Disclaimer: Unfortunately I don't own Kyou Kara Maou…yet

Title: Hate me (Song fic)

Author: Me (darksmistress)

Series: Kyou Kara Maou
Pairing: Yuuram

Genre: Angst

Notes: This happens at the end of the series when Yuuri leaves Shin Makoku (for what he thinks) forever. This is how I make him feel about it.

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Yuuri found himself once again in his room, on his bed, brooding over leaving Shin Makoku. All he could think about lately was those he left behind. One, in particular, was in his thoughts more often. The guilt in leaving him, was the worst of all.

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I'm alone

He replayed all the memories he had left of him. He didn't want to forget. He was scared to forget. Only when reliving those memories did he realize what an idiot he was, what a wimp he was, for not noticing him.

Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain

His family was worried about him. He still ate, but not very much. He'd sleep but without rest, he would wake with wet eyes and the haunted vision of green orbs staring sadly at him. He would talk, but only when asked something directly, he'd only give a short response. Even baseball meant nothing to him anymore.

He felt dead without that annoying, loving, insulting, beautiful, loyal, berating, trusting blonde with him.

It had taken him three days to figure out that he loved him.

He'd tell himself continuously that 'It was for the best', 'You don't deserve him', 'He doesn't need me'.

An ounce of peace is all I want for you.

He remembered all the times he had told Yuuri how much he loved him. How sincere it was.

And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?

Yuuri always pushed him away, not accepting of his love, his care.


It is I that wanted space

So Yuuri would try his best to send out a telepathic message to him. Not asking for forgiveness, he didn't deserve it. But telling the blonde that he should forget about him. He wanted him to move on, no matter how much it broke his heart thinking about him being with someone else.

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

So I'll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind


Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

He remembered leaving him.


And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave

Yuuri closed his eyes and remembered his walk home from the fountain, when he had transported back for the last time. Reflecting on what he had just done.


Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made

And like a baby boy I never was a man

He remembered how he imagined his face to be when he had turned away.


Until I saw your green eyes crying and I held your face in my hand

When he realized his feelings, he couldn't help but feel angry at himself, he wanted to forget so much. Just to get rid of the guilt and pain that flooded his heart.


And then I fell down yelling "make it go away!"
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be

Yuuri knew the unspoken words that he had never said. He cared too much for Yuuri that he would never push him or make him feel guilty for not returning his love.


And then he whispered "How can you do this to me?"

Yuuri let hot tears flow from his eyes, and sent his message out once more.


Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

This is how Yuuri would leave things. He would never forget him. He would punish himself from now on with the guilt. He wouldn't allow himself to forget.

Although he would never be able to say it to him directly, he'd still say it time and time again.

"I'm sorry, Wolfram"

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This is my first song fic, so I hope it wasn't too bad. I woke up this morning and turned my radio on and this song was playing. I liked this song before, and as I listened to the lyrics, I thought of Yuuri and Wolfram. So, yeah………

Plz R&R!