Hello everyone :)

This is my first fiction so don't be to hard on me.

Okay, so this is basically the story of a drug addict girl that decides to stop drugs and start her life again. She lives in London and moves to Newcastle to her new care home Elm Tree House.

I have taken personally hard drugs not so long ago, and I smoke, so every feeling Nadiya has is true… I felt them myself. I haven't taken heroin though, but one of my friend has. Today I am clean and I decided to write a story on the series Tracy Beaker Returns with every character, because I like it, even if I am a bit old (sixteen, its my little sister that incited me to Tracy Beaker haha).

I like Liam, he is good looking, so this will be a Liam/Nadiya story.

Oh, and I am french, I was born in Paris, but my mother is english so we watch british TV. So forgive my spelling problems.

This story is rated M for :

-They are difficult, shocking scenes, that deals with drugs and sometimes abuse.

-they will be a, or a few sex scenes between Liam and Nadiya, you choose.

- Language.

So if you are too young, or easily shocked, don't read. But this story is very interesting for those who like difficult lives, and details.

There :) review please to tell me what you think. I will update very soon !

Nadiya woke up with a terrible headache this morning.

She opened her eyes and stared at the white ceiling above her ; she blinked a few times before realizing she wasn't in her room. The young girl couldn't recognize anything she was surrounded by. The ceiling was plane and smooth, whereas hers was cracked and dirty. The bed she as lying in was soft and her head rested on a pillow. In the hotel room she actually stayed in, nothing was either soft or clean. The thing was, she couldn't remember why she wasn't in it.

.The Girl Who Dreamed Of Flour And A Tube, By TaylorGangGirl, Chapter one: Leaving London.

The headache was painful. Nadiya though of last night.

Friday the 13 was a special day; It was the day she was born. Then again, was it really worth celebrating ?

Nadiya was an orphan. She was abandoned two days after stepping into the world ; left by her mother in a dust bin, near a Pizza shop. It was the man who owned the shop, Gino della Carte, who found her crying her lungs out. Around the tiny baby's neck was a note : "Keep her safe, forgive me".

"Keep her safe" thought the young girl "I never felt secure"…

Suddenly, her past life came back to her, and the pain was unbearable. It felt like a knife stabbing her to the chest. She closed her eyes and decided not to think about it.

The room was actually a living room, and the bed she was lying in was a sofa. As she sat up, holding her head in her hands, she then stared at the empty wine and vodka bottles, the burned out joints and the cigarette butts. On the floor was piled up beer cans, spilled food, and clothes. The Girl looked at herself. She was still wearing the red dress she had stolen from New Look, and the high black heels that killed her feet when she got up to the kitchen.

The problem was, she didn't have enough money to spend. Stealing clothes allowed her to dress well, so that people wouldn't judge on her look. She wore fashionable, original, and sometimes sexy clothes. Stealing was also part of a game, in which she played with her life.

Nadiya was french. She had been adopted by a nice family, and lived in Paris till she was twelve. Then, after terrible events, she moved to London, moved from care home to care home, got fostered a few times, but nobody could stand her.

She was wild, distant, and terribly unpredictable. She let no one control her. The girl had friends all over town ; her own trashy, junky friends she thought understood her. Sometimes though, the girl would wonder off in the city at night, loving the sound of people talking, of cars, and all other sorts of noises. All the pressure the world gave her, would disappear in these moments of solitude. Every sound was music, she felt so pure, and nobody knew her.

It was the family "stay together for ever" thing she disliked most of all. The girl was a unfortunately drug addict ; she would go out all night with her friends in London, passing the evening in clubs. Nadiya took cocaine most of the time with other substances like ecstasy, amphetamine (powerful drug used to knock a horse out), and Weed. Sometimes heroine.

Today, Nadiya had woken up in a house she didn't recognize, and with people she didn't know. She was drinking milk while staring at the sleeping bodies of men and women, all pilled up on the sofa or on the floor. The place smelled of smoke and cold vomit.

"talking about smoke" she though… the girl lit a cigarette and inhaled the burning substance. She smoked while thinking "Newcastle people are awesome".

A month ago, she had escaped from her last foster family and lived on the streets for about three days. She lived with a friend in a cellar, taking drugs all day, and when they had no money, they would go out on the street. The most terrible thing with the girl was the fact she sometimes sold her body to earn money. Living in such conditions was terrible, but the need for drug even greater. It was a sunday morning when the police finally caught her, nearly dead, heroin flowing in her delicate veins. The girl had been dragged to her social worker.

- There is, he told her with a desperate voice, a real problem that needs to be solved. You nearly died back there, you've run away and been rejected from you're foster family for the 10th time. Good lord ! Nadiya I was so worried ? He thought a moment. They couldn't send her to rehab. She had already gone there not so long ago, and it had been a terrible experience for the girl, and a mistake… I have taken a decision Nadiya, we need to talk…

The girl looked at him and said "I need a smoke".

Her social worker was a kind and wise man. He had met Nadiya after her second run away, and a special bond had been created directly between them. He had never let her down. Other social workers would have just quit her case due to the lack of sleep and peace she gave them. She was a difficult person to maintain, and would spend most of her time alone under a bridge or with friends in a club. She was terribly unpredictable. But even if she was a difficult child, he had grown patient with her, and gave her the freedom of her choices. To his colleagues, who where against such freedom, he would say "Would you like to see a beautiful wild bird in small cage ? unable to fly and terrified ? No. Thats why I leave her alone. And anyway, she always comes back." His name was Louis Boulanger. He had discovered her drug problem truly after her overdose.

But for the first time, he felt tired and discouraged by her. He had searched every care homes, phoned every family he judge keen to accept her fragile and unique personality. None had worked. No one wanted a drug addict as a kid, and the parents would always discover her terrible secret too late. As he doubted on his own skills as a social worker, he gave her the cigarette she craved for.

- You smoke to much, he said cooly.

She ignored the comment and smoked, filling the air with grey particles.

-You what to know what I want ? She said smiling. She had beautiful white teeth once, now they were yellowed by the fags…, I don't want to go back to a care home. It will always be the same. Its not the people I don't like. Its when I'm alone in a room, it makes me remember of…, She stopped talking, and with shaking hands she lit an other cigarette,… I cant stand it. The silence. Thats why I run away. Nobody comes to me, nobody helps me when I need them. They leave me alone in the silence, and when they ask what's wrong, it's to late, I cant stand the place. It only brings me back to when…

She looked at him with watery eyes and said : "Louis, I cant go back. And I cant go to rehab. I feel safe surrounded by noise, or with friends, but with a clear and loud sound".

- I know Nadiya. It's very difficult for you, but you have no choice. You have to live and be in care of some one until you're at least 16.

The girl remained silent. She was stuck. Reaching sixteen in more than a year, she still had to wait before being totally free of her choices. Her old care homes had been hell for her. The other kids where not mean though, she only felt like no one understood her, and then she was afraid. And then She would take cocaine.

Louis Boulanger and her had a secret spot, where they would talk things over. It was a bench near a peaceful lake, under a willow tree. The leaves had an autumn red gold color in this time of year. The sum warmed up Nadiya's delicate face, as a cool breeze waved her long blond hair. She had the most beautiful hair, witch reached the end of her back. Sometimes, when she was alone, this place was the only spot were she felt secure. The girl could contemplate the view for hours, and listen to the birds. On this very same bench, she had cried her heart out, and laughed with Louis. He was her friend, and she loved him. He was the only person she could trust, and seeing him disappointed in her made her heart bleed. But now, She had to face the fact that he couldn't prevent her from care homes.

-What if, he started, after a long silence between them, I find you a care home some were else ? Far away from here. Where you would move on more easily and feel good…, He thought a minute…, You could start all over again. Forget about drugs. Since rehab wont do anything, an I doubted a specialist care home will fit you... I could find you a nice place with good and caring people. They would make you feel welcome… and human. If I do find a good care home, promise me you won't run away, or take hard drugs.

He didn't know about the prostitution. And it would stay like this.

- I can't make any promises, she said sadly, throwing the end of her cigarette in the lake.

- But… If I find you a good place ? A place where people are different. They would take care of you.

Nadiya laughed and said "I can give it a try. Its true that… When I took it and that… everything went black… I was so scared. It's so painful Louis, I feel so tired and sick of living. I haven't taken heroin or coke in days. I need it and its killing me…. Its true… I what to change. When I did my overdose it opened my eyes, and I know I must stop. I have taken drugs since I was thirteen… I want to forget my past, all the lies, the deaths, the pain, the… You get it. But I don't know were you will find such a place. I've tried every care homes in London."

-You never listen carefully. London is finished for you. It brings you back to many memories, and your friends haven't stopped you with the drug problem. I'll send you far away from here.

-What ! You are moving me away from London ? What about my friends ?

-Nadiya, don't make me remind you that it is you're "friends" that have supported your drug addiction. They haven't help you, they made it even worse. You can see them when you are fully cured and well. But right now you are fragile, and I know you wont stand a chance to dentition.

-If they had known about my past, they would have stopped drugs.

-But they didn't. You didn't tell them. How could they know you delta with drugs before ? You should have been more careful… Any way. I have a friend, an old friend. He owns a care home in England. It's a very nice place I heard. I'm sure my friend will be charmed if you came intone his care. He has dealt with very difficult and broken children. They live a very happy life now. Its in Newcastles.

Newcastle ? Nadiya couldn't believe her ears… "its so far, she thought". Nadiya loved London, but Louis was right. If she had any chance of having a decent life, she had to move on. It was hard. What Louis told her, surprised her and she started crying.

- I know its hard to move on, he said patting her shoulder

-I'm not crying because i'm leaving, I'm crying because I need it, and my arm is burning.

Louis looked at her left arm, and saw little red holes, were the girl used to inject heroin with a needle. Under the skin of her arm, and the little holes, was a big, black vein, dead, rotten (when you take heroin, you inject yourself with a needle in the same vein, until it dies because of the drug. It basically rots under the skin).

-My poor girl, he said with tears in his yes. It wasn't her fault, after all, the first time she took heroin, it was against her will.

-I will miss London, she said between sobs, then her mind went blank ; she felt so tired and depressed. Without her dose of drug, she would be in such a pain that it nearly drove her mad.

It was far from the town she had lived in for fifteen years in, the new care home. Far from the city that only shone in her nightmares.

-Well , her care worker asked, Do you agree ?

She reached slowly for the cigarette case in his pocket before saying : Yeah.

"Newcastle people are awesome"

Nadiya started to remember last night, although she had black holes in her memory. Her and Louis had reached the city yesterday morning, and had settled in a cheap hotel, since it was two in the morning. It had been her birthday, she was now fifteen.

Louis slept the rest of the night alone; she went to a local pub just as soon as they arrived.

Nadiya, even if she was a solitary person, loved going to public places such as cafe's, high streets and clubs. Nobody knew her, and she felt pure when going there. She faked her identity, changed her personality, and the game would begin. But this was not the only reason.

The girl was gifted with the incredibility to dance like no other. So she liked showing off her skills in front of a crowed ; the girl felt powerful and above all.

Since she was a child, Nadiya danced like a professional without taking any lessons, by moving her body so that every one was amazed with this incredible talent. There was no shame for her to move her hips or jump in the air while screaming. It made her feel alive.

At two years old, she was adopted, and her new parents noticed the first day she stepped into the house, that she was gifted. The girl started to take ballet lessons. It was a great discovery for the her to work with people that were like herself, although she was way better than the other girls in her group. Ballet became an obsession ; she dance it every were she went : at school, at home, even when she washed or walked in the street. What pride and glory she felt when she demonstrated her brand new moves. But ballet wasn't the only style of dance she learned. The girl learned street dance, pop, and even the legendary Tango. Nadiya became the pride an joy of her parents, and when she reached high school, the girl went to a special place for dancers. It gave her a purpose in life, she new what she wanted to become. Until she was thirteen ; it was a monday when every thing changed.

It ended what she had achieved for years, and broken her hopes for a good future. But, although she didn't go to ballet lessons any more, she still danced every thing she knew.

The pub was full of sorts of people. In a corner was the old generation sipping beer and talking about memories and wives, in the other were drunk young adults, singing vulgar songs. The atmosphere was most delightful and welcoming. The air smelled of alcohol. The girl liked it, and went forward to the younger group who stared at her with desire and amazement. She asked for three shots of vodka, and, as a blond boy talked to her she started the game. The barman didn't even ask her age ; with her red short dress, black leather jacket, black spiky heels, and heavy make up, she looked much older than her actual age. She knew she looked like a slut, but nobody ever hesitated giving her what she wanted. It made her feel powerful, and she craved for these moments were she was a complete other person. Attention made her forget her past and herself.

Somehow, she couldn't remember anything else from the night. Nadiya supposed she was drunk to her limit. She had flash backs of pictures in her head, of a group of young men and woman taking her with them. That was how she arrived to the house. She remembered other pictures of a wild party between her and the others, then it was all black.

She found on the floor finished joints, and a old weed head. So she had drunk and smoked, and… maybe even… done something with one of the boys. The girl had already had a one night stand, and it didn't scare her. She had sold her body more than twice. Still, she checked her self, but found nothing.

Nadiya had to go back to Louis. He knew she had been out. He was used to it, even if it was forbidden for her to leave his sight for too long. But she always came back, so he didn't worry too much. But this time, she was fragile, and he was terribly worried.

The girl looked at the kitchen clock. It was covered in tomato sauce or ketchup, or something red that made it difficult to read the time. It said 9.30. She had to go now. She didn't know where she was. Worst of all, her feet were suffering from being in heels for the past 10 hours. She took them of, and before leaving the place, checked the bodies around her.

It was 10.17 when Nadiya finally got to her social worker. She was bare foot and tired from running. The unknown place wasn't far, thank God! from where Louis was waiting. She just didn't know which way to go.

-Where were you young lady ? What did you do huh ? Please tell me you didn't

-No, I didn't take any. I was out. Don't think that I would have stayed in this horrible hotel during my birthday. And sorry if I worried you,... I didn't know were I was going. I got lost.

-Where did you go ? I suppose you had a great time since you didn't come back to the hotel. And sorry its horrible, but I couldn't find any other at two in the bloody morning. Any way of we go.

Nadiya told him about the strange and wild night she had had, then smiled. When she checked the bodies, she had found at least fifty pounds, some weed, and three full packets of cigarettes.

-Be careful, said Louis, you were lucky last night. But if you had a good time… and it was your birthday after all. Anyway we have to talk, let's go to a cafe, I'll explain.

It was a lovely cafe. Nadiya smoked her stolen cigarettes while listening to Louis. He told her that every thing was in place. He had called his friend, and he had accepted to keep Nadiya to his care. Also, when they'll arrive at the care home, she would not go to school right away. The girl will have to learn through a correspondence course.

The care home was called Elm tree house. Nadiya thought it was a nice name. Then, her care worker told her that for the sake of all the efforts he had put in this case, it was forbidden for her to run away. She had a month to try out the home, and if she disliked it, then they would go back to London. She agreed. There was another problem. Stealing, he told her, was not allowed. It meant she could not steal from the others, naturally she wouldn't. After all, they were care kids just like her, with a difficult past. But then she thought about the shops. He hadn't said a word about them, so she wouldn't change that habit, and even if he had mentioned them, she wouldn't have listened to him. Then they talked about the partying, the smoking and drug problem. Since she was in a great pain at the moment, she could smoke in her room, but when no one was there, and with the window open. When the others were at school, she could smoke as much as she wanted, but in their presence she had to be careful. She had to show a good example. As for drugs, her new care workers would do anything to help her. They knew she had moved out of London to forget drugs and get on with her life.

She had weed right now on her, Louis knew and told her that it would be the last of it she ever smoked. And that anyway she couldn't find someone to deal with her since she was a stranger in this city. The girl grinned because she knew that dealers were easy to find if you looked in the right places. Although she refused to let the Marijuana go, she promised herself to never smoke in front of any other resident of the home.

As for the partying, Louis told her that she could go out at night on saturday and come back a eleven a clock maximum. But not alone. She had to be with an adult, other grown up, or respectable kid. The girl thought it was a joke.

What drove her mad in the end was Louis telling her that living in another city was the perfect opportunity to stop smoking. "Piss off" She said.

They both stayed silent.

Louis paid for the coffees and went to his car. He opened the door and called out : Are you coming ?

Nadiya was day dreaming. Her mind went balk as she stared at her cigarette butt. She slowly looked at her care worker when he called her name, and with an extreme lassitude, went in the car.

-You took all my things right ?

-Yeah…. said Louis, in a 'your question is very stupid' tone . As he started the car the girl cried out: Louis I have to change clothes !

-Why couldn't you do it the café ?

She ignored him and searched in her clothes bag something more "decent" to wear. After five minutes of wondering, she finally opted for a blue skinny jean, a white t-shirt with her favorite singer on it : Wiz Khalifa, black 6inch heels, and a dark blue jean jacket with black wool inside, and a large woolly dark grey scarf. She then put on heavy make up with false eye lashes. Dark red lipstick, and the girl was finished.

-You know, its only kids over there.

She still didn't answer and lit a cigarette before turning the post on, and she began to day dream.

So, what did you think ? Review people, but don't be to hard ! The better reviews, the quickest i'll update :) Much Love From Paris xxx