TITLE: White Wedding: The April Chronicle

AUTHOR: Neolithicdream

PAIRING: Callie & Arizona's wedding but its April all the way.

RATING: PG 13

SUMMARY: A very short piece of silly fluff or drabble about how April enjoyed the Wedding. I wrote it as part of Chapter 7 of "Its a nice day for a White Wedding" but I decided to post it separately so you can read it as part of the longer fic or can be read entirely as a stand alone piece.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Calzona or any of the characters mentioned in this fic. They are the property of Shonda Rhimes/ ABC etc... This fic is purely written for enjoyment and without intent or prospect of profit. No copyright infringement intended.

April Kepner really enjoyed the day. She had worried that turning up without a date would have made her sad. However in fact she would not have had time to entertain a date so busy she was taking pictures here and catching a few moments on Camcorder there. Still true artists are seldom appreciated in their own time and so before her work was appreciated she had endured some scorn...and a few jokingly made threats...they were joking, right?

"I swear, Arizona, if Kepner points her camera in our direction once more I will have to postpone the honeymoon."

"Uh, ok...why baby?"

"To fix the many bones in her I will have broken"

"So you like photography, huh?"

"Oh hey Alex you're here yay! Yeah back home I had my own darkroom and I got all my photography badges as a Brownie and..."

"Whatever, Dude! How do you intend to develop these ones?"

April thought she detected a hint of menace in his tone but with Alex it was hard to tell

"Oh, uhm well it's a digi..."

"I'm only asking because if you take one more picture of me you'll be developing it anally!"

"Kepner, if you come within 100 yards of me with that thing once more you will be doing rectal exams till the end of your residency!"

"Yes Dr. Bailey"...boy was April glad her state of the art camera came with a particularly good long distance zoom lens.

"April" Cristina said in her sweetest tone – the one that caused anyone who knew Yang to fear...a sweet Cristina Yang was an ungodly thing to be sure "Do you want to die a virgin?"

April Kepner looked at her colleague wide eyed and in some horror "Uhm NO?"

"Then can I strongly advise that either you find someone to bang in the next two minutes or stop taking photographs of me and Owen!"

In the end Kepner proved to be a godsend given that somewhat bizarrely both the official photographer and videographer let them down.

The Photographer had been recommended by Yang. He apparently took no less than 100 photographs before realising that there was no film in his camera – Cristina later admitted that she recommended him as he had given her his card during her ill-fated career as a bargirl in Joes. He had also complimented her on her outfit that night so she felt he had a good eye. He may however have had one too many "early Onset Alzheimer's".

The Videographer had been recommended by Teddy. She had met him on Facebook. She later admitted her recommendation had been out of guilt as she had turned down his pleas for a second date. He had successfully recorded the wedding. Unfortunately before he could hand over the wedding video it had been seized by the Feds (along with many other tapes) in a major country wide crackdown... on illegal porn.

Nonetheless Teddy said he still didn't make it into her top10 date disasters of 2011.

Mark Sloan, in a valiant attempt to remain respectful (as promised to Callie during their talk on boundary setting) has refrained from comment...he thinks the the stress and strain of this silence may be giving him an ulcer.

In fact Kepner turned out to be a very excellent unofficial wedding chronicler/ photographer/ videographer – popping up as she did, unexpectedly for the most part, at all the significant moments of the day, capturing for posterity all the usual wedding moments and some less so including Bailey and Eli's secret tryst behind a rather mighty oak tree and a rather wistful Mark Sloan staring at an oblivious Avery and Lexie as they danced almost obscenely closely and even capturing the mystery of the missing chunk of wedding cake(stolen before the Cake was officially cut by the happy couple). Yes "Fudge - gate" was resolved weeks later once they finally got round to watching the last of Aprils opus...what she called to their initial befuddlement "Calzona – the Directors Cut".

There he was, unmistakeable in his Chiefliness - Dr. Richard Webber, Chief of Surgery and eminent surgeon – expertly cutting, as befitting a scalpel wielder, a large wedge of cake before almost seamlessly pushing the remaining cake together before scuttling off into the darkness.

Still one can have too much of a good thing.

Later on that night after Callie and Arizona finally bade their farewells and made it to the honeymoon suite some psychological scarring became apparent. As Arizona pushed her new wife roughly up against the wall and enveloped her in a hard passionate kiss she was met with equal force and passion in return until suddenly Callie broke away gasping "Stop, stop, Babe..we can't..I can't."

Arizona seeing the fearful look in her brides eye "Callie...oh God what's wrong?"

"Kepner...she's not here right...she's not going to pop up and shout 'CHEESE' is she?" there was a tremor in her voice as Callie wondered if there was a quick cure for sudden onset Apriliphobia

"No, Babe...she's not here...we're safe" and Arizona resumed where she had left off.

Moments later and this time it was Arizona who broke the kiss "You know better safe than sorry, I'll check in the closet you go look under the bed!"