***Star-crossed***

**Disclaimer- I do not own or have any affiliation with Sailor Moon, I just like to write fan fiction. =]

Usagi fumbled with the foil wrapper of her lollipop, releasing a small grunt of frustration during the impatient process. It was night-time in Tokyo, and though Usagi-chan had not yet returned home from school, she found herself at one of her favorite places: the park. Even though she was now 18 years old and in her last year of high school, she still found herself attracted to the place that had brought her so much danger and so much romance.

She ignored the guilt of making her mother worry and shoved the lollipop between pursed lips. "She probably thinks I'm at Mako-chan's, pigging out on cheesecake," Usagi assured herself over the sweet treat. She had been coming home later and going out more frequently; her mother had equated it to a high schooler's good fun. In truth, Usagi had been spending less time with Mako-chan and the other girls, and more time with herself. The usually spunky girl had ceased to find the same fun in arguing with Rei, gossiping with Minako, or eating Makato's baked goods. So earlier that evening, before Mako-chan's cheese-cake had even finished, Usagi had politely excused herself from the group, using the excuse that her mother wanted her home early in order to help with the dishes.

Usagi had felt...different...the last several months. She no longer took the same joy in little things that surrounded her; no longer did she flock over the latest local celebrity sighting. Usagi-chan had even ceased her greatest talent of all: whining. Well, not completely, of course...but for the most part, Usagi-chan had been quiet over the course of the past few months. Since it was exam time, and Usagi was such a poor student, her fellow senshi and friends assumed it was due to her test anxiety. Her mother and father merely assumed she was being a hormoinal teenager. Her brother was busy with his own school-work and video games. Chibi-Usa was still in the 30th century; Usagi would not see her until...well, the thought managed to bring a blush to her pale cheeks. As for Mamo-chan...

As she turned the corner of a familiar walkway, Usagi found herself by the bench she and Mamoru-san so often sat upon. "Mamo-chan," she murmurred wistfully, trailing her free hand along the wood paneling. In a familiar and customary fashion, she sat herself upon the left-side—her side—of the bench. After a moment of silence, however, she fidgeted towards the middle, and overlooked the same view she and Mamo-chan had shared countless times. Usagi-chan closed her eyes for a moment, envisioning the scene—Mamoru, tall and handstome and studious, seated in his forest-green blazer, a book in his hand, those stormy eyes of his intent upon the text at hand. Her aside him, babbling away, content to just cuddle at his side and observe the view, daydreaming about the future...

Mamo-chan was gone. He was the last person who would know of her peculiar temperment. Then again, Mamo-chan was a big part of the reason that Usagi felt so differently, anyway.

After the threat of Galaxia was eradicated from the galaxy, Mamoru once again took up residency in his studio apartment. He enrolled in a local university. Things had returned to normal for over a year; Usagi had been unsettled, but generally happy. However, after that year of normalcy, Mamoru was once again offered the oppurtunity to study abroad in the United States. Such an offer was seldom made once, let alone twice, and after the failure of his first attempt, how could Usagi tell him to stay?

The morning of his leave replayed in her mind often...

"Flight 143 to New York, United States...now boarding in Gate 5-"

Usagi fumbled with her hands, unsure of what to do or say. She peeked up at Mamo-chan from behind her veil of golden bangs, tears glistening in ceruluean hues.

"Usako, don't cry." Mamoru offered those words and grabbed her hands. "Give me a smile before I go to America..."

The whole situation made Usagi feel entirely strange. She had been in this situation before; Mamoru had left her, had gone, and then...

"Don't worry, Usako. Everything is going to be fine. Nothing like that is ever going to happen again. You needn't worry about me..."

How could she tell him? How could she tell him that it was not the threat of physical harm that she was worried about? How could she tell him that it was the fact that she did NOT feel that overwhelming sense of fear and worry that had her so startled? Her love, a love that was so old and intricate even she could barely fathom, was leaving her—she should be hysterical, barely containable. Though she loved Mamoru and knew she would miss him, Usagi did not have that hysteria.

"Maybe because I'm used to being alone now," she murmurred between licks. When she sat down and really thought about her relationship with Mamoru, they had spent more time apart than they had together. Granted, most of it was all due to evil scum.

In any case, Mamoru was the last person to catch on to Usagi's worries. Since his departure, they spoke only weekly through the telephone. She wrote him letters, but he was too busy with his studies, writing papers and taking exams, to have time for a reply. Usagi understood—too much.

"Why do I feel so weird lately?" Usagi questioned herself aloud. It was a combination of reasons, really. She missed the constant companionship of Chibi-Usa, for one—her house felt too empty. Mamoru was gone...and she was lonely. It had been so long since she had been held by him, Usagi had almost forgotten the smell of his aftershave. The girls had been busy with the after-school clubs they had joined in their first year; Mako-chan was now the president of the Cooking Club. Minako was busy with the school's production of a popular American play, in which she had been cast as the lead. Ami, as usual, was concerned with her studies, and since it was exam season, she was even more stuioud than usual. Since Rei's grandfather was getting older, she was learning how to run the temple, and it took up much of her free time. They did not fret over Usagi—their princess was far from danger, afterall. Usagi was not involved in clubs; she was not a good student. And without her boyfriend around to assure her, Usagi felt... useless. She felt like a drifter. And since Sailor Moon hadn't been needed since Galaxia, her feeling of uselessness was only cemented more firmly.

Now that she wasn't amidst a slew of battles and controversies to win her love back, Usagi had time to think...about everything. What was fate? She knew it existed, obviously. She had been told of her destiny since she was 14 years old, afterall...but how was it formed, could it be wavered from, and what were the repercussions of such?

Growing up had matured Usagi, and she found herself really thinking about the reality of being who she was—Princess Serenity of the Moon Kingdom, now Tsukino, Usagi of Tokyo, and in the future, Neo-Queen Serenity of Crystal Tokyo. It was like a long car-trip, and she was stuck right in the middle of it. Bored, wanting to ask, "Are we there yet?" The Princess and the Queen, they were both important-but who was she as Tsukino, Usagi? A high-schooler of Tokyo, Japan, and about to graduate? Mamoru wouldn't return for at least three more years. With her boyfriend away and her future set out before her, what was she to do in the meantime? Usagi was left to bide her time until the future came towards her...and it left her feeling more than useless: it left her feeling bored.

It had gotten darker out. Usagi had finished her lollipop. She tossed it into the waste-basket aside the bench, and looked up at the sky. The stars were out now; they were rather vivid in the night-sky, despite the bright lights of the city. Ami was not there to drone on with constellation titles, and so Usagi-chan was free to stare at them blindly. She did not wonder which one was which; the stars only made her think of one thing.

"Later, Odango." the words rang out clearly in her mind, and she thought about the last moment she had seen her star before he had vanished off into the night-sky. Was he alive? Was he back on his planet? Was he looking at the same sky from a different planet? Did he ever think of her...?

Annoyed with the new surge of thoughts that clouded her mind, Usagi stood abruptly. "Time to go home, star-gazing is over-rated," she mumbled, turning to the pathway she had came from.

No use thinking of things I can't know of—and shouldn't know of, she lectured herself as she began the long walk through the park towards her house. Why was she thinking of him, anyway? She should be thinking of her dear Mamo-chan, hard at work in the United States, so he could be the best King he could be...

But it was not Mamo-chan who had seen her at her weakest moment; had been there to protect her when she was left with nothing, and nobody. Seiya had seen her when she was feeble, scared, and completely hopeless—and he had still loved her and protected her all the while, uncaring of his own life. Mamoru would have done the same, she told herself. Still, the point remained...it had not been he who shared the most frightening moment of her life. It had been Seiya who was there to embrace her. She could still smell his aftershave...

Usagi gave one last glance to the stars. At that instant, a glint of light crossed the sky. A shooting star? She smiled wistfully to herself. "I wish that he could see me right now, and know that I was thinking of him." With that guilty thought in mind, Usagi-chan proceeded to walk home.