The Steps

Joh: This isn't that great but because I haven't done anything for awhile I decided to post this. This was originally written for the kink meme and I moved it here.

Warnings: Yaoi, angst, dark, smooching, mild violence (I guess), spoilers

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I.

Joshua wasn't usually interested in the people of Shibuya. To him, there weren't individuals, just crowds and faces and Melodies that blurred into the greater Music that made up Shibuya.

So, of course, Joshua was a little concerned when he found himself spending more and more time watching a certain young boy. It was his unnaturally bright Soul that had first attracted Joshua's attention and caused him to check into the boy's life to see what kind of person could posses such a Soul.

Joshua was sure that he would never forget what he saw.

Neku, nine at the time, had been sitting on the curb of the road outside his apartment, elbows resting on his knees as he watched cars and people hurry past. His wide blue eyes reflected the passing crowds, mouth set into a thin line as he sat completely silent and unmoving. He stayed like that until the sky slowly turned red, casting an orange glow across his skin, before night fell and the city lights were all that illuminated his small form.

It was the familiar, lonely stoop in the boy's back that had Joshua returning the next day to watch him again.

II.

Blood.

It was trickling across the cement and creeping its way through the thin cracks into the ground. Joshua watched it soak into the dark material of the boy's shirt, staining it a dark brown color. He took a step closer to his proxy and peered into the dull, blue eyes before allowing a small smile to grace his lips.

There were many reasons why he picked Neku Sakuraba to be his proxy for this Game. The most obvious was that Neku had the brightest Soul Joshua had seen in a long, long time. Of course, it was still rough around the edges, but he was sure that after playing his Game it would become more refined.

He knelt down beside Neku's body and reached a pale hand out to ghost over the boy's face, drained of color. Carefully, he shut Neku's staring eyes so that his eyelashes lay curled against his cheek. It looked almost like he was sleeping.

Another reason could be that Neku happened to remind Joshua strongly of himself. His cold detachment of the people around him, his bitter resentment of anyone who tried to get close to him and the way he pushed everyone away. It was all achingly familiar. It only made sense for Joshua to pick the boy who was the most like him to represent him in the Game.

Those were all good reasons as to why Joshua chose Neku. But, no, that wasn't the true reason why. It was something much darker, something far more satisfying.

After years of watching Neku from the UG, unable to do anything but observe, he was finally given the chance to bring Neku into his grasp, finally able to step into the boy's life.

Joshua dropped the Player's pin on Neku's chest and stood up, his shadow falling over Neku's fallen form. He enjoyed the idea of having Neku as a pawn, as a toy. His toy.

III.

Neku didn't like him very much.

The way Neku didn't even bother to try and hide the resentment in his voice when he talked to Joshua never failed to make him smile. It was cute, endearing, and it pleased Joshua to know that he had such an impact on him.

He was sure that if they weren't partners Neku would have given in to his urge to strangle him. Joshua smirked. Now wouldn't that have been interesting?

"Why are you smiling like that?" Neku demanded, eyes narrowing suspiciously as he glanced over his shoulder at Joshua.

"No reason." Joshua shrugged easily, loving the scowl curling at Neku's lips. "I just like watching you." He added on, smile growing when Neku's cheeks flushed angrily.

When Neku turned away from him and stormed down the street, determined to complete the day's mission, Joshua focused in on Neku's Music and listened to the way it spiked sharply in his anger.

He chuckled to himself, chest swelling with some unnamed emotion. He liked how despite the fact that many things seemed to piss Neku off, he was the only one who could affect Neku's Music so drastically.

IV.

Kissing Neku was like kissing syrup.

Each whispered moan that rolled from Neku's lips to Joshua's was sweet and addictive, smooth and perfect.

Joshua tangled his fingers in Neku's hair, stiff with gel, and pressed his lips to the redhead's neck where a pulse should have been beating. He smiled to himself and pressed Neku harder against the wall, whispering his name feverishly against his skin.

"Wait… the mission…"

"Hasn't come yet." Joshua soothed him, kissing away his protests. He had waited years for this and wasn't letting it go, missions be damned. He nuzzled Neku's neck, inhaling deeply and committing Neku's unique scent to memory. How often had he imagined this scene in his head when Neku had been in the RG, out of his reach?

Neku fell silent after that and allowed his blue eyes to slowly slip shut, the mistrust gradually fading from his expression. He kissed Joshua back shyly and after some coaxing let his hands rest lightly at Joshua's hips. At some point Neku's headphones slipped free and fell to the pavement below them with clatter that went unheard by both boys.

Joshua smirked and traced his fingers down Neku's body, memorizing each line and dip that made up Neku's thin frame. This belongs to me, Joshua thought to himself as he trailed his lips along the line of Neku's jaw.

This boy was his and would always be his. "Forever," Joshua said out loud, making Neku blink curiously in response.

He shook his head at his proxy's stare and leaned in to steal another kiss.

V.

Tears.

Neku was crying.

It was fascinating, in a sense. Joshua had watched Neku grow up and even then Neku's tears were a rare sight.

He toyed idly with the gun in his hand, thumb running along the cold metal. "Tears, Neku, for me? How touching." Although his tone sounded mocking he meant what he said. It was touching that Neku, his Neku, cared enough about him to be hurt by him.

He lifted his arm and pointed the gun at Neku, eyes narrowing to slits. Neku lifted his head, eyes brimming with anger, hurt, and betrayal. Joshua couldn't help but feel smug at that. Only he could summon forth such a complex mix of emotions in Neku.

"Why?" Neku's voice rang off the shadowy walls of the Room of Reckoning, echoing slightly.

Joshua ignored his question and brushed his hair back as he dragged his eyes up and down Neku's form. He had claimed Neku's body and had the marks to prove it. He had claimed Neku's heart and had the boy's tears to prove it. Time to claim his Soul.

With a smile, he pulled the trigger.

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Joh: Yeah, not really romantic.

Jessie: Oh, Josh, you ass.

Joh: Indeed. But that's why we love him.