumps. I didn't have time to giggle at my own self-titled breasts, before my feelings of awkwardness were quickly encumbered by a feeling of nervousness as James prepared to put some sort of gel on my chest. What if something really was wrong?

"I'm going to need you to take some deep breaths for me, Isabella," James said as he smeared the gel across my chest. I followed his instructions as he placed the ultrasound against my chest, gliding its smoothly through the gel. "Bella." I said quickly, looking quickly to James' face, some part of me desperately wanted to humanise myself to him.

He looked back at me, sensing my nerves and tilted his head in pity. "Bella," he confirmed.

James moved the device around a few times, and I watched in amazement as a fuzzy black and white picture appeared on the monitor of the machine. "That", James said as he pointed at the screen, "is your heart".

I watched in amazement as he moved the wand around and got pictures of the heart from several angles. The exam took much longer than I thought it would, over half an hour, judging by the clock mounted on the wall above the door.

James worked in silence, only speaking to ask me to take a deep breath or turn on my side. He studied the picture on the monitor intently and I tried not to panic over the serious expression on his face. Pull yourself together, Swan.

As he clicked off the machine and handed me some blue paper towels to clean the gel from my chest, I glanced nervously to the clock once again. It was almost six, the time Charlie would be heading home from the station. I had promised to meet him at home tonight and cook him my famous mushroom ravioli.

"I'm going to go print off your scans and give them to Doctor Jenks to examine. It shouldn't take too long. You can have a moment to get changed in here but then you can wait in the waiting room until Doctor Jenks has finished." James' serious expression still hadn't faded from when he had first studied the pictures of my heart on the monitor.

I tried not to panic for what felt like the millionth time and mutely nodded at James' retreating figure.

After about a half an hour and a call to Charlie to tell him I was in Port Angeles doing a bit of shopping and running late home in the evening traffic (an obvious lie, I was notoriously against spending more than ten minutes in a store), a stop to the coffee shop in the lobby of the small hospital, and a thorough examination of all the posters pasted across the deserted waiting room walls, the nurse who gave me the hospital gown earlier called my name to meet again with Doctor Jenks.

As I followed her toward Doctor Jenks' official office, I ran my fingers along the walking-aid handles mounted along the corridor walls, distracting myself from the note of sympathy her eyes held.

That can't be good.

Doctor Jenks stood as I entered the small room and extended his hand to a brown cushioned chair that had been placed in front of his wide mahogany desk, gesturing for me to take a seat.

As I sat, so did Doctor Jenks. The nurse stayed in the room, but stood behind me, beside the door, where I couldn't see her.

"Now, Bella, I'd like to ask you a few questions before we proceed. Alright?" Doctor Jenks' eyes were less expressive than the nurse's, much more difficult to read. "Okay." I agreed, trying to hide my scrutiny as I waited for him to begin.

Doctor Jenks nudged his glasses higher up on his nose again, an obvious frequent habit of his, as he consulted the file he had been examining in earlier. "Do you often find yourself short of breath?" I tilted my head to the side as I considered his question.

Yes, actually. I short trip up a flight of stairs usually left me winded. But doesn't everyone get that?

"Yes." Doctor Jenks scribbled something into the file and looked up at me again. "Do you ever feel fatigued, or weak?" Totally. Only an hour ago I could barely muster up the strength to manipulate my facial muscles into a smile, for God's sake. "Yes." I repeated and Doctor Jenks returned to his file and wrote something in.

"And your chest pain. How long have you been experiencing it?" I pursed my lips and ran a hand through my dark brunette hair as I thought. "About three months or so. It's been gradually getting worse."

"Any loss of appetite?" He asked. "Yes." I replied, thinking back over the past few months. I had been slowly losing weight because of my lack of eating. Charlie had expressed concern for these fad diets he has seen exposés on in the evening news. Little did he know, the last thing I wanted was to continue to lose so much weight.

"Do you know of any family history of heart disease?"

Heart disease?

"Not that I know of." I eyed Doctor Jenks wearily as he continued to write in his folder. "Why?" I questioned.

Doctor Jenks's head snapped up. He looked at me for a moment before he took a deep breath and released it, and set the file back on his desk.

"Bella. I'm terribly sorry, but you appear to have a heart condition known as dilated cardiomyopathy."

I felt my blood run cold as his words settled in. A heart condition? This has got to be some kind of joke. I am twenty-three years old. I don't drink, often, my internal voice corrected. I don't do drugs, I've never even smoked a cigarette. I am the picture of health. I go for walks, I eat healthily. Ish… if you consider pasta healthy.

Shut up! I'm kind of having a life-changing moment here.

"And... wh- what does that mean?" It sounded like my voice was coming from somewhere else as I watched Doctor Jenks lean forward to rest his forearms on his thighs.

"Basically, it means your heart is enlarged, and very weak. It can't properly pump enough blood around your body." I tried to take in his words as he spoke, but all I heard was a low buzzing.

A heart condition.

"Is it.. can it be- is it serious?" I stammered out.

Doctor Jenks tilted his head to the side. "I'm afraid so. Your condition is... advanced. We can slow down your symptoms and keep you out of the hospital for as long as possible, if you reduce your salt intake and limiting how much you drink. We will also prescribe you some medication to stop you from going into heart failure."

Heart failure!

"Heart failure?" I squeaked, eyes wide. Doctor Jenks nodded sadly. "I'm sorry, but it is likely over time, your heart will deteriorate even further, and eventually, it will give up."

I felt my stomach sink and I tried to stop tears from falling. "So... you're saying... I'll die?" My voice was no louder than a whisper. Charlie. What would happen to him when I was gone? Who would look after him?

"Death is not the only outcome. If you take your medication responsibly and follow my instructions, you can probably live healthily at home for at least a few years, before your heart is too weakened to support you any longer."

The tears were still welling up, but I still didn't let them fall. "What happens after my heart doesn't work anymore?" I whispered, the feeling of anxiety brewing in my stomach. What about Renée? She's so child-like and hare-brained, how would she deal with my death? Doctor Jenks released a breath and looked at me. "Unfortunately, you don't have many options. You will have to be brought into the hospital where you can be monitored constantly."

I felt my jaw drop. "For the rest of my life?" His words shocked me. That's it? A possible few years at home before I have to spend the rest of my life in a hospital bed?

Doctor Jenks was shaking his head before I finished speaking. "We have options. We can insert a pacemaker into your chest which will regulate your heartbeat. We can also connect you to a machine known as an LVAD. Or, failing these things, a transplant is always an option." Doctor Jenks studied me as I took in his words.

"A heart transplant?!" I exclaimed. My eyes were wide as I considered this. This was obviously much more serious than I thought. A new heart. Whoa.

I watched as Doctor Jenks nodded sympathetically. "I'm very sorry." He pushed his glasses up his nose again, and I tried to not be pissed off by his annoying habit. Pull it together, Swan. It's not his fault you have a bum heart.

"Of course until this happens, you will have to visit the hospital for regular check-ups, to make sure we keep on top of things." My eyes dropped to my hands and I swallowed hard. Get a grip. Get a grip. I repeated this mantra in my head as I fought back my tears.

"And when your heart does... give up, you will have to be transferred from this hospital to another one in Seattle." Doctor Jenks said.

I looked up at him again. "Why?" I inquired clearly, glad I had gotten a hold on my emotions.

"Unfortunately, Forks Community Hospital is very small, and not equipped to handle situations such as yours. You can attend you check-ups here, of course, for the time being." I stared at Doctor Jenks while he spoke. Not only will I be stuck in a hospital, I will be in Seattle, where I know nobody.

Doctor Jenks seemed to read my mind. "If it's any consolation, Seattle General Hospital has the best cardiology program in the country." I closed my eyes briefly and sighed. "Alright then."

I spent the rest of the appointment with the Nurse, discussing times for my appointments. I had to come in twice a month to get my heart checked on. All this was now was a waiting game. Waiting for my heart to fail, waiting for my body to give out. Now, I was going to have to tell Charlie.

I arranged for the appointments to all fall on the weekend. I was determined to continue my job as a copy editor for my local publishing house without interruption, regardless of my heart's failure to be a heart.

After a lecture on what I could, and couldn't do (there was a lot I couldn't do), a gift of free pass to park wherever I wanted, a prescription for heart medication to be filled, a handful of pamphlets about dilated cardiomyopathy and a dozen pitying smiles, I was back in my beautiful, rusty, old Chevy truck.

I sat behind the wheel and stared at the Chevrolet logo until it blurred and morphed through my tears. I felt my breath coming in gasps, unaware of how to regain control of my breathing. The rain continued to rattle the old tin roof above me as my body convulsed in sobs. Why me? What had I done to deserve this?

I threw my fist against the old radio, repeatedly thrusting my arm until the tuning dial had broken and fallen, a crack had appeared along the edge of the narrow screen, and my knuckles had split and bled. With one last gasp, I let out a roaring scream, thankful for the rain for covering any noise I made and obscuring my windshield. Thank God, I probably look insane right now.

I paused and released the breath I had subconsciously been holding, before yanking the rear-view mirror down to examine myself, I wiped the tears from under my eyes. With a deep sigh, I resigned myself to what I had learnt. I turned the key in the ignition of my beloved truck and immediately found comfort in the startlingly loud sound it made, setting off on the highway to go tell my father I probably didn't have long to live.

A/N: Let me know what you think so far. I'm afraid this story is coming across as terribly boring. Is it even worth continuing this, six years on?

P.S: I am not a doctor, by any means, so if I am wrong about anything, I'm sorry. Blame Wikipedia :P

Thanks for reading!