Okay. Well I'm delving into RENT fan fiction because I completely adore RENT and I guess I like to write.
First I want to make it clear that I like to read fanfic. I don't especially like to write it because mostly I feel socially inept when I do so. But more than anything, I really really like to poke fun at things.

It should be known that I love RENT and all its characters. I don't have a problem with off-canon fics. I don't have a problem with Mark/Roger shipping mostly cause that shit writes itself. I don't have a problem with any sort of pairing, nor do I prefer anything over the others. I just think that it's funny how much play Mark gets around here... despite getting virtually none in the source material.

Perhaps it's because we all identify with Mark, the everyman, the one who's more than a bit neurotic,usually alone and would probablywrite himself into a hot and heavy Mark/Maureen anyway. When it comes down to it, this is my parody of all the Mark shipping that goes on around here. If you get offended, pretend I'm sorry and didn't mean to hurt your feelings.

I did not create these characters, save for a wordlessly incredible OC that will surface in Chapter Three or so.

Profanity and sexual references will come up, hence the T rating.

That was an idiotically long intro. I'll post more of this when I feel like it which will probably be soon thanks to boredom and spring break.

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"I just can't take it anymore, Roger," Mark's voice faltered, watching as his friend turned, a few paces in from of him, his sweatered torso heaving, doing little to keep out the driving rain.

Compassion washed across Roger's ruggedly masculine face as he lessened the distance between them with a few shaky steps. "What's wrong?"

Mark struggled to swallow the enormous lump in his throat and approached his roommate tenatively, the rain almost completely obstructing the crisp vision his glasses usually provided. His ice blue eyes gazed purposefully into Roger's deep green ones as he struggled to find the right words. "Roger, I love you."

This came as a complete and total surprise to Roger, who had been lusting after the scrawny blonde Jew for a while now. Roger took a brief moment to evaluate his thoughts in a way that would be expressed in a meaningful soliloquy or a song full of raw, heartfelt emotions were this a musical and not just a petty fan fiction. At twenty-seven, he was an unusually good-looking young man with a smokin' hot S&M dancer girlfriend whose small number of faults were included but not limited to the AIDS virus ravaging her body and a nasty smack addiction. The songs flowed freely from his pen, now, and his unmistakably trained voice always seemed to hit the right notes. He would have his entire life ahead of him were it not for HIV stopwatch, ticking away the hours, minutes, and seconds of his life. And yet there was always that passionate spark that ignited his heart every time his roommate crossed his line of vision... which, considering that they lived together, was pretty often.

He had confided this in Collins once, but the ever-intellectual philsopher dismissed it as acid reflux. And yet, the fire in his heart smoldered on.

And now here Mark stood, heart in his hands. Roger could almost see the ventricles contracting in anticipation as he mulled over his options. Should he abandon Mimi, whom he was actually pretty fond of? Should he risk cutting Mark's promising life short with the repeated episodes of sexual conduct he so longed for. Mark's blue eyes pleaded up at him from behind those water-spotted glasses. The suspense was killing him.

Then, in that back alley behind their favorite Chinese place with the cold rain drenching each of them to their very bones, Roger disregarded everything he knew to be sensical, pushed thoughts of his girlfriend (who was probably fucking Benny somewhere, anyway) aside, took Mark's face in his guitarist hands and made out with him, hardcore.

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Afterthought:
So it's mega short. As they progress, they'll get longer. In case you haven't figured it out, absolutely everyone falls in love with Mark. And that's about the entire plot so far.And... yeah...it's hella repetative. But I'll try and make it worth your time.